Is the strangers baby after my milk?
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Topic: Is the strangers baby after my milk?
Posted By: Plushie
Subject: Is the strangers baby after my milk?
Date Posted: 25 September 2011 at 8:51pm
| Not really serious issue but always has us thinking - a friends DD was breastfed til 4 months and has been on formula full time since then, now 10 months. Whenever i pick her up she graps the neck of my tops and puts her whole head down my front, would get into my bras too if i didnt stop her. She doesnt seem to do it to anyone else (am the only b/f in our group) can she smell my milk and is going after it or do i just wear fun to play with tops? Just curious! |
Replies:
Posted By: Nothing
Date Posted: 25 September 2011 at 10:08pm
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I bet she is, if it was me I would just pop a boob out and see what she did (with mums permission of course) ------------- 
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Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 25 September 2011 at 10:13pm
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My friends boy who hasn't been BF since he was 3ish months old does this to me all the time. Kids do it all ages BF or not. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: freckle
Date Posted: 25 September 2011 at 10:34pm
um why? ------------- mum to 3 lovely girls :D |
Wriggles wrote:Posted By: mamanee
Date Posted: 25 September 2011 at 10:35pm
"Oh hey.. do you mind if I shove my boob in your kids mouth to see what they do?" What a fun conversation between friends! 
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 8:00am
You are joking, right??????? ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 8:23am
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Hah - i won't, but thanks! Though she did come over during the feb EQ eyeing up my freezer stash in case it got bad down here (not in chch but close enough to feel the aftershocks). Mummy_becks, thanks, was wondering if its specifically her going in after the smell of milk or if i just happen to wear tops she likes to put her head down.
Not for any serious reason of course, just curiosity. |
Posted By: Nothing
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:00am
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No I was serious. I would ask permission first, and if it was alright then there is no harm done. -------------
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Posted By: Nothing
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:04am
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And I know this isnt the same situation as above, but I would do the same as in http://www.drmomma.org/2011/08/modern-day-wet-nurse.html - this story here. -------------
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:13am
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I just think that is inappropriate and unneccessary Wriggles. I would happily feed a hungry baby if there were no alternative but to just flop it out for the sake of seeing what a baby would do... Unless it was a close friend/family member who had the same parenting "style" as you and you know would not be mortified why would you even bring it up to alienate yourself...
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Posted By: Nothing
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:21am
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*sigh did you not read that I WOULD ASK FIRST.
Everyone has their own opinions and perceptions on things, I just posted my view, you do not have to agree with it, however you do not have to go attacking me about it either. I can see the cattyness coming out now, its such a shame as this place used to be nice. -------------
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:44am
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I don't have a problem with shared feeding at all, however I think that unless the person was also of a similar parenting background as yourself, I wouldn't mention it at all.
And Bowie, yep, baby can smell your milk, lol. Very cute!! ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Tissy
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:09am
I can see the cattyness too. I'm new to this site and was having a look around the different areas and its the same few names that come up that seem to clash with others and not can't seem to grasp the idea that we are all adults and if we don't like what we read (or that someone elses views on whats right or wrong are different to our own) then too bad we live in a world where we have free speech and writing/responding on a forum isn't a life or death matter (or a necessity). I'm probably going to get slammed for saying it but I do believe that as an adult i can have an opinion. And this is it. |
Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:21am
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Lol,allllways comes back to the cattiness issue,or the clique issue. ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Faffer
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:31am
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Clique-ity clique lol!
Back on topic though, I've had the same thing Bowie. I hope its just super sensitive baby noses! I'm paranoid I walk around all day smelling like milk, especially since I'm still regularly springing leaks and singlehandedly keeping the pigeon breastpad company in business. I've asked DH but his sense of smell isn't so great since he broke his nose and its not the done thing to ask a stranger if you smell like a dairy cow. -------------  
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:36am
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I am not being catty at all, I am appalled and yes I saw the "ask first" which is why I said that unless you knew the person well and knew they had the same parenting style as you why would you even mention it! Why is it when ever people have a differing opinion it is cattiness? I dont think your comments are catty, though others might.
