I just cant believe this!!!
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Topic: I just cant believe this!!!
Posted By: LouD
Subject: I just cant believe this!!!
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 6:27pm
http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=10720331 - Article: Not all Families are equal
I will just leave it at ......WOW!!!
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Replies:
Posted By: JadeC
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 6:50pm
Wow. What a bunch of entitiled, self-important, superficial crap.
------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: Nothing
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 6:58pm
UGH
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 7:05pm
"Due to a number of inappropriate posts, the comment feature has been turned off this blog."
Really now? Who'd have guessed?
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Posted By: EmDee
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 7:30pm
*Speechless*
------------- DS 8 DD 6 DS 4 DD 2
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 7:33pm
There was one comment that rang a bell with me - "This column illustrates in its own small way everything that is wrong with the world"
Of course, they published this because they knew it would evoke this kind of reaction. Still, I can't help being gobsmacked...
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Posted By: julz85
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 8:22pm
i also am quite gob smacked by this artcle altho im guessing thats the reaction they were going for , Anyone who writes like this is simply looking for controversy
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Posted By: MrsEmma
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 8:28pm
Wow!!
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: JoJames
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 8:49pm
I just can't believe that she is accusing everyone else of being ignorant, when she is the most ignorant person out. Wowser!
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Posted By: ItchyFeet
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 8:57pm
When she believes that BFing so obviously ruins the breasts, I couldn't believe she'd actually physically had her own child. Imagine the risks she took with ruining her entire body by doing so.
Doesn't she know that men (and snobbish women) should get over it - breasts are for babies and not for snaring husbands?
I actually felt really sorry for her, she'll never know what she missed out on, despite her glorified view of the world.
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Posted By: GuestGuest
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 9:21pm
I don't understand what the big deal is. Everyone has a different style of parenting and have different beliefs and values, I don't see why she should be shot down for hers.
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Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 9:28pm
I just feel sorry for her she obviously lives in an extremely warped and shallow world and I feel sorry for the child she is undoubtedly raising to have the same warped view.
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Posted By: mothermercury
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 9:28pm
It's because of her incredibly condescending view of the "plebes", if you will.
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Posted By: LouD
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 9:36pm
LuckyRed wrote:
I don't understand what the big deal is. Everyone has a different style of parenting and have different beliefs and values, I don't see why she should be shot down for hers. |
hmmmm really?? did u read the whole article?
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Posted By: AbzandH
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 10:12pm
If this is actually the views of this woman, she is nothing short of a narrow-minded idiot. Everyone definitely has a different parenting style but we all put our kids first, hopefully her karatane nurse puts her kid first cuz she doesn't seem to.
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Posted By: julz85
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 10:17pm
i dont really understand why the article was even published , It doesnt really make any sense . I understand that breastfeeding is best for baby but not all people can breastfeed but i personally dont understand why someone would choose not to breastfeed simply because they did not want a boob job and why they would write this down in the herald newspaper for all to see, to me it makes her look self absorbed and small minded not educated like she likes to think she is , she obviously isnt eduacted enough to realise that most sagging is caused by not wearing a supportave bra during pregnancy not the actual breastfeeding . everyone is entitled to their own opinion but i just think the whole article is rubbish and self endulgent.
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Posted By: Troods
Date Posted: 03 May 2011 at 11:03pm
I agree, not all families are equal. And how neat for her that her family included an in-house Karitane nurse to do most of the job for her. She had the freedom to things like lunch with her friends everyday, keep looking good for her husband, and best of all she chose not to have to put up with the inconvenience and debilitating effects of breastfeeding. Why wouldn't a quality media outlet like The Herald not publish the article. She is clearly better than us average/lower socioeconomic folk and of course she is entitled to her opinion - which is that of a rich snob with perky breasts living in her perfect little bubble of a world that included a household that was "calm and orderly with no less than three intelligent, doting adults in the house to look after one small baby". Clearly an inspiration to us all
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Missed MC July 2011
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 7:52am
I don’t particularly have any issue with her making her own choices, LR. I mean, I bet lots of us side-slept their babies (I didn’t, but I know lots of people do). And while I think it’s rather pathetic to choose not to breastfeed because you’re worried about the cosmetic affect on your boobies, as a mature adult I’d do my best not to judge someone who made that choice. They’ve obviously got a whole world of insecurities going on that I don’t have a clue about (!), so they’re more to be pitied than mocked.
