Minor Exodus
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
Forum Description: For mums, dads, parents-to-be, grandparents, friends -- you name it! And you name the topic you want to chat about!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=40313
Printed Date: 27 August 2025 at 6:36am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Minor Exodus
Posted By: AngieBaby
Subject: Minor Exodus
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 2:39pm
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Hi Everyone.
We're really sad to have been told of some OHbaby! members who have met through OHbaby! and then created a 'secret community' on facebook. We really value you chatting here on our forums and would love for you to stay here please as we don't want new members being directed elsewhere when these forums are here for everyone to communicate. If there is anything that we could do to work on the forums to have you stay here - e.g. closed groups etc that others 'can't see' then please do let us know as we're keen to keep you with OHbaby! where you met your friends and support this family owned business. Thanks very much! Angela |
Replies:
Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 3:40pm
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I am not a member of the secret group - but i dont have a problem with it (from what i have heard they are not asking anyone else to join anyway).
However, i don't like the idea of 'secret closed' groups on the forums. It would be very off putting to new posters - these forums can appear quite cliquey as it is sometimes, especially to someone new to them. ------------- |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 3:44pm
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Thanks Catisla
I've just been looking through the posts and the conversations are being completely moved to facebook and any new people to those groups are being told to go to facebook :( (boo hoo!) If we can do better - we want to - if you can think of how this site could be improved to stop this happening - then we're keen to know - the more mums chatting here the more ideas and advice and community for all new people to draw wisdom from :) Thanks :) |
Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:03pm
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must be a different group to the one i was thinking of then - i had noticed 'general chat' was a bit quiet recently! ------------- |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:04pm
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Due in threads :) not recent ones :)
Is there anything you can think of that we can improve? Always open to making this site even better for you all ;) |
Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:08pm
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I personally dont post as much because of the censorship that has happened over the last 12 months or so. I find it much easier to post in closed fb groups because its like minded people who dont get their knickers in knots every time someone dares to have a differing opinion.. sadly there really isnt much admin can do about that (perhaps not being so quick to hit delete for the minority...). -------------   
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Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:10pm
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I don't post as much as I used to due to working full time again and that my children have grown up and I am "over" the baby and toddler stage. I will say that deleting post on the confession thread over a year ago, caused a lot of people to be angry with OhBaby! as we felt like this was our home and we could say what we wanted, then to be told those sort of posts weren't allowed made people upset over the whole thing. As for there being an exodus, I would expect that after people are over that stage of life they move onto other things. After I got married I left NZWP as I had planned my wedding, I came to OhBaby! as I had young children and now I have older children I have moved on to the next stage of my life. OhBaby! is where I met a number of woman I call friends, but as we are over the "baby" and "toddler" stage of our lives we don't post as much as we used to. ------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:19pm
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Hi Mummy of princess -
this is really good feedback thanks What if we created the ability for you to create your own group like on facebook (on our forums) that would change your mind? We could do that :) Mummy_becks thanks for your feedback :) good to know. |
Posted By: catisla
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:19pm
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ah - the 'due in thread'.
I am a member of a group of May 2011 mums that formed on facebook out of this - the main reason for setting up the group was to share photos amongst ourselves really. Once we had been posting a while we all became facebook friends - we don't use the group much at all to be honest and most o four posting is done on here. As the forums are public it is also a good place to reveal things that you wouldn't be happy sharing with just anybody, or something that you wouldn't want your boss/parents/DH to know about ------------- |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:36pm
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Thanks Catisla
Have been pm'd some feedback on just the same thing :) posting pictures :) We're just testing some new forums software at the moment that will allow people to have albums, tag people, and comment on peoples comments etc so we might be able to offer what you're looking for :) yah! If any of those groups would like to offer to test it with us that would be AWESOME! :) please pm me :) Thanks so much for the feedback and letting me know :) |
Posted By: Emmecat
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:39pm
I agree with Mamaofprinces. A closed FB group is easier in a lot of ways as you simply don't have to deal with those who take offence to every.written.word. And then there's the stalkers...... lol  -------------   http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:47pm
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Im part of a "secret" closed FB group and its not actually a group for us to sit around and be everything that OB is,eg kid related,its a bunch of Friends who met on OB most of us years ago,that have formed close friendships and for whatever reason spend more time on FB than on OB these days.
| still come on OB a fair bit,maybe not as much as I did but thats because I don't feel like I need to as much,I feel a lot more confident this time around than I did with my second,now I like to come on here to see how others are doing...but its not a "this place or that place " type scenario,the majority of us in the FB group aren't there to prove a point against OB,its just somewhere completely private for a bunch of friends to hang out and share personal joys and saddnesses that we dont want to share on OBs more public forum. ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:48pm
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Thanks Emmecat
We definitely have that ability now...So can implement it if you are interested? I just need some PM's to get them rolling :) The new forum software we will release after testing will also allow albums etc closed etc etc etc |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:50pm
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Thanks 'The Kelly'
That's really good to know.... Wwe can create an intimate group setting on OHbaby! for you if you were interested in that - just PM me :) |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 4:57pm
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Its not unrealistic to have people out grow OB and move on, FB is simply another form of social media for groups to use, I personally belong to several FB groups which are closed/secret as the members don't want the information shared publicially. Which is the one thing OB can't protect is a members privacy, as a public forum anything posted here is open for anyone to read/see. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 5:04pm
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Yep agreed caliandjack - it's just when new members to the site are told to go to facebook instead - it's a bit off :)
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Posted By: mummy_becks
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 5:35pm
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I also think if OhBaby! had of made a restricted section in the forum like it had been asked a number of times then older members may have stayed. As for the due in threads, I think it is a secrecy think people don't know they are pregnant and people are stalking the message boards to find out info on them to take back to work/family etc it could make people very uneasy about the easy access people have to the message boards.
