Wills
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=38070
Printed Date: 28 August 2025 at 3:37am
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Topic: Wills
Posted By: kiwisj
Subject: Wills
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 1:40pm
I am ashamed to say dh and I don't have wills  but it's on our list of things to sort out when we come home next month.
Can anyone recommend a lawyer in Wellington that can do this for us? I suspect we're a pretty straightforward case although we are about to purchase property here in Singapore, I have no idea whether that complicates anything? What about the fact we live overseas at the mo? Basically I'm competely naive about all this stuff and woud appreciate any pointers in the right direction! Ps please tell me we're not the only ones without wills. I feel like I suddenly became a grown up without realizing it and have to sort all this stuff out! ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Replies:
Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 1:43pm
eek you have just reminded me to get our updated. We used the public trust last time. I want someone not included in DH's will hate talking to him about it as he thinks leaving that person out will be enough & I am not sure....better add it to the to-do list
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Posted By: kiwikt
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 1:53pm
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That reminds me! We need to get our wills done.
Also need to meet the superannuation broker and get DH back on super after we had to pull out of his last scheme. ------------- Due 14/10/11 http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 2:25pm
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we dont have wills. Its one of those things i keep thinking about and never getting done. one of the biggest problems i have is that i dont know who to have as guardians of our children if something happened to both of us... ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: LG
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 2:57pm
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We've put off getting wills for the same reason as Bizzy - no one will look after our kids as good as we will (haha!). Must get on to it though - sorry thats no help to any of your questions though -------------  Angel Baby Aug '12, Feb '13 |
Posted By: amme_eilyk
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:02pm
| we got ours done through public trust as you can get it all done in one go and its free. |
Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:05pm
Er well, it's free to make it, but they make all their $$$$ when you die. It's cheaper all up to go to a solicitor and make it with them - it's usually a one off fee - they don't charge against your estate or anything. ------------- Mum to two wee boys |
amme_eilyk wrote:Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:12pm
they don't charge too much & you can change it as many times as you want & don't have to pay like you do a lawyer for every visit or call. |
Posted By: ChrisW
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:27pm
As a lawyer... if someone has made a Will with us and then wishes to update it, we do not charge for updating the Will. Of course every law firm is different. Public Trust do charge for Wills if you do not use them as an executor. If you do use them as an executor it means they get to administrate your estate. The fees they charge for administration are definately more than ours! ------------- http://pregnancy.baby-gaga.com/">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Plushie
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:41pm
| Can i not just write on a piece of paper that my brother gets my cd collection? Is it not legal if you write it up yourself? (Not that i have a self-written will somewhere i just have no serious assests like a house or a trust fund, i only have things and after i die i don't care where they go.) |
Posted By: mothermercury
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:46pm
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Bowie, now that you have a child, it is important because you need to decide what happens to him should anything happen to you. I don't have a will either but need to get onto this. I have no possessions I care about, all I care about is my girl.
I don't think it "counts" if you have your own thing on a bit of paper. Not legal enough. 
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Posted By: kiwisj
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:50pm
Yup this is one of the reasons we haven't done anything before now too! I did think about using public trust but I think we should probably get some advice re the fact that we live o/s but have assets in nz (and the kids' guardians are likely to be in nz or oz) ------------- SJ Callum - Dec 2008 Daniel - Oct 2010 |
Posted By: MamaT
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 3:53pm
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We don't have a will either, like Bizzy, we really don't have any ideas as to who to leave DS with if something were to happen to the both of us.
Although, it really is something we should get onto. -------------  
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Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 4:05pm
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You can get DIY will kits.
When DH was drafting ours (he's a lawyer) he said they're actually one of the most precise legal documents that are drawn up, and you do need to have the i's dotted and t's crossed. If you're not sure about guardianship, I'd still recommend doing a will. Like Chris said, you can add on, but you're best to start somewhere. It can be a nightmare if your partner dies and you have no will - you don't automatically get all the assets or the insurances, and it can take a long time to get that stuff sorted out. It's not a stress that you need. That said, pot kettle black. We didn't do ours till I was 36 weeks PG with #2! ------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: T_Rex
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 4:08pm
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We made ours at the same time as we bought this property so we lumped all the legal fees into one. We've since updated it to include a guardian for DD and all subsequent children. It was fairly simple to do - just a quick chat with the solicitor who knew all the ins and outs. Can't help with a wellington recommendation though, sorry. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 4:39pm
did not know that so will ask when we update, has been a few yrs & kids 
I am the same have not done it as don't want to leave the kids with anyone. |
Posted By: Hopes
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 4:55pm
Random, we just went to the lawyer to get ours done today  . How's that for topical.
It 'counts', as long as you get a couple of non-related, non-inheriting people to witness it. And, of course, that people know it exists and where it is when you die. However, they recommend that you get a lawyer to do it, because if you make a stuff-up and make something not clear enough, it can get really messy. Also, lawyers know stuff that we don't think of. Like the fact that they executors of your estate shouldn't be the same people as you give custody of your kids to, or they could be in a position to fleece the kids inheritance (or, more likely, the lawyer said, to get pressure put on them by your then-17-y-o who wants to buy a fast car and says 'if you love me you'd get me access to Mum and Dad's money). -------------   
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Posted By: clover
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 5:07pm
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We've not done ours yet either, shocking considering it is a large part of what I did professionally.
