Not allowed to see baby

I thought i'd post this here so it gets the most exposure.

My SIL had her wee girl last night, 2 weeks early after pre-eclampsia and spontanious labour. 12 hour labour, pain relief didnt work and baby came out via forcepts and not breathing. Baby is fine and has been off machines since 3am which is awesome, done her first poo and has had a feed (i think formula)

Now, the problem thats going on, is my poor SIL had super high BP and a seizure at the end of labour because she was so stressed out. Her BP was fine until the last 30 mins of labour. They have her in recovery still and will NOT let her see the baby.

I rang her this morning and she's bright as a bird, knows whats happening, feels like a spaghetti monster with all the wires and tubes and crap, but she hasnt even seen one glimpse of her lovely wee girl. They say she's not allowed to until she is calm and her BP has come down. I would have thought that holding/feeding baby would help with that, would it not? I'm quite concerned because if she gets any more stressed out, she'll have another seizure or at worst case senario a stroke.

This isnt right, is it? As far as I know (from the convo we had) theres no other issues - she's not bleeding heavy, she's been to the toilet etc. They wont even let her have a cup of tea! What can we do? I tried to assure her that if she concentrates on the fact that she'll get to see baby once she's settled down, everything will be alright, but yea.. not working.

Also, has anyone got a recipe for those cookies that help with BF? Baby was 2 weeks early and because she hasnt been able to feed her herself, she's worried she's going to have problems. Thought I might bake her some tasty treats to help!

TIA! xox

It just seems odd to me.. you think that letting her see the baby would help settle her down.
Ive just seen a pic of her and man she's lovely!!!

I know its hard I was in a similar situation to your SIL with my DS having to be apart from me initially but it sounds like she has alot more medical issues.

It is tough at the time but the rules are to protect both your SIL, baby and the staff. If your SIL were to visit baby in a NICU ward and have a seizure the nurses there would not have the experience or equipment to deal with it.

DH did the skin to skin with DS, hes a real daddys boy which DH attributes back to this

She should get support with BF, I hope she does not put to much pressure on herself as I did ( not good for your blood pressure) I was freaking out as my milk was not coming in and was not until about day 5 a lactaction consultant told me if medical stuff is going on with the mum or you have alot of oedema the milk is slower to come in. It didn't happen for me until day 6/7.

Sounds like baby is doing well so hopefully they will be all together soon.

Bizzy, I'm assuming the baby is in an incubator in NICU. Transporting that and the accompanying equipment might not be a simple task.

If I were her I would definitely be asking more questions to different people, but at the same time, I have to assume doctors/midwives do things for valid reasons.

Edited by tishy

Okay thinking outside of the box here but is it possible to have a video camera to go in and for her to see baby that way perhaps?

I must say this would have been really hard for me as there is no way my bp would have gone down while not being able to see my baby for my own eyes.

Is the baby on the regular postnatal ward being looked after by Dad then? If I was him I would be wrapping the baby up and appearing wherever Mum is!!!

It all sounds a bit strange to me... Your poor SIL - that must be really awful. With all the fuss about doing what the MUM wants for the baby throughout the whole pregnancy, labor, post-natal care you think they would be being a bit more PC about it!! Sounds like something that would have happened 50yrs ago!... Goodluck getting some answers xx

MissAngel, if you are as worried as you seem (and I'm pretty sure you are), then you should borrow your mum's car and go down there so that she has someone on her side as it sounds like she is all alone. If a family member is with the baby then it will be a lot harder for the doctors to say no, she can't see the baby as a lot of their reasons will be taken away from them. I also think it would be good for you to see for yourself the situation rather than from your SIL as she might not know fully what is happening so you're not getting all the information and getting upset and angry over something that might be different in reality. This might not be the same situation but as a health professional we see it all the time, patients telling their family one thing when it's really a different thing.

Man if that was me it would be RAISING my blood pressure because i'd be so angry they were keeping my own baby away from me! It sucks that they can do that. It is HER baby after all, she should have a say. I hope she gets to see her soon. That must be really hard.

Man that seems soo stone age! The poor porrw women. Like everyone has said, how on earth can she relax when she cant she her baby. Crazy!