Describing Contractions...for men.
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Topic: Describing Contractions...for men.
Posted By: padthai
Subject: Describing Contractions...for men.
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 2:14pm
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Hi everyone
I teach some ante-natal classes and one of the Dads in the group asked me to describe to the class exactly what contractions feel like, so as the Dads to be are able to gain an understanding of it. This kinda had me stumped! I have had children but find the pain of a contraction really hard to put into words. Therefore I thought I would ask here! If you have a minute to spare, would you mind answering what that pain felt like for you? It would be great to be able to say "well, I asked the question and ten people said that it felt like ...". Many thanks in advance. PT |
Replies:
Posted By: Mucky_Tiger
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 2:32pm
my contractions i had follwing a D & C (so not quite chldbirth) felt like i had just eated a giant bowl of curry and had wicked cramping about 2seconds before the "indian poo's" arrived
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Posted By: Isabella
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 2:47pm
Yep I would say like waves of major lactic acid buildup in muscles after running like mad on a treadmill for half an hour! The pain of severe muscular fatigue (cos thats what it is!  ) which builds then descends like a growing tide... haha - very poetic way to describe pain! 
I was induced though and so the severity of contractions were major very fast, unlike natural labor where I have heard they build in severity from not too bad to pretty unbearable over quite a long time.. |
Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 3:10pm
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I find it hard to describe contractions to girls who haven't had babies let alone men who have no uterus and therefore will never feel them.
If it was me I would tell them that they will never know how it feels,unless they have also had a period and can compare those sorts of cramps and instead of asking they can just accept that its effing sore and they must do what they can to support their wife in labour. But since you clearly can't do that,I dunno,I usually tell people its like someone is standing inside you pulling you from the inside and you feel like you should be bent over double...but your not. And I also mention how you can't stop the contractions coming and that can be scary when you are so used to being in charge of your body,and thats also what helps make labour so painful...and eventually the contractions just come,and you lie there letting them consume you cos thats all you can do. Ha,im so glad I don't ever have to do this again And Isabella,not always,I wasn't induced with any of mine,and with my eldest child the contractions were unbearable right from the start,the very first one. ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 3:48pm
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To start with they were much like mild period cramps - which feel much like a gripey tummy.
BH - felt like someone was grabbing my belly like a ball and squeezing. Can't really remember what they felt like when they got going, too many other things were going on to concentrate on them. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: londonbaby
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 4:22pm
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Like someone squeezing you from the inside using all their strength...and you're thinking "oh this will surely end soon?" and it doesn't, its just gets stronger and you cannot believe what you are feeling....
and then eventually you succumbe to an epi and they feel fab
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Posted By: BriAndOlisMum
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 4:31pm
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how bout get them to start doing sit ups and hold each one for 10secs, when it starts to hurt that is like the first contractions, then make them keep going even when they think they can't move anymore. -------------  http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: M2K
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 4:36pm
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I told DH that the pains would feel for him, like being kicked in the nads every half hour, then they start getting closer til 2mins apart, his eyes were as wide as saucers haha. He had alot of sympathy while I was on my hands and knees groaning through mine. ------------- 
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Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 5:09pm
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One of the things i tell people who have never experienced it is that they are like a wave. they build in intensity and reach a peak, then quickly receed. And that when you aren't having one there is absolutely no pain.
As for the quality of the pain, i would describe the peak as a sharp, searing kind of pain. With a tightness, as if someone was tearing your deep abdominal muscles or bowel. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: TheBabe
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 5:28pm
Pure agony!! I wasn't induced but with both my kids I went straight into full-on, unbearably painful contractions from the start. I remember when I was having contractions about 3 secs apart but still barely dilated (and I knew I still had hours ahead of me) and I was frantic trying to remove myself from my belly before the pain hit. I didn't get waves it was like being stabbed - it burned and it was sharp and it was spread right across my tummy and I just couldn't escape it  holy crap I can't believe I did it TWICE let alone contemplating a third....
