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minik8e
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Topic: What made you decide to TTC... Posted: 31 March 2008 at 2:59pm |
Ok, I just have a question for those of you TTC, especially if you have endo.
How did you decide when to TTC?
I'm asking because we are a little worried about possible fertility issues with endo, and possible recurrent m/c. Did you make the decision to TTC early on the basis that it may take a while to get pg, or, for those who this is relevant to, that you may have recurrent m/c? Or did you just decide you were ready and know that it may take a while, and possibly not happen at all?
We are thinking of TTC end of this year, start of next year, DP would like at least one child before he turns 30 (Nov 09). However, I have endo and all of my previous pregnancies (x4 over the space of 10 years) have ended in m/c at between 6-10 weeks.
I hope what I'm asking comes out right, it's so hard to put it into words!!
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mummy_becks
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 3:48pm |
The fact that I was told as I get older it will be harder for me to get pregnant and that once I hit 30 i'm going to have the baby oven bits removed so no chance after they've gone to have children.
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I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived!
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emz
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 3:55pm |
I was told I would find it hard (no endo at that stage but starting to develop more now, have PCOS and prostratic glandular uterus) so we decided to TTC as soon as we got married (did before, but then stopped as I didn't want to be pg when we got married). So yep, time was a factor as I've always wanted to be a youngish mum (well at least younger than 30 to achieve what I want to achieve with kids and family) so we had o get our A's into G!
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Freesia
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 3:59pm |
I am very overweight and thought I'd have trouble trying to conceive so this made me want to start trying early. It never happened though because DP didn't feel ready. As soon as he felt ready we started - 12 years down the track!
If he had've been like your DP and wanted kids straight away we would've gone for it. When there are fertility issues and a higher risk of miscarriage I think I would've definitely started trying as soon as we could. As it was we got pregnant the 2nd month but we were very lucky there.
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minik8e
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 4:11pm |
It's very very scary, not knowing. The doctor did tell me to have my children now, rather than later, as I will probably have to get my bits removed. But then, what if it doesn't happen....arrgh, what a process. DP is in two minds....ideally he would like to be married first, but he is also worried about the time factor (and me even more so, because it would be at least 2 years before we got married)...oh I dunno, so confusing, too many what if's.
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kebakat
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 6:47pm |
One of my friends has extremely nasty endo that just seems to go totally nuts. She's single and 28 (almost) and has been told by her doc that her time is running out that her bits need to be removed in the next couple of years. She so wants to be a mum but it's a bit hard when she is single.
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VioletStar
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 8:20pm |
I have PCOS and have known since I was 16 that I'd have trouble concieving, been a year TTC so far, and that's with meds and being monitored.
DP & I had been together for just over 4 mths when we decided we wanted to start trying, knowing that it could take a long time... I was 22 then and he was 27.
We didn't just jump into it not knowing each other... he chased me for 4 years lol, how's that for playing hard to get
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minik8e
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 8:26pm |
LOL wishin - we've known each other around 8 years, and flirted around with the idea for a few years before we actually got together...been 7 months now, and bought a house together 6 weeks ago. So I'm not worried about not knowing each other. He is the best, I love him to bits, and I know he does me as well  I also know he worries as well, we have discussed it, especially as we both dearly want children.
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Emmecat
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 8:31pm |
I don't have endo or PCOS or anything physically wrong (fingers crossed, touch wood!  ) but I DO have a case of Terminal Independance lol  Am slowly treating it with the help of a very patient DP and our new foster child (who we are probably going to adopt). Whilst we would both like to add to our family, we are ttc now (and have been for about 4 months prior to my m/c earlier his month) mainly because I am old and crusty haha (34). So better get a crack on.  I don't think any time is ever the perfect time to ttc, you just have to make a decision adn I would personally make it knowing that it may well take longer than you anticipated,esp if you have known fertility issues. It's a hard call but I haven't heard of anyone regretting having their baby when they did!
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VioletStar
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 8:42pm |
minik8e - Yup we are the same, both really want children/family. So in our eyes we just couldn't see why DP & I should hold off a decision that felt 'right' now.
Only 2 of my friends, one of my brothers and my mum know we have been trying, I didn't want the questioning from people everytime we bumped into them... 'oh, still not pregnant?!' kinda thing.
DP chose not to tell any of his family/friends as they are quite old school in thinking you SHOULD be married first etc.