Seriously, we need some new material.. catty, clique.. its getting old. I get what you were saying, and if it were my sister or my bestie I would probably say "whip it and out and see what happens" but not my coffee group! I have also had this happen and same Faffer, just hope noone else can smell me LOL Still leaking today! nearly a year on (it had stopped by 5 months with DS1 so this is new lol) -------------
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:38am
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Oh and I also have nothing against shared feeding, milk banks and the like. I would happily feed a hungry baby if needed.. yes from my own breast! -------------
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Posted By: Faffer
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:40am
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Crap MOP, was hoping there was light at the end of the tunnel and I was going to miraculously stop dripping sometime soon. -------------
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Posted By: kiwinz4
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:46am
| Wow, I think that's cute!! I had to give up BF at 6months because I had very little milk (built up with domperidone) and found it heartbreaking because my son loved it. I reckon bubs probably can smell the milk - for ages after my son would grab my front and suction his mouth to my boobs, top and all. |
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 11:46am
| Alex hasn't been BF since he was like 8 weeks old. He pulls at everyones tops.. mine.. Becks.. my mum.. DH.. anyone. So I don't think its necessarily a milk thing cause I sure hope the males tops Alex pulls at don't smell milky lol |
Posted By: snugglebug
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 12:10pm
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I agree with the above from EmptyVessel there are definitely people on this site who make it their mission to comment on everything even if just to disagree with it/make the person feel stupid. The cliquiness thing keeps coming up because it happens, enough people have noticed it for it to be real, it's been talked about on here since I first came on (2 years ago) and I have felt it at times. I'd say its the reason why there are nowhere near as many people using these forums as there used to be. But this thread isn't about that anyway, and MummyofPrinces I am most definitely not accusing you of it, I don't think you were being catty it was a fair comment, but just wanted to say on a more general level.
I think kids are fascinated with boobs for whatever reason, my son does it to me and Im not breastfeeding, he does it to my sister, Mum etc. But it's quite possible the baby does smell your milk hehe. I find now that Im not breastfeeding I can smell the milk on other people lol ------------- Me 28, DH 29 DS born 20 Nov 2010 (4 years old) #2 due October 7 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: lilfatty
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 12:57pm
I see paranoia still reigns supreme around here.------------- Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months) I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year  http://www.femininefitness.co.nz/category/blog - LFs weight blog
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 1:01pm
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What kid doesnt like boobies. Maybe you just have a particularly fine set! LOL! ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: Peanut
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 1:22pm
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No offence, I am a pretty relaxed parent but I would be extremely uncomfortable with someone from my coffee group suggesting that to me. Infact it would make me feel so uncomfortable I would probably never return to the coffee group. I am not against shared feeding etc at all but would hate to have something like that raised ina public setting where one or both of us could be left feeling very uncomfortable. -------------  
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Posted By: snugglebug
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 1:25pm
 um ok then lilfatty. If that's what you think.------------- Me 28, DH 29 DS born 20 Nov 2010 (4 years old) #2 due October 7 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: SophieD
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 2:02pm
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really? you wouldn't return to the coffee group at all?
I wouldn't say yes, but if someone in my coffee group asked and I said no, I would hope that as adults we would just move on, no harm done  it's just a boob after all...
------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 2:19pm
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I am now incredibly paranoid i stink of breastmilk everywhere i go. I wonder if its like smoking - you know, if you smoke you can't smell it but when you stop it absolutely reeks?
ETA: Thanks Bizzy, its totally true 
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Posted By: ChikkyD
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 2:21pm
LOL. That is all.  -------------   
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Posted By: sem
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 2:23pm
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I have a very sensitive nose, am no longer breastfeeding but have never smelled milk on any breastfeeding mum lol ------------- Here we go again, another baby on it's way! 
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Posted By: amme_eilyk
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 2:32pm
| lol, bowie. I personally would find it made things really awkward at the coffee group, potentially so awkward that I would not go back. however if there was a baby starving and really in need of it then I would do it. I am not against shared feeding either. |
Posted By: ....
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 3:43pm
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Prude.
Can we test it with Bentley on photoday? I wonder if he's got the shirt-pulling skills :D |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 4:39pm
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Are you leaking/wearing breast pads? I would say it's probably coincidence! DD has always been into boobies! Or 'that region'... MIL, me, FIL, DP... Her nana, grandma's etc! Even herself!