------------- I was a puree feeder, forward facing, cot sleeping, pram pushing kind of Mum... and my kids survived! |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 5:49pm
| interesting mummy_becks :) how do you reckon we could manage that better? Make those groups closed? |
Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 6:05pm
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Its a tough one really, I like that everything is open here, I just choose how much I share as I know it is an open forum.
I found Ohbaby by doing a search on infertility and a post came up on google... If we start closing everything off then you will reduce the foot traffic as those discussions wont show up. I really dont see the problem with people setting up closed groups on fb, they still come to the other sections to discuss related topics. I guess it really comes down to what your vision of the forums are? -------------
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Posted By: Emmecat
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 6:10pm
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It's great that new software is being developed, I guess the thing with FB is that you can have groups of people with common interests other than just being due in the same month or having the same age children etc iykwim? I belong to quite a few private groups on FB and in my case (for example), many of them are AP oriented, which on a more 'mainstream' board like OB doesn't always go down well. I can't count the number of times I've seen threads get nasty because of a difference in opinion in not vaxxing/vaxxing, extended BF/FF etc..... just as an example. In the private groups I belong to, I needn't worry about someone taking my written word the wrong way or judging my parenting as we're all (more or less) parenting in that manner iykwim? ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 6:14pm
I stopped coming onto OB for a long time because of all the threads being deleted, the weird advertising rules where some people were allowed to push their business and others weren't (many times I was following threads on Kylie Cassidy Photography only to have them disappear ). There were also admin posts that I, as well as others I know, found offensive and aggressive. It all got so PC and uncomfortable that I found it easier to just go to FB. Thats just my 2c on why I left 
As for the posting in general thats a hard one coz on one hand the openess is what appeals and having groups that other members can't access might cause issues but on the other hand eeevvvveeeerybody who knows you're on OB can come have a stalk (hey mum ) so yeah will be watching interestedly to see hwo this plays out
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Posted By: Bobbie
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 6:29pm
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I think there was a period after the magazine launch where OB was trying to balance the needs of its members with the new needs of its business (page impressions and advertising) and unfortunately they failed their members.
TBH for a lot of us it got too hard. We got sick of being censored in an OTT way and our requests for some sort of privacy or protection options from randoms being ignored so we left. Yes admin were certainly aggressive and evasive at times. I personally was attacked for standing up for Kylie and that along with the random people coming in to 'fight' was pretty much it for me. I can't comment on the new groups of course but certainly for 2 of my FB groups that was the impetus for being founded. I am pleased that you are asking this. I think it is a great chance to breathe new life into this board. Edit: BTW I was linked here via FB -------------  
 
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Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 6:41pm
Oh I was linked here by an ex-OB FB group too 
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 6:54pm
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I know what you mean with the Due in FB threads, I've read some threads where all the activity happens on FB. I'm glad it's not been suggested that my new due in thread shift to FB, not everyone has FB & I wouldn't like new mama's to miss out. Yes privacy can be an issue & to address that would be hard considering the nature of forums.
I found OB via an Internet search on the TWW & I'm so glad I did, I've made some great friends & I really value that. It is disappointing that the general chat has become quiet. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: freckle
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 7:14pm
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Are you referring to the Feb 2011 group? as a new member in there was directed straight to our FB group as that is where most the talking happens now so she would never have become an interactive member there as we weren't interacting there iygwim... I can't talk for our whole DD thread, but for me I prefer FB for it's privacy and it is easier to respond to individual posts due to the group format... ------------- mum to 3 lovely girls :D |
Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 7:14pm
| The best part of OB for me is the due date threads. I also found OB on google and it has been my go-to place for baby-related stuff ever since. I'm on pregnancy #3 now and this was the first place I thought of coming to. It would be sad for other mums-to-be to lose that, its a great support system!! |
Posted By: T_Rex
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 8:14pm
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Personally, I prefer to use OB for baby discussions. I have joined the December 2009 group on FB, because there was no longer a group here, but given the choice I'd have rather stayed here.
Slightly off topic, by figured I may as well post here cos admin is reading it - where is the October 2011 thread gone? I can't see it anymore  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: WestiesGirl
Date Posted: 26 August 2011 at 10:54pm
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I like to come to OB because of the varied advice that you can get . OB was definitely my saving grace when DS was born while we were living in a different country and having no family support. I also miss the debate type threads because, although I didnt really contribute to them, they educated me on things I may have never known otherwise. For me, its a shame that some advice and opinions are taken personally or out of context and members end up leaving or dont contribute as often. But I guess thats the nature of public forums, not everyone will agree. Albeit I definitely dont agree with bullying or people being blatantly put down.
I belong to a few private FB groups that have been created from friendships built from OB. But not because I dont enjoy still coming to OB, mostly because of the privacy. I do like the idea of closed forums on OB but not all members, perhaps like the photo section for 100+ members etc. ------------- Our Angel July 08  Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived 
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Posted By: sunnyhoney
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 12:39am
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I think greater privacy/restrictions would be good. An easier chat style type of forum similar to FB would also be a time saver.
