Toddlers and seatbelts
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: Toddler Times
Forum Description: Is bubs growing up and getting into everything? How do you train them to use the potty? When do you start feeding solids? Share your tips and advice here!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=7629
Printed Date: 04 July 2025 at 11:41pm
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Topic: Toddlers and seatbelts
Posted By: jdjzmum
Subject: Toddlers and seatbelts
Date Posted: 18 May 2007 at 4:18pm
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Yesterday whilst driving home with Jack (almost 3yrs) and Maren (nearly 5mths), I glanced in the front mirror and to my absolute horror, Jack was out of his 5 point harness and standing in his carseat. I just about sh*t myself and totally lost the plot with him and shouted at him that I was going to stop and smack him for getting out of the seatbelt. He knows he has to have it on for safety reasons. Yes, I feel like the world's biggest, crueliest mother on earth that I smacked my child but I was angry and also shaking. How does one justify this if I have a visit from the police cos someone saw me smack my child? How would others deal with this situation? Obviously I didn't handle the situation properly. Please, if you have any advice, comments or otherwise, share it with me, don't be shy cos I won't be offended, I'll take on board any critisisms have, advice whatever. Thanks, Gaye |
hi ladies and dads, I need all the help and advice you can give me.
Replies:
Posted By: caraMel
Date Posted: 18 May 2007 at 4:54pm
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My niece was an absolute horror for doing this when she moved into her booster. My mum was always having to pull over suddenly to tell her off and put her back in the seat.
Hopefully seeing you that upset and angry about it (completely understandable btw) will have shocked him out of doing it again. With my niece, we got my friend who works as a police officer to come and visit her in uniform. He had a friendly talk to her about safety and how she had to keep it on so that Grandma and Daddy didn't get into trouble because she wasn't wearing it. We also taught her the words to the Macdonalds song and sing it in the car a lot. (Click goes your seat belt click click click) Don't be too hard on yourself Gaye, its so easy to react like that when our kids scare the bejesus out of us by doing something dangerous. 
Also, I'd give him a cuddle and talk about what happened so that he remembers what he did wrong as well as the smack. ------------- Mel, Mummy to E: 6, B: 4 and: 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 18 May 2007 at 5:13pm
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ok - so not sure what you want help with. the seatblet issue or the fact you think the police may come to talk to you about smacking your child.?
gabriel can get his arms out of his harness but knows to put them back in if i tell him to. i have on occasion stopped the car and told him we dont move till the seatbelt is on again. he soesnt seem to like the idea of being in the car and not going anywhere. |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 18 May 2007 at 5:16pm
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You did what you had to do... hopefully he won't do it again.
And I very much doubt the police are going to come round. |
Posted By: BaAsKa
Date Posted: 18 May 2007 at 5:48pm
| Iv smacked Bay for getting out of his seat belt a few times and to be honest i dont feel bad as i would much rather he learn that it hurts to take it off cos mumma will smack rather than learn the hard way in the event of an accident. We ended up getting him a booster seat that has so many damb straps and clips!! that he just gives up and cant be bothered anymore! lol |
Posted By: aimeejoy
Date Posted: 18 May 2007 at 8:01pm
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I know theres all this anti-smacking stuff around at the moment, but to be honest I think you did what I would do. Have you read Toddler Taming? His ideas around smacking are that the only times it is appropriate is when they have done something dangerous - if you only smack then, they know you mean it and may remember the consequence. Not sure about the actual seatbelt thing tho as we haven't encountered it yet. Dont beat yourself up about it, you did what you did cos you love your kids and dont want anything to happen to them. ------------- Aimee Hannah 22/10/05 Greer 11/02/08 |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 18 May 2007 at 8:24pm
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I think you did well, the follow-up cuddle sounds good too - not because you feel bad, but as a reassurance that what he did wasn't right but you still love him anyway.
As for all the new laws and stuff, you won't get the Police knocking at your door for something like that. -------------  |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 1:41pm
I agree. Maya went thru a stage where she kept getting out of her seatbelt and I smacked her which seemed to get the message across pretty promptly. Do you think maybe a booster seat would work better with Jack? I know it's easier to get out of, but maybe the thought of being in a big boys carseat (and of having to go back in a baby carseat if he plays up) might be good motivation to keep him sitting down. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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aimeejoy wrote:Posted By: tashzmum
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 1:52pm
tash does this, she did it one day on the way home from hamilton and she though it would be a great idea to stand up and wave to the cop following us . i quickly pulled over and put her back in, she has gotten a light smack for it but she just doesnt get the message.