I personally wouldn't use public trust, free to do them yes, but their fees for administration of an estate are huge. It isn't a huge expense and any lawyer can draw one up for you. Must get on to this but like the rest of you, we're stuck on guardians.... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: ItchyFeet
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 7:20pm
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Something else to consider is how to provide for your children if your partner should remarry. DH's grandparents both remarried, the stepmothers and their children got all the estates, and the children were left with nothing. Probably not as bad for adults, but if the worst were to happen, it's more than guardianship required to raise a child, there's the issue of any assets.
I personally would never use the public trust, my lawyer is more than reasonable. The last time we re-did both wills, the charge was $112.50, so not bad considering the legal advice we had at the time when drafting it. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: crafty1
Date Posted: 18 February 2011 at 10:11pm
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The guardianship thing is tough. We recently made a will because the people who would most likely get custody without a will are not the people i would want to raise my kids. I couldn't stand the thought that something would happen to me and DH and then my darling boys would not be raised by the people i wanted.
Hard decision though, it took us ages to decide and then get the courage to ask our friends. Once you've asked something like that you can't really turn around in 6 months and say oh i've changed my mind. I think my in-laws would spit tacks if they found out too. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 19 February 2011 at 7:39am
That's a hard one. I have a friend whose DH has been married before & has a couple of grown up kids. In their wills they have everything down to the pot plants (several thousand $ in value) named who they go to. Her half is split between their children 2 ways & his half is split 4 ways to included his children. They have property under their childrens names & all item go to their children so its just a bit of cash really. Thinking about it it seems so complicated. I know both our families would sort the kids out so they would stay together & be ok. But we still need to put something in place for them, just hate to think of not being around for them especially while they are so young. I want my personal things like jewellery & things past to my by my family to go to my kids. DH has a son from a relationship when he was young, we got together 5 yrs after he left that relationship. He left everything behind & signed over the house to her. We don't have a good relationship with him. DH thinks by not putting him in the Will there will be no problems & I don't want to take the chance. As far as I am concerned DH has given enough & we paid heavy CS for yrs & am now building up our things for our family which have taken the back seat for yrs. I know that sounds harsh. I am not opposed in giving him something personal from DH side of the family...not that he would want it more likely only money would appeal. |
Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 20 February 2011 at 4:12pm
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If you're in Auckland, you can get a free will made next week, in return for a donation to Mercy Hospice. Details are
http://www.mercyhospice.org.nz/news/201102-freewill.asp - here Edited to fix link. ------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 20 February 2011 at 5:00pm
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flissty that go to an email address...
its ok - got it. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 20 February 2011 at 5:30pm
| what is it? I don't have outlook |
Posted By: amme_eilyk
Date Posted: 20 February 2011 at 5:53pm
| jazzy you need to be careful about dh's will, as there is the Family Protection Act 1955 which enables certain relatives to contest the will if they are not provided for. |
Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 20 February 2011 at 6:32pm
Thanks I will have to look into that. That is what I don't want DH thinks by not including him all will be fine & that he wont think he would get anything anyway & he is probably right but don't want to take the chance. If DH was to die first then everything would go to me & not the kids till I die & I would not leave him anything. Not that I would not give him anything but it would probably be from DH's family after they have all gone & it would not be money. Wish it was not complicated & if we had a relationship with him I am sure things would be different. |
Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 20 February 2011 at 8:35pm
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Funny...I just gave my solicitor instructions on Friday for my will, as I don't currently have one. Mine is made slightly difficult by the fact that although the girls would go to their dad if I passed away, I wanted my parents to also have rights in relation to their upbringing otherwise they would miss out completely on seeing the girls grow up, even though they are such a huge part of their life now.
I don't have any assets, but what I do have would go to the girls anyway. I will, at some stage, get life insurance as well. |
Posted By: Chickaboo
Date Posted: 20 February 2011 at 10:10pm
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me and Dh did our wills just before heading off on a big trip to Uk and USA - hated tot hink if something happened we had nothing in place. At the time we had 3 kids now that we have Elodie we really need to update it.
We never got charged for setting it up and we got told it doesn't cost to ammend it either. For the reason some of you guys have not done one I made sure i did as I did not want some people to have my kids and knew that I wanted my parents as gardians (and so did DH) oh and things like rings and things (CD collection mentioed) I would just make sure members of your family know - we did not add these into our will but basicaly have told people whose getting what - we also wrote a list that we placed withour copy of the will of the things we wanted people to have) Just like life insurance it is important but we all seem to put them off. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: sbeach
Date Posted: 21 February 2011 at 11:14am
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just a note on possibly excluding someone from your will. DH's family has all kinds of issues and his Mum and Stepdad dont have anything to do with DH's brother but instead of leaving him out of the will they have left him a tiny amount. Their reasoning is because of that Act if they left him nothing he could contest it and a judge (or whoever decided) would not know the family history but would probably realise there would be a reason for leaving him a tiny amount. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">  http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: jazzy
Date Posted: 22 February 2011 at 1:13pm
There must be some way you can do a will & leave what you want to people you want. It should not be on the grounds they are related. If DH was to die first does that mean the stepson can can contest the will as everything would go to me. |
Posted By: kandk
Date Posted: 22 February 2011 at 9:38pm
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If you want to leave someone out who 'should' get something, it can be a good idea to write a separate letter to go with the Will explaining your reasoning. That way if the Will is challenged, your (hopefully valid) reasons are set out clearly for the judge to take account of.
As for writing your own, while it can be done and can be valid, unless you know the ins and outs of it, it is very easy to get something wrong and not have the result that you intended. For instance, if you write "I leave my house at 27 Smith St to my son Joe", but when you die you actually own a different house, he won't get it. So best to shop around and get one drawn up professionally. Some lawyers do them for free if you are a client or doing other business with them. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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