Could OB branch out to include forums for school age children and teens...? Maybe more people would stay if there were more child stages/ages catered for? ------------- Mum to: Joy Emily 1.05am 27/09/07 7lb 3oz Austin Paul 12.47pm 18/04/10 10lb 8oz |
Posted By: princesspumpkin
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 6:42am
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Our thread shifted to facebook after some crazy stalker lifted text from one of our pages, and reposted it in facebook in a bad parent witch hunt!!
It was just kind of lucky I happened to see it - and was absolutely mortified that somebody would actually bother to do such a horrible thing. Not cool seeing bits of a conversation appear online for the (super awesome) Mum involved to be sl*gged off by a bunch of strangers who had no idea of the context... Anyhow, that's where we vanished to...funnily enough nobody wanted to talk about anything once we realised we had a nasty stalker
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Posted By: karenb_chch
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 8:36am
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Our due in thread has also largely migrated to FB, largely because we like to share pics of our kids, and talk about some pretty personal stuff, and we don't want those things open to the public. We're also a lot less judgemental/more open and accepting than some of the posters that I've seen on OB. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 8:37am
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Yeah Admin i think you are seeing a conspiracy where there isnt one.
Maybe if you had listened to your members earlier though it might not have happened. Several times over the years requests have been made for more privacy and been denied. Now we have people able to sign up and not even provide a username, not a step in the right direction i would have thought. You cant stop people from making private FB groups or asking people to join them - uless of course you are planning on now not allowing FB to be mentioned on the site? Another bad example of censorship that would be! People want and need a place where they can talk about what they want and not have to be directed to "safe" discussions. A site where they arent going to find posts deleted because some unknown didnt like it or where the wrong person or business was mentioned. A site with a wide range of people with differing ideas and the ability to share thoughts and opinions freely and openly. Unfortunately i dont think that OB has been providing that place of late. |
Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 8:43am
| I'm part of a 'secret' FB group too. I too prefer the privacy and the ability to share photos and parts of our lives that need talking about but don't need to be read by every man and their dog. We too had a bit of a nutter in the thread, a newbie putting down girls we'd 'known' from the start and handing out some seriously dodgy advice. Plus we can all access FB from our phones and update throughout the day instead of once every week when we finally get a second to sit down and turn on the computer. As for the hidden forums for 100+ posts, wasnt there a thread not long ago (called random thoughts or something)where a new member basically just post whored her way to 100 posts posting one word posts etc so that doesnt make me feel any better. Also as my parenting style has evolved i have gravitated to another forum that more fits in my own philsophy. |
Posted By: Bexta
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:01am
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Yip privacy is a major thing for me too. At least with the FB group we know who the other members are. Sure there are some in our group that don't post as much but we know that they are all mums and they aren't just random people being nosey.
Another forum that I've been on (non-parenting related) you could only read the introductions thread if you weren't a member. You could see what the other threads were but if you tried to read them you got told you had to be a member. That was one of the things that surprised me with this forum, you could read anything that was posted (apart from the Gallery thread) without being a member. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Angel Baby June 2010
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Posted By: minxynzl
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:15am
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Hi Angiebaby - good of you to put the question out there :)
I think teh ability to set up a priate option on Oh Bbay would be handy. My main reason for posting in a private group is due to some of the sensitivity around some subjects we discuss. Ranging from PND to relationship issues. We noted that quite a few annonymous lurkers were viewing our converstaions yet not posting and this made us very uncomfortable. We were shocked to find that when we stopped posting a s agroup in OB and moved to a FB group that sme never before seen lurkers posted in our old OB forum asking to be added to the FB group!!!!! Very disturbing. I'm not really sure what the solution is. OB is such a great resource yet I think you can understand our concerns given what I have described above. xx ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: Jessica
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:16am
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I used to come on OB quite a bit, I have been in 3 due date threads and with my third baby I really struggled to keep up and found I could not really get to know the other mums like I had in my earlier groups, FB is just so much easier to follow conversations, see and comment on photos and I do like the privacy aspect of it as well.
I guess FB is part of my day and it is easier and quicker for me to keep up with everyone on there. I certainly feel like I have got to know the OB girls much better on FB. Often some of the discussions and groups on OB came across as quite clicky, and there is not that feeling at all on FB. ------------- 
Our con-joined boys 20 wk |
Posted By: Faffer
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:23am
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And you can drop the f-bomb on FB when its been one of those days -------------  
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Posted By: Jaune
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:24am
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I too have a bit of an issue with the privacy thing...I find it a little bit disturbing that absolutely everything comes up in a google search... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:26am
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Thanks so much everyone - appreciate all feedback. Just to note...we have taken your privacy issues on board significantly as we have been looking for a while for the right forum software to fit your requests :)
We would love for you to help us test this to see if it meets your needs and how it could be improved. Can you please pm me if you would like to test this? I am hoping you will be very happy with it :) Thanks :) |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:29am
| Oh and sunny honey yes can definitely create new forums for school aged children etc will get onto it Monday :) |
Posted By: Puddleduck
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:34am
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For myself I like the ability to reply to individual posts on FB. That is honestly the biggest thing for me, although having read some of the other concerns raised about privacy I can see the concern about that too.
If ohbaby could make some changes that would allow due groups to create closed chat with posts that can be replied to directly then I think people would stick around more. I really hope you can make these changes, ohbaby was a huge part of my pregnancy and the first 6months of motherhood - I was sad to leave my due thread here, but there has been a lot more activity in FB - mostly because of the way you can contribute easily. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: Liv
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 10:05am
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I have made so many really good friends through OB forums, so a big thank you to you guys!
