Coffee Catchup 23rd September - Lower Hutt
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Topic: Coffee Catchup 23rd September - Lower Hutt
Posted By: skiltz
Subject: Coffee Catchup 23rd September - Lower Hutt
Date Posted: 23 September 2013 at 11:35am
| OHbaby! Coffee Catchup - Lower Hutt 23rd September. Feel free to ask questions and Dorothy will reply when she can. |
Replies:
Posted By: TaniaTyrer116163
Date Posted: 23 September 2013 at 5:15pm
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Hi Dorothy you mentioned at the seminar this afternoon there were notes on starting solids. Can you please direct me to these notes. Thank you Tania |
Posted By: me!
Date Posted: 23 September 2013 at 9:06pm
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HI Dorothy, Thanks for your wonderful info session today. I was just seeking some clarification on my babies night time waking. He is 8 months, 9kg, is breast fed, and has 3 solid meals a day plus snacks. Up until last week he slept from 7-7, and had done this from about 16 weeks. We followed the babywise routine, which worked well for us. Over the last week or so he has started to wake at night time again. As I said today we left him for an hour this am (3.30-4.30am!) - in an attempt to teach him that night time was not a feeding time My husband did go in once to reassure him - but that seemed to make it worse. I gave in after 1 hour as my husband and I both had to go to work! You mentioned that after 3 or 4 nights of this we might break his habit- I wanted to ask you whether or not I should give in like I did this am for 3 or 4 nights, or whether you mean I need to not give in for 3 or 4 nights. I have never tried resettling him, because he has never before needed to be resettled - as a result he just expects to be fed. He is quite the stubborn baby - and I think he could cry all night if I let him, he showed no signs of slowing down after an hour! He will NOT take a bottle, so offering water is not an option. Thanks so much! |
Posted By: me!
Date Posted: 23 September 2013 at 9:26pm
| Hi Dorothy - cheeky second question - same baby - 8 months, breast fed, solids, 9kg. My son is in care with a porse carer 2x days a week whilst I work. He has been there for nearly 3 months, and refuses a bottle. He goes all day (9.5 hours) whilst he is there without a drink. We have tried formula, and expressed breast milk with no joy. I fed him for only 4 days when he was born before switching to EBM via a bottle, as I had terrible mastitis and cracked nipples. 4 weeks later I was able to wean him back onto the breast, we carried on with one bottle a day for a number of weeks, until we stopped when my husband went away. When he returned we tried again, and he refused. When the time came to go to work, we tried to make him go cold turkey from the breast, offering him a EBM bottle 3 hourly all day. He refused and went for 24 hours without any fluids at all. 3 months later we are in the same position, except that he at least takes solids from the carer. He is always grumpy when I pick him up, as he just wants to be fed. When I drop him off he cries because he associates care with being thirsty. Have you any suggestions? I tried multiple teats, bottles, cups etc, all of which he is uninterested in. Do you think I will just have to wait for him to grow out of this phase? The carer suggested weaning him, but since he wont take a bottle I don't think that would go very well. If he wasn't in care I would be breast feeding until he self weaned. Any suggestions for my stubborn boy? |
Posted By: AngelaStuppl118171
Date Posted: 23 September 2013 at 10:58pm
| Hello thank you for today and the information give. Little bit of a back round, My boy is 3 months old, born 6 weeks prem, sleeps from 7pm, to 4 or 5 in the morning. Breast feed, In the day he has his cat naps aprox 4, 30 to 45 min each time.. feed when wakes and feed when he gos to bed, we start our day around 6/7am when very one else gets up. but come 3pm he won't go to sleep I have try to settle him in his cot, in my arms, But he just want go to sleep in his bed. I have a 15 yr old teenager and he comes home at 4 pm, When my husband comes home from work around 5:30 he is very ratty and some times just doesn't want a bar of my husband. We bath him around 6ish and by 7ish he goes to bed, only having to settle him once. How can I get my husband some time in the afternoon with his son, but still in bed by 7. I some times feel like my baby is waiting for everyone to come home, but this also ends up with a very over tired baby. |
Posted By: Amy129496
Date Posted: 24 September 2013 at 5:58am
