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Forum LockedHow to talk to DH about his drinking

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MyLilSquishy View Drop Down
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Location: Dunedin
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MyLilSquishy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 December 2010 at 5:51pm
Hey hun


i don't have any experience with people with drinking, but have talked to people about other addictions before...


does her ever see how many empties he has? or do you clean up in the morning before he sees them? maybe keep every single empty for a week, then on a sunday morning, have them all lined up on the bench/table so he can actually see, and that could be your starting point...?


also don't speak in "I's" ('i think, i feel, i know) because while it may be affecting you, it is HIS 'problem', so turning it into your problem makes it seem worse, because its like you are attacking him?

try 'do YOU think, do YOU feel, etc...'



and I think the 'if you need to drink to de stress, then we have a problem' line that kiwikt mentioned is a good one.


Also could try leaving the AA info around, but if he sint interested in changing, he wont notice them.

I agree with the rock bottom statement. Maybe you could suggest he attend AA, and if he refuses or picks a fight, just walk out with your daughter and is there anyone you may be able to stay with? (or go for a 'holiday' with DD to your family/friends in another city and make him realise that you wont tolerate it anymore? (personally i would not be comfortable with DP drinking that much and often with DS in the house)


maybe write him a letter and leave it for him and go out with DD for the day? let him read your points (amount, cost, time etc) and he will have time to think about it. at the end of the letter, mention for him to ring you when he is ready to discuss it calmy, resposibly and like adults?



anyway I hope they help and huge hugs hun! good luck!
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mummy_becks View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummy_becks Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 December 2010 at 10:31am

My mum had this problem with my dad. He will now admit he was an alcoholic, but it took a long time. For my dad it was nearly losing his life that did it for him. When you talk to him try that line that is killing him, and does he really want to leave behind a wife and 2 kids?

I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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