My Due In Thread uses a private FB group now because its private, so we discuss far more than just babies now. It also shows posts in real time without having to refresh the page, there are no annoying signatures that take ages to load, and it is easier to make short comments, so basically we are having actual real time conversations quite often. This is much harder on OB. My suggestion would be to create something similar for future Due In threads to use if you don't want them migrating to FB, or to accept that the internet is a constantly changing and evolving place, so make your niche as the place where people can get advice and help on baby related topics, and meet others in similar situations, even if they do end up moving on to FB as private groups. Without you we could never have met. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 10:07am
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Hi puddle duck - thanks...yep I think we can do this :)
Would you like to be a tester? |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 10:21am
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Thanks Liv
We will always try our best to keep the site meeting the changing technology and needs of you all :) especially now we have our own web developer :) so hopefully the new system will fulfill these needs (and more?!) if you would like to test and feedback also- we'd love your thoughts! |
Posted By: Kels
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 10:21am
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I do understand about what you mean about redirecting new members to FB but as I see the due date pages on FB that is all they are. There is a wealth of info on OB for people to come back to and im sure once people have stopped working fulltime they will have more time to come back here. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Busy mum to Miss 15yrs, Miss 10yrs and Master 4yrs |
Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 12:10pm
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Just randomly something else I've noticed - I'm in the May due date thread and except for us May mums nobody else has posted. With my last 2 pregnancies there have been lots of random people popping in to congratulate and comment but this time nada. The personal touch I found at OB has disappeared IMO... Of course it could be that 2 people are relative newbies and I have a new username so people just aren't bothering since nobody 'knows' us but i think its sad. The air of celebration, where everyone is excited and interested has gone. ------------- Megapunkster DOB July 2007 Minipunkster DOB Feb 2010 BabyPunkster DUE May 2012 Making out with the PunkMaster for 4 years and counting <3 |
Posted By: salz
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 1:29pm
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Im stuck between the two. I have had to join the private FB due thread which is working really well. You feel a real sense of togetherness there with being able to share very personal experiences and give/receive support without lurkers reading in too.
On the other hand I am a lurker too and found it truely inspirational reading experiences from other people in the variety of threads on Oh baby. Sadly there are some weird people out there that stalk so have made the FB a better option. It is a hard one. I did meet some lovely people on OB so THank YOu ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: lilfatty
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 1:36pm
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I've seen due in threads that direct people straight to FB which is quite sad. Ive lost track of most of my due in group as they have a private FB group now which I am not a part of.
I do agree though that people outgrow OB this place was a huge part of my life when I was pg and during the first year of Issys life but as Im an "old hand" now I dont have anything in common with most people around the boards now. And honestly .. after a few years some of the "newbie" questions that come up over and over and over again drive you nutty ;) I keep in touch with the friends I have made on here on FB and stop by every so often when a link is posted on there. ------------- Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months) I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year  http://www.femininefitness.co.nz/category/blog - LFs weight blog
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Posted By: sunnyhoney
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 4:28pm
I actually agree with you this time Bizzy
Well said. ------------- Mum to: Joy Emily 1.05am 27/09/07 7lb 3oz Austin Paul 12.47pm 18/04/10 10lb 8oz |
Bizzy wrote:Posted By: Whateversville
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 5:23pm
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I joined ohbaby knowing full well it was a public forum therefore what I post I post knowing it can come up in a google search. Privacy isn't a big deal to me because I know the site isn't private.
My due in did make a fb ages ago but we don't use it. Most of our group packed a tanty about something else and left ages ago. I am part of a private fb group that's a mixture of OB and treasures members. I Think it's pretty stink telling newbies to join them on fb tho, there is lots of info here on OB they could miss cos their due in is only on fb, but I guess it's up to them if they decide to be on both. Also, the guest usernames are creepy and annoying......just saying 
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Posted By: peaceandlove
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 5:45pm
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Doesn't sounds like they think it's a conspiracy theory to me? Seems simple...OHbaby! Provides a site where we can connect with others and share experiences and now people have been told to go to Facebook instead for this even if they are new to OHbaby!
I think OHbaby! Is being reasonable in asking us to not direct new people to secret Facebook pages, especially if us being here enables OHbaby! To be in business and do what they do. From what I read in Admins first post, they are happy to work with us on what we want changed so why not tell them and support the Nz company that has brought us together. I love this site and love supporting NZ businesses not making Facebook richer - which btw I am not a member. |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 6:01pm
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Thanks lilfatty (sounds wrong to say that :) ) what sort of questions do newbies have that is reocirribg. We could put a forum q and a up to help with some questions if that helps?
Thanks pillow fight will get onto the guest name issue. Do you all prefer a forum handle or would you prefer your name like on Facebook? Just a thought - but good to know... Thanks peace an love on your thoughts - appreciate your understanding. |
Posted By: Kupukupu
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 6:17pm
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I also belong to a FB group for one of the due threads. I am extremely disappointed in Admin to see that you have deleted the original due thread?? Pretty childish to do that whilst asking for suggestions and appearing to want to be inclusive??
