Problems with the Grandmother

It's hardly organisation!!!! It's more like running on overload, sometimes when i just sit for a moment i feel like i should maybe go get my blood pressure checked because something just doesn't feel right. If baby goes down for the night at 6pm, I'm working from about then till 2am, plus or minus a few hours depending on how long her sleeps were during the day and how much work i managed to get done. Just been alot harder this past few weeks now she's started teething and so restless.

I agree with Mazzy - she has basically said what I was thinking as I read and re-read all of the posts so far.

You said it yourself - you don't want your daughter asking difficult questions when she is old enough to know what is going on, so why stay in that kind of environment?

Re your mum, it might be what she needs too - to snap out of the 'smothering' cycle.

Big hugs hun and best of luck!

i too agree with mazzy...

i was going to suggest the exact same things as her.

you do need to step up to her and say NO! sure she will be upset and hurt for a while but she will get over it. and so long as you are not nasty to your mum and simply state it as it is it will work out. If the car seat isnt right, fix it... if she leaves bub on the bed, move her... if she gives her chips in front of you after you said no then take it off her...
ASSERT YOURSELF! go on you can do it!!!!

Change the locks on him ad cut the tv/playstation power cables!!!! Hell if that was my DP he woulda had a huge boot up the ass then again he would never do that because he knows how fired up i would get. If your partners name isnt on the lease i dont see why the cops cant remove him. Your a very patient person i would have totally flipped at him and threatened to remove an appendage if i had reason to think my partner was cheating!! I just told him how your partner is and he wants to chase him out of your house he is that annoyed someone would act like that. You know you dont love him its obvious in how you speak so cancel everything he has under your name change the locks and hassle the cops for a restraining order (and i mean constantly hassle them because otherwise they will do nothing) Without him you can get assistance to cover rent and stuff.

As for you mother i woulda blown my stack at her also (god i sound like an angry person im not really just when i need to be) Your mother really wants to be apart of your daughters life so i think if you made her realise its your way or the highway like some of the others have said she will come around eventually (it might take a few go's but she will learn).   

Dunno if your for or against but can you put your child in daycare for a few hours even just one day a week and maybe build it up to more so you can work without your mother and child at home?

Sorry to sound so blunt and angry but i wouldnt stand for any of that behavior around me and wouldnt treat anyone that way either. I just hate that you have to live with all that crap in your life when you dont need it. Take a stand, move on and make a better environment for yourself and kid(s)