The situps is a really good idea!!! ETA correcting stuff lol ------------- Formerly 'Babe' Mama to my beautiful, busy boys Jake 01-07-2007 Tyler 20-02-2010 |
Posted By: Nothing
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 5:39pm
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There is a really good video on 60 minutes australia where a man gets put through labour. He wimps out half way through! ------------- 
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Posted By: Raspberryjam
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 7:25pm
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I described period pain as though you were about to fill your pants after bad seafood, and then times it by ten for contractions mixed with cramp ------------- http://lilypie.com] 
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Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 7:53pm
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The most pain Ive ever been through in my life! lol
I cant describe it...really cant! ------------- |
Posted By: Richie
Date Posted: 15 June 2011 at 8:09pm
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For me it was like someone had a really tight grib on my insides and was pulling it all out through my back and it was that intense from the get go. Didn't gradually get worse. It was straight into it, which gave me a bit of a fright at 2 in the morning! I was bolt up right in bed thinking OMG this baby is guna come out NOW! But she didn't.... not till 32hrs later........ try THAT boys! I've seen how they handle man flu. They could NEVER go through labour lol -------------  
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Posted By: AngieBabe
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 8:22am
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I really, really am trying to think of a way to describe my labour - firstly I thought about saying it would be like someone with a vise-like grip squeezing their nads... then I thought about that combined with the gripey deli-belly-ness where you think you're going to crap your pants only to find out you're really, really, really constipated so you despite everything you still find yourself pushing, to then feel like you're being torn up your middle.
I was induced and reacted really strongly to the syntocinon drip though, and did have 2nd degree tearing (in not such a lovely angle/place) - so that could possibly have clouded my perception! ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  
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Posted By: Chickoin
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 4:24pm
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I don't really remember what the contractions felt like, maybe something like the worse muscle cramps from the top of the bump to my knees, mixed with a sharp pain in the cervix.
I clearly remember the vjj pain when baby came out though! Get the men to stick a finger in each side of their mouth and pull as hard as they can. Then pull a bit harder. There may be some tearing, that's normal, keep pulling! PULL!!!!! Perhaps get the ladies to yell "PULL!!" at them, mwahaha I guess it would be hard to explain to the men so they have complete sympathy without scaring the mums to be  -------------   
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Posted By: padthai
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 5:32pm
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Thank you so much everyone! Some great material here. It is such a hard thing to accurately describe to someone else I think and like Chickoin says without scaring all the mums to be!
Awesome - I think they will love it! |
Posted By: julz85
Date Posted: 16 June 2011 at 9:08pm
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Haha wriggles i just googled that doco and i found it - http://womantowomancbe.wordpress.com/2009/10/14/man-experiencing-labor/ - http://womantowomancbe.wordpress.com/2009/10/14/man-experiencing-labor/ very funny!
------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: _Soda_
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 9:46am
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oh wow, so hard to explain!
I had a 100% natural birth with no drugs at all, and my friend who was due just after me asked what pushing the baby out felt like, and i told her it is the most out of control feeling you could possibly have. your body pushes involuntarily, like imagine one of those rubbish crushers that crush huge amounts of rubbish into tiny cubes, thats you! and every part of your belly clamps down with force you cant even imagine- the sheer power of the contraction took my breath away anyway! and as the baby is actually coming out, (TMI WARNING!!) but i told her it feels like your bum is turning inside out and your getting the worst chinese burn in your life down there and you are about to split in half! lol her eyes just about fell out of her head! i think she wished she didnt ask after i said that. well, she did want an honest answer! hehe  i did add at the end tho that once you are at that stage, you know you just have to deal with it,and remind yourself that once this bit is over, youll have your baby! and as much as people say it and you cant quite believe it until you have been there, but the second you are looking at your baby, you dont feel an ounce of pain! so amazing how something so intense can be blocked out in an instant. ------------- My little miracle 6/1/2011 My angel in Heaven 9/5/14 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: _Soda_
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 9:58am
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..actually maybe just show the men that video Julz posted- its awesome! ------------- My little miracle 6/1/2011 My angel in Heaven 9/5/14 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: Delli
Date Posted: 17 June 2011 at 12:09pm
That video gave me a good laugh. He didn't even get to the hardest contractions and only lasted just over 3 hours! And then he didn't have to push a baby out! Lol, imagine how they could simulate the pushing stage........ *evilly imagines the look on the guys face when they explain to him that after all those contractions he is now going to have to literally push a watermelon out of his bum.....* ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: _Soda_
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 2:24pm
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Muahahaha! (evil laugh) Delli, i LOVE how you think....oh, if only! ------------- My little miracle 6/1/2011 My angel in Heaven 9/5/14 http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 2:37pm
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I saw that on TV once, PMSL at it, he really didnt get very far at all!! I laboured for 48 hours lol! didnt get to push though, so I have no idea what that part feels like! I felt pressure in my butt and thats it, then it was off for the CS! ------------- |
Posted By: Salty39
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 6:59pm
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that video clip was brilliant!
