School balls, drugs, drinking etc
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Topic: School balls, drugs, drinking etc
Posted By: HoneybunsMa
Subject: School balls, drugs, drinking etc
Date Posted: 20 June 2011 at 3:55pm
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http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=10733204 - NZ Herald
So the debating debate thread got me thinking and I didn't want to turn that thread into a debate about this. Opinions please? ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 20 June 2011 at 4:34pm
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I'm 20, and I had no idea and still have no idea what my friends were taking drug wise other than weed, did hear talks of kids at school taking P though. Anyway as a result of everyone around me drinking to get drunk, I never drank to get drunk. Alcohol for me growing up was never kept secret, was always done with a meal or on a special occasion so I never had this desire to go out and get drunk and I hope my DD is similar. My mum was a 'wild party animal' which is funny when you look at her now but once she had me she completely changed - hence why I am the way I am most likely.
It actually scares me - people's attitudes I mean. Just recently there was a car accident on our street and the people were drunk and stoned and one was left dead but the others that survived got out of the car and were wanting a drink and saying woah that was close, needa get stoned, etc. Often it doesn't affect someone until something bad happens to someone close to them but it just seems that people seem to think they're invincible and nothing will ever happen to them. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 20 June 2011 at 5:02pm
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Considering when I had my school balls the legal drinking age was 20, and girls still got plenty drunk and puked everywhere.
My concern is over kids getting into harder drugs - weed is reasonably harmless - P on the other hand is dangerous and Ecstasy makes people look like idiots despite how they may think they appear. The difficulty with school balls now is 18 year olds are legally entitled to drink, although I would prefer it if School Balls were alcohol and drug free its only one night ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 20 June 2011 at 5:49pm
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The thing with weed now days and back say 20 years ago is that now days dealers lace it with P to get you hooked. No use having people that don't get it regularly iygwim. And I only know this because the kids at the school I went to knew the guy who dealt and he was into both, some even helped him make it/deal it. etc.
I agree it's only one night. It's all very well having a few drinks before you go but drinking on an empty stomach is asking for trouble as well. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: choco69
Date Posted: 20 June 2011 at 7:09pm
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i remember as a teenager kids at parties getting drunk or stoned and there was always someone getting out of hand, I think it's mainly as most teenagers don't know the off switch, when they have had too much (although to be fair I know some people of mature years who have that problem too)
saying that I think both parents and schools need to send a consistent message as if parents provide the alcohol whilst it may be legal it doesn't exactly teach them moderation for example my nephew is in the rugby/party drinking culture and he is 17 - my SIL complained to me at the weekend that when the boy goes to parties he only likes to drink Jack and it costs so much, so I told her that she should only buy it for him if he gives her the money, oh no apparently making him pay for his own drink would be wrong cos boys will be boys - my point is that if someone else is willing to fund his 'fun' then he is never going to learn responsibility and cause/effect ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: Mum_mum
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 9:18am
I'm pretty sure they wouldn't lace weed with P, do you know how expensive P is? I doubt they would waste their money lacing 16 year olds pot with it to be honest. They are more likely to put fly spray on the weed to make it heavier and stickier. Yip fly spray, sick! As for the orginal post, we all drank beforehand, there was always those girls that got thrown out for vomitting etc (and this happened at the local club dances as well at like 14-15) but drugs didn't enter the scene till after we left school. I do really worry about my kids growing up and only hope they don't do the same things I did as a teenager. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
 Angel baby - May 2008
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High9 wrote:Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 10:52am
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Back in the dark ages when I went to my school ball, the drinking age was 20 so while kids drank, it wasn't "the norm". There was an after party in a wool shed supervised and beer only and you could only go if the parents holding it had spoken to your parents and it was all above board.
We had a good time. I'm sure there were kids there who HAD been drinking but like I said it was the exception rather than the rule and those kids would have been the "loser" kids anyhow. WE have a 19 y/o. He didn't drink (that we know of) before his ball in 6th form and was "excluded" from the 7th form one ss well as the after party so not an issue. My concerns with all of it is that its not "just" beeer now - the kids seem to be drinking harder stuff now form the get go rather than "graduating" to hard booze as they get older and they also get paralytic drunk - it seems to be a "competition". We never bought him booze while he was living with us as he broke our trust after being brought home by the police legless on more than one occasion and vomiting in a taxi ($300 cost to us) another time so it was a no go. He still got it tho. Dunno where or how (we stopped the money too). Drugs is more prevalent now, we have had huge issues with weed too. The scary thing is its happening at school - in the school years - it is something niether of us were "exposed" to before we had left school and were in the workforce. I think its sad that kids feel loiek they have to experience it all so young - and that they are in such a hurry to grow up. I don't see WHY they need to have pre ball drinks/parties - they have their whole lives ahead of them to waer5 a pretty dress and suit and get legless...after party maybe but not "before". I'm not a prude, nor am I old fashioned..I lived a fairly rock n roll life before I had kids IYGWIM however when I was at school I was "still a kid" and glad to be. Am very scared for the little kids we have..the peer pressures are HUGE now compared to when I was that age. So sad.  ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 12:52pm
Couldn't agree more. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 12:54pm
You may be a bit surprised then. I only finished school less that 3-4 years ago and my best friend at the time was part of the cool club and her BF dealt weed/joints and they did actually lace them with P to get kids hooked rather than it being a once a week thing. The local druggie house was also a P lab which has since been busted/closed. And yup, they deal them in the school yard. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 2:50pm
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I may get shot for this but I think it comes down to parenting.
