Evening unsettled baby
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Topic: Evening unsettled baby
Posted By: Sporty1977
Subject: Evening unsettled baby
Date Posted: 06 August 2011 at 8:36pm
| My DD is 1 month on monday and has been a star till this week. She regularly does 3 hour breast feeds through the day, but snacks from about 5pm onwards. She self settles 99% of the time through the day. She was doing 5 hours at night sleeping folowed by 3 hours, however she is now 3 hours all the time day and night, thi sI can handle, however when I put her to bed at night - same routine, same bed, same location etc at night she just wont self settle. Yest I had a grizzly baby from 6-11pm..... I have just left her to cry now, but what I hear is a continuous high pitch cry, not a sstart stop cry. I thought a start stop cry was the one to leave and a continuous scream was not to be ignored (some book I read said that!), she has clean nappy etc..... any ideas why/what this is? |
Replies:
Posted By: Nothing
Date Posted: 06 August 2011 at 8:43pm
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Its normal for young babies to be unsettled in the evening. She is too young to expect her to self settle all the time. Forget the books and go with your instincts. Go pick her up give her a cuddle and offer her the boob. ------------- 
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Posted By: mothermercury
Date Posted: 06 August 2011 at 8:47pm
I would not leave her to cry, especially not so young. I would go and pick her up and give her whatever she needs at this age. Unfortunately evening can be a grizzly time for a lot of babies and it's something they grow out of over time.  Although I think sometimes you can never find a reason - it's just something that happens with little babies. It won't last forever!
Can you wear her in a wrap or push her around in the pram? Those both used to work for us (sometimes!) in getting baby to calm down. |
Posted By: CJsays
Date Posted: 06 August 2011 at 10:21pm
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i agree with the others, give her a cuddle n a feed, i found that E would want to feed 3x between 5pm and 8pm at that age, sometimes more. they definitely grow out of it, very frustrating at the time though. E was also in a routine of feed every 4 hours etc from coming out of the neonatal unit, but that went out the window a few weeks after when she hit the evening terrors! personally i never left E to cry at 1 month, i only found her cries started to get more recognisable after 6 weeks, but every baby is different. even when i knew it was a grizzle i would rarely leave her for more than 5 mins till she was older. they change so much, go with the flow, cuddle her and give her food as needed and she will change again as needed, great you know she can do a 5hour stint though, it will happen again! could also be a wee growth spurt? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 07 August 2011 at 9:06am
| Agree with all the above. Could be having a growth spurt, too, they have a few in the early days. DS always did his growth spurt feeding in the evening + night, he was always too busy during the day even at that young age. There is also a thing called 'evening colic' which you might want to check out. I wouldnt be leaving her to cry so young, she'll probably just get more and more upset and be harder to settle in the long run. |
Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 07 August 2011 at 9:16am
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Jacob was like that too. It seems to be really common for little babies to want to stay up late and be grumpy while they're at it. Jacob just slowly grew out of it, and now goes to bed at a very respectable 7pm (and has for a long time). -------------   
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Posted By: Danda08
Date Posted: 07 August 2011 at 10:19am
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Agree with all the others. Late afternoons/evenings can be tough with the grizzling and cluster feeding.
I used to put my girls in a vibrating rocker and sit them by a window, that often kept them calm for a decent period of time. And I highly recommend a Moby wrap, that way you can be hands free to get on with some dinner etc. It can be quite frustrating but make the most of this time, it goes so fast and soon you'll wish your wee terror would just snuggle into you  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 07 August 2011 at 10:37am
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Give her as much cuddles and help to settle as you can if its too much get your partner to help. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 07 August 2011 at 12:22pm
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Babies cluster feed in the evenings, get dinner prepared as early as possibly, then get DH to cook it when he gets home while you sit on the couch & cuddle & feed your baby. It's their way of boosting your milk supply in time for growth spurts etc.
funnily just found a link that says the same thing  http://www.lactivist.com/evencluster.html - Cluster feeding ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: Sporty1977
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 7:49am
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thanks for everything. I have been doing this - as you say above, but my hubby works nights so Im home alone plus have a 19 month old.....so I do get dinner ready early, but when I bath, feed and put the 19 month old to sleep I have to let the newborn grizzle...
oh and a noisey baby at night - wow my DS was silent but my DD sleeps so grunty, snuffly, noisey - sound like Anna Kournikova playing tennis...Im going to have to sleep with her in the spare room so my hubby can get some sleep, she is too young I feel to put in a room on her own |
Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:37am
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My baby was the same, cried all evening from about 4pm and would only ever feed to sleep.