For me the wave metaphor is the one. But the waves build in intensity and hurt! But you can feel it coming! If you have had a baby before as soon as you get one of the sore ones you think "oh that's right!! Now I remember, this HURTS!, and why the hell am I doing it AGAIN!!". So it's a wave of pain that has a definite peak and recedes and comes closer and closer. And sometimes you have to fight to let your body relax and not tense up when they start - cos that only makes it worse. And oh yeah, that burning splitting in two feeling is like nothing else. SORE! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: SammyA
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 7:15pm
LOVE the link!! posted it on facebook and showed it to my hubby too. Absolutely hilarious  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: julz85
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 11:14pm
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Its strange how different woman describe completly different things . I had a drug free labour and it only lasted about 5hrs of full labour (11 hrs from when my waters broke and first contraction), it was my first and only labour as i only have one child and for me the easiest part was the pushing part! to me the pushing part was a relief as i actually didnt find it painful , it just felt natural because my body was doing it and i wasnt in control, it felt very tight and alot of pressure , i pushed for a total of 5minutes! and in a first time mum it was the quickest pushing stage my midwife had ever seen so i was pretty lucky , also didnt have any tearing or anything , ouch i cant imagine that !!! funny how its so different for everyone and TBH iv forgotton what the pain of cotractions is like , i think my brain has blocked them out, i remember it BLOODY hurt but i wonder if i had a second baby if that memory of the pain would all come flooding back to me . ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 18 June 2011 at 11:27pm
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pushing C out...painful,pushing Ty out,not too bad...pushing Amelia out...oh my lord,I thought she was going to come out with a bumpy head it felt like it took forever to push her out.
I had 7 gaps between C and Ty,and as soon as the real contractions hit with him I was like "oh..yeah,thats right. Why the HELL am I doing this again?" With Mila though they never felt as sore.Good baby. Good girl. *pats baby on head* -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Daizy
Date Posted: 19 June 2011 at 9:45pm
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I really don't think I must have had it that bad.
Mine were definitely in waves but felt much like I had 'poo' cramps... (or number 3's) I spent most of my labours on the toilet, the first time I got angry at DH ringing the midwife (even though my cramping would come in 3 minute waves) because I just thought I had an upset stomach from eating a spicy curry the night before. Pushing them out.. well thats a whole other story, but then by that stage I am so exhausted it all happens so fast I barely remember. ------------- 
 
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Posted By: mrsm
Date Posted: 19 June 2011 at 10:26pm
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I'd say like a bad leg cramp that is squeezing your insides and you can't stretch it out.
It is funny how ladies differ in what they find the worst. For me the contractions were awful and pushing out wasn't too bad (and my bubba's were both 9 1/2lb). I like the sit-up idea too cause it would be funny for the mum's-to-be as well ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 20 June 2011 at 6:44am
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I thought the pushing was the worst part! It was SO nice to be able to push at first - it helped the pain a lot to be able to DO something... but then not only did the contractions start hurting just as bad, I has exausted, I remember thinking part-way through that there was no way I could ever get the energy to push anymore, I was going to be stuck with a baby up my fufu forever (in my not-so-rational labour thinking, that was a possibility, I kind of forgot that they'd manage to get it out one way or the other). -------------   
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