Oh, I’m so clucky! But...

I've been he thinking about this lately not long after having my twins I was definately not having any more! And have to admit in the first weeks I thought I had made a horrible mistake.

I really struggled with sleep deprivation, BF was a huge struggle I put huge pressure on myself to continue and was overly anxious about everything. I could relate to a thread a while back on relationships post-baby too.

18 months down the track its so much easier I love my toddlers to pieces. Someone recently called me a 'natural mother' kinda have to laugh I really wasn't. Nice compliment though.

So I had convinced myself no-more kids (and DH) but I recently sold the baby capsules and for two days thought hmm maybe I shouldn't have... not sure if family feels complete. Not keen on doing the baby bit again but think I would be so much more confident 2nd time around.

If I do think about family in 10 yrs time it would be nice if it was busy ie one more. I could write so many pros/cons either way. Even thinking on a global leval does the world need more humans probably not. I am so indecisive, how do you know for sure?

*puts hand up* yep, in the same boat here. My girls are only 3 and 1 and after the 2nd I was determined that would be the last, but then earlier this year we were like "maybe a 3rd would complete us" and "wouldn't it be nice if we tried to add a boy to this mix" but we decided to put the idea away for a while. Then unexpectedly we found ourselves expecting no 3, the timing was really bad and while DH came round to the idea quickly, I still struggled with it - really didn't want to go through the horrible parts of being pregnant, was trying to find a job etc. But then I found a job with an employer that was happy to accept my situation, I had come round to the idea of a 3rd joining us and things were looking brighter, but then it all changed when I found out I had a missed MC. WE got past that and put the idea away again, then lots of friends around us were announcing their pregnancies at the stage I would've been at and now I'm all undecided again. I try not to think about it, but DH keeps bringing it up. One minute he's like "3 would be nice" and then he's decided "I like just having our 2 girls" and yes most of the "do we, don't we" revolves around finance, my new job, whether I want to go through the pregnancy and newborn stage again with the BFing and lack of sleep while trying to also look after 2 under 5s and whether or not to go back to work. My latest resolve is that we forget about for the next year or so before revisitng the idea, maybe when our eldest is at school and I'm more settled in my job. But if we won lotto tonight then I'd be jumping DH's bones tonight! OVing right now so ideal time to knock me up straight away!!!

Edited by Troods

Danda08 wrote: From talking to my friends I kinda get the feeling that when you're done you know it, so while you're indecisive you're probably not finished. And I think that's me. I hope that I do decide I'm finished cos it makes so much sense logistically & financially for us to only have 2.

There are quite a few vasectomy reversals done so obviously people are quite certain then change their minds. For the same reasons I hope I decide 2 is enough.

Like Troods think I will revisit it in 6mths-1yr. DH is leaning towards no more but think he could be convinced but he has said if more he would not want to have a big gap as does not want to be an old dad he is 33 plus he figures you spend 20 ish years putting most of your money to the kids so they get a good start then after that save for retirement.

Danda, I'm sorry I can't remember if your girls are ID or Frat. Don't forget if Frat we have a 1 in 4 chance of twins again..

We are currently trying for #2, our last, we both agreed that 2 would be our lot cause logistically, anymore than that just gets too difficult and costly..... bigger car, bigger house, harder for travel (DF's from Ireland so visits back there every now and again are a given). But I was thinking the other day about what it was like for me growing up as one of 6 kids. It was pretty crap when we were younger cause 5yrs between each of us so I never had anyone close in age to me but now we are all older we get along great. 1x brother and 1x sister live overseas but 1x brother and 2x sisters still live in CHCH and it's cool. I just think 'what if we only have 2 kids and one of them moves overseas and leaves the other one all alone' kinda thing.... maybe we will have a third in a few years but that is IT! Definitely no more than that for me!

Awwwww I love the newborn stage! That is what I miss the most! Sleepless nights and all

Oh yeah but it did take me over a year to get clucky again after DS2 I was sooooo not interested! I kept everything though coz I have a 2 year rule.

And Lisa I love the NB stage too!!! Its just so snuffly and soft and new and delicious

I dont mind the sleepless nights really, heck, I've managed thru 2 kids already!!
Its the husband thats the problem. Just like this:

http://tinyurl.com/3fluxrh

MissAngel wrote: I dont mind the sleepless nights really, heck, I've managed thru 2 kids already!! Its the husband thats the problem. Just like this: http://tinyurl.com/3fluxrh

LMFAO!!!!!! Soooo good!!! Sooooo true!!!