It’s not her decisions as such, rather the tone of the article that does me in. I’d totally understand the argument “The WHO recommends this. However, that’s blanket advice and for reasons a, b, c & d, it was healthier for me and my baby to bottle-feed / side sleep / whatever.” But she’s coming from the point of view that “The WHO recommends this. However, because their advice is aimed at dumb people, and I’m super-brainy, I’m above all of that guff and however I choose to do it is right.”
I’m also very unimpressed by the general feel in the article that money = intelligence. In other words, if you’re rich, it’s because you’re smart. You’re then able to disregard any advice because, after all, it’s meant for dumb poor people. If you’ve got less money, it’s because you’ve also got less brains. Obviously this is true to some degree (I’m betting your average meth addict doesn’t have many brain cells to rub together), but ridiculous really. We’re not rich, but I’m happy to bet my DH is waaaay more intelligent that someone who can write guff like that 
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Posted By: CrazyCass
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 9:38am
Wow! what can you say to that - she obviously has a REALLY high opinion of herself!
Ugh thank goodness most people are down to earth enough to understand everyone has different opinions, and we dont stand on our high horses to preach to the world while looking down our noses at them!
grrrrr
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: ereynolds
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 10:33am
I whole-heartedly agree with you Hopes! I couldn't have said it better myself!
Edited to add: I just read this rebuttal on stuff.co.nz and thought you guys might want to have a read: http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/blogs/pg-parental-guidance-advised/4957999/Not-all-rich-families-are-equal - Stuff blog
------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">
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Posted By: myonlineself
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 12:56pm
Thanks for posting that rebuttal.
I think the original article in the herald was meant to be tongue in cheek... it just wasn't actually that funny.... At least I assume it was meant to be a piss take... but yeah, its hard to be sure...
------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 1:13pm
I wondered that. But then I thought it was such a poor attempt it would never have got published... so I kind of figure it wasn't intended as satire. But it would be a relief if it was!
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Posted By: Babykatnz
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 2:05pm
i love the rebuttal!!
------------- Brandon - 05/12/2003

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Posted By: mothermercury
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 2:05pm
Either way, she's a terrible writer! If it's serious then she's alienated just about the entire population. If it's satire, and we can't tell (I like to think I'm reasonably intelligent and can figure these things out), she hasn't done it right.
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Posted By: MamaT
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 2:33pm
Well put Hopes, your post on the previous page, mimics exactly how I feel.
And thanks to the person who posted the rebuttal, very well written.
I just don't get why the newspaper would publish such ignorant trash.
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Posted By: Panda289
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 2:34pm
Man that article was so bad (satire or not) it even has my baby rolling and kicking around a whole heap inside me today!
Plus my boobs are already sagging a little just from pregnancy so I am not sure breastfeeding is entirely at fault..
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Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 2:55pm
It's got to be some sort of troll for sure. It seems unbelievable that someone would be that ignorant. Although i read some of her other articles and yes she probably does believe those things. Probably doesn't run into the poor at her daughter's equestrian events and while holidaying in the Coromandel.
It's not the whole bf and side sleeping thing that upset me, each to their own and i agree that people should do their own research and make a decision for their family's best interests.
It was the whole 'poor people are stupid and meth addicts' theme that i found outrageous.
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Posted By: rorylex
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 7:07pm
lol I'v had 4 babies and have bfed them all 3-16mths each and mine certainly dont sag and i dont at all feel the need for a lift.
