How do you calm your child

When you're ready to murder them when they've been screaming for hours?
This evening (same as last night, night before etc) Thomas has decided that he doesnt want to be in bed and that screaming until I give in and get him up is a great idea! Theres nothing wrong with him - clean bum, no temp, normal teething etc - he just doesnt want to be in bed.
The normal methods of shhing etc do not work - never have done. We've tried a bottle, cuddles, quiet talking and as soon as he goes back in his bed, the screaming starts again. We've had an awake child until midnight most nights.
He doesnt sleep during the day anymore, so it's not like he's actually had enough sleep - he gets put to bed at about 7 when he's so tired that he cant stay awake any longer and sleeps for around 1 hour and wakes again. I'm pretty over it - I dont get anything done during the day as it is!
Suggestions are welcome before I put him out for the garbage collection :D!

Poor you that must be hard!! He's not getting much sleep if he's dropped his day time sleeps - I agree he sounds like he's getting overtired which can make it harder to get them to sleep!

Last week my daughter, who is normally pretty good at going to sleep, just wouldn't let me put her down and screamed her brains out... she appeared well e.g. no temp or anything. I took her to the dr the next day and she had an ear infection. They can show no signs at all unfortunately and of course would be most painful when lying down...

Just something to consider and rule out before trying any behavioural methods i.e. controlled crying type stuff...

Good luck!!! It must be sooo tiring for you too!!!

Have you thought about contacting the family centre? My sister saw them for sleep probs with her girl and they were fantastic!

... that is awful that you can't get account for your child to see the dr?! I thought most doctors were pretty good at allowing credit esp for children...

Are you paying for him to go to the doctor? I thought it was free for children under 6 to see the doctor in NZ. I've never paid for any of my visits (and we've been lots coz I'm paranoid )

It sounds as if he is way over tired and has forgotten how to go to sleep by himself. Im surprised he doesn't have a daytime nap especially if he is not getting 12hrs at night.
First, I would go to the doctor and have him checked out and make sure he doesn't have an ear infection or something else. Then I would try and reintroduce that daytime nap. It will be hard work as he is really tired and self-soothing is a learnt skill, so you are going to have to teach him how to do it again.
Heres what our family centre had us do with Dominic when he stopped sleeping (day and night) at 3 months old:
Establish a bedtime routine. Dom's is daytime lunch, nappy change, brush teeth, drink of water and a couple of stories. Just change that bit to suit your baby, Dom used to have a bottle but he is almost 2 now so bit different. Then place in cot on his side, facing wall with teddy bear and dummy. Initially, we would try and leave the room straight away and if he screamed (not grizzled) then we would go back in. Resettle him on his side (don't pick him up), and put a hand on his shoulder and a hand on his hip. Don't talk or make eye contact that way he knows it is not time to play. Once he is calm then quietly leave the room again. It is a long and drawn out process but it is gentle on bubs, especially if they are going through a attachement stage. Eventually, you will have to re-enter the room less and less and it will take a shorter amount of time to resettle him.
At night we would do the same thing.
if you have a family centre then I would definately recommend you go there, your plunket nurse should be able to give you the number for centre if not in ph book.
I don't envy you it is very hard when they are crying and not sleeping and you just don't know why. Take care

If you want to visit a family centre you don't need to go to plunket just ring the reception for the ph number. It might even be in the phone book, I just added that in because in Hamilton the Family centre is unlisted.
You definately have to work with your baby, I have quite a few friends who babies won't sleep unless they are on their tummies. And we quite often find Dom on his tummy too.
Good luck for tonight!

Unfortunatly there isnt room at any of the other drs. When we moved here in 07 we had to wait til 08 to be able to even enroll for myself and hubby!

I see your in Rangiora? We just joint doctors in Belfast (got in straight away) and its FREE for kids and only $15 for adults - sweet!

Would you go to Belfast?

Hi Alex how did things go last night after he woke?  My girls dropped their day time sleep really early and also ended up sleeping on their tummies by themselves.  Saffron has said probably everything that I could come up with only other thing I would add is if Thomas doesnt want to sleep during the day, try and have some quite time while reading or just doing something really unstimulating and if you can you have that time with him so at least you are having a sort of a break also.  Also try and start his bedtime process earlier so he's not so over tired when he is getting put to bed, maybe read a book to him in there and have a wee something for him to play with so he relates it with being a happy place to be.  Then when he does wake in the night use the settling stuff ^^ like up there and don't engage with him at all - hard as it is and try to be as constant and calm as  you can even if your blood is boiling.  Hope things get better for you soon

Keira was about this age and the only way to get her to sleep was to rock her in her pram. Was a pain because she totally forgot how to self settle and never had a day nap in her bed again. At night we used to hold her down and pat her untill she eventually fell asleep. Wasn't exactly ideal but it worked, we gradually eased off the patting and eventually she was sleeping on her own.

Good Luck, sounds like he's over tired - a hard one to overcome but I am sure if he is able to get some extra sleeps in the day he will be a lot easier to settle at night.