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Mintyfresh 
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 Topic: Troublesome trying
Posted: 11 April 2012 at 10:36pm |
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Hi everyone,
I was just looking for the right thread to post in, but no where feels right for me at the moment, so here is a new thread :)
DH and I have been trying for 9 months this month - our first was due on Anzac day, but we have lost all three pregnancies to date and we have also not conceived for the last two cycles of trying, which is very new to us.
As my first was an ectopic, our next pregnancy determines what happens - a baby would be fantastic, a miscarriage would give us a referral to a recurrent loss clinic. Now my body isn't cooperating.
Is anyone else still trying after a series of losses? Have you found it hard to keep going as time passes?
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farmgal72
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Joined: 31 March 2012
Location: Oamaru
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Posted: 13 April 2012 at 11:58am |
Hi Mintyfresh!
So sorry for all your heartaches!
I hope things improve for you.
Have you read The charting girls forum? It seems there have been some similar experiences......
I wish I could help, but I am TTC#1.....and 39.
I will be thinking of you 
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39 yrs
TTC #1 since March 2012
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Mintyfresh
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Posted: 14 April 2012 at 12:42pm |
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Thanks farmgal, I don't chart at all, so I don't think that would be the right place for me either.
Good luck with your trying :) I hope it goes well and you don't have to try for too long!
Two days until expected ov here - fx we get lucky this month!
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chonny
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Posted: 14 April 2012 at 6:00pm |
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hi love, i feel for you, i havent been through this exactly except that i currently have all the symptoms of being preggy yet arent and am now two month od for AF. sucks have the wait aye hun
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kelzie_rose
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Posted: 14 April 2012 at 8:02pm |
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Hey Minty,
Hun, I'm so sorry that you've gone through all this. It's just not fair.
After my third loss, my fertility guy told us not to get pregnant, and I knew that I was done. I couldn't do it any more. A month later I was pregnant. I'm not going to tell you to relax, because that's easier said than done. And I'm not going to say that if you don't try, it'll happen because that doesn't always ring true.
I am going to say that you should have faith that it can happen. We got our baby four years after we starting trying.
All the best lovie xx
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 Started TTC Apr 2008 With PCOS and a bicornuate uterus Our angel babies Jan 2010 <3 Oct 2010 <3 Apr 2011 <3
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Mintyfresh
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Posted: 14 April 2012 at 11:45pm |
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Chonny I assume you're getting negative blood tests? That is so strange, although I know someone who had that happen recently, her blood works were all normal and they don't know why it happened.
Kelzie, that is reassuring. Your little girl is beautiful, and I love her name :) do you think you'll try for another?
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chonny
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Posted: 15 April 2012 at 12:51am |
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Hi Minty,
actually i havent gone to my gp for bloods as i know she will say not to stress, although this time round i will be asking for an internal too as internally feels preggy too. IYKWIM
Anyways, just wanted to say i feel for you and my thoughts are with you
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Mintyfresh
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Posted: 15 April 2012 at 12:18pm |
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Thank you :) let me know how you go if you do go to the doctor for tests!
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Storm11
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Posted: 16 April 2012 at 8:41am |
Hi Minty! I'm so sorry you have had to endure three MC's  I have had 2 and am now on to our 10month of trying for #2. I have just got a BFN today and AF is on her way  we will try again this month but I am finding it extremely difficult to keep going. Just so frustrating as our DD was conceived first month of trying, so I was just expecting it to be just as easy when we were ready to try for #2. Now I constantly ask myself "what if" What if we had just started trying like a year earlier or something.... would it have made a difference?
I can totally understand where you are coming and just how you must be feeling!
Do you test for OV or anything? I do and I actually think in a way it makes it harder as you know you have BD exactly when you should and it still doesnt work!
Chin up though, fingers crossed it happens really soon for you. A friend of mine has suggested Acupuncture and swears by it... maybe an option you can look at?
Also, my GP told me after my 2nd MC that if it happened a 3rd time she would send me for testing.... such a shame we have to wait for "that next MC"
Our bodies are mysterious things..... big hugs to you 
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TTC #2 6+ yrs. Multiple chemical losses, 4 IVF rounds, multiple FET's. Fingers still crossed for a miracle to come our way 
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kelzie_rose
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Posted: 16 April 2012 at 9:58am |
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No, we wont be trying for another. The long TTC, the miscarriages, finances... And our family feels complete. We know our limit, and we know not to push it!
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Started TTC Apr 2008 With PCOS and a bicornuate uterus Our angel babies Jan 2010 <3 Oct 2010 <3 Apr 2011 <3
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Mintyfresh
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Posted: 17 April 2012 at 12:11am |
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Storm - funny you mention acupuncture. I tried it at a heal Christchurch event last month (around ov I think!) and DH tried natural touch - the lady told him would have strong babies, and the acupuncture day told me she would work on my fertility.
