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cuppatea
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 7:29am |
Nikki wrote:
Also one thing my mum pointed out recently - if theres 3 kids then one always seems to be left out or not get on as well as the other two. I was actually going to post and see if people from 3 kid familys felt that?!? |
My Dh is the youngest of three and he said he felt left out, he has two older sisters though.
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BugTeeny
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 7:32am |
My aunty has three kids - girl, boy, girl.
They had their usual sibling rivalries growing up, but they always had each other's backs. They're best friends now (22, 21 and 16).
I always envied them having someone else to play with if they were pissed off with the other
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ElfsMum
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 7:38am |
I always wanted..and hopefully will have in a few weeks.. 2 boys. Now I have them even though family are bleating about 'trying for a girl' as i am the only childbearing one on one side and on the other they are all boys except the one that was adopted out, we are done.
I know because I hate being pregnant, pregnancy is hard on our relationship and while I love babies I dont think i will be wishing I had another:) it helps DH feels the same and if he could be pregnant well maybe then;) but anyway I agree with Julia ...i think if you aren't sure...you probably want another:) but that doesnt make the process any easier esp with other little ones!
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my4beauties
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 8:33am |
re: the 3 child thing and one being left out... there were 4 in our family but I was the 3rd girl and youngest so older 2 always left me out! And my younger brother was just a pain in the a$$ all our younger years. HOWEVER, we all get along great now and are best of friends!
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My babies: R (9),G (7), J (5)
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minik8e
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 8:38am |
This whole "3rd child" thing being uneven etc scares me the way you're talking about it LOL
I KNOW our family isn't complete. We originally planned on 2 children, that was it, but having got two in one go, DH is very happy to try again. And neither of us would have a problem with another set of twins (in fact, I would love it). DH wants to get the snip after the next one/s but I think I'll ask him to wait a bit, just in case. He does want to wait until the girls are 3 or so though, and I don't want to wait that long - mainly for the reasons that you say nzpiper. I would rather get all the pregnancies over and done with (I'm not good at pregnancy) so then we can focus on the children and I can sort out my career etc when the kids are at school, instead of getting a brief glimpse of freedom (with kindy) and then having to start at the beginning all over again.
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myfullhouse
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 8:42am |
I am the oldest of 3 kids and we always got on better when their was just 2 of us together, didn't matter what the combination was. But I don't remember lots of squabbling, just the usual. We are all pretty good friends now though.
I have always wanted 3 kids, it seems like the right number. DH often says 2 are enough but that is usually when I am grumpy and sh*tty after having a bad day. I think this time we will aim for about a 3yr age gap so that Ben will be at Kindy and Jack at school which should hopefully take the pressure off a bit during the day. Plus I would hope that they are both sleeping well by then (I currently get up at least twice to each of them!  )
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peanut butter
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 8:51am |
We had a talk last night and it hasnt been ruled out. We are looking at contraception options and have been looking at the Billings Method (looking for signs of Ov etc) and I think it needs a big leap of faith. I believe I know my cycle well enough to do it but I think we need to be totally ok with the option of an oopsy before we start that..( because secretly I have a fear that whenever DH's sperm get near me they create a baby......we've had NO trouble TTCing)
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Snappy
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 9:05am |
I did wonder about whether it was me just wanting another "Baby" and not thinking about the fact that they grow up lol! But after wanting to adopt that wee deaf boy last month it got me thinking about my own family and whether it was complete or not.
Pregnancy with Jackson was painful and I was in constant pain.. lots to think about.
I am the oldest of three kids. It was mainly my middle brother that I played with, although the three of us had lots of fun playing lego and cars together! My middle brother is also the favourite, but my youngest is the most spoilt. I am my Grandmothers favourite.
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lisa85
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 9:57am |
We have just decided to try for number 3. I have wanted another since the day the girls came home lol but the timing just has never felt completely right, until now that is :)
I think there are always going to be reasons not to have a baby you just have to go with your gut. For me I knew my family didn't feel complete 3 sounds like the magic number for us and right now I just feel like everything is right, and yes I can still think of a thousand reasons not to do it but sometimes you just have to trust your instincts :)
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caitlynsmygirl
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 10:26am |
Nikki wrote:
Also one thing my mum pointed out recently - if theres 3 kids then one always seems to be left out or not get on as well as the other two. I was actually going to post and see if people from 3 kid familys felt that?!? |
no
although in my family , my younger sister is special needs , so my brother and I were closer , but we both adored and looked out for our baby sis
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BaAsKa
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 10:44am |
this is a very interesting thread!!!
