Most embarassing labour moment

roflmao, my worst moment had to be when I decided that labour or not, I was going to do the groceries. THAT was NOT my most brilliant idea. I knocked over an entire stand of marmite, and this poor little couple in thier 80's were trying to pick it up for me. I just couldn't quite reach the jars as they rolled around the floor....

Coming towards the end of my labour, just before DS was born I had a complete "woe is me" moment and very dramatically (think 1950's hand on forehead) announced that "This is horrible"...hmmm, really, you think.

I still cringe about it today

The reply from the registra was "well, they don't call it vacation, do they?"...guess not!

I dont have anything remotely funny compared to that! What a crack up!!!!!

But I did get told off because they were waiting to give me an epi and I needed to go to the toilet and was told I was taking too long so they were banging on the door. Come on - I needed to poop - you can't hurry poop!

Bahahahahah Chickoin you totally made my day with your poo comment! Awesome

I wee'd on the table (after sitting on the toilet for 5 minutes trying).

Mum arrived 5 minutes before I started pushing. Of course I burst into tears (after holding it together through everything else) and said "Mummy, I can't do this!"
Gee, anyone would think I was 5!!

I put my hospital gown on backwards. In the movies they always open at the back and so I put it on like that and couldn't work out how I was supposed to do up the buttons down my back.

And I had IV lines in both hands and found it a little bit difficult when I had to use the bathroom. It most the most embarrassing thing ever to have to call out to DP to ask him to help afterwards

You guys must've had some great gas, mine didn't do anything (although DP reckons it worked great when he took a swig).

I have lots.

With Janaya I had an epidural, the MW told me to go to the toilet and that she would help me, I announced I was fine, got off the bed and fell flat on my face as I couldnt feel my legs. And then I just laughed cause it didnt hurt (it did afterwards though)

Just before Janaya was born i woke up crying to my mum that I had pooed my pants in my sleep Turns out I was ready to push.

With Jackson I actually thought I had died while going through the transition period. I felt very strange and was talking to DH about death and asked if i was "Dead yet".
I too, told my mummy I couldnt do it

Oh, and I just rememberd,the mw came in while I was in the bath and told me I could push, and said she would come back in a few mins. Mum told me to start pushing and I kept telling her I had no feeling or urge to push. MW came back and was behind me, while I was yelling "she is a LIAR! I am NOT READY TO PUSH!"
They all got me out of the bath and tricked me into getting on the bed. MW broke the rest of my waters and it felt like Jacksons head had hit the exit with a thud, and I yelled at the MW saying "see, I wasnt ready to push, you WERE a liar!!!"


Edited by kaiz231

oooooooo you guys are making me nervous! I just got to the bit about labour in my birth book and wanted to shut the page it seems too damn scary!
Is good that you see the funny side of it now though

baha these are great! Yip not sure about the mil and mum in the room while pushing though!

haha love it

I remember being in the tub and telling mum im not sure if i need to push or poo she almost sprinted to the nurses station to get the mw

and after being told he was feet first and i was going for a CS then there is not enough time you have to push i beleive my works were 'If your not going to cut the f**ker out reach in and drag him out!!!!' along with 'im holding him in until you get me the bloody drugs' after being told there was not time and to concentrate on sucking gas.

Oh and after he was born the first thing i said was "is it still a boy?"

i think thats all my stupid moments

ROFLMAO this thread has brightened up my whole day LOL...

I was in labour for ages without painrelief but then they realised Jake was stuck which is why I wasn't dilating. They gave me the gas while I was waiting the the epidural lady but it did jack til the epidural lady came in and told me I was sposed to be holding my breath. I then got completely stoned because I kept saying I was having contractions so they wouldn't take it off me and then began discussing my partner at the times private bits I wasn't being nice either hehehehe...

I had mum and dad with me and it was daddy who I was telling to help me lol actually my dad was the only one I would have anything to do with during my labour he loved it!

After 16+hrs of full-on labour and still only being 1cm dilated coz Jakes shoulder was stuck and he wasn't hitting my cervix, they told me I needed a c-section and went off to organise it. Within 45 minutes I thought I needed to poo but luckily my mum thought differently and ordered the midwife back in. She had a look and with a huge amount of shock informed the room she could see hair. I got really pissed off and yelled at her that I hadn't had my damn brazillian and could she please just focus and make sure nobody could see my poo!! LOL thankfully I didn't poo, the hair was Jakes head which had suddenly decided to present itself and coz the epidural had worn off for reasons they weren't sure of I was able to push and feel (OMG ring of fire ) and it all worked out fine. Everyone except me thought it was funny but that may have had something to do with the relief!