Am i being fair..?

Ive had lots of issues with my MIL and for good reason but one of the things she likes to do is invite us over while shes really sick (without mentioning it) or turning up unannounced when shes really sick. She will also say shes better and then when she turns up she is far from it!

Whenever she does this i ask her politely to keep her distance from DD but she never listens and goes up to her blowing rasberrys in her face/kissing her etc etc. This is the reason for 90% of the bugs DD has had since she was born - the first one she gave her when she was only 2weeks old and lasted 6 weeks. Grr

I just found out an hour ago shes now become extreamly sick with swine flu. Ive told her that she is not to come anywhere near DD (or i) without presenting a medical certificate saying she is better first.

Is this fair? I feel it is with the way she acts every time but ofcourse DP and MIL are telling me im being OTT.

If it was a common cold it wouldnt matter so much but swine flu is not something i want to risk!

are you sure its swine flu?   

I don't think there's anything wrong with wanting to make sure she is clear of the bug before she comes over again.

Honestly I don't understand what is wrong with some people - my friend was visited at the hospital when she had her baby, by a friend who took along her mump infested child. Who does that!!

Yup its swine flu. She said her doctor did tests and shes ment to stay home and not go anywhere (emphasis on ment because i know she wont if she can get away with it)

It is 100% fair. I often don't go and see the in-laws if they are sick and if just one of them is sick they know not to go near my son. Also even when well I asked them to wash their hands before holding him when he was newborn - and my MIL and niece still do that to this day, which I appreciate very much. They respect my wishes, and I think anyone should respect the wishes of a parent.

If anyone had the swine flu I wouldn't go near them nor let anyone in my family go near them until they had the all-clear blood test result.

I don't think you're being unreasonable Ricker, she certainly doesn't seem to be supportive of you. I'd be annoyed too if she came around when sick, especially with something as bad as swine flu.

Stick to your guns

I wouldn't visit or have someone with swine flu visit ME let alone visit Jude. Flu is horrible whether "normal" flu or swine flu. A common cold is a completely different matter.

I went to my great great aunties 103rd birthday the other week which was held at the rest home. Someone had bought their little girl who had chicken pox - now I don't mind if Jude gets chicken pox at this age as his immune system should be developed enough to handle it at this age. However, chicken pox is HORRIBLE to have as an adult- if one of the older persons at the home had not had chicken pox before and was infected, they could get very very sick. I thought it was rather strange that they hadnt thought of that.

That's just me though. I'm usually all about exposing Jude (and myself) to bugs and germs in small doses and don't use hand sanitiser or anti-bacterial soap as I believe that a few germs are good for the immune system. However, I would definitely not deliberately expose Jude or myself to someone infected with something like swine flu or measles (as he hasn't been vaccinated for it yet).

You are so totally in the right Ricker!!!!! I couldn't even imagine why your MIL or anyone else would want to risk giving Swine flu or anything serious to anyone else.

Hope she listens to your requests and stays away!!! And that it doesn't cause anymore issues between you and DP!!!

I think you are doing the right thing by being firm with her and your partner should be supporting you in this stand.

How would they feel if your baby got sick and ended up in hospital.. that flu is a killer, so they should totally be understanding to your stand.

Stay strong!!!

Hell If she turned up at your place I wouldnt' even open the door to talk to her!