------------- Mummy to 4 boys
Samuel - 18.6.05
Rory - 15.7.06
Mason - 13.06.08
Emmett - 24.01.10
Baby #5 - cooking
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Posted By: pikelets
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 8:26pm
I thought she was taking the p*ss at first
Also agree with Hopes!
Seems snobby and ignorant to me. In fact, don't think it would be someone I would be friends with at coffee group as she knows it all!!
edited to add: Love what someone said in the comments online...."Dare I ask where you sit on the to vacinate or not spectrum?"
------------- http://lilypie.com">
3 Angels - Dec10 / Mar11 / Dec11
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Posted By: LouD
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 9:55pm
Dr OZ said that its not Breastfeeding that makes boobies sag......its smoking....!!
And Ive also heard that breastfeeding or not, you still get saggy boobs......its called gravity and we ALL get graced with that whether we like it or not.....
ETA: Doh thats pretty much what I just read in the rebuttal.....I promise I wrote the above before i read it.....glad my sources were correct
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Posted By: nathansmummy
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 10:32pm
Hopes wrote:
I don’t particularly have any issue with her making her own choices, LR. I mean, I bet lots of us side-slept their babies (I didn’t, but I know lots of people do). And while I think it’s rather pathetic to choose not to breastfeed because you’re worried about the cosmetic affect on your boobies, as a mature adult I’d do my best not to judge someone who made that choice. They’ve obviously got a whole world of insecurities going on that I don’t have a clue about (!), so they’re more to be pitied than mocked.
It’s not her decisions as such, rather the tone of the article that does me in. I’d totally understand the argument “The WHO recommends this. However, that’s blanket advice and for reasons a, b, c & d, it was healthier for me and my baby to bottle-feed / side sleep / whatever.” But she’s coming from the point of view that “The WHO recommends this. However, because their advice is aimed at dumb people, and I’m super-brainy, I’m above all of that guff and however I choose to do it is right.”
I’m also very unimpressed by the general feel in the article that money = intelligence. In other words, if you’re rich, it’s because you’re smart. You’re then able to disregard any advice because, after all, it’s meant for dumb poor people. If you’ve got less money, it’s because you’ve also got less brains. Obviously this is true to some degree (I’m betting your average meth addict doesn’t have many brain cells to rub together), but ridiculous really. We’re not rich, but I’m happy to bet my DH is waaaay more intelligent that someone who can write guff like that  |
Hope, I have to disagree with you. For one thing, it seemed to me that she chose to side sleep her child so that he didn't get a flat head (clearly as worried about her child's appearance as she was about her boobs). It seemed to me (did I get the wrong impression) that her reasons for choosing to go against advice on how to position her baby to sleep and whether or not to breastfeed were entirely to do with her prioritizing both her own and her baby's appearance. She seemed to have the opinion that breastfeeding was for "poor, developing nations" and that the WHO guidelines did not apply to her because she could afford a Karitane Nurse to watch her baby around the clock to make sure he didn't suffer SIDS so that he could keep his perfectly shaped head and she could keep her perfectly shaped boobs. What's terrible about this article, though, is that she shared her opinion so publically in the nations newspaper. With all the efforts NZ has made to prevent SIDS and promote breastfeeding for the health and wellbeing of babies - this stupid woman comes along and publically turns her nose up at it. It's totally irresponsible to publish such an article and while she makes me very angry with her snobbery and her misguided superiority - I am equally annoyed with the Editor of the paper who should not have published this article. What's worse is that they have closed off our ability to comment on the article. Instead of deleting clearly abusive comments we can't even dispute it. I for one will be making a complaint to the NZ Herald not only for the publishing of the article but also for the public being unable to comment on it.
Just to add - I think it's a bit of a judgment to say that people are poor because they are stupid. While education has its part to play that kind of leap is nothing short of ignorant.