As for offering milk... I an not 100% sure. I wouldn't mind but don't know if I could ever ask someone if I could feed their baby... I would rather they ask me first tbh! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: MrsMJD
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 5:28pm
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I've worked with kids for a long time both as a nanny and as a nurse and have had countless babies and tots try to get into my top and that was before I had my own wee one. I wouldn't be too worried about it unless he actually tries to latch lol. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 5:40pm
| Yeah, wearing breastpads. Dont leak but i get a letdown on both sides so its a spray catcher. Lol, Bec, i havent even seen Bentley awake yet let alone had him try get into my clothes! |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 5:56pm
Paranoia? Really?? Come on you know its a clique, I know its a clique... And I'm addressing this to the particular group who I suspect has linked to this and all jumped on the bandwagon. I only had to look at the names coming up on the first page FFS! -------------   
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 6:18pm
hehe Bowie,who wouldn't be after your boobies? I've seen your photos,you've got a nice rack  -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: lilfatty
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 6:37pm
FFS If everyone came in here and agreed with the poster there never would have been any mention of a clique! As for your "particular group" you will know all too well that we do not all agree with each other on every topic we are not communists, we are allowed to have our own opinions. You will also know from experience that no one is ever asked to go and state a certain opinion in any forum. Yes there may be links to a thread of interest but at no time is anyone coerced into ganging up on anyone. So yes IMO paranoia still reigns and hence the reason you will find this place is so quiet these days, people can't be arsed dealing with it on a day to day basis. ------------- Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months) I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year http://www.femininefitness.co.nz/category/blog - LFs weight blog
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Posted By: T_Rex
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 7:05pm
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I'd actually be quite offended if someone offered to feed my perfectly healthy, well-fed baby! What would they be implying about my parenting?
And seriously, clique or not, that suggestion was far enough "out there" that I think most people would have been a bit taken aback, surely? ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 7:09pm
Possibly but its always the *same* people who don't agree - weird I know, coincidence though right
Really? I was thinking it was more the prevailing bitchiness that was the problem...  -------------
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 7:15pm
And just to bring it back to the original topic - TBH while not offended I would probably be reeeaaalllly uncomfortable with someone offering to BF my baby lol I like the concept but putting into practice? Not quite there yet
Bowie I've heard babies have an ingrained milk sense til they're about 18mo so maybe thats got something to do with it? Otherwise I'd be using it as an excuse to go shopping for cute nursing bras taking the self-sacrificing attitude of giving the people being flashed something nice to look at ofcourse -------------
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Posted By: SophieD
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 7:44pm
lol, so thoughtful ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 7:54pm
LOL SophieD I know right http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php"> its all about the thoughtfulness hahaha and the shopping ofcourse -------------
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 7:54pm
| I think you might be on to something, she pulled my top down the other day (and it was a kathmandu thermal - im not wearing heaps of low cut blouses in case you were all wondering!) and i had my grottiest scabbiest nana feeding bra on...shame. |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 8:00pm
http://www.sherv.net/laughing-emoticon-151.html"> Fabulous imagery haha DS1 did the same thing to me when I was preg with DS2 and wearing something grotty and that was it man I went out and got me some hot milk! But seriusly LOL a kathmandu thermal? HOW???-------------
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 8:45pm
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When I read the second post this morning, I didn't get a chance to post a reply to Bowie cause I was utterly gobsmacked and horrified that someone would suggest what the second poster did.
Peanut & T-Rex have summed up exactly how I feel. I do not have a problem with shared feeding by any means. But to have someone suggest to feed my child, I'm sorry but all I can come up with is WTF in answer. Put yourself in the other Mum's position & think about why she's not feeding, it might be purely choice, in that case you will probably imply what she is doing isn't good enough or it might be that she HAD to give up feeding her child for some reason & there fore you may really hurt her feelings in suggesting to feed her child. It might be funny if it was a person who would do exactly what you'd do but then surely that person would still be b/fing her child. Bowie, I think it's cute, babies do it all the time & no you won't smell of milk ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: snugglebug
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:09pm
Yep!! Not paranoid, just saying how I see it. I don't really care either way I take what I want from the site and leave the rest. Not losing any sleep over it. ------------- Me 28, DH 29 DS born 20 Nov 2010 (4 years old) #2 due October 7 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: escadachic
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:31pm
Gotta agree with you Babe -------------   
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Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:55pm
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And this is why I rarely post anymore...