Growing up with the way my parent raised us I felt no need to go get drunk to have fun and had no problems saying no to alcohol. I'm still that way. In all honesty I've probably drunk about 3 bottles of wine in my life. I think parents need to take more responsibility for teaching their kids about peer pressure and how to have fun without the need to get drunk and do drugs. I had heaps of fun with friends without that stuff. I was offered drugs. I said no. I was offered beer/wine/vodka etc and said no. My brother was the same in high school and he's seen as "more normal" because he does get drunk sometimes. But didn't at that school age. |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 4:01pm
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Agree with you Kebakat. It does come down to those things. Monkey see, monkey do, right?
But in saying that, it isn't always the case as well which sucks but we'll definitely be showing DD the 'right' way. That you don't need those things to have fun, etc. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 5:12pm
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Totally agree with you kebakat.
Considering most of the pre-ball parties are at parents homes and its the parents supplying the alcohol. I won't be offering DD any alcohol till she's 18 and it would only be with a meal or on a special occasion. DH is a non-drinker and I haven't had alcohol in such a long time I consider myself the same. The Kings College Ball doesn't surprise me at all, I went to the St Kentergins School Ball when I was in 7th form and they were all into top shelf booze and we were all well underage at the time. The kids had access to money and the boys were able to get alcohol when ever they wanted. Checking for ID wasn't as strict as it is now. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 5:58pm
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I read an article in the local paper here about school balls. The Rector at the local boys school has addressed his students and told them what he expects them to do at the ball they include greeting him and his wife and the dress code. They will have police at the ball and will random breath test as they please. I grew up in the age of the drinking age being 20 and was about to change to 18 (it changed 6 weeks after I turned 18) so for us drinking was around but wasn't a big thing for everyone. I grew up in household where alcohol was visable (my dad was an alcoholic) all the time and I think maybe seeing him made me not want to go out and get smashed all the time. I did drink after a ball I went to, I didn't get smashed and I sure as hell didn't cause a problem (apart from my dates mum but that is a different story altogether), my after balls were at parents houses and totally supervised. I personally think the lowered drinking age has made drinking at school balls a norm. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 6:09pm
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I was always a tad removed from any heavy drinking at college - I had my experiments, but it was never a culture or way of life for me. In saying that, it always felt like a lot of it went on. I'm sure the stories were exaggerated, as teenagers tend to, but an awful lot of gossip focused on who'd done what completely trashed.
I think it was at it's peak in my seventh form year, and that coincided with me drifting away from my main group of friends from the previous years, mostly because we didn't have a lot in common outside school anymore. They were all about getting wrecked at any opportunity, and not only was that not really my thing, I'd met DH (not that we were going out at that point or anything) and his group of friends, who were much more my kind of people, so I preferred to do stuff with them. One thing that cracks me up is a friend who didn't take kindly to being kind of ditched (I feel a bit bad about that, but I honestly never had any fun with her anymore) saying I was 'immature' for not drinking like she did - although, like I said, I feel bad about it, I still crack up at that to this day. In saying that, I have friends now who I know drunk heavily in their teenage years, and they're great people. One of my really good friends ended up with a baby that way . So the kids drinking too much now are very likely to turn out decent 25-year-olds.
I definitely think drugs are a bigger thing now. When I was at school, it was pretty much only a hard core of seriously off-the-rails kids who did more than a bit of experimentation. -------------   
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 7:33pm
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No one would dare get drunk for my school balls - you were breathtested before during and after the ball and any trace of alcohol you were kicked out or if it was after your parents called to come get you. You dont want to waste the money on tickets dress make-up etc just to be kicked out after 10min.
Its scary how really young people these days drink vodka neat to get comatose, when i was a youngster (a million years ago  ) i'd take 4 cruisers to a party and that was my lot and happy with it.
