bringing up baby
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Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=39614
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Topic: bringing up baby
Posted By: rorylex
Subject: bringing up baby
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 2:00pm
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anyone seen this progam on the living channel???
for those who havent seen it, it looks at a few couples who have newborns over the 1st 6wks or so and they are all folloing one of 3 different parenting guides. all lead by woman who are advocates on these techniques(sp). the three techniques is -The Dr spock meathod(a more relaxed approach based on parents' instincts) -The Truby King method (a strict, routine meathod) -the Continuum concept (in which babies are in constant contact with a parent at all times, based on tribal child-rearing methods) It got me thinking about which one I most relate to and I am proberbly inbetween Dr Spock and Continuum, I wear my babies for the 1st 6mths-1yr and co sleep while baby is waking for feeds at night and breastfeed them. but I also am not strictly baby has to be in mine or dh's arms at all time, I read babies ques and put to sleep in own bed during the day awake. im at the point where I pretty much know what my baby needs at all times and if i dont its bedtime. what techniques have you found that work for you? ------------- Mummy to 4 boys Samuel - 18.6.05 Rory - 15.7.06 Mason - 13.06.08 Emmett - 24.01.10 Baby #5 - cooking |
Replies:
Posted By: MrsEmma
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 2:41pm
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I've been watching this too (though I'm a bit behind so there's a few episodes waiting for me to watch). I find it really interesting with DD being a newborn and seeing what the different routines are and how well they work.
I am definitely more in the Dr Spock camp, it's the one I'm most comfortable with and the one I relate to most from what I've seen so far. I am definitely not keen on The Truby King method (from what I've seen so far). The poor Mum's and babies are only allowed 10 mins of cuddle time with their baby each day at 3pm which is strictly timed. They were also left to CIO (even when they were newborn). One poor Mum said she felt like she was being naughty when she was doing the 'allowed cuddle time' it made me cry  I totally understand different strokes for different folks but jeepers that method is pretty far from where I stand as a parent.
I must watch the rest this weekend if I can, I was interested to see which of the methods had baby STTN first just out of interest, I think it will be the Continuum concept which seems to have the most settled of the babies. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 2:47pm
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wtf only 10 minutes of cuddle time..and there is no way I would ever leave a new born to cry it out...babies should be cuddled at any time even at 3am.
just curious the Truby King method and breastfeeding or were the babies bottled fed cause I find it hard not to cuddle my son when he is having a breastfeed. |
Posted By: MrsEmma
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 2:51pm
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There are two couples doing each method and the Truby King ones are all bottle fed (unless it's EBM but I don't think it is) one of the ladies with twins was expressing and doing formula top ups but I think they went full time FF ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: pudgy
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:03pm
Oh we dont have sky i've seen this advertised before and the Truby King method is waaaay too harsh for newborns ( imo ) 
I wonder if you can get it anywhere else ? I d been keen to watch itn, im just reading the Continuum Concept now. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Puddleduck
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:25pm
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Man I wish we had sky
From your description I think I fall into the Dr Spock camp with a little Continuum concept thrown in. The Truby method sounds like madness! Poor cuddle starved babies  ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: Febgirl
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:34pm
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Everyone knows that Truby King was the founder of Plunket I assume?
If you're a child of the 70s and still have your Plunket book, have a read, some of the comments are priceless - DH's book had comments from the nurse that he should be left outside in the sun 2-3 hours a day for health benefits, and I started on rice milk at 8 weeks  ------------- Two little girls under 2! 
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:38pm
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I haven't seen it, but am not so keen on the Truby King one by the sounds!!! I'll cuddle my baby whenever he / I want it, thank you very much! Also, why not breast feed?!?!
Honestly, I don't think the Continuum approach (only from what's written here) would work for me at all either. For some reason I'm not sure of, I've always been keen to encourage Jacob to learn to play by himself and enjoy his own company. If he wants me, of course I'm there. But even as a teeny baby, I'd be keen for him to have some time on his mat by himself, and now he spends a lot of time playing while I work round him. He sleeps in his own cot, and I like that too (not that he would have had it any other way even if I didn't, he only falls asleep with me holding him or cuddling him when he's super-tired or sick. So I guess I either fall in the Spock camp or something else not followed on the programme. -------------   
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Posted By: Isabella
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:38pm
MrsEmma - I havent watched the program and I am not familiar with the different theories but in my coffee group of 13 mums - the two of us who will feed to sleep, and only let our bubbas SS if they are not crying - our babies are the ONLY ones in the group who SSTN and have done since they were about a month old  Small sample size I know but its good enough for me 
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:40pm
Bahah i can't take Dr Spock seriously because of his name. Wish we had sky, this sounds interesting. Will try find it online and will post links if i do for the rest of us poor tele watchers 
I'm about the same as you Rorylex, i feed on demand and babywear but DS sleeps by himself and has floor time independantly etc though i pick him up and cuddle him if he needs it of course. The strict routine thing is mental (IMO) though i can imagine some personality types (moms and babies) would thrive on it. |
Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:49pm
In our coffee group, the only babies who do are the ones who don't mind a bit of crying... I reckon it has a little to do with what you do, and a lot to do with the baby, TBH. That said, what you do is vitally important to how you feel you're doing as a mother, so big ups for doing it your way. -------------
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Isabella wrote:Posted By: Isabella
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 3:56pm
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Haha yep Hopes - its probably more luck of the draw - just look at how many different personalities in adults there are - babies are no different I think if you are happy in the way you are doing it - that happiness/calmness will transfer to the bubba and make them less anxious too...