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Hi there, My question is regarding my little man 3 months and night sleeping, He's been underweight a lot since he's been born due to my milk supply, he's always been a great sleeper. I am just wondering how I got about cutting out night waking for feeds when he needs to be putting on weight? And if I should be trying to cut them out or keep on. My boys 3 months and at last weigh in was 4.789kg. I had cut out formula during the day feeling like my supply had built up, since re introduced. So back ground of the day is. Waking between 7-8 feed within 30mins (breast and bottle if needed-thinking of introducing 100ml bottle every morning) then snuggle or play time. Back to bed around 10-11 sometimes 12-1230 depending how happy he is. I'm flexible about his day sleeps because he sleeps so well during the night! Feed before being put back( breast) if he's not put back asleep( off the breast) he some times cries for extended periods, I go in and give a dummy which is usually spat out, then more crying.. Other times he happily settles right in and falls asleep without any hassle. He sleeps anywhere from 45 mins to 3 hours sometimes 4. Wakes has Feed(breast) if I feel like he's still hungry he will get 50-100ml top ups during the day. Then up for play. Prob typically back for another sleep around 2-3. After a breast feed. As I mentioned my days flexible as we do pop out and he does really well for long periods of time up. I often wonder if he's going to long between sleeps as he's up for anywhere from 2-5 hours.he can have anywhere from 2-4 sleeps a day depending on outings( happy to fall asleep in buggy or car seat andtransfers reasonably) No strict night time bed time but getting closer to 7 every night. But always same process to be put down to sleep. Change, feed, swaddle, kisses, head rub, love you then walk out the room, with the addition of a dummy when needed.. So my question is.. Should I be able to knock out the night time dream feeds(11-12pm) and morning feed (4-5-selfwoken) with out damaging weight gain? I desperately want him to be sleeping threw the night for my sanity. I've taken away a lot of helpful advice today, just unsure I any of it applies to us in our situation. He happily falls asleep with bottom pats, or slight jiggling in bed. Haven't tried this during the night because of concern about his weight and getting lots of food into him! Hope I've given enough back ground. All looks a bit confusing |
Posted By: Pippijade006
Date Posted: 24 September 2013 at 7:48am
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Hi, Thanks for your wonderful talk today. It was great and I took a lot away from it. I think you mentioned that there was a link for the snow angel swaddle technique. Could you please post this link. Thanks |
Posted By: 11mileri
Date Posted: 24 September 2013 at 10:18am
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Hi there Dorothy, thanks again for the informative session!! I have one of the "catnappers" - 3 months, 6.5kgs, breastfed (after waking and sometimes before sleep)with very occasional bottles. He is getting approx 5 naps per day of no more than 30mins, usually with 1.5 to 2 hours awake time except for before bed which is slightly longer. Bedtime is at 8.30pm each night (trying to get to 7pm) and he wakes 6/7am with one night feed. We are using white noise, swaddling, in-arms jiggling or feed-to-sleep each nap. He goes down asleep every time. My question is should we start on the self settling training BEFORE we start on re-settling to get longer naps - or do this in tandem? We are about to start a version of the gentle sleep training that you discussed (limited periods of crying etc). Also with the re-settling during naps...how long should you spend? i.e if you get to the 20min resettling mark and he hasn't gone back to sleep, should you just get him up and start the feed/play cycle again? Thanks in advance:) |
Posted By: Deepika
Date Posted: 24 September 2013 at 5:59pm
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Hi Dorothy, Thanks for your time yesterday. I had a few questions that I needed a bit of help with. So as suggested by you my baby is no longer sleeping in the bassinet/ hammock. She is almost 4 months old and I have packed away everything like you suggested. She slept really well last night from 10:00PM till 1:00AM and then from 1:20AM till 6:45AM! I think we might be ok for night time sleeps but I'm finding the day time sleeping in the cot a bit of a challenge. I tried getting her to sleep while feeding or rocking her to sleep and then putting her on the cot, but its very difficult as she wakes up the moment I put her down! How can I get her to have longer better sleeps in the cot? You talked about cupping (i think).. I tried it but I think I'm not doing it right... do u have a video or something to refer to? She used to take the pacifier very well but in the recent few weeks suddenly she seems to hate them! I've tried to trick her but she finds out each time! Can you possibly guide me in trying to get her back to the pacifier? Also, when is a good time to start some solids.... there are so many mixed ideas and opinions from various people. Can I start some solids at 4 months and if yes, what can I start with? |
Posted By: Joanna107819
Date Posted: 24 September 2013 at 8:18pm
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Hi Dorothy, Thank you for a great session yesterday! Very informative and enjoyable  I started following you advise with my girl today (7mths old next week), I drew her out in the morning, putting her down later and she did 1hr (usually 20-30mins). I reversed her solid and milk feeds, topping her up before bed and she had a 2hr arvo sleep :-) So I will keep going and hopefully it remains as good. My question is around night resettling. Do you believe there is a time limit on resettling at night before feeding (giving in)? Last night we resettled for 2hrs. Crying would peak and drift to nothing but never stop for more than 5 mins. Thanks, Jo |
