Giving Birth in NZ

Hi All, I am due to have my 3rd baby in January and have been getting really anxious about the birth. My first two babies were born in Australia where we don't have the Midwife system that's available here.

Consequently, you end up with shared care between your GP and the hospital for major appointments (maybe 3 throughout the pregnancy). When you go into labour, you go to hospital and it's pot luck as to who you end up with as a midwife. I had never seen the midwives who delivered my first two boys prior to getting into hospital. With the first, I was induced and told that it would be a while, my husband was sent home and I stayed on the ward. At 2.30am contractions started and they wheeled me round to a delivery room and closed the door. The pain was not great, being left alone was not great and having a cranky mid wife come in to tell me off for making too much noise was also not great. They wouldn't get my husband in, nobody stayed with me, it was HORRIBLE At 6am they did a change of shift, a much nicer nurse came in and it was all systems go, baby was born at 7am.

The second was born with labour lasting a total of 4 hours; we basically just got to the hospital in time for the birth, but once again no midwife there for the duration as they need to manage the whole labour ward- they pop in and out to monitor and then stay for the delivery before sending you off to your room and you never see them again.

It's so much better here! But I am still really anxious after bad experiences... I just want the next 5 1/2 weeks to hurry up!! Maybe someone has a great story and can reassure me?

Thanks Sarahm for your thoughts- my midwife keeps reassuring me it will be ok and no one will leave me to battle it out on my own this time.....still scared though!

I have had two hospital births and while my sons birth was not the best experience (due to him going into distress etc I won't go into detail) the hospital staff were simply amazing and I could not have asked for better care.

I changed MW's with DD and the whole pregnancy, labour and birth was fantastic - I got my VBAC with full support of my MW and the hospital staff and MW's on the maternity ward were all lovely.

All the very, very best - I hope the weeks fly past and you get the care you deserve this time!

I hope all Kiwi women realise how lucky they are in comparison to other countries! My MW has been great so far, wish I could shake the anxiety.

Thanks for the kind wishes
xxx

A little off topic as I gave birth at home...

But the I called the MW at 3.30pm when my waters broke, she ended coming out home to check and make sure I was ok at 7pm... She said to call if I was worried or the contractions were getting pretty bad.

We rang her at 10pm, she listend to a contraction on the phone, then said she'd shower & come round. She arrived at 11pm, and honestly made me feel so calm it was great. Because we had Lucan at home my second MW was called at 1am (they have to have 2 MWs present at a home birth) - they were both right next to me the whole way through. Bubs head got stuck coming out so they 'bullied' me into doing more pushing (which they both apologised for!)... but honestly other than the fact that DH was my supporting rock - they were AMAZING.

As long as you have a good relationship with your MW you will be fine, EVERYONE I know has had their MW right by their side from the moment they have asked them to be there (within reason - they wont hang round at 3am just because your waters have broken ) and they follow your requests and make sure you are as comfortable as you can be.

To the point mine helped me out of my shower afterwards, put my undies on, then while I was feeding Lucan she fed me dinner!

Mine never left my side from the time I got to hospital - and had visited me at home before we went in too. You'll have a very different experience this time. GOOD LUCK!

Thanks for your comments everyone! With that and the Rescue Remedy, I am definitely feeling somewhat calmer

We were only at the birthing centre for a short time before bubs was born, but my MW (well, actually my backup MW) was there for most of that, she got there shortly after us so we had the staff MW - who was lovely - for a wee while. I didn't think it was usual for the MW to hand round the whole time if you were there longer, though? I know a friend's didn't, and if my labour's anything like last time I'd be completely happy for my MW not to this time.

In saying that, it's obviously a cause of anxiety for you, and one you've discussed with her - and if she assures you she'll stay with you, I'm 100% sure that she will!!

I know what you mean, crafty1. With Jacob, DH didn't know I was in labour when he went to bed (I didn't want to get his hopes up in case it all stopped), and I didn't wake him till 4.30ish, I think - it suited me in the early stages just to just do it myself.

On the other hand, I can only imagine how scary it would be to be in a strange place wanting your DH - or SOMEONE - there and not having it No wonder you didn't enjoy the experience MaisonLuxe.

My midwife was great. Unfortunately I had to be induced and the hospital managed most of it and my midwife came back when it was established and as far as I remember never left my side. She did pop in and see me both days though before she was called back for the labour - she had other births happening. I found the hospital midwives a bit hit and miss, some were lovely, some just rubbed me the wrong way. They were all great when my son got into distress, and he safely arrived by emergency C-section. I credit my midwife and the senior staff making the decisions when they had to, to ensure he got here ok. My midwife was very good about listening to me too when I said I did not want to labour on my back and could I be on my hands and knees, I think being on my back was putting more pressure on him, and this seemed to show in the monitoring they were doing of his heartbeat.
Ok so my story isn't perfect, but the point of it is, if you trust your midwife that is really important and they are there to be your advocate. They should be honest with you when intevention needs to be done, other than that they should go along with what works for you.
By the way Rescue Remedy is great stuff, use it for all types of stressful situations, funerals, speeches etc
Hope it all goes well for you.