Newly hysterical at bedtime
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Topic: Newly hysterical at bedtime
Posted By: luvmylittlies
Subject: Newly hysterical at bedtime
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 8:01pm
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My DD has been a perfect sleeper since 8-12 weeks. Normally she is perfectly happy to go into her cot and sleep both during the day and at night.
BUT since yesterday she has suddenly got hysterical when going into the cot. Not whingy or even upset that builds up to hysterical - she goes straight from being happy to the full on screaming like someone has stabbed her. She was fine yesterday for her day sleeps then started this last night but it has carried over to both her sleeps today and now tonight. It seems like severe separation anxiety as she clutches at me (or her dad) and I can settle her if I'm half in the cot with her. I managed to get her to have an afternoon nap only by letting her sleep on me today. I have never had to do this before. She's completely normal apart from this. No problems if we walk out of the room when she's playing and she's perfectly happy to crawl off out of the room on her own to explore the house. She probably is teething but has never been like this with the others (just a little whingy). There's no signs of earache and she can lie flat if I lie down next to her. Any suggestions as to how to manage it? The odd occasion that she whinges in bed we tend to let her go for a few minutes but normally she settles herself in under 5 mins. If she goes longer it's because there's a problem (lost her pig, teething, leg out the cot etc). But this is something completely different and I am not happy leaving her to scream like this. I can't actually remember her ever crying like this before. Do you think it'll pass - should I just sleep with her for a few nights? I'm just worried that that will make the separation anxiety worse. ------------- Adoring Mum to Talisin 8/9/11 and Kiara 18/01/10 |
Replies:
Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 8:13pm
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My kids are $hit sleepers so I have no advice sorry, just didn't want to read and run.
Hope you work out a solution  ------------- Lindsey 
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Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 8:25pm
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Oh no poor you and K It does sound like it could be separation anxiety. If it were me, I would try sitting on the floor beside her cot with my hands on her chest while she falls asleep. If that does work then you could slowly work on reducing the amount of the time you have to be in the room. GL ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Posted By: luvmylittlies
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 8:52pm
Thanks M2ET. She needs to be cuddled though in order to settle down. Just patting or rubbing or letting her hold my arm wasn't enough. She's asleep now. We let her scream for 5 (horrible) then went in picked her up, settled her right down, popped her back...scream for 5 then picked her up, rocked her to sleep and this time she stayed asleep. But I don't like a) leaving her to scream at all at that intensity and b)sneaking out when she's asleep. We'll see what happens tomorrow I guess. It's just come on so suddenly with no warning signs. Sigh, not what I need with MS setting in nicely  . ------------- Adoring Mum to Talisin 8/9/11 and Kiara 18/01/10 |
Posted By: yermasyada
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 8:54pm
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Ohhh huge hugs hun
Gosh, I don't know what to suggest Could it be worth trying something new, like a musical mobile, to act as a distraction when she goes into cot. Maybe if you started it going a few minutes before, and then when she goes in, she has something soothing to focus on?
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Posted By: luvmylittlies
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 9:04pm
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Good thought M'moo. Definitely worth a try. ------------- Adoring Mum to Talisin 8/9/11 and Kiara 18/01/10 |
Posted By: yermasyada
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 9:09pm
Oh, forgot to say... I totally think you're doing the right thing at the moment though. It's so unusual for her to be like this, she obviously needs the comfort and extra huggles 
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Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 9:13pm
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I agree- I would keep on doing what you are doing for the moment and see how it goes ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Milliemoo wrote:Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 27 February 2011 at 9:45pm
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Agree with whats been said, I guess the other thing is do you mind developing a habit like rocking to sleep etc?
Could you perhaps try some cuddles and stories before going into the cot? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: jano1
Date Posted: 28 February 2011 at 8:19am
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We had the exact same thing happen when my DD was 13 months- it was out of the blue and it actually seems more common that you think. It must be an age thing.
Gradual withdrawl worked for us, but it took a week or so for her to stop screaming when we out her in her cot. Gook luck. |
Posted By: luvmylittlies
Date Posted: 28 February 2011 at 9:02am
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LilNic - her evening routine is bath, stories in her room then breastfeed and cuddles then into the cot. She's happy in the cot provided you don't leave her (eg if you read to her in the cot there is no problem). I definitely don't want to create the habit of rocking to sleep but I'm hoping the "look we come back after 5 mins" thing will eventually reassure her and she'll stop getting so upset.
Thanks Jano. I'd heard about this happening around 9 months but wasn't aware of it being common at this age. I'm sure we can all survive a week or so. ------------- Adoring Mum to Talisin 8/9/11 and Kiara 18/01/10 |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 28 February 2011 at 9:45am
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It does sound like separation anxiety, I can't really remember what we did when we went through it though other than a lot of reassurance! I hope someone else has some better advice! I do know that spending about 15 mins with her in her room before bed did seem to 'calm' her. So we just read books and have 2 bed time books that we always read before bed time. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: FionaO
Date Posted: 01 March 2011 at 8:43am
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Could be worth checking ears - even if she seems ok, sometimes things are worse at night. Other than that, take comfort in the fact this started really quickly, it will be a phase. Give her some extra cuddles and wean off slowly. ------------- 
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Posted By: sarahsarah
Date Posted: 19 May 2011 at 8:34am
| I could have written your exact post thesaff! My 15mth is doing the same thing. We are at 2weeks now and no improvement. How are you going? Has this "phase" stopped for you yet? We are so desperate and sooooo sleep deprived. HELP! |
Posted By: luvmylittlies
Date Posted: 19 May 2011 at 12:31pm
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Yep it settled for us after about a week if I remember right. But it was bloody awful in the meantime and so unlike her. We persisted with what I outlined above (5 minute cry, cuddle until settled, 5 minute cry etc) even although sometimes it sometimes took 3 or 4 goes to get her settled. I also started putting music on again (which I hadn't done for AGES) and I think that she got a little distracted from that as well.
I agree with someone elses post too to get their ears checked. Apparently they can seem fine upright but when they lie down it hurts them. Hope things get better for you. It seemed like such a backward step for us until we got on top of it again. ------------- Adoring Mum to Talisin 8/9/11 and Kiara 18/01/10 |
Posted By: AandCsmum
Date Posted: 19 May 2011 at 1:08pm
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Just saw this, I was going to say that they are old enough to understand the words bedtime, so maybe starting talking about going to bed & the steps that you are going to do on the lead up to bed so they're prepared for it?? ------------- Kel http://lilypie.com"> 
A = 01.02.04 & C = 16.01.09 & G = 30.03.12 |
Posted By: sarahsarah
Date Posted: 19 May 2011 at 1:59pm
| Thanks! will keep up with our resettling and hope it ends soon! ARGHHH If it continues another week Ill be back to the doctor. Thanks again |