Posted By: Joanna107819
Date Posted: 24 September 2013 at 8:23pm
I would be interested in this response too please. My 7mth old girl would rather go thirsty than take a bottle 
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me! wrote:Posted By: Bex1
Date Posted: 24 September 2013 at 11:22pm
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Hi Dorothy I would really appreciate your advice around my little man’s sleep. He was really good at sleeping through the night (9-11 hours) until he was about 5 ˝ months and then he suddenly started waking at night. The waking got earlier and more frequent. The initial waking didn’t seem to coincide with any big developmental event (that I noticed) and he already had at least a couple of teeth by then. I was hoping it was just going to be a phase that he would grow out of but he is now 10 ˝ months old so I’m not so sure! In the last week he has twice managed to sleep 8 or 9 hour stretches (an improvement) but that means he still wakes at around 3 or 4 am and he did that for about a week a month or so ago and then reverted to more frequent waking. Often (not always) he wakes up when he hits the side of the cot when he moves about. He has never been a good sleeper during the day (usually only 30 – 45 mins at a time) unless he is cuddled and then he will sleep for much longer. Background: bedtime is 7 – 7.30pm (asleep 7.20-7.45pm) and he first wakes any time from a couple of hours after going to bed to 8 or 9 hours later. When he wakes before 3 or 4 am we try to re-settle (cuddle him) and put him back in his cot. If it’s after 3 or 4am or he’s particularly difficult to re-settle then he ends up sleeping in our bed (for our sanity’s sake). It is very rare that he actually needs food when he wakes up during the night. He usually wakes up for the day around 6.30-7.30am, has a breastfeed reasonably soon after waking, breakfast an hour or so after waking, morning tea followed by a breastfeed around 3 hours after first breastfeed, closely followed by an approx 30 minute morning sleep (although in the last week or so this has turned into a 10 minute nap either falling asleep feeding or in cot. I tried to stretch his sleep out and give him an early lunch one day but that resulted in lunchtime madness!). Lunch around 12pm, sleep around 1.30-2pm for approx 45 mins although have recently got him to re-settle for up to a further 1 ˝ hours sleeping in our arms. Afternoon tea around 3pm, dinner at around 5pm and breastfeed followed by a formula bottle just before bed (around 6.30-7pm). His day sleeps are mostly in his cot with the odd sleep in the car seat. He doesn’t self settle and we cuddle him to sleep. The handout on routines you provided referred to your recommended Toddler Routine for babies aged 10 to 12 months, however there was no Toddler Routine included. Would it be possible for you to post a copy please? Many thanks |
Posted By: jessiebutt
Date Posted: 25 September 2013 at 9:57am
| I tired to attend this coffee group but it was full and so went to the wellington one. I have a 9 month old baby boy and we live in Taita and are looking at making friends with people of similar ages/stages. I work part time, currently 3 days a week. My antenatal group wasnt ever active and our space group was the same. |
Posted By: raining_hana
Date Posted: 25 September 2013 at 1:49pm
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Hi Dorothy, Thank you for all the info the other day. I have a 2 1/2 year old girl and one on the way (due in december). I'm working on toilet training my 2 1/2 year old. We seem to have the wee side of things sussed but not number two's. She always goes away and hides when she's going number two. So we've had a couple of accidents. She poo's quite often too, two to three times a day so it is not fun times at the moment. I've put her back in nappy pants today as I don't want her to get discouraged. I would really like to get things sorted prior to our Dec baby arriving. Do you have any advise? Also she's reluctant to wear underware, so any advise there would be helpful also. Thanks heaps, Lynley G |
Posted By: TaniaTyrer116163
Date Posted: 25 September 2013 at 3:03pm
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Hi again Dorothy, By feeding solids, milk then milk again before bed will my daughter take a full feed, or will she be snacking? Also should I be sticking to the same time to feed each day? My daughter is 5 months old, sleeping through the night 7-7 with 1 feed at 430am. She catnaps during the day 4 lots of 45 minutes. However just tried your solids, milk and milk and kept her up and she slept for an hour and a half. We have progress! Thanks again for all of your wonderful advice! |
Posted By: Mrs_McCaw
Date Posted: 25 September 2013 at 6:03pm