The main reason our group was set up was for privacy- this seems to be the common theme in this thread too. We are able to control who sees our photos, info and conversations and only those who really should be privy to that info are privy to it. We share photos and stories about ourselves that would never happen on such an public forum as OB. HOWEVER many of us still pop over here to participate in all the other forums we are interested in- I certainly have a read whenever I have time and will happily post (if I don't have to share too much personal info). The other issue (which has already been raised) is the usability- FB group conversations making it a lot easier to read, comment & catch-up which is important on fast moving groups such as Due groups. I hope you can get some good feedback out of this and move on and improve the forums but I do think you have thrown the toys out of the cot deleting existing threads. We have not moved to FB to spite OB, it is to protect our privacy since this is something you did not provide. |
Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 6:53pm
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I'd just like to add to kupukupu's post (now that I have calmed down a little after realising our thread had been removed). We did not actively seek to send people away from OhBaby and over to facebook, we just didnt want to exclude any newbies who might be in need of the great support a group can offer. How bad would it look to OB to have a newbie come across the thread and have NO interaction of ANY sort. As Kupukupu said...we did not move BECAUSE of OB...FB is just easier.
I have been thinking a lot on this and havent posted till now because I dont like the backlash you get if your opinion is different to someone elses. I just wonder if OhBaby has peaked. When I first joined in 2007 it was a thriving little community. FB did not exist. So I wonder if that group of very active chatters that were interacting back then have finally reached the end of their time with OB and newer members have always had FB as well so there is more competition for their time. FB wins! simple as that. We would very much appreciate our thread being reinstated.....to say its pissed me off is an understatement! |
Posted By: Richtea
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 6:56pm
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Hey Kupukupu are you sure it han't just been hidden as no e as posted in a while?
I thing a handle is better if it is a public site with option of displaying real name with certain posts. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 6:58pm
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Richtea, I thought that too..till I looked under Due in 2011 and there was NOTHING there..every month but and it was there just a few days ago when a newbie posted.
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Posted By: Whateversville
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 7:04pm
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If youre talking about sept 11 it's there. You have to chose "from the year" and it appears at the bottom
Ya kno, cos no one has posted in so long. I just checked |
Posted By: seysey
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 7:08pm
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I am part of a facebook page that I joined through my comments on here. I have to say that when my midwife asked if it was me asking questions about midwifes on here as she had googled her name and my post had come up I was a bit shocked but I guess I should have known better as it was is a public forum.
I personally have not posted much in the other threads as I have found the experience quite intimidating for a first time mum with some very intense opinions expressed... and just some mean comments. My facebook group were just a lot more welcoming... and it easier to keep up to date... ------------- http://www.TickerFactory.com/"> 
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Posted By: Mrs_B
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 7:22pm
Rizzie1 posted on the 23rd so not that long ago. Odd to see "Edited by AngieBaby on 26 August 2011 at 3:41pm"on the bottom on her post 
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Posted By: Whateversville
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 7:24pm
| Yea, maybe that's why the post doesn't count? Cos the post before that was July |
Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 8:09pm
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Pillow_fight, I'd say the thread was removed and has since been put back. Its a bit pissy to see that people's posts have been edited. What kind of world do we live in? If it annoyed admin so much then why didnt they just give a "friendly warning".
I think this thread is going a long way to sealing the fate of OB in a lot of people's minds. It is just not as supportive as it used to be. You shouldnt have to worry if your post is "allowed" or not and will it be removed. |
Posted By: Whateversville
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 8:52pm
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I highly doubt they would delete a due in group just cos no one really posted anymore.
Could be wrong tho. |
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:15pm
Definitely not names. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com">
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 27 August 2011 at 9:43pm
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For me, it was the censorship, the you can't say that stuff. And the privacy. I also don't like that it alll comes up in a google search..cos somestimes you just *need* to vent and online seems "safer"....
Also, mine are now 6 and amost 5 and I feel like there isn't much here for me now, and my advice is ignored cos it's "ages" since I had a baby so I must have forgotten or things are different now.... ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: Kupukupu
Date Posted: 28 August 2011 at 12:05am
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pillow_fight- I can tell you that absolutely, due in Sept was not there this evening when I posted (I'm not the only one who noticed)- admin must have hidden it from view (as opposed to deleting it completely) and have obviously bought it back into view after my post.
And actually there are some posts missing from that thread (not only the edits) so admin have done their thing on the thread and put it back up... which is cool... its their message board. Just want to clarify that we are not a bunch of nutters imagining it! 
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Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 28 August 2011 at 7:48am
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Yeah the censorship has gotten to the point of ridiculous! If you want to have an open forum, admin, then be prepared to not like everything we post. If you're going to delete our posts or entire threads then be prepared for people to be thoroughly f**ked off and not want to stay here. I agree with peanut butter, in 2007 this was a thriving little community where we talked about varied and interesting topics that challenged you to think beyond your own viewpoint. Now its somewhat repetitive, boring and of course censored.
You sticky threads of your own but threads that members have asked and asked to have stickied are ignored and subsequently often lost, you don't allow conversations about WAHM business' i.e threads trying to organise people to meet up for a photography shoot by Kylie Cassidy (organising these family oriented things is what the forums are *suppose* to be for), you ignore numerous requests for privacy, new forum sections, etc then suddenly realise you've screwed up and rush around like ducks shot in the arse attempting to placate people though from the sounds of the above due date thread you're only willing to do as much as is required to keep the site ticking over and you STILL don't seem to realise that interfering, deleting and editing members posts is inappropriate and IMO disgusting. We're not a bunch of kids FFS we're adults and we do expect a level of respect. Rant over for now...
