Did i do the right thing or make it worse

Kobe threw a huge tantrum this morning. started off at weight watchers meeting which was pretty boring for him and he was good there but when he started getting bored we left and went to get the groceries. He started just being naughty and not listening, throwing things in the trolley, breaking peices of my cauliflower off and throwing it on the ground apparently to 'feed the parrot'????? then he wanted a chocolate bar and I said no because he hadnt listened to me but if he was good he could still have a ride (one of those ride on things) on the way out to the car. But no he started crying and trying to put the chocolate on the counter etc... but i left without it and with a screaming child. told him he had better stop or no ride but he didnt so when we had to pass the ride I wouldnt give him one and he screamed louder. Had to pack my groceries by the car and he was still going to town, almost pulled my pants down trying to get me back inside for a ride so i put him in the car and he kept screaming and banging on the windows. got the groceries in and him finally in his seat in the front and drove off, then he started turning round in his seat so i told him he had to sit down or he had to go in the back because it was dangerous but no wouldnt listen, gave him heaps of warning and then pulled over. A bit of a tussle and trying ot get him into his seat and the seatbelt done up, threw the spare booster in the boot so it wasnt an option to go in the front and finally got the seatbelt done up again and off we go. He finally calmed down just little sobs which I must admit broke my heart even though i was so mad at him. So my question after this long ramble is, did I do the right thing by following through or did I just make it worse. Should i maybe have given in on either the ride or the chocolate cos at the moment I feel like he didnt get anything except a grumpy mummy and a horrible outing and Im feeling pretty bad about it but then if i give in doesnt that mean he knows what to do for me to back down next time?

Edited by my2angels

oh no - you let your child scream instead of giving him the chocolate... good on you.!!! it can be hard but you most def did the right thing.
giving in is the easy option, but only temporarily.

you did the right thing

You definitely did the right thing. As hard as it was for you, he will now start learning that what mum says goes and that there a consequences for not listening. You are doing him a favour by setting boundaries and he will appreciate it in the years to come. Well done!

Think of it this way... he'll never have a (good) life when he's older unless he learns this lesson.... nice mummy!

Totally agree with everyone else. You did the right thing in not giving in. Kids really need consistancy (sp) so they dont get confused messages eg: you saying no till hes screaming then you giving in, he learns that he can scream for as long as it takes and he'll get it... Good on you for being strong, it can be soooo hard esp when ppl are looking at you when it all turns to custard in public

You did the right thing. If you say something you need to follow through. Like some of the other ladies said... If you gave in next time it will just be worse and he knows sooner or later you will give in so just scream louder and harder.

i feel so much better now thank you all. We had a pretty good afternoon and we went to play with his wee friend so it wasnt a totally bad day and I have been a lot firmer with him than i normally would and he has actually listened....most of the time but its a start. Funny though cos i always thought i was hard on him and that hubby and i were on the same page with that sort of thing until recently hubby pointed out i was too soft.
And about the public thing, normally I just pretend i dont notice them looking but today when i pulled over it happened to be right outside a park where people were playing cricket so was rather embarassing plus as we stood there staring at each other on the footpath the thought to do im leaving and pretend to drive off crossed my mind i must admit but a)couldnt leave my baby standing there crying and thinking i was actually leaving and b)i wondered how long it would take for someone to see him standing there and ring CYPS or something on me!

Edited by my2angels

Hey I'm a bit late Robyn but I agree with the general consensus, you did a great job sticking with it - even though it is heartbreaking, we have the same tantrums with Ashlyn and it is soooo hard but teaching them this lesson is so important.

I agree, you did great!
It is so hard to be consistent and follow through sometimes, especially when they really go to town in public but so much better in the long run.
Way to go Robyn