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Hi Dorothy Fantastic session on Monday - thank you! My son is 5 months old and I want him to self-settle in his cot earlier in the evening. He's a great sleeper, rarely wakes, but I want him to go to sleep earlier. His background - born 3 weeks early, lost weight so was in hospital for two weeks, is breast fed all the time except in the last 2 months when he's had a 150-200ml bottle of formula as his last feed of the day. We're about 4 weeks away from solids too. Our evening routine - there are no set times for anything, it depends on how the day has been etc, but the order is feed, play, bath, feed (bottle and breast), sleep - falls asleep on me post feed and I transfer him into his cot. He is usually asleep by 11pm and wakes around 7-8am, and rarely wakes during the night. (When he does I've instantly fed him rather than trying to settle him back to sleep. That's not to say I rush in at the first squeak from him, I wait until I can tell he isn't going to settle). I like to think I've been a 'relaxed and easy' mum so far; along the lines of he'll sleep when he does, where he does. He's great in the car for sleeping too, and staying asleep in his seat once we're home (but not for too long so it's bad for his spine!). I do pretty much everything with/for him - my partner works 10 hour days in an operating theatre, so I understand can't be too tired and groggy at work - so it's me during the day and me during the night. I've not been great on spotting his 'tired signs' or anything like that either! As much as want him to be in a great routine, I also don't want to be restricted by it - i.e. going out in the day etc! If I suddenly brought everything forward by a few hours (instead of him having a nap around 6pm, bath at 8-9pm then bottle and asleep by 10.30pm) so he had his bath at 6-7pm then bottle and asleep, would he be likely to wake hungry during the night?? He doesn't have set sleep times during the day too. Wakes around 7-8am and straight on the boob. Then it's back to sleep for up to 1.5 hours. From then on the day is flexible until bathtime... Looking back and reading this I sound like a nightmare!!! Any tips for reigning us in would be much appreciated!! Regards Mrs McCaw |
Posted By: TaniaTyrer116163
Date Posted: 26 September 2013 at 11:40am
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Hi Dorothy, I have followed your advice with solids, milk, play and milk before putting to bed and my 5 month old slept for only 45 mins still. She is happy in her cot "playing". How long do I leave her in there before trying to resettle her back to sleep even though she is not crying? Kind Regards Tania |
Posted By: TaniaTyrer116163
Date Posted: 26 September 2013 at 12:27pm
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Hi again, sorry about all of the questions. When feeding solids, milk and then milk again, how long between feeds do I go? I used to feed my 5 month old every 4hours (milk) and 2 solids inbetween. Now with the new feeding I am unsure of when to feed her, especially since we are still working on getting her to sleep longer than 45 minutes. Thanks for all of your advice. Tania |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 28 September 2013 at 10:40pm
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HI here are my notes on introducing solids and vegetables. uploads/45521/Introd_Solids_copy__-_Wellington.pdf" rel="nofollow - Introd_Solids_copy__-_Wellington.pdf uploads/45521/Dorothys_Vegetables_-_Wellington.pdf" rel="nofollow - Dorothys_Vegetables_-_Wellington.pdf |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 28 September 2013 at 10:49pm
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HI I would need to know more about his daytime routine to answer this question correctly so here are some pointers. 7.00am Wakes 7.45am Breakfast followed by breast 10.00am Morning tea - full breast feed 10.15am Nap (minimum 1 1/2 hours wakes 11.45am) 12.00pm Lunch vegetables, protein, followed by breast 2.45pm Afternoon tea - full breast feed 3.00pm Nap (minimum 1 12/ hours wakes 4.30pm) 4.45pm Dinner - vegetables, protein followed by breast Evening routine - bath, milk, 7.00pm - this means that his last awake time is shorter however, most babies are tired at the end of the day and are keen to get to bed. With regard to the night waking he needs to re settle, therefore you need to take the time to teach him to do this. The difference between an adult waking and a baby waking during the night is that we have taught ourselves to resettle whereas babies need to be taught. Leaving him to cry for an hour wont get you anywhere - you can leave him for up to 20 minutes and then you need to resettle him. This takes TACT - time, acceptance, consistency and tranquility. If you are happy to leave him for a longer period of time then that is up to you as we all parent differently and we do what works for us and not what others do. If you were going to leave him like this then it would take a minimum of 3 to 4 days for some it can take longer but you would need not to feed him. I would never offer water in the night - if you are going to offer him something to suck then you may as well feed him. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 28 September 2013 at 10:54pm