i would say u coped with it very well. the first time tash did it i fully freaked out. someone told me if there is no one following u tap the breaks not to hard but enough to give them a bit of a shock and it has worked with tash a few times but its not very often i dont have someone following me. i also pull over and i refuse to move until she is back in. sometime i have sat on the side of the road for up to half a hour(i sat there reading a magazine) before she would put her arms back in. and i dont like to have the straps to tight as i dont wanna hurt her. ------------- Natasha Jayde, 1-01-05(7lb3oz) Caroline Elisabeth, 9-04-08 (4lb15oz) Izabella Kate, 9-04-08(6lb7oz) Lexi Brenna, 23-01--2011(6lb6oz) |
Posted By: Anna
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 1:58pm
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Quinn undid his seatbelt once while I was driving, and seeing me absolutely lose the plot and growl at him obviously scared him enough and he has not done it again.
------------- Anna http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 2:12pm
| you can get those extra seat belt things (not explaining very well i know) that you attach to the existing one up from the buckle and that would stop them getting their arms out. if he managed to get out completely maybe it needs adjusting. |
Posted By: jdjzmum
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 2:25pm
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Hey to all of u who have replied so far, thanks so much for sharing your experiences, ideas and support. I'm not going as crazy as I felt I was. I told Vince about what happened when I got home and he said he would have done the exact same thing I did, but I still felt awful. Makes me paranoid now everytime I put him in the car, what stunt is he going to pull on me this time. My oldest son Daniel played with the seatbelt on the Auckland motorway once and swung it around cracking up laughing, Vince caught him in the act, pulled over to the side of the road, smacked him, expalined to him what he did wrong, Daniel cried, he calmed down, gave him a hug and all was forgiven but he never did it again, but Jack just doesn't listen or learn. We've sung the Make it Click song over and over again to him to no avail, I have read the Toddler Taming book (thanks for that advice) but he may just learn the hardway (and I have no problem pulling over for 1/2 hr to read or feed the baby!!!!) until he gets the message. So, thanks again!!! Gaye ------------- Gaye  
 
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Posted By: tashzmum
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 2:34pm
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i hope your wee man gets the message. i always have a good stash of magazines in the car that i pull over and read if tash gets out of her straps.or tash has started refusing to get into her seat. she archs her back and stiffens up so she is rock solid and u cannot get her into her seat, so i just get in my seat and read until she decided to get into hers. hopefully things will get better when she moves into a new seat... ------------- Natasha Jayde, 1-01-05(7lb3oz) Caroline Elisabeth, 9-04-08 (4lb15oz) Izabella Kate, 9-04-08(6lb7oz) Lexi Brenna, 23-01--2011(6lb6oz) |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 2:36pm
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jdjz... copy and paste this into your signature instead of what you've got - Take out the space before IMG though.
[ IMG]http://www.tickercentral.com/view/8bpd/1.png[/IMG] Cute choice btw!  ------------- |
Posted By: jdjzmum
Date Posted: 21 May 2007 at 3:49pm
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cheers for that Busy Mum!!!! ------------- Gaye
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Posted By: bumblefoot
Date Posted: 23 May 2007 at 11:37pm
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A good tip for kiddies that arch their backs when you go to put them in their seats is to tickle their tummies, which by the very nature makes them hunch over so you can whip their belts on. And there arent may kids that can resist a good tickle, it keeps the mood light, and can help stem the frustration of a wiggly kiddy. Re the escaping the seatbelt while driving, I can understand the fright it must have given you, and I think your reaction was perfectly ok. I would have done the same thing, I cant imagine how scary that must have been. I hope this helps in any way! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: nuttymama
Date Posted: 24 May 2007 at 6:41am
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I would have done the same thing so don't feel bad. I don't know what sort of seat you have but, Abby has been trying to undo hers so we turned the bottom bit around so that the release button is facing her instead of out and now she has lost interest as it is too hard!! Although I guess there is still the top clip to worry about in the future. I hope he has learnt his lesson and never does it again that must have been freaky!! ------------- Abigail 06/01/2005 Jayden 21/11/2001 Micheal 03/04/1997 |
Posted By: tashzmum
Date Posted: 24 May 2007 at 11:26am
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ohh thanks for the tip regarding kids arching their backs-i never thought of tickling!!! ------------- Natasha Jayde, 1-01-05(7lb3oz) Caroline Elisabeth, 9-04-08 (4lb15oz) Izabella Kate, 9-04-08(6lb7oz) Lexi Brenna, 23-01--2011(6lb6oz) |