Second babies

Just something I'm curious about really

So there are a few theories on what your second baby will be like:

- I remember thinking as I sussed stuff out with JJ that my second baby would be soo much easier because then I would have all the things worked out that I needed to (like tired signs and settling etc). But it seems that second babies don't always follow the instruction manuals we wrote with our first babies (thanks for letting us know, Bobbie )

- When I was pregnant with JJ my mother said he would be an easy baby because I was having a difficult pregnancy with hyperemesis and exhaustion etc. She was right, but I don't know if that's coincidence or not

- Then I have noticed that a lot of people seem to get the opposite to what they got first time. Genetics aside (my gut says relaxed people are more likely to get relaxed babies, more highly strung people are more likely to get more highly strung babies, and reflux is a whole different ball game, but apart from that), if they got a really easy baby first time round they seem to be more likely to get a more difficult to settle baby second time round, and if they got a stressy baby first time round they are more likely to get a chilled out bubba next time (or maybe it's that those parents learned ALL the tricks with #1!).

So, what I want to know is, how was your second baby compared to your first? And did you have easy or difficult pregnancies? Could you use the first edition of your instruction manual or did you need to rewrite it?

(Course what I really want to hear is: "second babies are so much easier!" )

Sorry for my usual verbosity

welll ummmm yeahhh

Pregnacy this time around was harder in the fact that with Rhiannon we didnt know anything was wrong until 30wks.

With Cory i was monitored from day dot.

Cory is cruiser than Rhiannon was, but he is also sicker, as in has lots of allergies which we are trying to work through.

From that point of view he is a lot harder, but from a second time around point of view hes a lot easier, but im not so stressed and i have thrown away all my books.

Rhiannon taught me that my instincts are always right.

I also do things different, am more relaxed and tend to just go with the flow now

so i would say 50/50 really

I had a relatively easy baby first time around and everyone said that since the first was 'easy' it meant the second wouldn't be.

My second (who is only 4 weeks admittedly) has been even easier than my first! She started doing 6 hours overnight from 2 weeks, and doesn't cry anywhere as much as I remember my first doing.

I think part of it is temprament, part of it experience and being a lot more relaxed about everything second time around.

if toby (my second child) had been my first then i wouldnt have had any more.

my first was a piece of cake... still a relatively cruisy kid. But toby was hard work and still is! the pregnancy was ok too, no major morning sickness and stuff but he was transverse and had to be turned twice! and out of all my births (not that 3 is many) he was by far the easiest and best!

My 1st pregnancy health wise was easy peasy, and despite being in a horribly abusive relationship he came out a super relaxed easy peasy baby (I left said relationship when E was 4 months) .. my 2nd pregnancy sucked for obvious reasons! And as for the babies, I got one of each. V is hard work and little E for the most part very much like her brother.

Reading with interest here! Wanted to ask the same question. No, I am not pregnant, just thinking about it but TERRIFIED I will have the same roller coaster over again.

Both my kids have been about the same... happy little social butterflies, sleep well, feed well (both decided boob was no good and chug back the formula like theres no tomorrow) both are/were in no hurry to move around...

I find Jae easier because I prepared myself mentally for a new baby (plus I had remembered SOME of what I did with DS) and she was planned, and anticipated, whereas with B, he was a surprise that made himself known just after I turned 19, I had NO idea about babies in general, and had noone to ask questions so just struggled by myself, and made a bit of a mess of things tbh...

pregnancy wise.... B was easier because (as someone else said) I didnt have another littlie to contend with, plus apart from the HG until 16 weeks, everything was a breeze (right up until I went into labour... but I wont go into that story ) Jae on the other hand... I went from ms to HG, to controlled with meds ms... then early labour scare at 29 weeks, fainting at work, and feeling pretty damned miserable (tried not to complain at the time cos it had taken so long to get her!) but the birth experience was something I could quite easily repeat (and soon hopefully!)

best of luck with #2!

oh and for the record.. I am highly strung and worry far too much... and have wound up with 2 very relaxed, happy kids... go figure (diff dads too!)

I have two totally different children!

Different fathers for a start, and I was in a horribly abusive relationship for the first one and left when he was four months too!    Sam has wanted to conquer the world from day one and I'm pretty sure he hasn't stopped moving since he was born.    Although he slept well, he is just non stop.   He talks non stop, is moving non stop, always doing something.    I couldn't believe it when he started getting around the house at 4 months old on the back of his head.   He was formula fed from 2-3 weeks old so was very much in a routine, in his own bedroom from then too.

Jamie is my boobie baby!   I never thought breastfeeding was a possiblity for me as I had a multitude of problems with Sam and looking back I realise that most of it was psychological and environmental rather than a physical problem that he or I had.     He screams a fair bit and likes to be cuddled a lot and doesn't seem to sleep as much as Sam did BUT personality wise he is a lot more relaxed and laid back.      Jamie also sleeps in my bedroom with me beside my bed and I don't ever want to give that up!   

So I think a lot of my differences come from having a lovely supportive partner this time who actually wants to be a dad and takes an active role in Jamie and Sam's life.   And feeling so much more relaxed and confident within myself without the added stress and anxiety of making sure I didn't anger the abusive beast.   I am free to concentrate on my children!

Oh and pregnancies - second time around was much better.     First time I had high BP, infected wisdom tooth, bad MS until 20 weeks, stress.   Second time around I had mild MS until 13 weeks and relatively bad SPD from 35 weeks onwards.

Sorry that was a ramble!

Isabella is a million times harder than Caden, she has reflux and is quite an unsettled baby in general. and like Bizzy said, of she had of been my first I dont think Id have had anymore!!!! She does my head in some days!(tho i love her to bits lol)

the pregnancy was harder too at times, i was admitted to hospital at 36 weeks for an iron infusion and had a lot of pain towards the end on my cervix.

It was a real kick up the ass having an easy baby first then a hard baby second.

But then, there were other things that were easy second time round, you already know what to do and just plod along

you will be all good rachael!!

Edited by Sheza

Won't deter me but might've made me wait a bit! Too late for that now

My pregnancy with Hollie was cruisy and after she got over the colic she's been a great wee one. This pregnancy is already quite a bit harder, I'm feeling relatively confident we can pull it off though.