Telling People
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Name: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Description: Trying to get pregnant? Going through fertility treatment? Just planning your first or second child? There are many people out there in the same boat to help and listen and share with
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=4126
Printed Date: 17 August 2025 at 5:34am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Telling People
Posted By: Peanut
Subject: Telling People
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 9:28am
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Hey all,
Am not pregnant....yet, but have a couple of questions: How long did you wait to tell people? Did anyone do anything cool and different to tell their parents? Thanks...am a teacher so always planning and organising!!! |
Replies:
Posted By: littlejo
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 10:42am
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We told at about 10 weeks after we'd had a scan. It was really hard not telling until then, but I guess it seemed kind of unreal until we'd actually seen the little bean!
We didn't tell them in any special way really...just called them up. Was quite funny though - the in-laws had just been joking a couple of days before about our new car being a "family wagon" and pretend-waving goodbye to the grandkids in the backseat...so we told them it wouldn't be long till they were waving for real. ------------- Jo Jo http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 11:06am
Hiya Peanut! I'm not yet either, but I have hopes for this cycle  (first proper cycle since endo surgery, lotsa ...mmpmfph ...well ... at the right time, some vile disgusting herb concoction that I had made up to help things along, and just general holding-my-breath!!).
If we do manage it this cycle, we'll be coming up to 12 weeks around Christmas, and what I was thinking of, if I could hold out that long with not telling anyone, was sending both sets of our parents a card with a scan photo in it. We thought that'd be a laugh! ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 11:09am
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The first we waited a little while to tell work and other people (other than my best friend - couldn't keep it a secret). We told our parents face to face other than my dad who was away but as soon as he was in phone contact he rang mum and mum told him to call me asap. I told my mum like this: Well I can't do this from Australia as i'm not there, like you did to your mum. She knew straight away. This time around I did the test by myself - my good friend was around soon after and just laughed at me as we had been talking recently about me TTC for number 2 at the end of this year. I rang DH and told him - he was happy. That was Frinday. On Saturday we had a big family party (an 80th, 70th and two 50th - twins) all on my mum's side of the family. Mum had been talking with one of her aunties and was asked how far away number 2 was and mum said a while (as I had decided jsut before all of this to go back to uni fulltime) then when we got there and my mum had told me what she had been saying and I told her she had been lying to her aunties and to tell them number 2 is in Febuary. My whole family (other than a few of my stuck up cousins that I have no time for and my mum's sister and brother) were all happy for us. How old are the children you teach? You could take in a scan photo if they are old enough to understand when you do get pregnant. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: EthansMummy
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 11:38am
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I didn't find out until i was 11 weeks so we waited until the 12 week mark and then told everyone. Our mums, dads, brothers and sisters knew straight away thou.
We just kind of blurted it out to everyone - no special way. That idea of showing the kids a scan is good, if they are old enough. ------------- ** MUM TO ** Ethan 29/08/2006 Brooke 22/09/2008 |
Posted By: jax
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 11:49am
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My mum took it a lot better than I thought she would when we did decide to bring it up, waited about three weeks I think it was, after we'd found out ourselves. I went out and bought two teeny white bibs, and had one embroidered with 'I Love Grandma' and the other with 'I Love Grandpa' for my father in law. ------------- Jacquie - Mama to Erin, 13.07.06 - Chief Cat Chaser & Marmite Sammie Eater 
Love many, trust few, harm none. ~Anon~ |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 12:32pm
| We tyold everyone at 12 wweeks. But I actually read of a woman who decided not to tell until then and suffered from a miscarriage. then she said that because no-one knew, she didn't have that support she needed so the next time, she would tell straight way! |
Posted By: Jay_R
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 12:55pm
| Yep, I agree with Liz. Whats the point in keeping it a secret? |
Posted By: Peanut
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 12:56pm
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Thanks for all the feedback. Keep the ideas coming. Love the bib idea and the christmas card!! Was thinking I would prob tell people around 8 weeks for the saem reason as above as would like support!!
My kids are year 9 and 10 so the old 3rd and 4th form!! All boys so not really sure they would be into it...prob more grossed out that old people have sex!!! |
Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 1:23pm
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Lizzle has a good point - my neighbour lost a baby at the 12 week mark, the miscarriage began as she was visitng family, so the news was "I'm pregnant, but I think I'm losing the baby". She said it was the most awful thing in the world. For her next pregnancy, she told family very early. ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Posted By: Paws
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 4:37pm
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We told people pretty much immediately for the same reason...if something had gone wrong I would have wanted the support!
We told our parents as soon as we found out and close friends were told that same week, mainly because we also couldn't keep it a secret. The weekend after we found out though was my sister in laws engagement party so we held off the big extended family annoucement so they wouldn't have any attention taken away from their big day. We announced to the rest of the family the following weekend at B's birthday though it turns out some had already guessed by then! (hadn't you Red?  )------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 4:38pm
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I read the same article, just before we found out we were pregnant. So I told my senior management team and my syndicate pretty much within days - I figure if we do lose the baby I will need the support at work. We also told MIL & FIL the day we found out.