About buying your kids drinks - my parents worked on the philosophy if they didnt buy it, we'd get it from someone dodgy so they'd get us a 4 or 6 pack and that was it. Probably wouldnt go far with todays teenagers though since they're mental and all. |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 8:09pm
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yeeeeaaah we did that Bowie...he just got more from elsewhere. Dunno where or how. *sigh* so so hard. ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 9:18pm
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they didn't have RTD's when I was a teen - and I lived in a dry suburb - could only buy fortified wine ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: blossombaby
Date Posted: 21 June 2011 at 10:34pm
My parents were the same Bowie. Brought me a 4 pack of Archers or a bottle of bernidino therefore they knew what i was drinking and how much i had to be able to drink. Out of all my friends the ones that got way too drunk way to often were the ones thats parents thought they were at a girlfriends watching dvds, didnt buy their booze of course. But they managed to get some often from their parents supplys!! My parents were always open about drinking and we worked on me being honest to them about were i was etc. So the couple of times I had to ring Dad to pick me up  he knew i was drunking and what to expect .. I remember ringing a friends mum and she thought she was at a pool party at the local pools! (This was all in high school of course)
In regards to balls - most often drinks are on offer at pre balls! so the students drink there. I have been to a few balls and a couple drinking and a couple sober. I must admit balls are one of the boring things ever!! We had a lady sniff drinks at one ball and just removed any that smelt of alcohol and replaced it with fizzy .. just for people to put alcahol in again
------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 22 June 2011 at 3:37am
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Oh, jazzy, i wasnt saying you should have done this, i was more commenting on what was done to me - im not a big drinker so i was all good with my 4 little rtds...now my brother would take his 6 pack and then drink whatever else was on offer as well.
There always seems to be a dad who makes home-brew spirits too, has anyone else noticded that? My brother had a friend who died as his friend swapped him a bottle of home brew bourbon for a ride home and he drank the lot. They were camping, too far away to get help and everyone was too drunk to notice he'd gone and passed out in his tent anyway. |
Posted By: Littlechop
Date Posted: 22 June 2011 at 10:47pm
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When I was a teenager, the drinking age was 20. I didn't need to get my parents to buy me alcohol because I was buying it myself from 15! In fact, I used to buy it for all my friends too - go into the bottle store and buy a few hip flasks and bottles of cheap wine (Marque Spew ). Thank goodness they are so strict on ID now.
But before I could buy it, we used to wait outside bottle stores and always some random adult would get our bottles of Kahn or Mississippi Moonshine or whatever for us Our balls always involved drinks before hand at someones house (with parental supervision) and many more drinks at the afterball. It was very usual for me and my friends to drink to excess and get legless (not just at balls - we were drunk most weekends). I am certainly hoping that we can teach my step son and our daughters better attitudes toward alcohol. There were lots of close calls at parties I went to due to people being drunk ie. a drunk girl having an asthma attack because she was put on a hammock and swung off it over and over again, a guy lying unconscious, bleeding after being hit in the head with a bottle and everyone being too drunk to notice/care, my friend fell off a balcony and fractured numerous vertebrae. We were so luckhy that there weren't any deaths. Young people and exessive alcohol are a bad, bad mix!!! I personally think the drinking age should never have been lowered to 18. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: fattykat
Date Posted: 22 June 2011 at 11:14pm
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Littlechop....blahhhh Mississippi Moonshine, made me shudder just hearing the name. That cr@p was gross!
Wonder if they still sell the stuff??? Probably not, who would buy it now there is RTDs. I never made it to a school ball....I left before I was allowed to go, so never got to get wear a pretty dress 
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Posted By: HoneybunsMa
Date Posted: 22 June 2011 at 11:34pm
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Interesting.
I wasn't a geek at school but a bit of a loner and outsider for some reason people didn't like me and I found/find it hard to make friends. I didn't really get into drinking at school it came after but I'm not going to say I didn't know people that did. My brother ever the rebel did and his friend had a girlfriend my age who they used to take out and go drinking with. I remember going to his and his bestfriends bday (born same day a year apart) and having a few wines from a cask BLURGH and my brothers girlfriend at the time going are you ok, are you sober, are your parents going to get angry? LOL ummm I had less to drink then her and she was tiny.
I met DP in his 7th form year at school and I know he drank at his afterball I was there a friend of his came up and took him aside. What I didn't know was that he was likely stoned, I think by that stage he had stopped doing other drugs too. I believe if that a child/adolescent has a hobby, a sport or something then they are less likely to go off the rails, because of that sense of achievement. I do know that as a teen that the weed that went round a couple of times got laced with flyspray... P wasn't really around in my teens. A few people dropped ekkies but not in my circle that I was aware of. TBH the whole drinking drug thing came later for me. Never done much more than drink however and never even had a drag of a cigarette. I was the I'm not going to do it because its cool girl lol. I aim to raise DD with much the same upbringing I had and just be open with her. We pretty much were able to do what we wanted because our parents generally knew where we were and who we were with we never had curfews. Besides DP works hospitality and is round drugs alot and knows the signs in people pretty quickly and how to counteract it. I do too just not to the same extent ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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