Obviously we agree on her superior attitude. It is SO distasteful.
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Posted By: nathansmummy
Date Posted: 04 May 2011 at 10:53pm
Oh re: the Royal Wedding she says:
"I'm independent, opinionated and a staunch feminist. But a lover of royal weddings as well? Even I could see the dissonance there."
In other words "the Royal Wedding is far beneath me so I could see why my husband would be surprised that I might be interested" Between her "holidaying" in Coromandel and "holidaying" in Boston - the article is actually really badly written.
In another article she writes: "For possibly the first time in my life I'm going through a stage where I'm one of these very busy people. I have so many projects on the go that I wrote a list to help me prioritise daily competing demands.
It listed, in order: healthy eating, my daughter's equestrian endeavours, renovating a Hawkes Bay cottage, my journalism career, hosting functions as a corporate wife - and playing interclub tennis."
It's clear that she is a "kept woman" as a "corporate's wife" (ugh!) I guess what I can't stand about this woman is her values - it is very clear that money and prestige and appearing superior is what is most important to this woman.
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 05 May 2011 at 7:09am
pikelets wrote:
I thought she was taking the p*ss at first  |
that's what I think....I never read any of her articles or heard of her till now... so she has done what she set out to do...get readers & people talking about her.
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 05 May 2011 at 8:38am
nathansmummy wrote:
Hopes wrote:
I don’t particularly have any issue with her making her own choices, LR. I mean, I bet lots of us side-slept their babies (I didn’t, but I know lots of people do). And while I think it’s rather pathetic to choose not to breastfeed because you’re worried about the cosmetic affect on your boobies, as a mature adult I’d do my best not to judge someone who made that choice. They’ve obviously got a whole world of insecurities going on that I don’t have a clue about (!), so they’re more to be pitied than mocked.
It’s not her decisions as such, rather the tone of the article that does me in. I’d totally understand the argument “The WHO recommends this. However, that’s blanket advice and for reasons a, b, c & d, it was healthier for me and my baby to bottle-feed / side sleep / whatever.” But she’s coming from the point of view that “The WHO recommends this. However, because their advice is aimed at dumb people, and I’m super-brainy, I’m above all of that guff and however I choose to do it is right.”
I’m also very unimpressed by the general feel in the article that money = intelligence. In other words, if you’re rich, it’s because you’re smart. You’re then able to disregard any advice because, after all, it’s meant for dumb poor people. If you’ve got less money, it’s because you’ve also got less brains. Obviously this is true to some degree (I’m betting your average meth addict doesn’t have many brain cells to rub together), but ridiculous really. We’re not rich, but I’m happy to bet my DH is waaaay more intelligent that someone who can write guff like that  |
Hope, I have to disagree with you. For one thing, it seemed to me that she chose to side sleep her child so that he didn't get a flat head (clearly as worried about her child's appearance as she was about her boobs). It seemed to me (did I get the wrong impression) that her reasons for choosing to go against advice on how to position her baby to sleep and whether or not to breastfeed were entirely to do with her prioritizing both her own and her baby's appearance. She seemed to have the opinion that breastfeeding was for "poor, developing nations" and that the WHO guidelines did not apply to her because she could afford a Karitane Nurse to watch her baby around the clock to make sure he didn't suffer SIDS so that he could keep his perfectly shaped head and she could keep her perfectly shaped boobs. What's terrible about this article, though, is that she shared her opinion so publically in the nations newspaper. With all the efforts NZ has made to prevent SIDS and promote breastfeeding for the health and wellbeing of babies - this stupid woman comes along and publically turns her nose up at it. It's totally irresponsible to publish such an article and while she makes me very angry with her snobbery and her misguided superiority - I am equally annoyed with the Editor of the paper who should not have published this article. What's worse is that they have closed off our ability to comment on the article. Instead of deleting clearly abusive comments we can't even dispute it. I for one will be making a complaint to the NZ Herald not only for the publishing of the article but also for the public being unable to comment on it.