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NeoshasMummy
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 9:05pm |
Well to be honest I am trying for a little boy to complete the family. Im studying to be a chartered accountant so I figure get the baby thing over now then once they r at school I can get into my career and wont need to stop to have more children. Plus I wanted a close age gap AND to have children while I am young (20) and DH wanted kids before he was 30 which is this year
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 Mrs Te Kani ❤️ Neosha 26/5/2007
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emz
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Posted: 31 March 2008 at 10:20pm |
Yeah my thing was, as you put it so well NeoshasMummy, 'get the baby thing over now' haha. I don't want to start teaching (graduated when I was 38 weeks pg) and then have to stop, I think its better for us anyway to struggle on one income than to get used to 2 and then drop. I was told by my doc to have all babies by my mid to late twenties as I may have my bits removed too. And plus I like the fact that sometimes your woman problems can get better, not worse, after having kids.
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minik8e
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Posted: 01 April 2008 at 9:07am |
Hrmm, well we are discussing coming off the pill now, and not actively trying, but seeing what happens. Haven't made a firm decision yet, but fingers crossed. If we do it that way, and nothing has happened by the end of the year then I may begin charting and if nothing within 6 months after that, off to the doc we will go.....
Now just to make the firm decision!!
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IVFGirl1111
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Posted: 01 April 2008 at 9:46am |
We STILL cant make the decision and we have been talking about it for over 2 years on and off!
Lol, you know what Im like so I am NO advice!
All I'll say is please dont be like me and do actually make a decision and stick to it soon! haha.
So excited for you though chick, sounds like things in your life are going so great YAH
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minik8e
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Posted: 01 April 2008 at 10:12am |
Hey Dal, yeah you could say that
I think that it's true - if you have any doubts, then don't do it. I don't, and DP says he doesn't....so yeah!
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baalamb
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Posted: 01 April 2008 at 10:51am |
We didn't try for Ashlee and I don't have Endo/PCOS, but it's a really hard decision to try and make, this whole TTC thing. In our case, it's when do we decide to TTC #2. It depends on so many factors, too many to list! You've just got to weigh up the pros and cons that are specific to your situation and what your priorities are in life.
We chopped and changed our minds with #2, not knowing if we wanted a small or larger age gap between our 2, pros and cons for each, and me being undecided and feeling unhappy with what I'm doing (or not doing) work-wise. Originally we were going to TTC end of this year, but I've been feeling like it's not really 100% what I want to do, so we've decided to wait it out until I've done the things that I want to do. In saying that, I'm young enough to do so with no apparent health factors.
This hasn't given you any advice, sorry! But I just wanted to let you know that I can see where you're coming from and it's not a decision that's taken lightly. All the best!
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Maya
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Posted: 01 April 2008 at 11:01am |
I originally planned to start TTC in my mid-late 20's once I'd finished uni and had a bit of time to work, I say "I" coz Willie has kids from a previous relationship so he wasn't as invested in it as me. Of course, along came Maya at 21 so that changed everything!
Having had her so young I decided I wanted to be done with pregnancy/babies by the time I'm 30 as I don't want to spend my whole life with little babies, and I want to have a chance to work on my career once the kids are older. As it's worked out I've gotten to have babies and a career but I've been very lucky.
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 Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
  The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
 Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
 Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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minik8e
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Posted: 01 April 2008 at 11:10am |
It's quite funny, because I'm not at all concerned about my career. My employer has a fantastic parental leave scheme, and pride themselves on their family friendly conditions. I know that I will be welcomed back with open arms, and it won't hurt my career by taking parental leave because they truly value their staff and reward loyalty. Gosh that sounds OTT LOL
We are only planning on having 2, possibly 3, children with around 2 years between them, so yeah. Who knows whether that will happen however!
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minik8e
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Posted: 23 April 2008 at 2:28pm |
Just to bump this thread up for more possible opinions, and also to ask another question.....those of you who did decide to TTC, how long did it take for you to get your BFP, and was it sooner or later than you expected?
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Bel
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Posted: 23 April 2008 at 2:40pm |
Hehe - I have said this in the few threads lately - cos I have one of the lucky stories!
DH and I decided that we would start trying in January last year, we discussed it and thought it would take a while to happen. So I stopped the pill and got pregnant that first month! It was very exicitng and we were sure it would take longer...
So take heart that for some people it is easy! (a few October 07 mums would agree I am sure!)
and we are starting our journey again - I stopped taking the pill 2 weeks ago...
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Mum to two beautiful kids
Luke (09.11.2007)
Amy (01.04.2009)
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