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Hi I would strongly recommend not weaning him that is not the answer and also as you are a working mother it is the only thing that you can do that others cant. I would suggest getting a NUK first feeder cup and for every meal offer say 30 mls of milk in it. Eventually he will learn to drink from it. But you need to take the time and be consistent with him. YOu will pick up the cup and hold it for him. Also for his drinks before nap times again I would offer him milk out of a cup. The bottle to try is the evenflo bottle with the basic teat, however as he is 9 months old I wouldnt bother with the bottle. As long as he is getting a good balance diet from the care giver I would not worry about his milk intake. Also during the day when you are working it would be important to offer him sips of water but only sips. Add on - I also meant to say after reading my answer that you only wean if that is what you want to do and not what others are suggesting. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 28 September 2013 at 11:02pm
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Hi I would suggest that you need to take the time and teach him to resettle in his nap times so that he is getting good quality naps throughout the day so that he will not be overtired when everyone comes home Its not about just a particular time of the day but about his 24 hour routine. I wonder if he is sleeping so long at night as he is so overtired at night he just crashes. A routine I would look at for his age group is that his awake times are around the 1 1/2 to 2 hours and having naps of approx. 1 1/2 hours - resettling each nap time if he is waking before this. With regard to his awake times, I would suggest feeding him when he wakes and then again 15 minutes before he goes for his naps. To avoid the feed/sleep association you would feed, sleeping bag or swaddle if still swaddling and then into bed. I have attached my settling and resettling notes for you to read and although written for doing it in the cot, you can also do the settling and resettling in arms. ONce you have taught your baby to have longer naps in the day, then when dad comes home he will have a happier baby to cuddle and bath. uploads/45521/12_weeks_n_over_settling_ohbaby_wellington.docx" rel="nofollow - 12_weeks_n_over_settling_ohbaby_wellington.docx |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 28 September 2013 at 11:16pm
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HI Okay this is how I would see his daytime routine working with the emphasis of putting on weight and having good sleeping habits. As your son is 3 months is ideal awake times will be approx. 1 1/2 hours to 2 hours. Also ideally he is feeding every 3 to 4 hours during the day. Remember if he isn't feeding during the day then he needs to feed during the night. If you add his awake time and nap times this should totally approx. no more than 4 hours, so if he feeds at 7.00am his next feed (latest time) would be 11.00am. 7.00am Wakes 7.15am breast 8.45am Top up -Breast feed (important as the gastric emptying of a breast fed baby after 120 minutes is 16 to 18%) 9.00am Nap - minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle if he wakes (wakes 10.30) 10.40am Breast 12.15pm Top up -Breast 12.30pm Nap - minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle if he wakes (wakes 2.00pm) 2.10pm Breast 3.45pm Top up - Breast feed 4.00pm Nap - minimum 1 1/2 hours resettle if he wakes (wakes 5.30pm) 5.40pm Breast Evening routine, bath, breast, bed 7.30pm Bed for the night Night waking resettle, resettle, WIth your current feeding routine during the day it is important he has his night feeds as he is not feeding regularly during the day. IF you fed him regularly during the day then you could resettle during the night. I have written Breast in the above routine, however it can be formula. I would tend to do formula for the top ups if you were concerned he wasn't getting enough. Yes, he does well for being up but being overtired in the day wont help with putting on weight and also getting the feeds in during the day. Hope that helps |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 28 September 2013 at 11:17pm
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Hi this can be found on my website www.babyhelp.co.nz or www.babywithin.co.nz |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 28 September 2013 at 11:23pm
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Hi I tend to start with the self settling and once happy with that then move into the resettling. I have attached the notes on settling and resettling earlier so let me know if you need any more information. While teaching him to self settle when he wakes to resettle I tend to get in there straight away and start the cupping. I don't really give up as it takes approx. 20 minutes in my experience to find their sleep so to self settle and resettle it will take about the same time. So in answer to your question do you get them up and try later the answer is not really. If they don't settle in the cot then I do it in arms and again for the resettle. I would take away the white noise, feeding to sleep - although it is important to feed him before going to bed. I tend to do a feed approx. 15 minutes before naps and nighttime and then swaddle and then into bed. Don't start anything in arms that you cannot do in a cot so avoid the jiggling and also transfer to the cot before he is asleep if you are going to do it in arms. The goal is to sit still and just engulf him for approx. 20 minutes, if he doesn't fall asleep then intervene with cupping. ALso although I mention 20 minutes it can be less than this. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 1:40pm