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Posted By: blossombaby
Date Posted: 28 August 2011 at 8:10am
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Just had a look at .. the due date threads seems a shame really because i have a sept10 baby and used to really enjoy lurking on the month before or a couple of month ahead to see what to expect or to find a answer for something eg my dd is not the only nearly 1year old that doesn't sleep thru the night or 12 hours either. When i joined here it was a humming hive .. the genreal boards also had sometihng exciting and to be honest its where I learn't a hugeeeeeee range of y parenting eg blw, co sleeping etc even about woolworth online shopping!!!!! seems alot of ladies coming wont have that advice now because everyones gone to fbook? I guess when you post on forum you know its semi public i agree about taking it off google search however that is the way i found it "signs when pregnant" hahaha ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: millymollymandy
Date Posted: 28 August 2011 at 1:18pm
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I'm a member of both a secret FB group and this forum. I use them for different purposes, one to ask questions of a general nature and the other to share information that's more personal and a bit more "stream of consciousness" type stuff.
TBH - I don't post on here much as I don't have quite so many questions anymore. I also find that I lot the advice doesn't really fit with my parenting philosophy and I probably am more confident in my own views and instinct these days too. Like most people I find the lack of privacy an issue. I accept that this is public, but I do find the private forum far more useful. NZ is a small place and its very easy to find out personal details of people you know and their children on this forum and I think it does open you up to exploitation of unscrupulous types. |
Posted By: KiwiL
Date Posted: 28 August 2011 at 11:06pm
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I haven't read all the comments, but for me I have joined FB groups because I can then 'socialise' more with the people I am actually friends with - in more of a 'real life' setting. FB allows you to get to know people better than on the forums.
I also find it a bit easier to use FB groups because I am on FB a lot any way. I still use OhBaby but, to be honest, fairly infrequently. I tend to come here if I have a question that I need help with and want to hit a wider audience. Unfortunately, that's actually a fairly selfish thing because I come here for help but I am not around enough to really be helping others IYKWIM. The privacy thing has bothered me too and I stopped putting photos on OhBaby quite a while ago. I also was frustrated with the censorship of certain posts/topics, and upset when all posts about Kylie and her photography were shut down. In addition, there have been two things happen on here that have really made me lose faith in the site. The first was the disappearance of the September 2008 thread. One day it just randomly disappeared and we lost about 18 months of conversation and friendship. For me, I will never be able to look back on posts from that early time in my parenting journey. When the issue was raised with OB, it didn't really feel like anyone cared about it and certainly no real effort seemed to be made to try to get the thread back. We were told that no back ups were ever done and I have always remained dubious about this... and if in fact that IS the case, then I find that disappointing. The second thing was an issue that I raised with you recently Angela. I hope you'll remember what it was, because I did say that I wouldn't make it public... Your response to me was great and you said that a fix was going to be implemented within a few days. But I see that that never happened and the issue still remains exactly as it was. And as someone who was directly affected by it , I really lost faith that this site cares much about its forum members... and for that reason I have really backed away even more from OhBaby. |
Posted By: PorterLou
Date Posted: 29 August 2011 at 6:47pm
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I'm not yet a mama (but hopefully will be soon) so I'm still in the "Planning" section. I'm not on facebook so I'd be pretty disappointed if, when the time came, my thread headed off to fb. Actually, I probably wouldn't, I'd probably continue to post in my due in thread, and have my own little conversations with myself.
If you want to join ohbaby, then post on the forums, then do so; and if you want to be on fb and post there then do that instead. Or as well. But I don't think its fair to leverage one off the other. I don't really have any bad experiences to share - just that I joined knowing full well this is a public forum, so if I don't want people knowing too many details, then I don't post too many details - it is possible to be relatively anonymous. And I know that two of my sisters are on here, so they're quite probably stalking me too (I know I posted "happy birthday" messages for them!!) - but its a trust thing - if they read something I assume it stays between us (and certainly does not get back to our mother!). Its kind of common sense, I think, if you don't really want people reading what you write, then you probably shouldn't say it in this forum. If OB can facilitate a little more privacy, then great. I think everyone needs to remember, though, that this is the internet, and nothing, including facebook, is EVER completely private. Like all those 3rd party companies that are able to obtain your details from Facebook (how else do you think they make their money). -------------   
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Posted By: MaryLou111
Date Posted: 29 August 2011 at 7:28pm
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I'm a member of one of the secret groups and the reasons why they work better than the OB forum is as follows:
1. I tried to register about 3 times without success on the OB forum group. I could only register once I stopped using Mozilla and used the Explorer browser - which is not my normal browser. 2. I wouldn't feel comfortable discussing what we do and sharing the pictures in a public forum. 4. The OB forum doesn't group the topics together (eg you just get one large forum and the discussion topics seem to get mixed up). The forum seems very clumsy compared with the FB group. 5. I can check my FB and update on my phone with the FB application. This is not available for the OB forum. I'm regularly updating on my phone during the day (lunchtime, morning tea break etc) as I'm not allowed to access internet at work for personal use. I still do look through the OB forum, and regularly use the OB website. |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 30 August 2011 at 11:51am
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I am part of a few groups over on FB that have/had originated from here. One is just a chat group, one is a coffee group and another is a sharing group. I think the thing is that people move on from all aspects of life. My DD thread used to be a thriving place with maybe 3-4 pages worth of chat a day but now as our babies have grown, some mums have returned to work, others are having their second babies and so we're lucky if we get 1 post a day now!
