What would you say?

A year ago we sold our house and have put the money into investments while we rent and save for another home. 5 months ago we lent money to my bro and SIL to buy a car. They made payments for a month and then nothing. They were having a hard time finding work so we let it ride for a while. A month ago we sold a vehicle we jointly owned and they use the money to pay the arrears and a month in advance.

This week the payments are due again. I'm not sure we will get anything. If it was as simple as neither of them having work that would be fine but...

-my neice is in day at a cost of $5o per two days a week, despite one parent not working and other working part time. (this would more than cover the loan repayments).
-SIL is doing regular sessions at gym with a person trainer.
-SIl flew away for a weekend away with friends this weekend.

I feel worried that they will say that they can't pay us, when as I see its just because they are making other choices. We don't need the money for day to day living, but its to contribute towards or future. What can i say to them? I'm worried I'll lose it and ruin the relationship completely, but I feel like we are being taken for ride and it sucks that its family doing it.

Any ideas? DH wants to post a letter with a deposit slip as a reminder.

If you have made an arrangement of how much is to be paid back & the frequency of payments then I think it is best to wait as there is not any arrears now. If they don't make this weeks payment call them & tell them you are sending a direct debit form & they can pay weekly (if they don't already).

I would tell them if they are having trouble paying it back that you can help them do a budget & maybe put on hold some of the not so unessential things. Make them understand the loan is up there with rent etc.

It must be a hard situation, but at the end of the day you have to look at it like it was a loan & they knew that & agreed to it. It is your money for a house, you are not getting interest on it (?) & it causes unease & uncertainty.

Bizzy wrote: they are taking you for a ride! if they dont make the payment then give them an ap form and tell them you want your money back!

^^ This

But I'd also makeit clear to them it needs to be treated like a loan and just because you are family doesn't mean you'll take a backseat IYGWIM ? Because they borrowed off you they may think it's a flexible arrangement.

No ideas sorry, just to let you know you're not alone- my sister got a flexirent in DH's name for camera & computer to do a photography course which she hasn't done, she often missed her AP's so we had to pay, didn't want bad credit. Almost 3y later it's still in DH's name, mum has taken over the debt, the ap's & the Apple, & my sister has walked away from everything with a (Canon Digital SLR) camera & not a care, no thanks, no apology, we feel like schmucks. Lesson learnt though.