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Hi well done on moving into the cot. The next step as you mention is to teach her to self settle in the cot and also re settle in the cot. The idea is to offer her milk approx. 15 minutes before going to bed and then putting her in her sleeping bag or swaddle and then into the cot. The feeding to sleep is a personal choice and is difficult to break and can take a long time, however feeding before like I have suggested does not cause a feed/sleep association. Jiggling rocking etc cannot be done in a cot, whereas cupping can. I am happy to reshow you how to do that over skype. My skype address is doffrey1 ideally tonight or tomorrow night would be good for me so just email at my email address dorothy@babyhelp.co.nz and let me know times that suit you and also in the subject heading please put wellington coffee catch up. You can do this two ways go back to the 0 to 12 weeks and settle in arms and transfer after about 1 1/4 hours in arms or go into the over 12 week settling in cot. They normally stop using dummies around 6 months so I would only offer her it as a last resort so let her have some time to find her sleep and then intervene with cupping and the dummy. A great toy to have with the dummy is the sleepytot comforter - you can velcor the dummy on to it. Have a look at her website. Solids depending on the baby somewhere between 4 and 6 months. I tend to try and sort out the sleeping issues at this age before introducing solids unless they are over 7 kilos and then I would address their food intake. The way to improve her sleep habits nap wise is TACT - time, acceptance, consistency and tranquility. Sleep is a nutrient and just as important as food. Yes, some babies need more than others but a minimum 1 1/2 hour nap is what I would recommend for most babies and of course they can have longer if they want. I have posted both settling and resettling notes for - to 12weeks and 12 weeks over on the forum so have look. Also the introduction of solids and vegetables is also posted. D |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 1:47pm
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Yes there is always a cap on how long you take to settle and resettle. I tend to cap it around the 45 minute mark, however some babies take longer and some less. Ideally It is around the 20 to 30minute mark. Well done on the change - love having happier babies and happier mums. So the evening routine would look similiar to this 5.00pm Dinner , breast, bath, breast, clean teeth, bed She could also possibly want more food - solids so I would mix cereal with vegetables and see if that helps. You also mentioned that she would peak and drift to nothing but never stop for longer than 5 minutes. To me this is her going to sleep pattern and probably after 20 minutes to 30 minutes I would have stayed in the room cupping her to sleep. She just couldnt get there on her own but it will come. If this is resettling during the night then it is important to stay there until she falls in a deep sleep. And yes you will think you are there and as soon as you head for the door she will wake so then you go back and continue until you can come out of her room. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 1:48pm
| Hi i have answered this question earlier so hopefully that was helpful. but you just need to be consistent |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 6:10pm
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Hi until you teach him to self settle and resettle during the day naps you cannot expect him to suddenly do it at night. A lot of babies are good sleepers to around this age and then start waking - it can be due to big developmental steps, hungry and needing solids, teething and sometimes when they are sick. As you are cuddling him to sleep this is not a problem as long as there is no movement involved and you are giving him the right to find his sleep before intervening with cupping. At some stage you will probably want to try to settle in his cot so the step here is to have him in arms for a certain amount of time and then put him in his cot for the remainder of the time it takes to get him to sleep. Then once you are comfortable with this then you would put him into the cot drowsy and go from there and eventually the next stage would be awake into his cot. These steps will not happen overnight but will take some time. As he is over 8 months he needs food before milk so I would suggest that his first feed of the day be his solids. If he wakes before 630am then you need to resettle or leave to play in his cot happily. To avoid the head banging on the sides of the cots I would recommend using the air vent wrap mesh bumpers - these are sold from various baby stores air wrap mesh bumpers - depending on what time of cot you have depends on whether you buy the 2 sided warp for cots with solid ends or the 4 sided wrap for all sides . One of the theories about night waking is as follows for babies aged 10 months plus: