How did pregnancy affect family plans?
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Topic: How did pregnancy affect family plans?
Posted By: Keleho
Subject: How did pregnancy affect family plans?
Date Posted: 26 May 2011 at 9:02pm
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Something Ive been thinking about lately and wondering what others have done.
Im currently pregnant with #2. With DD, I was REALLY sick from about 5-6 weeks until 18, then again from 36 weeks until her birth. When I say really sick, I mean I threw up at least 10 times a day and would have happily spent all day in bed (shame I was working then  ).
So this time round Im almost 7 weeks in, only thrown up once but from 5 weeks have felt pretty rotton most days. No where near as bad (yet) but still pretty 
Anyway, what has got me thinking is that I have always wanted a large family (4+ kids) but im starting to wonder if I can put my body through this another 2 or more times, let alone my DH and the kids. I would love to have more but the way I feel means I can barely keep up with day to day things around the house and cooking is just horrid! DH has been making comments along the lines of 'if you get as sick as with DD, I think 2 might have to be it'. This coming from a guy who also wanted 4-5 kids. Did you find that the way your body coped with pregnancy or the way you felt while pregnant (physical or emotional) changed your preconceived notion of how many kids you would have/age gaps between kids/your partners thoughts on the whole thing? Or did you decide to go on with your original 'plan' regardless of how you were affected and just deal with it at the time? ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: Kalimirella
Date Posted: 26 May 2011 at 9:26pm
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Hmmm, well I'm the opposite, I orignally only thought about having 2 kids, but wiht how much I have loved having my beautiful little daughter and how easy my pregnancy was, and has been this time too, I've had a talk with DP and we might end up going for 4 O.o
The one thing I have to say is I get super tired, like 2 naps a day tired, while pregnant, for me I just push on and am grateful I have a super supportful partner. Also with age gaps, while I wanted a short age gap this time round, I will HAVE to have a longer gap between 2 and 3 because of my own health (I only have the 1 kidney and get borderline high blood pressure when pregnant)and my body needs time to recover. Do you still BF (sorry terrible memory!) its thought to reduce MS. Or is it possible to have someone come to help you on the days its all too much? Just thoughts for if you do go on to have more :D ------------- Kiara is 3 and Teagan is 2, now we're expecting our long awaited 3rd! http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: Mum_mum
Date Posted: 26 May 2011 at 9:28pm
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For us its not pregnancy that has changed how many children we wanted (we wanted 3-4) but its the first 6-12months. I really struggled with the sleep deprivation and in turn a bit of anxiety and DH found out he didn't have as much paitence for a screaming baby and a tearful wife than he thought He'd have.
So we think if this one is a boy then we will most likely have two. If its a girl then we'll have to have three. Having DD although wonderful now really changed our minds about having heaps. I'm a really maternal person too and always wanted to be a mum with a big family but the actual reality is it's damn hard work at times! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
 Angel baby - May 2008
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Posted By: Keleho
Date Posted: 27 May 2011 at 8:59am
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Kali - nah, Im not bfing anymore. Combination of Ks nursing strike (when I started expressing all her feeds), and then wisdom teeth removal followed by a horrid bout of food poisoning meant my supply turned into nothing (think I got 50mls total from 3-4 expresses a day, wasnt worth the hassle when I couldnt even express one full feed for her) ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 27 May 2011 at 9:15am
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Yeah it's crossed my mind the dread of ms & it putting me off, but it's for a very short space of time in the grand scheme of things. Also this time I was going to get drugs if it started affecting how I function during the day. ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 27 May 2011 at 9:42am
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Yes it could affect our family plans. We have always wanted 3 kids (both DH & I are from families of 3) but I have awful pregnancies- with #2 I had MS most of the pregnancy and could barely function for the first 4 months despite being on all sorts of meds. I found it really hard looking after Ella while being pregnant and feel like I missed out on 9 months of her life. During that pregnancy I swore I would never do it again despite really wanting 3 kids. Now, I still want 3 kids but still have the memory of how awful it was. I think we will have a 3rd but the age gap will be bigger than I would have liked because of how pregnancy affects me- there is nearly 3 years between Tom & Ella and realistically I think thats the minimum I could handle because it was a life saver that Ella could dress herself,feed herself, was TT etc. ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 27 May 2011 at 12:11pm
I was really sick for the first 26 weeks with DS1 (and he was born at 32 weeks lol) and for the first 24 weeks with DS2. During my second pregnancy it crossed my mind that I might not want to do it again but as soon as the sickness stopped I felt GREAT and I actually love being pregnant. Sucker for punishment? I've always wanted 4 kids but as one of the PPs said, it's the first 6 or so months that would change my mind about more. DH really only wants two as he hasn't coped well at all with the lack of sleep this time round. I'm hoping that after a slightly bigger gap he will realise we're not done yet The sh*t bits are really such a small amount of time in the scheme of things. I can't believe DS2 is over 7 months - I'm already clucky again  ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: 09_mrs
Date Posted: 27 May 2011 at 4:48pm
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My sister had really bad MS with her first two which were both girls but then with #3 (a boy) she really wasn't that sick at all and had way more energy etc. So I guess there is hope :) She originally wanted a large family (probably 4+ kids) but has decided now that three is enough (she is 34 now). My DH is keen for a large family too but I think 3 will be my limit as well. It's not the pregnancy that I'm worried about, more the sleep deprivation (argghhh). ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: TheBabe
Date Posted: 28 May 2011 at 1:07pm
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I was in and out of hospital with #1 due to severe hyperemesis gravidarum and had quite bad ms with #2 for the first trimester and last trimester and just bad ms for the second trimester lol we're TTC #3 soon.
The thing I'm worried about is labour coz they tend to be pretty hard for me. DH isn't keen on the ms part of things but we adore our kids and we've both agreed that its worth the blah to have another couple of poppets. I think if we have another rough labour we'll stop at 3 but I don't know. We're keen on having 4 so I think it's just a pregnancy by pregnancy decision for us. |