I went through a stage of "i HAVE to get her to SS".. dont know why, just because I figured it was what I was supposed to be doing... she wasnt happy, I wasnt happy so I just thought - this is stupid, I will just go with it and stop stressing out = happy baby + happy mummy
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Posted By: MrsEmma
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 4:06pm
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Febgirl I had no idea he was the founder of Plunket! I had to lol at the 'being left out in the sun for 2-3 hours for health benefits' as one of the TK couples had to leave their twins out on the patio all rugged up in their pram to get fresh air for a few hours (and they weren't happy about it, the babies that is!) the poor Mum was in tears having to leave them out their on their own and they were crying
Isabella I am with you on your method, I was the same with DS and he slept through at 8 weeks. DD is not looking like a STTN candidate for some time but that's fine - I was fortunate first time round
I thought I'd catch up while it's just DD and I home and just watched an episode and it was actually the Dr Spock method that STTN first (11pm - 7am) ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MrsEmma
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 4:09pm
I wholeheartedly agree with this - I absolutely think baby's personality has everything to do with what they do, when they do it and for how long. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 4:18pm
| I watched that when I was pregnant. I'm guessing its just a repeat. I think all the methods suck by themselves. My parenting style has bits from everything |
Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 4:23pm
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In the search to watch online i found this blog article about how Claire Verity is/was potentially a fraud! http://socialbaby.blogspot.com/search/label/Claire%20Verity%20Exposed' - Linky
ETA: Highly biased blog i should add! |
Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 4:44pm
Ditto. And I think im a lot more relaxed with Amelia than I was with Caitlyn too,so my parenting methods have probably changed over time ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: rorylex
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 5:19pm
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I have only seen the one episode didnt know it was a series.
I found the cio meatod on a newborn far too harsh, from my experience (iv had 4 of them) they shouldnt cry that much if they are actually ready for sleep but then again that meathod is about making the baby work around you and not having to adjust your life BS. ------------- Mummy to 4 boys Samuel - 18.6.05 Rory - 15.7.06 Mason - 13.06.08 Emmett - 24.01.10 Baby #5 - cooking |
Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 5:22pm
Very true, my son self settled soooo well with not much effort from me(swaddle and pop in bed awake) but my daughter(whom I did the same thing for) wouldn't have a bar of it! Two veeerrryyy different babies!!! ------------- |
Posted By: Flossie
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 7:12pm
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Have to agree with those that are saying babies have their own personality and I am sure some are babies who just love to sleep! DD was NOT and we tried everything we possibly could (trust me!) She finally began sleeping through at 1 but still will wake now but we are soooo used to it, its not such a big deal! I think I may be a mixture of the three but mainly Dr Sprock as I tend to do what feels right/comfortable to me and DH. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Kalimirella
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 7:47pm
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I'm probably in the Dr Spock camp, I mostly know what my baby needs and when (must say was easier when she was Newborn as there was a limited number of things!)
And yeah, agree with the different personalities for babies thing! For sleep Kiara has always needed lots, she still often has 2x2hour naps at 14 mths. (She STTN from 3 1/2 mths) Whereas my nephew (her cousin) has never wanted much sleep and was wide awake during the day from a very young age. ------------- Kiara is 3 and Teagan is 2, now we're expecting our long awaited 3rd! http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 8:08pm
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I'd be too scared someone would steal DD if I left her outside by herself. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 4:00pm
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Sounds like an interesting show, shame we don't have sky! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: Two_Puddle_Ducks
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 4:06pm
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I have just watched the first two episodes and am so surprised at how strict the routine system is. Those poor mums just want to bond with their babies and they aren't allowed to.
I tend toward the Dr sprock though I do wear my babies most of the time. I just could not sleep with my son in our room so he was in his own room for sleeps from about 8weeks. I would co-sleep if I could sleep but it just doesn't work for me. looking forward to watching the last two episodes. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: myonlineself
Date Posted: 20 June 2011 at 10:09pm
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Wow, I guess these women agreed to be part of this show, but man, having women and their babies follow such a strict and outdated routine, that I would think has basically been 'debunked' in terms of being good for baby, raises a few ethical issues... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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