I come in, I post, someone has a wee tanty about a clique or cattiness or bitchiness it all goes off topic and I end up feeling like I am doing something wrong. Whether I am agreeing or disagreeing... I do not understand why we can not just agree to disagree and get on with it. -------------
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Posted By: pudgy
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 9:57pm
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Can someone point out the 'bitchiness' to me please ? I see to be missing it
I wouldn't try it just to see what happens . I don't think that's appropriate at all. I'm not against milk sharing or bf someone elses child but just to see what happens ? Seems a little immature to me. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:00pm
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^^^^^ ooh oooh great example of bitchiness pudgy implying someone else is immature ^^^^^
LMAO ok nah now I'm just sh*t-stirring. I just think y'all need to think before you post. You might not think something is the snazziest idea but seriously has anybody EVER heard of TACT??? T.A.C.T??? Or even just a healthy dose of thoughtfulness. Just coz you can't see the other person doesn't mean that you should exercise your ability to be blunt, unkind, tactless or thoughtless. Theres no excuse for making someone else feel bad simply because you CBA wording things abit friendlier. -------------
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Posted By: pudgy
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:13pm
Ahhh I see your point I do think though that sometimes posts are interpreted the wrong way? Prehaps we shouldn't read of much into
them ? And imagine how boring the world would be if everyone was tactful ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: pudgy
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:16pm
Hear hear ! That's what is used to be like. A good honest, usually heated debate ( that rarely ended up with sh*t slinging and name calling) and everyone agreed to disagree. Usually coming away with a better insight into the 'other side' ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: palomino
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:19pm
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I can only see one person being bitchy, catty and blunt.
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Posted By: freckle
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:22pm
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well my post could be construed as blunt (i.e. "why")... but TBH I was a little taken back by why someone would suggest that... and if someone did suggest that to me when I had given up BFing for whatever reason I would be very taken back, and probably rather blunt, and maybe even tactless...
Also no offence Babe, but you can only control yourself and it is up to others to choose how they behave...I think when someone makes such an out there suggestion they would surely expect a few very surprised responses, and that's what has happened... not bitchiness imo ------------- mum to 3 lovely girls :D |
Posted By: cynthemama
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:25pm
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Wow.. just wow..
I am amazed! I read through this entire thread and I don't know what is going on but everyone was being pretty mild up until one person started going mental and calling other people tactless? I don't understand.. As for the thread, I would be mortified if another mother at my coffee group started asking if they could pop a boob out to see what my baby would do. IMO it's extremely innapropriate and crossing a line. |
Posted By: freckle
Date Posted: 26 September 2011 at 10:38pm
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deleted ------------- mum to 3 lovely girls :D |
Posted By: ....
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 12:37am
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You know what?
I'd f**king love it if someone from my coffee group would offer to give Bentley a feed. It f**king sucks that I can't breastfeed him myself, and I feel like sh*t for having no choice but to give him crappy, sub-standard formula, and I would feel so good if someone could give him what I can't, even just one meal. I don't know what your coffee groups are like, but if I'm happy to go out and spend a couple hours each week with a bunch of girls I've known for ten weeks now, when I hardly have time to shower, do dishes, anything at home, I think I know them well enough to have them feed my baby, if they offered. Saying you have nothing against wet nursing, but then writing how horrific it would be to have your baby doing it is a bit like starting a sentence with 'I'm not racist, but . . .' Do you let your child's daycare provider change their nappies? Same theory. Bored of this now. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 7:22am
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Tut tut tut!!!!
How embarrasing.... this must be the silliest topic i have ever seen degenerate into a cat fight! ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:43am
Have to agree Bizzy. Funny how we all say we're sick of the site and don't post anymore because of the bitchiness/cattiness but we all manage to find a bitchy/catty post and post on it yet fail to give constructive advice anywhere else on the forum...... just saying ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: freckle
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:50am
so when you've known someone for ten weeks at coffee group, do you know their whole health history?? with milk banks they screen the milk I would assume... just getting people to give your baby a feed puts your baby at risk for anything that person might unknowingly carry... ------------- mum to 3 lovely girls :D |
Posted By: pudgy
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 9:07am
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Bec I think you'll find the main objection is to the fact she suggested flopping her boob out to see what happens. She wasn't offering to feed baby. That's the part I see as inappropriate.