You'll be happy to know that he now is a happy wee guy (most of the time) and goes down to bed awake between 6.30 & 7 without a sound. I've never left him to cry (but understand with another child you have no choice sometimes) and it didn't create any problems here, he still self settles ok. In saying that I can only put him down for the evening awake, during the day I have to feed him to sleep. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Sporty1977
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 9:12am
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my DS is 19 months and have self settled on and off, but only now he goes down everytime every sleep - if I need I have to shut the door, he cries for a few seconds then will hop into bed and sleep/rest. But with 2 under 1 1/2 I can rock/feed them both to sleep!! DD seems to be ok 90% of the time self settling at day sleeps just that grumpy grizzly stage at night, which would be fine if I had no other kid!!! ;-)
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Posted By: SpecialK
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 3:41pm
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I found a bottle of EBM/formula in the afternoon did wonders for getting bub to go through the afternoon and early evening drama free while you sort the toddler out. The only tricky part is finding the time to express. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 6:50pm
| Must be tricky managing two like that at the same time, obviously i have no idea what thats like so my advice is a bit lame, but i'd second the suggestion of a moby wrap - you can breastfeed easily in them, so you could feed DD while dealing with DS and dinner etc. |
Posted By: millymollymandy
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:04pm
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I had a baby that was exactly the same, evenings were a nightmare. Mostly I'd just feed her up till she crashed out!I would definitely get some kind of baby carrier put her in so you can manage your toddler and get them to bed. Oddly DD was a very noisy baby too and went into her own room at 2 weeks so we could get some sleep.
She grew out of it though and now at 2 goes to bed like a dream at 7pm and normally sleeps 12 hours. Am full expecting number two to do the same thing as well, will be surprised if they settle. |
Posted By: millymollymandy
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:05pm
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I had a baby that was exactly the same, evenings were a nightmare. Mostly I'd just feed her up till she crashed out!I would definitely get some kind of baby carrier put her in so you can manage your toddler and get them to bed. Oddly DD was a very noisy baby too and went into her own room at 2 weeks so we could get some sleep.
She grew out of it though and now at 2 goes to bed like a dream at 7pm and normally sleeps 12 hours. Am full expecting number two to do the same thing as well, will be surprised if they settle. |
Posted By: millymollymandy
Date Posted: 08 August 2011 at 8:08pm
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I had a baby that was exactly the same, evenings were a nightmare. Mostly I'd just feed her up till she crashed out!I would definitely get some kind of baby carrier put her in so you can manage your toddler and get them to bed. Oddly DD was a very noisy baby too and went into her own room at 2 weeks so we could get some sleep.
She grew out of it though and now at 2 goes to bed like a dream at 7pm and normally sleeps 12 hours. Am full expecting number two to do the same thing as well, will be surprised if they settle. |
Posted By: buzylizy
Date Posted: 11 August 2011 at 12:21pm
| They take some time when they are this small to get into the night time routine. My son did the same for a month or two. Figure out what makes her settle and do that. My son was keen on soft music and his dummy. Worked a charm. And when it was time to give up both it was only 2 nights of crazy. Be kind to yourself and baby and read the books and take what works and discard what doesn't. Don't let anyone tell you do this or don't do that. Find what works for you, the time goes by so quickly and when baby is 2 you won't even remember it. |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 11 August 2011 at 1:20pm
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maybe change the older ones routine for a bit till baby settles back down. Make morning time bath time, and that way you wont have to hurry to get back to a screaming baby and you both might enjoy it more... Or maybe you could try putting the baby in the bath too and see if a warm bath helps settle for a while. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 11 August 2011 at 2:35pm
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My son was 20 months when my daughter was born,and thats what I did (Bizzy's suggestion)just changed a few things to make life easier for myself.
Sometimes a bit of grizzling from one or the other,or both...or from me ,was unavoidable.
I do agree that she is too young to expect to self settle,shes only a month old,still getting used to the big wide world,she'll get there in the end,these early days the change their patterns like Auckland changes its weather ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Sporty1977
Date Posted: 13 August 2011 at 3:19pm
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thanks ladies, I have just taken a chill pill and go with the flow. Sometimes dd has to cry a little while I settle ds then I go back to dd. Would like to keep ds routine as similiar as it has been as possible and is works well for him. dd is 5 weeks next week and things are falling into place more daily. thanks
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Posted By: MrsEmma
Date Posted: 14 August 2011 at 4:59am
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Sporty1977 I don't have much advice but you are not alone!
DD is great at self settling and sleeping until I put her down at the 4/5pm time where she will only ever cat nap which is really hard when I am organising DS and as they are not quite 15 months apart, that time of the evening can be extremely difficult, especially when DH is away for work. She is also a 3-hourly feeder, like clockwork - on time every time :-) DS also likes his routine of bath at night so if DD is unsettled I either put her in the manduca while I do dinner, bath etc or put her in her bouncer and bring her into each room with me and she's usually fine so long as she's able to see us. I guess the main way I 'cope' with it when I'm alone is just do what makes her happy, if she just will not sleep then I get her up, if she is hungry (which usually she isn't) I feed her, if she just wants to be up and joining in the chatter at dinner time and the giggles and splashes in the bathroom with DS and I (which us usually the case as she will just sit there with a big smile on her face when she's with us) then that's what I do to make her happy. It was hard for me to get out of the 'but she should be...' or 'but she needs to be...' mentality, as I'm a planner/routine person by nature but I had to just relax and go with it as you are doing
All the best! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Sporty1977
Date Posted: 15 August 2011 at 9:58pm
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totally agree - thanks
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