I do think that privacy is an issue. I used to share quite a bit but now I have really shut down on how much info I share on here and on Facebook. I like that on FB I can choose who I share info with and I don't have to worry about who may read it. Sure I know this is a public forum and if I don't want every Tom, Dik and Harry knowing my business then I don't have to share it but sometimes I need advice and then what are we to do? I am pretty sure admin have mentioned a few times about us being able to friend people and limiting who we share info with as well as the privacy thing. I guess another thing to remember is that this forum is pretty diverse and others are so set in their ways that they attack anyone who begs to differ. There are many forums out there for parenting. I have been on about 2 others and I know other OB mums who are on there too. TBH I do think it is sad that people are choosing to move their DD thread chats over to FB as I loved my Feb 10 group and am rather sad that it's kinda died now but I did stop posting as I was parenting a bit differently so didn't really feel I could contribute much. Anyway if I had another I don't know what I'd do. It was nice when I was pregnant to go in threads before my DD to see what they were experiencing as well as threads after my DD to share things I had been through and that they were normal or should get checked out etc. That's really gone now imo. Perhaps there could be someway to make those very private from outsiders and limit it to those that are pregnant and not need x amount of posts to enter because you do get people that comment on every thread and then get 100 posts so they can nosey in the Photo Gallery. I like the idea of real names but at the same time I like the annonimity of forum handles. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 30 August 2011 at 2:48pm
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I think making OB like FB isn't the answer. They serve two very different purposes. I have loads of OB people on my FB friends list that I've added over 4 years now and if OB changed and I was blocked from interacting with people then I would miss those opportunities to help, get help and make connections.
I do think there needs to be more than just signing up and you're in though. There needs to be email verification and I think the forums should be blcoked from google searching. There are surely enough articles related to the magazine part of the site that will draw people through google without our conversations being quite so public. Is there a way to add chatroom functions to due date threads to make it more instantaneous? And possibly have moderators on sections that want to be even more private i.e due date threads, so that first you sign up to the forums, then you have another gateway to be checked? Lol not doing a great job of explaining the concept in my head here... Admin you were interacting with us a couple of pages back but you've gone quiet? Is this a thread where we're all participating or not? ------------- Megapunkster DOB July 2007 Minipunkster DOB Feb 2010 BabyPunkster DUE May 2012 Making out with the PunkMaster for 4 years and counting <3 |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 30 August 2011 at 6:50pm
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Agree with Bomama! Was what I was trying to say but couldn't word it! I think having to prove you are UTD is a bit hard/harsh but yeah... ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 30 August 2011 at 6:51pm
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I also reckon some of the TTC mums may like some privacy too but hey I'm not really one so can't talk for all of them but when I was briefly I know I did worry who might 'find' me etc because we never told anyone irl that we were thinking about TTC #2. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 30 August 2011 at 7:46pm
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I don't think its even necessary to prove you're UTD, just a regularly contributing member of the forum? so first gateway (signing up) gets you to the main threads i.e general pregnancy threads, general thread, etc then once you have a certain number of posts you can apply to go through second gateway (moderator to check you haven't just made one word posts to score) to get into due date threads or whatever. Stalkers have been a major issue on OB so I think this two-fold kind of system would make everything that bit more secure and comforting for people on here. There are enough sections that are suitable to public to get people posting IMO. Just something to consider... If you're still reading this of course admin ------------- Megapunkster DOB July 2007 Minipunkster DOB Feb 2010 BabyPunkster DUE May 2012 Making out with the PunkMaster for 4 years and counting <3 |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 30 August 2011 at 8:38pm
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Yep still reading :)
Definitely taking all on board thanks! Hey! Can I ask if there are issues or requests that they are emailed to me or info@ohbaby.co.Nz as we aren't on the forums here often - we prefer to leave you to it :) so we may miss comments and requests that come up in the forums - just in case you think we are always watching :) we really aren't. So please do email us requests so we don't miss them :) Gotta take the good with the bad on board here and just try and do better for you all :) Appreciate you all! Cheers |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 30 August 2011 at 8:48pm
| Just read page 3. We haven't deleted any threads. So can you give me details and we will look into this thanks :) |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 10:06am
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Yeah that's a good idea bomama! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 10:10am
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I just checked and those threads are there - my developer has advised nothing has changed nothing was deleted etc - so wewondered if it was just that the SHOW TOPICS box at the top of the section had 'from last..2 weeks" selected or a time period in which noone had posted in those threads :)
HOpe that helps :) |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 10:14am
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Bomama
can we nut out this idea.... with some whatifs for you all to help with. What if I was pregnant and I ONLY wanted to chat in the due in threads? and I was a new member because it's my first baby - how would I get to be a part of the due in threads? |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 10:22am
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What about doing to due in threads for each month.
due in March 2012 and due in March 2012 protected and those that want to be 'protected' have to 'apply' |
Posted By: shellgirl
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 1:09pm
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When I first joined I only chatted in my due in thread so I wouldn't have wanted to have to have to post in other threads first to have to get there (other than perhaps the introduction thread). I think that would stop a lot of people joining up. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 1:21pm
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Yes that's what we're thinking Shell girl :)
hmmm so what shall we do any other ideas lovelies? |
Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 2:12pm
Yeah I did think about that coz I went straight for my due date thread and hid in there for awhile when I joined. I have been thinking more about it though. What about a requirement to have a minimum of posts within a certain amount of time or your privileges to see things get blocked?? So for example 2 weeks to get to 30 posts in the private threads i.e due dates/ttc(not hard they're a chatty bunch  works out at just over one post a day) or you lose the ability to see anything more than the most public threads?? That would help with the stalker issue specially if to join originally they signed up and had an email sent to them that they had to click to activate ensuring real email accounts.