Have you looked up Eats on Feets NZ On fb ? There. Ight be bm thereyou can get or at last put in a request. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: cynthemama
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:10am
Having a daycare provider change their nappies and having another mum breastfeed your baby at coffee group because you feel guilty about giving him formula are not even in the same ballpark. If you're having trouble showering or getting anything done around the house with one baby, then maybe you should look at other ways to make things easy on yourself or find some support somewhere. I don't think passing your baby to someone else to breastfeed them at coffee group is really the answer.. |
Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:20am
Where did anyone say they wanted to do this??? Ok, I've figured what post you're referring to and seriously this is the most bitchy comment on here. Talk about twisting words. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: cynthemama
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:24am
Page three. "I'd f**king love it if someone from my coffee group would offer to give Bentley a feed." and "I think I know them well enough to have them feed my baby, if they offered." |
Posted By: ....
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:26am
Way to read half a paragraph. |
Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:28am
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Exactly, that is twisting something so how you want to read it to the extreme! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: cynthemama
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:38am
I'm only going on what YOU said! "I'd f**cking love it if someone from my coffee group would offer to give Bentley a feed" That is saying that you would love it if someone gave your baby a feed and why? Because you don't want to? Because you can't breastfeed and feel guilty about giving him formula? Because you want him to have breastmilk even if it's from another mum at coffee group? I can understand it in an emergency, or if they were family or a close friend you had known for 20 odd years, but a woman from coffee group you've known a matter of weeks or months for just one feed? I don't understand at all the reasoning behind it. |
Posted By: ....
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:44am
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Oh, for godsake.
It doesn't matter, I'll probably kill him or something before we even make it to coffee group, I'm such a terrible mum. |
Posted By: freckle
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:50am
?? but seriously, I too genuinely don't understand why you would want someone you have only recently meet to feed your baby? Has there really been that much guilt placed on non breastfeeding mums that they would feel the need to let someone else feed their baby, if even for just one feed?? I wouldn't think formula is that bad!! ------------- mum to 3 lovely girls :D |
Posted By: cynthemama
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 10:53am
I'm sure you're not at all a terrible mum. And we all have days like that so I do apologise if I offended. I have had two babies that I struggled insanely to breastfeed and both of them ended up on formula, one at three weeks old and the other at 5 months old. It's not the end of the world and I know it's not your ideal but at the end of the day your baby is being fed. When they get to four or five, nobody gives two craps how your baby was fed. The guilt I felt for not breastfeeding my first baby spilled over onto my second baby and I pushed myself too far. He didn't sleep AT all, I had no milk left, alsorts of problems, mastitis and excruciating pain. But you have to be kind to yourself and try to remember that you are doing the best you can, and it gets so much easier as time goes on. |
Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 11:00am
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hehe love this handbags at dawn stuff
Id think its a bit weird unless I wasnt in the position to feed by baby myself, as in I was incapacitated or really sick or something. And I think Id have to be quite good friends with them to know they are healthy etc Probably not just to see if it worked or they wanted it. Im quite protective over the fact I have worked pretty hard to the job myself My girls have not yet shown interest in anyone elses boobs, acccept for one morning when lying in bed with our little one , who is stillbreastfed, she was eyeing up daddys nipple but she looked a little unsure, lol was super funny ------------- http://lilypie.com] 
http://lilypie.com] 
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Posted By: maya22
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 11:01am
Yay, so glad you found it in yourself to say at least one sentence that was something nice and supportive to a fellow human being who is having a hard time. ------------- DS1 July 2007 DS2 Nov 2010 http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Kelz
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 11:05am
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Whoa! Ladies!
Is it so hard to be nice? I've said it once and I'll keep saying it.....parenting is hard! It can be hard to find support, hard to breastfeed, hard to figure out why baby is crying, hard to find time to do anything for yourself. Give each other a break! And just fyi....if you post 'nasty' words, even if they have a '*' in them, the whole post changes tone. If you don't want your post read in the wrong way then think about what you write and the words you use. ------------- |
Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 12:33pm
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I don't actually think Cynthemama is intentionally being hurtful or rude,its just the way her posts are coming across to some of you,the curse of posting on the internet and not being able to hear afflictions in someones voice or the expressions on their face.
