School balls, drugs, drinking etc

NZ Herald

So the debating debate thread got me thinking and I didn't want to turn that thread into a debate about this.

Opinions please?

Considering when I had my school balls the legal drinking age was 20, and girls still got plenty drunk and puked everywhere.

My concern is over kids getting into harder drugs - weed is reasonably harmless - P on the other hand is dangerous and Ecstasy makes people look like idiots despite how they may think they appear.

The difficulty with school balls now is 18 year olds are legally entitled to drink, although I would prefer it if School Balls were alcohol and drug free its only one night

i remember as a teenager kids at parties getting drunk or stoned and there was always someone getting out of hand, I think it's mainly as most teenagers don't know the off switch, when they have had too much (although to be fair I know some people of mature years who have that problem too)

saying that I think both parents and schools need to send a consistent message as if parents provide the alcohol whilst it may be legal it doesn't exactly teach them moderation

for example my nephew is in the rugby/party drinking culture and he is 17 - my SIL complained to me at the weekend that when the boy goes to parties he only likes to drink Jack and it costs so much, so I told her that she should only buy it for him if he gives her the money, oh no apparently making him pay for his own drink would be wrong cos boys will be boys - my point is that if someone else is willing to fund his 'fun' then he is never going to learn responsibility and cause/effect

Back in the dark ages when I went to my school ball, the drinking age was 20 so while kids drank, it wasn't "the norm". There was an after party in a wool shed supervised and beer only and you could only go if the parents holding it had spoken to your parents and it was all above board.
We had a good time. I'm sure there were kids there who HAD been drinking but like I said it was the exception rather than the rule and those kids would have been the "loser" kids anyhow.
WE have a 19 y/o. He didn't drink (that we know of) before his ball in 6th form and was "excluded" from the 7th form one ss well as the after party so not an issue.
My concerns with all of it is that its not "just" beeer now - the kids seem to be drinking harder stuff now form the get go rather than "graduating" to hard booze as they get older and they also get paralytic drunk - it seems to be a "competition". We never bought him booze while he was living with us as he broke our trust after being brought home by the police legless on more than one occasion and vomiting in a taxi ($300 cost to us) another time so it was a no go. He still got it tho. Dunno where or how (we stopped the money too). Drugs is more prevalent now, we have had huge issues with weed too. The scary thing is its happening at school - in the school years - it is something niether of us were "exposed" to before we had left school and were in the workforce.
I think its sad that kids feel loiek they have to experience it all so young - and that they are in such a hurry to grow up.
I don't see WHY they need to have pre ball drinks/parties - they have their whole lives ahead of them to waer5 a pretty dress and suit and get legless...after party maybe but not "before".
I'm not a prude, nor am I old fashioned..I lived a fairly rock n roll life before I had kids IYGWIM however when I was at school I was "still a kid" and glad to be.
Am very scared for the little kids we have..the peer pressures are HUGE now compared to when I was that age. So sad.

Mum_mum wrote: High9 wrote: The thing with weed now days and back say 20 years ago is that now days dealers lace it with P to get you hooked. No use having people that don't get it regularly iygwim. And I only know this because the kids at the school I went to knew the guy who dealt and he was into both, some even helped him make it/deal it. etc. I'm pretty sure they wouldn't lace weed with P, do you know how expensive P is? I doubt they would waste their money lacing 16 year olds pot with it to be honest. They are more likely to put fly spray on the weed to make it heavier and stickier. Yip fly spray, sick!

You may be a bit surprised then. I only finished school less that 3-4 years ago and my best friend at the time was part of the cool club and her BF dealt weed/joints and they did actually lace them with P to get kids hooked rather than it being a once a week thing.

The local druggie house was also a P lab which has since been busted/closed.

And yup, they deal them in the school yard.

Agree with you Kebakat. It does come down to those things. Monkey see, monkey do, right?

But in saying that, it isn't always the case as well which sucks but we'll definitely be showing DD the 'right' way. That you don't need those things to have fun, etc.

I read an article in the local paper here about school balls. The Rector at the local boys school has addressed his students and told them what he expects them to do at the ball they include greeting him and his wife and the dress code. They will have police at the ball and will random breath test as they please.

I grew up in the age of the drinking age being 20 and was about to change to 18 (it changed 6 weeks after I turned 18) so for us drinking was around but wasn't a big thing for everyone.

I grew up in household where alcohol was visable (my dad was an alcoholic) all the time and I think maybe seeing him made me not want to go out and get smashed all the time. I did drink after a ball I went to, I didn't get smashed and I sure as hell didn't cause a problem (apart from my dates mum but that is a different story altogether), my after balls were at parents houses and totally supervised.

I personally think the lowered drinking age has made drinking at school balls a norm.

No one would dare get drunk for my school balls - you were breathtested before during and after the ball and any trace of alcohol you were kicked out or if it was after your parents called to come get you. You dont want to waste the money on tickets dress make-up etc just to be kicked out after 10min.

Its scary how really young people these days drink vodka neat to get comatose, when i was a youngster (a million years ago ) i'd take 4 cruisers to a party and that was my lot and happy with it.

About buying your kids drinks - my parents worked on the philosophy if they didnt buy it, we'd get it from someone dodgy so they'd get us a 4 or 6 pack and that was it. Probably wouldnt go far with todays teenagers though since they're mental and all.

they didn't have RTD's when I was a teen - and I lived in a dry suburb - could only buy fortified wine

Oh, jazzy, i wasnt saying you should have done this, i was more commenting on what was done to me - im not a big drinker so i was all good with my 4 little rtds...now my brother would take his 6 pack and then drink whatever else was on offer as well.

There always seems to be a dad who makes home-brew spirits too, has anyone else noticded that? My brother had a friend who died as his friend swapped him a bottle of home brew bourbon for a ride home and he drank the lot. They were camping, too far away to get help and everyone was too drunk to notice he'd gone and passed out in his tent anyway.