abortion

Hi EllenMumof2,
I totally agree with you and it makes me feel sick to think of someone aborting a bubs that far along plus the clinics only abort at 12 weeks and no later because then it goes against ethics (gets termed a feotus from that point)- how do i know this?? - well i was sceduled in for 1 when i was 17 as my partner didnt want it at all but i couldnt go through with it at all and thought if he was any kind of decent guy then he would stick around when bubs was born but unfortunatly i had a MC at 14 weeks needless to say i am now married to him and he is so eager for me to keep popping the kids out!!!
Anyway i agree and disagree with abortions but only if theyr done earlier on and for an extremely valid reason!!!
I hope you feel better soon and that she maybe doesnt go through with it...

Hi EllenMumof2,
I totally agree with you and it makes me feel sick to think of someone aborting a bubs that far along plus the clinics only abort at 12 weeks and no later because then it goes against ethics (gets termed a feotus from that point)- how do i know this?? - well i was sceduled in for 1 when i was 17 as my partner didnt want it at all but i couldnt go through with it at all and thought if he was any kind of decent guy then he would stick around when bubs was born but unfortunatly i had a MC at 14 weeks needless to say i am now married to him and he is so eager for me to keep popping the kids out!!!
Anyway i agree and disagree with abortions but only if theyr done earlier on and for an extremely valid reason!!!
I hope you feel better soon and that she maybe doesnt go through with it...

I'm there with that they do have their place but that far along nope it is a feotus at that stage a little person.

I know my friend had one at 17 years old and it was done early and for the right reasons.

I can't believe they abort at 12 weeks, to me that's a person it's a little human being not a thing. It's sad that she is so willing to abort the baby but not wiling to have it and put it up for adoption! Sad Sad Sad

I a gree its sad. and not fair on the little one.

Amber, you can have terminations up to 20 weeks here, but under conditions where there is going to be a severe physical or mental effect on the mother.
The difference between getting it done at a clinic before 12 weeks and a specialist center thing after 12 weeks is because the process is different.

I'm not for or against having terminations after 12 weeks, but could not personally do it. And under circumstances where you have known about the pregnancy for quite a while, I think it is truly weird to wait longer than needed. But maybe she needed the time to get her head around the abortion thing? It isn't easy to grieve for your child when you know you have full responsibility for the decision. I think if she has decided she is going to terminate, she should go in ASAP rather than wait until 16 weeks... unless she is still unsure and using the excuse of being further along to get out of it?

Anyway, hope you both manage to get through it and maintain your friendship... sounds like she needs you right now! (Especially is the partner isn't there for her)

i have a silimr thing happen with a friend although she was only 6 or 7 weeks i,m prolife and thats were i stand but because she is shuch a close friend and i no it was hard for her to do it but it was a very uncomfortable convo none the less i still surport her even though i dont surport her dision

Well, I am pro choice. while I agree that it isn't very "morally nice" to have an abortion after 12 weeks, and some people might say it is never morally right, there would have to be genuine and strict reasons for the doctors to abort a baby after 12 weeks gest. I am quite sure it would be much much harder to get one after this stage than it is before the 12 week stage. I have to say, from experience, that an abortion isn't something that people enter into lightly, and often women having them deal with then on their own, as people have such black and white opinions of it.
While I wouldn't have one now, I have had one previously, and it was absolutely the right thing for me to do at the time, I was suffering severe depression, and was in a really awful place in my life. I know this is all a bit rich, coming from me, who has been on here boo hooing about my 2 friends and their still born babies, but I really honestly believe that it is an individual and personal choice, and it is a very difficlut situation and decision for the woman concerned to make. i hope your friendship survives this, and I hope you acn support your friend in her decision, even if you don't agree with it, she still needs love and support.

they will have to go through counsilling to determine if their needs for the abortion match it if u get me. Noone in this country can really abort just coz they can they have to be seen by a counsiller etc

I personally hate the word abortion, it sounds more like an insult to humanity than the f-word.
I went along to a Dr's appointment with a friend of mine when I was 17 and her Dr refered to it as a "termination of pregnancy" (TOP) which I liked much better and as a result (of the Dr being so nice) I changed to that Dr.
Now my friend/flatmate who was 17 had a TOP and at the time I honestly could not see any reason why she would do this as she had a loving partner who had a nice job. But in reality, she was a struggling student and flat broke living with 2 other girls and the loving relationship only lasted 5 months!
Now as a 27 year old I have much different beliefs.
As a result of her TOP the next time she got pregnant was to a guy she had been seeing breifly and he wanted nothing to do with the pregnancy or her and she decided to keep the child because of the emotional damage the first one did.
I have nothing against this girl at all as the decisions that she made effected her life and not mine. And as a result I prefer to think of myself as pro-choice, the mothers right to make her own decision about her body. But in the same respect I know that I couldn't possibly go through the same process as I would become emotionally damaged like my young friend.
As of the case of your friend Ellen, I guess because you are on my mothers thread that I side with you. It is horrifying to see someone we know who creates life just to want to throw it away. But I guess we can never truely "take a walk in another persons shoes" when it comes to their lives and their problems.