More children question

My DH & I have been discussing this & he posed an interesting question to me today.

"Why do we want more children"

I can give all the excuses under the sun why not to, but when it's the opposite I can't really come up with much.

So I'm wondering why people decided to have more children.

This is really about not going from 1 to 2 children but the 2 children to 3 or more.

LOL we are going to be trying for puppies again soon (my dog ) so maybe they can be substitute pregnancies/babies , not sure if DH would see it that way.

I was so not a babies & child person before I got pregnant with Alia which is why it totally surprises me that there is the possibility of 3.

My mum loved babies, I'm pretty sure breeding dogs was her substitute for the babies she couldn't have.

It seems to me going from 3-4 or more isn't that bigger challenge, but going from 2-3 is. As so much of how we live is geared around having 2.
Housing, cars are mostly designed for families of 4, adding a 5th member is when the logistics get more tricky.

My Mum loved having kids....... I'm one of 6..... and she would have had more but my youngest brother was born when she was 44 and she had some issues so had to have a hysterectomy (sp?) which really upset her. I've always grown up wanting a big family.. not quite 6 kids but maybe 3-4. DF is also from a big family - he is one of 5. Now we have Isla tho, we are thinking we might only have one more. Simply because when a 3rd child is brought into the picture.... so many things have to change... have to get bigger car, bigger house etc etc. Plus DF is Irish so we travel to Ireland every few years. With 2 kids, it will be easy.... having a 3rd might get a bit tricky tho! So at this stage, 2 will be our lot but I'd say when #2 comes along I'll be thinking about #3..... we'll just have to wait and see

And we planned our financial situation right from the beginning to accommodate 5 kids, which has meant a lot of compromise for us (i.e DH & I, not the kids) but we don't regret it. You both have to agree though! That's really important! DH would like more but he's realising it's not realistic.

Lol, & when you're already looking after kids your pregnancy flies by! I've never really enjoyed being pregnant (this is my tenth pregnancy) but it's for such a short time in the long term picture. I agree, definitely not a deal breaker!

We went for the mellow approach Kel. We started not trying but not preventing about 3 months ago and bam! He just had to look at me and I got pregnant lol

Edited by lisa85

kiwisj wrote: I have always wanted 4 kids, I'm one of 3. DH is one of 2 and can't see why you'd want more But we have agreed to talk about it again once we've had #2 and see how we feel. At this stage, I feel like our family won't be complete with 2 kids, I will always long for at least one more if we stop. DH's argument is that he wants to retire young and be able to give our kids a good education etc etc

Almost word for word how our discussions went before Tyler haha I'm one of 3 and DPs one of2 as well! Uhm well we're def planning on TTC #3 next year and DP is 50/50 on #4 but def open to the idea!

When DP asked me why I wanted more when I was preg with Tyler I had to really think about it. I've had family tell me not to throw my life away on kids, 2 is easier than 3 or 4, we'll struggle, etc etc. In the end though I realised that for ME none of that mattered. I have the privilege of watching the most wonderful people on the planet grow and develop and that trumps travelling the world when I'm an empty-nester or having an expensive house or whatever. Lots of people we know have had opinions on how big our family should be (interfering bunch ) and I was thinking about their arguments and I just knew that I wouldn't miss all that stuff that they thought I should prioritise but I already miss these people that I haven't even met yet!! Mushy I know but I do feel that way. Not so applicable to you I guess but yeah I want more kids, I can imagine them playing and laughing and growing and I miss them even though they aren't here and 'll get far more joy out of my children than I will out of the things I could possibly do if I didn't have them - specially since theres no guarantee I could do those things anyway!

LMAO what a novel... sorry still trying to formulate a good 'shut-up' answer to the busybodys!!

I thought I might have a few fairly close in age, not quite as close as I have now, but then I didnt want to start as late as I did either... think I will see how I go with having 2 close in age then think about another, I love being a mum and would like a boy also.

I come from a decent sized family on both sides (4 on mums side & 5 on dads side) and my partner has 3 siblings. My mum comes from a family of 8, but thats because they didn't have a tv hehe

Huge congrats lisa Great minds think alike