Bec...oh chick,im not a counsellor,nor will I pretend to be,but you sound like you're in a really dark place right now and my heart goes out to you...being a mum is HARD! and especially when its your first and you are adjusting to sleepless nights,and having someone entirely dependant on you,and we all have days when we feel like terrible mums,I know I do (as I hide on the computer from my 2 year old) but if you were truly terrible...you wouldn't CARE that you were terrible. And if you were truly letting your son down by not feeding him breastmilk,then it would be because you weren't feeding him at all,breast is best,yes,but not always possible and formula is there because it means they can get fed another healthy way. Tell you what,when I got to my daughter's school I can't tell which kids were breast fed and which were bottlefed. PLEASE stop being so hard on yourself,we all do the best we can with whatever we can,if there is someone who can be a good shoulder for you to lean on,take it,I think you need it atm,hugs chick. -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 12:55pm
Oooh, you took the words out of my mouth (well, actually, my words weren't as well-articulated). Ignoring any debate or contention (which is all good for a giggle, BTW), I just hate to hear someone saying that they feel that stink for not being able to breastfeed. Honestly, hun, your baby will be fine and will grow up into a happy healthy little person who thinks Mummy is the best. Some of us manage to breastfeed right through, some of us don't. Formula is a perfectly, totally fine alternative if it doesn't work out. Please don't feel so bad about it  -------------   
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Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 5:11pm
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aww Bec, I really feel for you, if you werent so far away Id come take your lil one out for a walk so you could have some piece and quiet and a shower. Would have loved someone to do that for me. First time is such a blinkin learning curve!
My big girl is awesome , really clever, absolutely gorgeous and I was crap at feeding her, so formula for all its evils, did her just fine. I couldnt get her to gain weight without it! I still have days when I feel like I suck at this job and Im on number 2 baby now, so you are not alone!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com]
http://lilypie.com]
http://lilypie.com]
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 5:28pm
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^^^ DITTO to Raspberryjam ^^^
My big boy is blow-your-mind awesome and hes a formula baby. Unfortunately babies don't come with a manual but learning how to parent and finding that process difficult doesn't make us terrible mums - its actually normal
You'll find your groove chick  It took me 3 years LOL can't do much worse than that
And FYI I BF'd #2 he latched on like a dream and :looks around to make sure no BFing nazis are listening : I HATED it!!! JIC that makes you feel better
As for the rest of this thread - http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php">  good old OBers... And a http://www.freesmileys.org/smileys.php"> to cynthemama who has posted 5 of her 6 posts in this thread. You're brave - usually newbies wait abit before jumping feet first into a thread like this
ETA  to clarify the above is *not* sarcastic and it certainly wasn't intended in a bitchy manner though I must say after going away and coming back and reading it I think it does come across that way, mores the pity. I was actually completely sincere. Its rare newbies come into a thread like this and TBH its interesting to see someone new with their POV (even when I don't agrre ). Apologies cynthemama if I made you feel bad - I hope you accept it as it was meant (now its been explained ) and stick around!-------------
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 5:48pm
Don't worry,I recentlyish had baby number 3 and I still have days where I have nooooo clue -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 7:17pm
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Not worth it. Seriously -------------  
 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 7:28pm
 ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 7:29pm
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Oooooh Boobie too late i read that!!! LOL!
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 7:41pm
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Meant every word but I just don't think it was worth stirring the pot. I'm not ashamed though :) -------------
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:16pm
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Yep this thread has been linked to BECAUSE IT'S INTERESTING. Not because people think that what people say in here is wrong. Just it's an interesting topic that makes a change from the millionth 'OMG is this an evap line?' thread which us older members have read a million times.
