Giving away baby gear - ettiquette
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Topic: Giving away baby gear - ettiquette
Posted By: LuckyRed
Subject: Giving away baby gear - ettiquette
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 10:13am
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I have several lovely friends and family members who have already started giving me their baby gear. It is all really amazing quality and obviously cost them a bomb. I have been offering them money but they never want any payment and are just being super lovely.
What's the etiquette around this type of thing, should I be giving them something in return? Or should I return the items when I have finished with them? What has been your experience on the giving or receiving end? Most of them have finished having babies so it's not like I will be able to return the favor one day. -------------  
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Replies:
Posted By: KH25
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 10:37am
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I would just straight out ask them when they give it to you. ie can I give you some money for them, or do you want them back when I've finished with them, or should I sell on TM and give you the money? etc ------------- Kelly, mum to DD, 19Jun06 (26wks 1lb15oz) DS1, 24Oct10 (32wks 4lb11oz) and DS2, 31Dec11 (32wks, 4lb11) http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: KH25
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 10:37am
Oh and congrats on your pg  ------------- Kelly, mum to DD, 19Jun06 (26wks 1lb15oz) DS1, 24Oct10 (32wks 4lb11oz) and DS2, 31Dec11 (32wks, 4lb11) http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: EmDee
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 11:23am
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Yep, I do the same and ask at the time. Most of the time people are just glad to not have to deal with things anymore, so don't want anything for them (well for clothes etc, bigger ticket items might be different). ------------- DS 8 DD 6 DS 4 DD 2 |
Posted By: Casablanca
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 1:13pm
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It seems to take up so much room to store old baby stuff, even clothes, so if I was giving stuff away my friends would actually be doing me a favour by taking it off my hands. We have been given heaps of stuff, I have offered to return it when I'm finished, the ones having more babies want it back, and the others are just glad to be rid of it! I would probably offer to pay for more expensive items, like cots or carseats etc, they will soon tell you if they want some money for it, and if not at least you offered! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 2:27pm
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Yep I would offer to pay, then if they say no, I would offer it back to them when Ive finished, and if they dont want it back, I would ask them what they want me to do with it.
I lent all our baby stuff to a good friend who had a baby when our #2 was a year old,...we told them not to pay us anything but that we wanted it all back as we wanted another baby- it was nice to not have to find storage for it all and nice that they were able to get good use out of it. Our baby capsule we bought new for #1- she is now 5- its been used for her, our DS, our neice and 2 freinds babies, now is back for us for our #3- we are glad its had use instead of just being stored all that time! |
Posted By: MammieB
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 4:28pm
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I think it is very much a "pay-it-forward" kinda thing.
People love giving baby things and like everyone says it saves on them having to store it 
I have given my friend alot of Olivia's clothes for her baby and know that if it ever needs to she will return the favour. She also used our cane bassinet and has some toys - she calls me her "toy library". I just like that I can help out where I can and I think alot of people feel that way. If they don't want it back and don't mind you selling stuff why not "donate" half of the $$ to their child/children for something nice? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://daisypath.com"> 
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Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 5:03pm
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We were given heaps and i wondered about this same thing at the time. Usually said "are you sure i can'y give you any money for this" and after a few no's stopped.
Now i am giving it away because so much was given to me and it's nice to get rid of it and help out another friend who is having a baby. I have had friends offer first dibs on (bigger) things they were going to list on tme too. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 7:25pm
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I agree - ask. Especially whether they want the things back.
In my case, I've been given so much, I figure I'll pass a lot on when I've finished having kids and everything will even itself out  -------------   
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Posted By: Lucky apple
Date Posted: 28 February 2012 at 9:13pm
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I think offering to pay is good.
I got given my cot...and when I'm done if the people don't want it back, plan on "paying it forward" rather than selling on TM. |
Posted By: Red
Date Posted: 29 February 2012 at 12:06pm
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I agree, most people just want it off their hands as it takes up so much room to store. Maybe if you want to give them something, do some baking or send them a nice card? ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: andweknowthis
Date Posted: 01 March 2012 at 12:22pm
| It depends who's given to me, to be honest. If it's someone who I know will say just keep it, I don't want it anymore I'll sell it or give it to someone else, or if it's someone who's maybe keeping their clothes for their next baby I'll give it back. I've never asked anyone but the people who've given me stuff I know well enough to know what they'd want. And it's true that most people don't want it back, unless they're planning to have another baby soon! |
Posted By: Blankney94
Date Posted: 01 March 2012 at 5:14pm
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Hi LR! So when it comes time to get rid of the clothes, I will hopefully find a deserving family in order to "pay it forward". I thought it was a nice idea too to add the clothing "donors" to the thank you list (ie when you send out thank you cards after the baby is born). ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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I got given heaps of stuff when DD was born. I always asked if they wanted payment, or wanted the goods back when finished with. Pretty much all of my friends/family have finished having babies. Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 02 March 2012 at 8:48am
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We got given 2 cots (woman had twins and was rather disappointed we weren't but didn't need 2x cots), I asked her if she wanted them back (obviously she didn't).
Generally I think if people want them back they will let you know... A family member gave us a cane bassinet and specifically said to look after it and to return it when we are finished for the next baby in the family. Another thing I found was most people say 'I have some stuff I want you to have for the baby' which to me doesn't imply they want payment.. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 04 March 2012 at 11:58am
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I think it is like anything you get given, you either chose to offer to pay or take it as a gift which it was intended to be.
I don't expect money when I give someone something & I don't "give" things I want back...may loan but that's different. I have never given baby clothes I want back, don't see the point in that. LR I think the people around you are very excited for you & want to share in that, so enjoy  & 1 day you will be in the position where you will want to give
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