I have told a few friends, one of DH's friends told someone else (which annoyed me as it is DH's right to tell, not anyone else!) so he has emailed everyone he knows about it. i am still more selective with wholesale knowing, but mostly because I don't want it in the school community just yet, as all the parents new and old will want to come and tlak to me! Too tired to deal with that. -------------  
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Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 4:47pm
| We told straight away, with Kobe we went to see my parents and they were having tea, we sat down and talked for about an hour then I said oh and by the way we are having a baby, mum started chocking on her tea then burst out crying. With the twins we told straight away aswell and was relieved i did because I was really sick and we did lose them at 11 weeks and I really needed the family support cos we had to wait over a week to find out that we definatly had lost them and that was such a horrible long week I dont knwo what i would have done without everyone. With Addison we didnt wait, my friend was over when we did the test so she new first then looked after Kobe so i could go and tell hubby who was playing cricket. |
Posted By: Red
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 6:26pm
| Yes Paws, the fact that you nearly threw up at the smell of coffee kind of gave it away! |
Posted By: Bombshell
Date Posted: 20 October 2006 at 9:23pm
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we shared pretty much straight away with mum etc....didnt see any point in hiding it and I ended up bleeding at week seven or six so had to tell people as ended up at A and E - luckily as i was already showing...seriously!!! I had told my boss and work the day before so when DH rang to say i was at a and e they completely understood....
It did feel weird knowing so early on and telling people but means we have been able to share it and relax and not hide it...not sure i could anyways...Im HUGE |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 21 October 2006 at 1:04am
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I told my Mum straight away- then my Dad within a few days. Dh told his parents after that and then we told our 2 best friends. We kept it at that for a week or so then a few people I see alot of guessed when I was about 6 weeks when MS kicked in really bad. We will leave it until 12 weeks to tell everyone else.
I think a card saying- congrats on being a new grandma/dad/unlce/aunt etc is a nice way to do it  ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
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Posted By: Guests
Date Posted: 21 October 2006 at 9:33am
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I told the parents straight away didnt do anything special coz i was still in shock we had been trying for a year lol
But when we had the scan and found out its a girl we called Corys mum up on her bday and told her and she was crying she was so happy! Ella G is the first girl on my hubbys side of the family for 86 years 
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Posted By: Roksana
Date Posted: 24 October 2006 at 4:21pm
I found out I was pregnant (5 weeks) and phoned my mum and said "guess what? I have some news...I dont want you to scream or jump up and down, and please dont tell any one else except dad....I am pregnant"....my mum said Uh huh!! Hello....you are not happy mum? well you are the one who told me to not get toooo excited!!  But she was over the moon 10 min later when most people left the room!!! and she rang me back!!
My MIL was in Singapore at the time, she called and told us that her sister bought some baby stuff ...and she told her not bother for us as she does not think that we will ever have kids (we were married for 3 years, and I was asked from day 1 when I am having a baby).....then I told her! she was like oh!!! and I could hear wooo hooo from the back ground! I think she was just glad that I was finally having a baby. We told our friends and rest of the family after 3 months (according to my DH's family its bad luck to announce prior to that) 
Blah blah blah OVER!! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: BaAsKa
Date Posted: 25 October 2006 at 5:52pm
We told my mum the same night i found out, my sis found out when i was 6 weeks and in hospital with complications, we didnt tell my inlaws until i was 7 months!!!!!(i didnt start to show until then) because they were still extremely upset with my SIL who had gotten pregnant a few weeks before us to a stranger!!! and they were NOT happy! although hubby and i had been together for 4 years! we knew they would stress (they stress bout everything!!) about our age!. Needless to say - alot of people were very suprised when i had Bay because they never even knew!!
We were thinking when we get pregnant next we may not tell until 5 months (we wont tell anyone at all except Ohbaby of course!:)) so we can give them a pink or blue "hint" (as you can tell my family and inlaws are never overly exstatic about birth anouncements
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Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 25 October 2006 at 7:12pm
| I was so freaked out over telling my parents. i was waiting for a lecture about being silly...nevremind I was married and had been for two years and was 26!!!! Mum and Dad were predictably over the moon, and even more so with Taine as it meant we were coming home to boot! |
Posted By: my2angels
Date Posted: 25 October 2006 at 10:02pm
| The thing about telling people you are pregnant is then they know you are having sex. I felt really funny telling my parents, I was excited and was married and all but its kind of like a confirmation thier wee girl is actually having sex. When people ask how far along you are you can see them mentally calculating when you must have conceived, i feel like saying 'dont think about when i had sex, thats just not right'. I remember our computer tech at works girlfriend was due on the same day and it was an office joke that there must have been nothing on tv that night which was very embarassing. |
Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 26 October 2006 at 12:36pm
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We told everyone right away as we were just too excited to keep a secret! I agree with the m/c thing after having a SIL go through that at 8 weeks preg. It's a lot easier to get support if people (at least your family) already know that you're pregnant.
The other reason I have heard people telling right away is if their m/s is out of control. A friend of mine would have to run out of the room with no warning cause her m/s came on so quick - so she thought it was better to explain than to offend. I think it takes us up to a day to get used to the idea and then we start picking up the phone etc... it's quite fun -------------  |