Also I've seen in some forums a requirement to post in the introduction thread before you have access to any others. That would create more transparent boards wouldn't it? Things definitely need adjusting but this is too good a resource to lose IMO so I want to help if I can - though some of my ideas might be abit of the wall
ETA forgot a word ------------- Megapunkster DOB July 2007 Minipunkster DOB Feb 2010 BabyPunkster DUE May 2012 Making out with the PunkMaster for 4 years and counting <3 |
Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 2:14pm
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Oh and IMO splitting the due dates defeats the purpose slightly and will possibly make it more confusing for newbies. I know it took me awhile to map out the forums when I first 'arrived'.
HTH Angela! ------------- Megapunkster DOB July 2007 Minipunkster DOB Feb 2010 BabyPunkster DUE May 2012 Making out with the PunkMaster for 4 years and counting <3 |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 2:22pm
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Thanks Bomama
I'm wondering if to get into the due in forums you need to enter your name and due date - and that we get moderators to approve their 'entry' we'd need enough moderators in each due in to ensure it wouldn't take ages to approve them getting in and we'd know if they're legit? do you think we'd have some volunteers to moderate? |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 3:43pm
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Yeah your last post was more my thinking and I like Bomamas idea of a time frame for posts. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 4:12pm
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that wouldn't be a bad idea, considering we've had a number of fake pregnancies pop up in the due date forums ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 4:23pm
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why dont you just make it mandatory to post in the introduction thread and thenpost where you want. Maybe having a restricted section for people to talk about whatever they want ... the restricted section could be something you have to apply for and the criteria could be not just post amounts but how long you have been a member for. Then if you stop the stuff from the due in threads showing up in a Google search that would help too. Also make only the General section able to be viewed by the public, or general and recipes and gardening - stuff like that. the rest you will actually have to be a proper member who has signed up and with a proper username not guest_0000. It surely cant be that hard to make stuff not acessible to the public to read everything! ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 4:24pm
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Gah double post!
You dont want it too hard for people to join, or else they wont bother. and asking for a due date isnt really going to stop the fakers and nutjobs! ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: BoMama
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 4:26pm
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Yup due date and name is a good idea, but I still vote for a mandatory introduction thread. I think moderators shouldn't be too hard to find, I'd hope not anyway. No point in complaining about the problem if you aren't willing to be part of the solution right? Or did I quote that wrong? Anyway will be interesting to see how it all pans out!
------------- Megapunkster DOB July 2007 Minipunkster DOB Feb 2010 BabyPunkster DUE May 2012 Making out with the PunkMaster for 4 years and counting <3 |
Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 5:46pm
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Good idea Bizzy and Bomama.
Will be working on this - it won't happen over night but it will happen soon. Hey new forums ready to test. Who's up for it? |
Posted By: millymollymandy
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 6:22pm
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Has any thought been given to functionality with new forums? The beauty of FB to be honest is that you can store stuff like, birth stories etc, which you many not want to share with all and which tend to get lost in a forum setting.
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 6:38pm
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The blogs? You can blog it on here MMM? ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 7:00pm
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MMM true but the point is that FB and OB serve different purposes and they're both used by most people on here. FB doesn't offer the same opportunities to meet people that OB does while FB doesn't offer the face to face contact I get on skype. Its just about streamlining OB to be more in line with its target market IMO, not changing it to provide everything another social application already does. Thats what I think anyway In saying that I guess if there was the option to store things on your account and be able to 'friend' people who would then have access that would be cool. DS1s birth story got lost when our old thread got redone - it was one of a few posts that must have been dropped in between changing over from a due date thread to a babies born in thread. I was (and still am actually) really gutted as it was the only record I was able to put down. It wasn't OBs fault, at the time the admins did all they could to help me track it but it was a no go So an account that gave you the option of adding birth stories, keeping a pregnancy/baby journal online, they would definitely be features I would use! Ok so I talked myself round right there haha...
Nicky its up the top next to the forums tab -------------   
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Posted By: Kellz
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 7:03pm
Angela- Im happy to try out new forums- Ive been here a very long time- like 5yrs, and wont be going anywhere else anytime soon 
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Posted By: AngieBaby
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 7:16pm
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Awesome thanks ladies. Thanks Kellz keen for your help.
We are thinking of developing blogs a little further too - just all takes time! Wish I could make it all happen now :) so watch this space :) When I am back in office tomorrow I'll message those who have volunteered for new forum testing - it's basic at the moment but as you chat with Matthew he will develop it further :) |
Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 31 August 2011 at 7:21pm
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Oooh oooh I want to try forums tooooo please I love new stuff... Ditto to Kellz - I've been here for 4.5 years and no plans to disappear (unless its coz I'm a dick and mess up my sign-in details again ) anytime soon! -------------
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Posted By: skiltz
Date Posted: 01 September 2011 at 4:17pm
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NEW FORUM TESTING
We have setup a new forum system to help us determine if it does what we need it to. The current forum is VERY old so writing new functionality is very hard and very time consuming. We hope that the new system will be 90% what we need and then develop anything thats missing. First we need to check it works :) You can access the TEST forum by going to http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/yaf/ - http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/yaf/ If you are already logged into OHbaby! you should be logged into the new forum also, otherwise please login using www.ohbaby.co.nz/login (any new members since yesterday will not work) Its VERY unpolished. We have imported all old posts and users to help understand what the limitations are. All new posts will be deleted, so don't write anything you want to keep :) Please post all likes/dislikes here or on the new forums. Comments/Feedback welcome as always. NONE of the privacy ideas above have yet been implemented as we need to check the system as whole a works first. Thanks to everyone who takes the time to test or browse around. Thanks, Matthew |