I used to test for ov, but after my ectopic I realized I could feel when I ovulated, so there was no need to test. I've never really not fallen preg,so the whole "but we did it at the right time" hasn't reared it's head thankfully. I can't even imagine how hard it is to have trouble conceiving paired with loss.
Kelzie as of today I understand exactly why you would choose to stick with one baby. I spent a lot of today at the pegasus health clinic because of a suspected ectopic. We have no definite answers besides that I am somehow pregnant and probably 6 weeks along.I should know more by Thursday. This is my fourth pregnancy since July 2011 and I just don't know how much more heartache I can take.
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epictraveller
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Posted: 17 April 2012 at 5:08am |
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Oh minty I'm praying its not ectopic and will be a nice sticky bubs for you! FX!!!
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#1  Angel babies April 2013, Nov 2013 IVF #1 Nov 2013-CP IVF #2 May 2014-BFN IVF #3 Feb 2015-BFN DS Jun 2015-BFN Oct 16 -Natural BFP! TTC #2
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chonny
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Posted: 18 April 2012 at 1:03pm |
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Minty thinking of you too hun! Keep us posted! big huge hugs and sticky vibes
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Mintyfresh
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Posted: 18 April 2012 at 9:06pm |
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I got my first bloods back today 29, so it looks like I am miscarrying. I'm seeing my doctor on Friday regarding a referral to a recurrent loss spec.
Hopefully this will help us get get there
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chonny
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Posted: 18 April 2012 at 9:13pm |
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big huge hugs Minty :(
Im cram[ping chronic today, and this morning was agony, but no AF yet, another HPT was neg today so i guess this could be af hearing her ugly head finally after 2 mths for me.
Good luck and keep us posted
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Twinklerose
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Posted: 18 April 2012 at 9:27pm |
Oh Minty, sorry to hear
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kelzie_rose
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Posted: 18 April 2012 at 11:12pm |
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Oh hun, I am so sorry :(
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Started TTC Apr 2008 With PCOS and a bicornuate uterus Our angel babies Jan 2010 <3 Oct 2010 <3 Apr 2011 <3
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TravelGal
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Posted: 19 April 2012 at 8:12pm |
Hugs minty. So sad to hear your news
take care
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redtulip
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Posted: 19 April 2012 at 8:35pm |
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Hi ladies,
Mintyfresh, I'm just so sorry to hear your news. I really hope that you're referral brings you some answers so you can continue your journey with some help when you feel ready.
I have had 2 missed mc's since DH and I started TTC just under a year ago. As much as we would desperately love a family it's so hard to think that it may happen again. I can totally understand why anyone might decide not to.
As mentioned, it is such a shame that we should have to suffer 3 losses before being referred. For me it's made it a bit easier to carry on this 3rd attempt.
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5 wee Angels - Always in our hearts - Aug '11, Feb '12, Aug '12, Feb '13, Aug '13
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Mintyfresh
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Posted: 20 April 2012 at 12:07am |
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Thank you everyone for your kind thoughts. I'm ok at the moment, I haven't started bleeding which is a concern as it is a suspected ectopic until my wed BT results come back tomorrow. That said it would be easier if I don't start bleeding until tomorrow after work.
Red tulip i am sorry to hear about your losses, may ask how far along you were when you found out?
I don't like it either, it's like a morbid goal post, and although I understand that it is to prevent overloading of the system by women who have had less than 3 miscarriages, i still wish that somehow the doctor could refer based on their judgement before you have to get to three losses. There must be some people who get to two or three losses and cannot deal with anymore and choose to stay childless.
Hopefully it is AF Chonny - but did you make it to your doctor at all, as you were saying you felt preg?
I had the day off work today, and so did DH - last night everything came to a head, it was very emotional and I let out a lot of anger and sadness and grief that had been pent up.
I'm usually quite stoic and I have only had time off work for recovery following my ectopic. I hadn't had any time off following my miscarriages.
I woke up this morning with a swollen face from crying so much, and I was so scared to talk to clients so it felt best to take a day for myself. I am really glad that I did. DH was going to go to work, but then when he started to leave I realized I was actually quite scared to spend the day by myself - I think it is related to the loneliness I feel when I miscarry.
I think the time we spent together today really helped our relationship as things were feeling very strained. I finally started knitting something for myself (I usually only knit baby clothes) and I spent an hour or two sleeping with my head on DH's lap - and bless him he sat still until I woke up
Off to see my GP tomorrow, hopefully she will confirm that my hcg has dropped to under 5, as I am still a bit scared that I'll get an abnormal result back.
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Troublesome trying