Just to add - I think it's a bit of a judgment to say that people are poor because they are stupid. While education has its part to play that kind of leap is nothing short of ignorant.
Obviously we agree on her superior attitude. It is SO distasteful. |
Umm... did you actually disagree with me? I missed the bit where you did 
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Posted By: nathansmummy
Date Posted: 05 May 2011 at 8:40am
Conclusion: she's either a troll who doesn't write well or incredibly ignorant and as someone else said has alienated herself. (Probably best for her to hang out in Remuera or change her name when she's in mummy circles). Problem being that most "trolls" are anonymous... wonder what her future articles will be if the Herald Editor is stupid enough to publish them?
Hope - maybe I didn't disagree with you I don't know was up late
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Posted By: Zen_Jenn
Date Posted: 05 May 2011 at 9:51am
I agree with most of you :) . I was really annoyed that the NZHerald saw this fit to publish, I think it was irresponsible.
To give them the benefit of the doubt, maybe they published it to get us (and the blogosphere) talking, which worked. If so, at the very least they should have left the comments section running, in order to allow debate and retorts. I am going to write a short letter to the editor, decrying their choice to shut down any chance of a meaningful debate of that horrible article.
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Posted By: astral_monkey
Date Posted: 05 May 2011 at 12:24pm
I thought it must be some kind of joke when I started reading it, but then realised there was no punch line!
To be honest, she's entirely correct in that there is a subset of our society that has the means and vanity to take boob jobs and flat heads into consideration. I guess the question would be, at what point does the advise in this article go from being solidarity amongst like-minded people, to harmful and dangerous?
I am all for bottle over breast, if that is what is best for your family, and I don't know the risks of side sleeping over back, but recognise a families right to chose.
Personally, I think these woman are trying to have their cake and eat it too, which seems like a heck of a gamble when your child's health and well-being are at stake. (It also leads to other issues down the track, like giving your 8 year old botox!) At what point does it become neglect, or child endangerment?
I don't agree with following all the advice of the government, WHO, plunket, etc. Every family is different, every child is different. But I most certainly don't agree with the articles attitude of beauty over safety and if you're rich, the rules don't apply.
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Posted By: escadachic
Date Posted: 05 May 2011 at 8:10pm
Oh, I was nosey and googled her name. She has a very fancy house. Looks like, by the state of it, she's very uptight. Poor daughter!
And yeah, that article totally rubs me up the wrong way! Won't even say what I really think of her.
...well...maybe...but warning, it's nasty...
I think what she does need is some plastic surgery on her face, she's not attractive by my standards.
I know, that's a nasty thing to say, but if she wasn't so closed minded and opinionated and idiotic, I wouldn't have cared and felt the need to lash out like that.
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Posted By: LouD
Date Posted: 05 May 2011 at 9:09pm
jazzy wrote:
pikelets wrote:
I thought she was taking the p*ss at first  |
that's what I think....I never read any of her articles or heard of her till now... so she has done what she set out to do...get readers & people talking about her.
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Serious big noting attention seeker
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Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 09 May 2011 at 1:59pm
I saw http://www.nzherald.co.nz/lifestyle/news/article.cfm?c_id=6&objectid=10724392 - this article in the Herald today on the subject...
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Posted By: CrazyCass
Date Posted: 09 May 2011 at 2:19pm
Ha Snap Hopes! I was just coming on here to post that link!
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Posted By: ooEvaoo
Date Posted: 09 May 2011 at 2:22pm
Shelley Bridgeman definitely gives the Herald a bad name...glad I don't subscribe to it anymore. Cudos for Viv Gurrey's article. Like everyone else...gobsmacked.
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Posted By: MamaT
Date Posted: 09 May 2011 at 3:57pm
Another well written rebuttal. Once again though, the comment section has been closed off
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