Am I the only one??? Re: child’s sleeping

Am wondering if it's just me or maybe I'm not alone in the world. DS is 4.5 years old....and you'd think after a year or two you'd say goodbye to sleep deprivation...but alas I haven't! DS sleeps in his own room, we have a bedtime routine, yet because DS has this thing about monsters in his bedroom (thanks to the cat giving him a heck of a fright one night outside his window)...I have to sit in his room and wait for him to go to sleep...sometimes if he's mucking around it could take a couple hours!...on good nights he's asleep 30 minutes after the bedtime routine starts. Anywhos having a full nights rest comes few and far between, most nights he comes into our room one to four times. My ears prick up as soon as I hear the door, I get up and he starts heading back to his room, climbs into bed, then back to sleep.
I guess it doesn't help the we live with so many people, and maybe that has something to do with it...but we are moving in September. I'm fine surviving on broken sleep, but I know it's not good for my boy.

Just wondering if others are going through this, or have been through this and found solutions.

Are the "monsters" the reason he is coming in, as he is scared? If so, could you give him a torch or something and tell him if he feels scared then he can use the torch and check there are no monsters anywhere? Sticker charts for staying in bed all night etc?

Yeah he probably is reliant, given in the past I use to lie with him in his bed til he fell asleep. And yep I find that if he sleeps with me, or DF (as sometimes I'll just climb into his bed when he's in ours) he sleeps the whole night..though even with DF he'll sometimes come find me. I've definitely been thinking about the sticker chart KH25 so might whip one up and start it tonight. DF was asking if this is normal and what do couples with lots of children do...I was like...I think with you're first child you learn lots of things so when the next child comes along you'll know what things to do differently, and I've googled about it and its a relief to know I'm not the only one lol.
He has a night light in his room, but maybe a torch will help him out a bit. I have tried the "tuck into bed, lights out, out of the room I go", but he'll keep coming out, unless I say I'll check on him a short while after, and regularly do it. I think maybe I'll move on to that again so I'm not actually in his room, and then grade it from there. Wish I could wave a magic wand!....cos I know it'll be hard work to start with for awhile.

Edited by ooEvaoo

Does he have a teddy of some kind? My girl won't sleep alone at all (she's a fair bit younger though) but she'll sleep all night in her own room if she's in the mood to consider her doll company. She goes through phases where she tosses it out of bed and wants us instead, but more and more she's happy as long as she's got her doll.

When we toughened up my youngest would still come out of bed quite frequently, but we would just take him straight back. I still do pop in to check on them frequently as well. Whatever you do will be harder the first couple of nights and get easier. DF took care of bedtime for a week and I stayed completely out of the picture at first because it was me they usually wanted. It sounds mean but it's not - it's just teaching them how to go to bed on their own which they need to know how to do at some age.

LG wrote: I went to a sleep seminar once and someone said they had mixed water with drops of lavendar essential oil in a spray bottle for 'monster spray' (like fly spray), maybe that would help with the fear of monsters??

One of the Mum's in my due in thread did something similar for her DD and it worked well

My grandad used to do a magic spell each night over the phone to make sure we had a good sleep and no bad things visited us - It had us all absolutely convinced

My DS is good through out the night (most nights, we do get the odd night he'll wake once or twice) but for the last couple of months wakes at 5 and is awake and ready to start the day, we have tried putting him back to bed, letting him get into bed with us, getting into his bed, letting him play etc. I was googling tips lastnight and came across the Gro Clock and love the concept so ordered one and it arrived this afternoon so tonight is the first night giving it a go so crossing fingers it works. We did a few 'practice' runs before bed tonight and he grasped the concept really well and seemed to love it! time will tell in the morning though lol

xXELAx wrote: If he really really is stuck on having you there, you could leave the room a few minutes at a time and then work your way up to being out of the room more than in it and so on...

I have seen them do this on supernanny, tell him you will be back to check that hes ok and start by going back after 1 min, then next time a 2 min gap, then 3 min and so on, he will eventually fall asleep waiting for you to come back.

or else another one I have seen is each night you move your chair closer to the door until eventually one night you are out the door in the hall and then down the hall etc.

Thomas has a monster slaying sword. Its a cheap little plastic sword from the $2. After the nightly routine of mummy going in and telling all the monsters to sod off else i'll smack their bottoms, Thomas gets into bed with his plastic sword at the ready to bonk any over the head should they come and annoy him! Works really well :D

This was all because Thomas would do the same thing. Up and down all blimmin night. he does wake up at 4am on the dot every morning no matter what time he goes to bed at night - but at least its not all night. I just MADE him get back into his room. Wether he stayed in bed or not wasnt my issue - he just needed to stay in that room.
We've used all the clocks and aids imaginable to get him to stay in bed, but they dont work. They're marketing crap.