When DH and i first started discussing kids we hummed and harred between 3 or 4 kids but after having a few we seemed to fall into the "3 will do" catagory. After Karma was born i thought "yup this is it, iv got 2 boys and now a girl, im done and happy"........
The other night DH was being a smart arse and in his rambling he mentioned me being his "incubator" (smart arse) again some day....i was shocked and said "nop thats it for me, im a dried arrangement now" and he just stared in silence so??.......
Iv been thinking lately about having #4 (which would absolutely be the last) but it wouldnt be for another 5yrs at least!! (im 26) and like others have said we would have to get a bigger car and build another room on the house!!!. I have just bought a big car that fits the 3 kids nicely.
to answer the main Q lol - i loved going from 2 to 3 and i knew the minute Astin was born that he would not be the last (i even cried when DH joked that 2 was it!  )
I love having 3 kids!! i cant pinpoint what it is about it - i just love it!!
oh and the other 3 kid thing - my DH is 1 of 3 and there wasnt 1 kid inparticular that got left out - he is the middle and the fav, the oldest is a girl and only girl and the youngest is their precious baby boy so each get spoilt in different ways
but heres my Q About the cluckiness - DOES IT EVER END!!??? WHERE DO YOU DRAW THE LINE????
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mumtooboys
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 10:51am |
Ok, to throw another element into the mix....what if one of you wants another one (or two) and the other one doesn't? LOL
This is my 'issue' at the moment; I just don't feel like our family is complete yet (not least of which cause I was under the impression we were doing at least 3) and DP says he doesn't want to. Now in saying that , ALL his reasons are practical ones, emotionally and in his heart he'd have another one in a heartbeat. So at the moment I am trying to work through the practical reasons NOT to, and to be fair most of the ones he's got I actually agree with, vs my very strong desire to do so. LOL
I wanted 4, he said 4 was too many so we kind of agreed on 3, but after DS2 was born he's pretty much been working to the premise that he's it and we're done and I don't feel like that; I'm trying to work out how, or even IF I can get past his methodical men reasons, when in my head I know he's right but my heart don't want to listen.
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Flutterby
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 11:11am |
I have been feeling clucky lately as well. And DP even brought up the subject the other night. But I want to wait till DS is at least 4 yrs old and we are in a bigger house. I had a terrible time with MS with DS and am scared how I would handle it if next time was the same. So I figured if I wait till he is 4 by then he will be able to look after himself better and will then be off to school by the time bubs is born (if it all works out that way).
I am getting a kitten next week which will hopefully take care of the cluckiness for a while
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linda
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 11:37am |
When does the cluckiness ever end....I think you'll always have it to a certain extent but when you're 40plus, have four boys you sort of know its time to stop!
We were originally happy with two boys but I really wanted to try for a girl. I realised the chances of having a girl were slim but DH agreed and we ended up with twin boys. I found going from one child to two hard but going from two to four was easy even with twins.
Good luck!
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Mum2ET
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 12:25pm |
Both DH & I come from 3 children families and I have also thought I would like to have 3 children (2 girls and 1 boy in an ideal world). I think the idea of having a bigger family when you get older (bigger family gatherings etc).
After having Ella I still thought that, but at the beginning on this pregnancy I said to DH that 2 would have to be it for us as I was never getting pregnant again (not really enjoying being pregnant and looking after a toddler, plus I am still on anti nausea drugs for the M/S). But lately have been thinking that I would still like to have 3rd (would really,really like to have another little girl so that Ella could have a sister- something I missed out on having 2 brothers). Haven't told DH yet, as I think we will just wait and see how #2 goes but if we did decide on a 3rd it would be once Ella started school. If only I could have a 3rd child, without having to go through all the pregnancy stuff....
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Nikki
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Posted: 11 January 2010 at 1:36pm |
We had one of DH's workmates over yesterday with 2 of his 3 boys (aged about 9-14) and just talking about their food bill really makes me think twice about 3 kids! Ours eat enough already - imagine them as teenagers --- you would be basically working to eat!!
Then dh wants to put Jake thru motor racing / karting etc and I would love Morgan to do dancing/gymnastics etc .... plus school fees and all the usual toys/clothes .... = arghhh
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DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs)
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