Terrible twos
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Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=39293
Printed Date: 24 August 2025 at 12:12pm
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Topic: Terrible twos
Posted By: KazS
Subject: Terrible twos
Date Posted: 23 May 2011 at 6:03pm
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If someone tells me they last until 3 i might go crazy.
Mother nature should make you go through having a 2 year old before you can conceive again 
Daughter is only 2 years and 2.5 weeks old and it was like a light switch - lovely then 
She had a big change shifting to the big kids daycare and a cold but honestly can anyone tell me how long this might last... (be nice i am fragile!!) |
Replies:
Posted By: freckle
Date Posted: 23 May 2011 at 6:15pm
oh no Kaz! what's she doing... mine were never difficult at two, it was 3 for DD2 and 13 for DD1... preschoolers have nothing on teenagers I tell ya 
Maybe it is just the changes going on though... kids can act out a fair bit with stuff like that... ------------- mum to 3 lovely girls :D |
Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 23 May 2011 at 6:27pm
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It really depends on the kid and how you manage the situation, but yes it is an essential developmental stage you need to survive.
I find that they tend to go through bad patches of what feels like endless tantrums, bad sharing and whining, hitting etc for a few weeks on end but then things smooth out for a bit. But i also think personality and how you manage it makes a huge difference. This is the time when you are really trying to create a human being we would all like to share the planet with. They are going to push all the social boundaries to find out where those boundaries are. And then they are going to push and push and push just to check that the response is the same each time. We recently did a "your child personality" course at The Parenting Place and that has made a huge difference to my understanding of where my boy is coming from and what his frustrations/anxieties are. It also covers your personality and dymanics, and discipline techniques for different personalities. I went with a friend whose previously delightful 2yo had been driving her nuts and she says it is much better now. Advice: One of the best things i think is to try (hard tho) to keep calm when managing the behaviour. Losing your temper just aggravates it. Pick your battles but be super consistent with what you choose to focus on. Give lots of positive attention and make sure physical/social needs are met. Hunger/thirst/tiredness/boredom will all make behaviour worse, so try not to let these be an issue. Treat them with respect - calmly explain why the behaviour is not ok, always give them the chance to make the right choice. If you back a toddler into a corner they will just lose it. If all else fails Valium was called mothers little helper for a reason. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 23 May 2011 at 7:34pm
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My mum has been joking with my DD 'I thought the terrible twos didn't start until they were 2' *gulp* ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Paulsmum
Date Posted: 23 May 2011 at 10:23pm
i work in childcare and have always worked with 2-3's and im sorry to say but i believe its terrible 3's not 2's!!! stand your ground, remeber you are the parent so are in charge, if they are having a tantrum walk away, if they dont have any attention they are going to get over it really quickly! just make sure they are in a safe place  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: KazS
Date Posted: 24 May 2011 at 7:59am
Thanks - i think i am managing all of this - maybe i am just going crazy on the inside....
I have done alot of counting to ten (for myself) and breathing calmly recently!! i will get through this! |
crafty1 wrote:Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 24 May 2011 at 12:50pm
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They do drive you round the bend a bit, but it definitely goes past 3 too sorry to say. But by then they are also becoming super caring and sweet too, so it all evens out. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: KazS
Date Posted: 24 May 2011 at 4:39pm
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Just taken her to the docs - ear infection!
So i very wrongly attributed her sour mood to just being 2 Gosh do i feel bad now! |
Posted By: Shelt
Date Posted: 24 May 2011 at 8:47pm
For me the terrible 2's started at 15 months and have been going on ever since. I do agree though with who ever said it tends to be several weeks of particularly bad behaviour and then settles down for a bit till the next cycle starts. I also tried to work out what it is that DD does that completely winds me up and tried to think sensibly about whether it really matters or not. I try really hard to not "sweat the small stuff" and think outside the square a bit when it comes to dealing with some of the behaviour - distraction works really well with some things but not with others, sometimes just singing a song lightens the mood a bit and sometimes I have to put us both in time out so we can calm down  Some days and weeks are definitely worse than others and sometimes I just have to remind myself that "this too shall pass".------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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