There is one theory that night waking or early morning waking is due to babies/toddlers looking for that first milk feed of the morning. It’s like they are ‘excited/crazy’ to have that sucking time. Sucking is also their way of comforting themselves and so they feel the need to do this to resettle during the night. If you take away the first milk feed of the morning and replace it with solids then after a few days (maybe up to 10) your baby should wake a little later in the morning or not so much at night because the ‘sucking’ on the milk has gone and at the same time your baby can learn to find different ways of self settling. Some believe it’s a kind of ‘maturing’ or moving onto their next milestones going from “sucking” to eating food and drinking from cups. I have attached a toddler routine for you to look at and adjust this to suit your family uploads/45521/2_naps_Toddler_general_guideline_Wgtn_.pdf" rel="nofollow - 2_naps_Toddler_general_guideline_Wgtn_.pdf |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 6:12pm
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Hi everyone can you please help this lady out and pass on some coffee group or other groups that she can join. sadly I do not know wellington at all well so cant recommend anywhere. Good luck |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 8:37pm
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Hi this is normal for number two's and it take time for toddlers to be encouraged to do a poo on the loo. I tend to encourage them to ask for the nappy pant when they want to do a poo so that they feel okay about this. As she goes away to hide, I would suggest that she puts a nappy pant back on then and over time she will learn to do it on the loo. A further step is to put the nappy pant on and encourage her to sit on the toilet - some toddlers feel safer this way. Everyone will have a story on how they taught their children to do number 2's but it is about taking the time, being consistent, and calmness around this. Forcing or disciplining doesn't work, however some other suggestions are a reward system, books, dvd's - all relevant to doing wee's and poo's on the toilet. If you are concerned re this then I would suggest a visit to the GP or Ped and talk it through with them. Not wanting to wear underwear - does this matter she is only little. The more you make an issue of it the worse it will become. I have seen little girls take their knickers off in public and run around without them. She will at some stage learn to leave them on. Ways to encourage is mummy wears knickers, or gosh your bottom will get cold or chilly with no knickers on. Buy her favourite character knickers and this sometimes encourages them as well. Encourage her to put them on herself. If she insists she doesn't want to wear knickers then dress her accordingly ie. leggings, longer dresses. Toddlers often like to mimic their parents so do knicker dressing together and also does she see anyone else do poos on the toilet - demonstrating is a good way to encourage them. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 8:40pm
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No she wont be snacking - Snacking to me is feeding all day and all night this happens in particular with babies who only do short sleep cycles. By ensuring she has enough food in her tummy to go to bed at night is fine. At the evening feed i do solids, milk, bath and then milk again. The smaller milk feed will be the one with the solids and ideally the feed before bed will be a bigger feed. Well done progress is important. I was going to say you do need to spend some time resettling in the day and as she seems happier with this way of feeding then if she wakes earlier try resettling as this will help her to re settle at the 4.30am wake up |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 10:15pm
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Hi by having a routine that is flexible it does not restrict you from going out and doing what you need to do. What it does do is it teaches your son how to self settle and resettle at the times he is meant to be sleeping while you are out and about. I have always encouraged babies to have a moving sleep and a concrete sleep (cot) but these are always within 1/2 an hour of the times that i would like to work with. Routines are about being flexible and babies thrive on knowing what is happening next. If you teach your baby to self settle and re settle it means that when you are out and about and come home he can then be transferred into his cot and he will resettle himself. Once he comes out of the capsule and is in a rear facing carseat you will be unable to take that inside for him to continue sleeping so ideally now is the time to teach him to resettle. Not sure why he is 4 weeks away from solids as solids start between 4 to 6 months depending on the individual baby. I find that most babies start somewhere between 5 and 6 months. I take each case individually and work with the baby and I also take into account the weight of the baby. I have posted notes on introducing solids and vegetables earlier in the forum so you may like to have a read of them. Again once you start solids you will need some routine in his life so that he is eating breakfast, lunch and dinner at certain times of the day - again i work within 1/2 hour either side of the time that I would ideally like them to be at. WIth regard to moving his times to an earlier time the answer would be that he would sleep the same length of time so he will be sleeping for approx. 