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Mattsmum View Drop Down
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    Posted: 17 February 2012 at 10:06pm
My 3 1/2 year old has been dancing around our house for months, he loves walking on his toes and often says he is doing ballet. I enrolled him in a preschool ballet class starting this term. The first week he loved it, so I got him some ballet gear (black) he was so excited until he got to class and saw all the girls in their pink ballet things and felt very different. He now only wants to do ballet if he gets to wear pink. What would you do?

I'm sure its not a cross dressing thing, just a want to be the same as his classmates thing.
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pudgy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote pudgy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 17 February 2012 at 10:21pm
I'd get him some pink stuff
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Hopes View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Hopes Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 2:10am
Me too

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UpsyDaisy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote UpsyDaisy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 7:51am

A bit off your topic but I really don't like how pink is so genderfied. Thats what made you say is not a 'cross dressing thing' but it shouldn't matter what colour we wear and hes only 3 1/2!

100 years ago pink was a boy colour - watered down version of red (for valour).

I would let him wear whatever he wants.

PS I love that he loves dancing so much and that you are letting him do what he wants
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Mattsmum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mattsmum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 9:03am
Yeah its a shame pink has become such a girl thing.

I'm just nervous about the other parent's reactions if he wears pink I guess.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote mummymonster Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 9:33am
we were out and my 2 1/2 yr old had a "girl" toy, a stranger boy (about 6yr) came over and told him not to play with it because it was pink!
It's amazing we've got a society in which half of them are scared of a colour.

let him wear pink, he's 3 1/2 - let him play
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Aroha11 Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 9:40am
Let him wear pink - it would be a shame to have him stop something he loves over a colour.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Herewegoagain Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 10:50am
I agree with everyone and pink was originally a boys colour and seems to still be in fashion for some men who wear shirts and ties in the colour


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Hopes View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Hopes Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 11:30am
Well, we're probably a good cross-section of 'other parents', and everyone here seems to agree that pink's fine... so hopefully they'll feel the same way

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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote AandCsmum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 11:48am
Talk to the teacher about it, see what she says.
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UpsyDaisy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote UpsyDaisy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 1:14pm

I think talking to the teacher is a good idea too, thinking why didn't I think of that! Obviously she will have taught other boys and come across this issue before.

I can understand you wondering about what the other parents think but everyone who has commented here thinks its fine and really I would think the parents rather odd if they have a problem with a 3 1/2 year old boy in pink?
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Mattsmum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mattsmum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 1:14pm
The teacher gave him a pink cardi out of the lost property box.
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clover View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote clover Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 9:54pm
To be honest I don't know what I'd do. I don't think I'd like my boy dressed in girls ballet gear but perhaps a pink cardi or slippers or something would be ok but honestly, I don't think I would, my husband would not like it at all.
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Mattsmum View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Mattsmum Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 18 February 2012 at 10:21pm
We are working on building up the idea that he is special because he is a boy who wants to dance, black is great, he will learn to do great jumps etc. If he sticks with ballet we might let him have a pair of pink shoes or something but it is really just so he feels like he belongs.   I wish I knew another boy that would be keen on coming with him.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Stoked Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 February 2012 at 7:10am
Does the ballet teacher have some older boys that your DS might be able to come watch at some stage? He might be more comfortable if he see's the "Big Boys" wearing colours other than pink? (Not that I have a problem with little boys wearing pink, I just imagine that you'd rather not spend more money when you've already bought him ballet gear!)
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Kellz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kellz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 February 2012 at 8:17am
HEaps of the girls in DD's class wear black. I agree about asking the teacher if there are older boys he can watch- I know there are a couple of boys about 7yrs old at DD's ballet school!
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote LG Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 19 February 2012 at 7:02pm
DD1s ballet uniform is blue so it works out okay for the boy in her class. I think its great too that hes doing ballet and enjoying it, the mum in our class said everyone told her not to bring her boy because it 'wasnt for boys' which is stupid!



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Candkids View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Candkids Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 February 2012 at 9:41am
i would let him some pink stuff, kids are kids they dont like to feel different from the rest which in this case is hes the only one not wearing pink, i think its fantastic he loves ballet!

a friend of mines son does ballet he is 10 now and started when he was 4 she let him wear pink for a while and then he decided to wear black after a few months

DD 10.5yrs
DS 6yrs
DS 11mths
5 little angles watching from above
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote snugglebug Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 February 2012 at 8:12pm
I teach preschool dancing and I'm going to go against the grain and say don't put him in pink. Because as he goes forward in dancing if he does, then he won't be wearing pink, it's just not the done thing really and I can guarantee you wouldn't get the reaction you'd like from dancing mothers. Some, not all, can be real perfectionists and want everything to be just right and how they expect... perhaps you could get him a t-shirt or something with pink in it, or pink ballet shoes, so he has some element of pink to wear? And also talk to the teacher about ways to encourage him in the class so he doesn't feel too different and feels included no matter what he is wearing? As that is the teacher's job at the end of the day. As much as there shouldn't be gender colours, in my view the fact remains there are, and ideas that go along with them.... and a boy wearing pink at dancing does reinforce certain stereotypes about boys and dancing that you really don't want to buy into nor give other people opportunities to buy into. Im not saying it's right, I'm just saying thats how it is and the dancing world can be pretty superficial sometimes
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote snugglebug Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 20 February 2012 at 8:15pm
The kids in my class wear all colours and outfits, fairy wings etc if they want to, is it possible for him to put together an outfit he likes to wear?
Me 28, DH 29
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