Whether this thread has been linked from a FB users page or a group what is the difference? I assure you that you should all be bloody thankful that there is something interesting going on for once. Cynthemama is definitely not trying to be catty. Yep I can see how it came across that way - primarily because she was requoting swear words which as the admin kindly pointed out change the tone of posts. Maya I think after the effort she went to to make sure that Bec did not misunderstand her by sharing her own details and history you could take a step back and reassess whether your comment was necessary. Personally I think that baby was probably just having a wee look and I wouldn't worry about smelling of milk. I wouldn't recommend popping the boob out though. Haha omg can you imagine? Also Babe give it a rest and get the hell off your high horse. Of course you know all about cliques. Up until a month ago you were an actively participating member of the group you are now airing such bad blood towards. Funny how you haven't mentioned that. You know who all the OB posters in this thread are. Stop being so passive aggressive about it. You are not being clever - you are just being a noo noo stinky bum :P ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Kelz
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:21pm
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Somehow fattartsrock I don't think your post will help this thread
Calling someone a dork makes the post read 'nasty' - even if you didn't mean it that way. Moving right along..... ------------- |
Posted By: Kelz
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:26pm
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One of my mothers favourite things to say when my brother was teasing his little sister (me) was "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all"....then she'd say "Now, say 3 nice things to your sister" to which my brother would reply "Ice cream, Pavolova & Strawberries" Haha. ------------- |
Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:31pm
Hehe. And it's a good rule to live by I don't always manage it... sometimes I just can't bite my tounge... but I usually regret it when I don't.-------------
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:35pm
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:shrug: I did my bit to wind the thread up but I haven't been rude (well not intentionally) or bad mannered (also not intentionally ).
FYI I only made one comment regarding cliques... Kelz thats a good tip I'll have to try it on my boys and see what they come up with
ETA deleting unnecessary wordage -------------
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Posted By: pudgy
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:37pm
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Lol fattarts ! She's right though, this IS the most interesting thing that's happened here for aaaaages.
------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Kelz
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 8:48pm
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Threads stay interesting when there is good healthy debate - once name calling and basic 'nastiness' (not sure why I always use an American accent when I say that word in my mind!) creeps in, people get bored or too scared to post.
Keep it interesting guys! Nothing wrong with good healthy respectful debate - it's helps us develop our own opinions and learn about others. ------------- |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 9:08pm
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Sorry, Dork, to me is a silly name like noo noo stinky bum or whatever, although I can see that it didn't come across that way, and my apologies for that.
Three things I like aboout Bridie. Honest Good Values Great boobs :) ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 9:58pm
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HAHAHAHAHA nawwww
ok my turn: Three things I love about Annie. Great booty (and hair )
Calls it as she sees it Loyal Ooh ooh and funny just squeezing in an extra one there hahaha...
I don't mind being a dork with great boobs...
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Posted By: rorylex
Date Posted: 27 September 2011 at 11:36pm
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lol just read the whole thread, coz im bored.
I once went to the toilet and left my baby(month old maybe) with my friend when i got back he was crying becoz he could smell milk on her and wasnt getting any, my friend who was also a bfing mum at the time, said she had considered feeding him to calm him down she was half joking but i knew she would have actually thought it too, my thought was why didnt you would have saved me some time. I not really one to think to deeply about some things and this is one of them. and dont care how anyone chooses to feed their baby as long as they are. ------------- Mummy to 4 boys Samuel - 18.6.05 Rory - 15.7.06 Mason - 13.06.08 Emmett - 24.01.10 Baby #5 - cooking |
Posted By: _Soda_
Date Posted: 28 September 2011 at 9:41am
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HAVE to pop in here and read the goss lol ok this thread is hilarious! have to say it sorry, everyone got WAAAAY too wound up by something that was just one persons opinion, could have laughed it off but noooo people had to get offended and turn it into a handbag slinging match- love it!
hehe rory i agree- was with my mate yesterday and holding her 12 week old boy who mustv smelled my milk (im BFing too) and got antsy, thought of this thread and had a giggle to myself- what would my mate have thought if shed come back in the room and id latched him on to my boob! hahaha. of course id never do it, but it does get ya thinkin- just HOW close are you to your friends? lol. (totally different situation- but in reality- if she NEEDED someone to BF her bub, like she was in hospital or something, id happily do it without a second thought!) and also tbh- if i was in my coffee group and my baby was going for another mums boobs- id probably be the type to say "flop one out and see what happens!" lol but id be JOKING..i repeat- JOKING!!!! we are pretty close in our coffee group tho (and you have to remember- some people are VERY close who have met through coffee group/AN classes etc, so in some peoples situations, saying something like that may not be that uncomfortable- like saying it to a sister or something..) but if one of them DID flop one out from my group that would be mighty awkward! tho hilarious at the same time... ------------- My little miracle 6/1/2011 My angel in Heaven 9/5/14 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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