8 to 9 hours so if you put him to bed earlier he would sleep the same amount of time but is getting his sleep before midnight which as we all know is the better sleep times. A routine for him would be as follows - you will need to adjust the times to suit your family life but the consistency is his awake times and nap time 7.00am Wakes 7.15am Breast (this will also be his breakfast time once he is on three meals a day) 9.30am Breast 9.45am Nap (I am working on a minimum of 1 1/2 hours) 11.15 he wakes 11.30am Breast 1.45pm Breast 2.00pm Nap 3.45pm Breast Option here is either do the evening routine and he will be in bed for the night by 6.15pm - which is what I would do or you can give him a band aid nap of approx. 20 to 45 minutes so that his evening routine starts around 6.00pm and he would be in bed for the night by 8.30pm - which is late but once he drops it and his awake times for the day stretch to 3 hours and he is having two naps of minimum 1 1/2 hours he would be going to bed a lot earlier. I would tend to resettle in the night which is what you are doing, the difference is that if he doesnt find his sleep I would then go in and cup him until he goes back to sleep. Feeding to me is the last resort during the night for this age group. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 10:20pm
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HI Tania It takes a minimum of ten days to see any light at the end of the tunnel when changing their routines and a minimum of six weeks to change their circadian sleep cycle If she is happy in her cot I would leave her alone - she may not be sleeping but at least is resting. When her tone changes then I would intervene and help her to resettle. How long would I do this for. I find that this age they can sleep for 45 minutes, it will then take her and you another 45 minutes to get back to sleep and then she may sleep for another 45 minutes. In total 90 minutes sleep with a break of 45 minutes in between. Over time you would hope that they will merge together to make one long nap time. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 10:28pm
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Hi a typical routine for a 5 month on solids would look similiar to this 7.00am Wakes 7.15 am Breakfast - cereal mixed with milk, option to offer fruit - ratio I use is 1 tablespoon of cereal to 1 teaspoon of fruit, Breast to follow after leaving the highchair (I tend to wash and dry face and hands, wipe highchair, rinse plate and then offer breast) 9.15am Breast 9.30am nap (wakes 11.00am) 11.30am Lunch - vegetables, followed by breast milk 1.15pm Breast 1.30pm Nap (wakes 3.00pm) 3.30pm Dinner - cereal mixed with milk, followed by breast evening routine - bath, breast, clean teeth, bed OR again the option is to offer a band aid nap late afternoon of approx 20 to 45minutes so that the dinner/evening routine starts around 5 to 6pm. This nap will be dropped once her awake time stretches to 3 hours. You mentioned you fed 4 hrly but if your baby was only sleeping 45 minutes then you would add that together with her awake times and that would make her feeding times so I am assuming her awake time is 3 1/4 hours and napping for 45 minutes which would make for a very tired baby. |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 10:31pm
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Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 10:43pm
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Here are the notes on how to settle and resettle 0 to 12 weekers uploads/45521/ohbabywellington_0_to_12_wks.doc" rel="nofollow - ohbabywellington_0_to_12_wks.doc |
Posted By: DorothyW
Date Posted: 29 September 2013 at 10:44pm
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Hi Ladies Thank you for all your questions and hopefully the answers will help you. It was lovely to meet you all at the OHBaby Coffee Catchup. Remember before you do anything STOP, THINK, and ACT – work out what you are doing, why you are doing, and what you are trying to accomplish and then act. Remember YOU are the baby’s mum and so listen to your heart and instinct. Yes, we all don’t do it by the book, or get it right the first time, but you need to make ‘mistakes’ to get it right for you. It’s a time of learning a little person’s personality and figuring out what works for your home life. If you have the time I would love to see you pop over to http://www.facebook.com/BabyWithin and 'like' it. You can then keep up with information that I post from time to time or hear from other mothers who write on the wall. Also there is now a “recommendations’ section and it would great to hear your comments. Please remember as a parent or carer that you should understand and acknowledge that Dorothy is NOT a licensed medical doctor or other licensed medical provider and the information that I share with you has come from experience and working with numerous families and babies and toddlers |