VB or C-Section to avoid further damage?
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Topic: VB or C-Section to avoid further damage?
Posted By: melopop
Subject: VB or C-Section to avoid further damage?
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 2:37pm
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Hi Ladies,
So DS was born in theatre with the help or forceps and epesiostomy after being induced and aprox 3.5 hours pushing (he was posterior and was just not coming out) After the birth I developed an anal fissure, which is a tear inside the anal canal. The muscles spasm when you go No2's and it re-opens and bleeds. It was honestly the most horrendous pain ever and I was in tears and screaming everytime I had to go to the toilet 
I would have to soak in hot baths 3 times a day, I found it painful to walk and some days had to feed DS lying down because it hurt too much to sit. I was all booked in to have surgery for it, but couldn't at the last minute. The specialist had to cancel the op because the drugs I had to have could not be taken while BF, and would stay in my system for 3 months. It was such a difficult time and looking back I think I developed or was close to PND as a result. Anyway.....it's a long story really, but this fissure ruled my life for about 8 months. 12 months after the birth and I still have it, but no where near as bad. It flared up a bit over Xmas with the crap food I ate, but it's manageable now. I am scared to death about doing even more damage with pushing during another VB (we are planning to TTC early this year) and I know there are cases where woman have lost all control in that area as a result of trauma, and I don't want to end up soiling my pants for the rest of my life  I also don't think I could cope with going through that agony again with 2 children to care for.
My question is (finally  ) Do you think I should be considering an elective C-Section or would you try VB and take the risk?? A midwife friend and my mum and sister who are both nurses said there is no way they would risk another VB. Has anyone experieced a situation like this before or anyone with any thoughts about it?
I know it's something I have to talk through with my Dr and midwife. But am wondering wat you lovely ladies think. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Replies:
Posted By: 1st_Time_Preggies
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 3:29pm
| Hmmm I have NOT been in your situation, but I think an elective c-section would definitely be the way *I* would go. What a horrible thing to have to have, on top of looking after a newborn! And if there was any risk of it happening again/getting worse, I think I would avoid it. |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 3:42pm
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Same, I think I would be looking into the C-sect route too...
Although there are other risks with that too... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: jano1
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 4:02pm
| Personally I'd go for the elective option myself, sounds like a rough journey for you so far. |
Posted By: shadowfeet
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 4:28pm
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c/s I think. Sure c/s are harder to recover from than a straightforward natural birth but I think it would aggravate the problem even more so would be more painful than a c/s recovery ------------- 
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Posted By: Whateversville
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 4:37pm
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Hmmm, I'd probably go with an elecitve. Surely (if all goes well healing wise) you'll heal ALOT faster from a c-section then the 8months+ you've suffered this time.
ETA - I'd also def talk over ALL options with the MW/OB etc 
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Posted By: LJsmum
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 5:34pm
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go with an elective i've had 2 and the recovery is not that bad i was up walking around the next day and back to normal just a bit tender. You just have to take it easy for a few weeks but i had no issues.
go with an elective best birth expereince ever -------------  
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Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 6:04pm
I think I would be opting for the c/s, ouch 
You might find that is what gets recommended to you anyway, or perhaps they would recommend a trial of labour and a c/s if you get to the same situation as last time rather than using the forceps. Hard to know, could you speak to your previous m/w? she might be able to give you some rough advice before you TTC ------------- 
 
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Posted By: melopop
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 6:34pm
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Thanks for your thoughts guys.
I know there are risks with a C-section too, and of course that wouldn't be my ideal option, but I guess at the end of the day like you say Pillow_Fight, the recovery from a C-section is likely to be much quicker than what I've had to put up with. I really hoped (as you do) that THIS time round I'd be able to push baby out on my own and that the birth wouldn't be such a terrifying experience......I guess at the end of the day as long as everyone is healthy it doesn't really matter. I will be interested to see what midwife/OB says, but I want to be a bit informed myself incase they put the ball in my court. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 8:28pm
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Oh ouch you poor thing! I suffer from those nasty fissures as well, though not as bad as you.
I would 100% be opting for a CS if I were you, as further damage down there would just be awful. I have had 2 CS's, two healthy babies, recovery from my elective was great! yeah there are risks, but in your situation I really think it would be....kinder. |
Posted By: tiptoes
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 8:29pm
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That sounds like a lot to suffer through, you poor thing. Are you still looking at doing the op?
Do you know what the chances are of making it worse? If eating a rich diet makes it worse it sounds like it might not take much 
I'd opt for the c-section too. It will probably be a walk in the park compared to what you've been through! I had an emergency c-section and the recovery was a lot easier than yours. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com">  
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Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 03 January 2011 at 10:31pm
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What you went through sounds horrible and I can see why the other option sounds nicer!
The surgery you were going to have, are you able to still have it? I would def talk options over with mw, doc, ob, whoever but the c-sect definitely sounds like the better option in term of recovery (everything going well of course) compared to last time and tbh if there was a risk of it happening again I think I would be too terrified to give birth again and would def be going down the c-sect route. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MuppetsMama
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 10:48am
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i would go for an elective. I had a horrendous first VB too, not a fissure but serious damage done that is still not fixed 2 and a half years on. I went for an elective with my 2nd and boy i am soooo glad i did! It was amazing! Recovery was absolutly sweatless compared with my VB.
ETA: my midwife and various others were mentioning that i should try for a VB and i am very very glad i went with my instincts and stuck with the ELCS. |
Posted By: melopop
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 1:49pm
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See that's what I'm thinking MuppetsMama, I have a feeling that midwives etc will push for a VB, but at the end of the day it's ME who will have to suffer any long term effects, so I want to be ready to speak up for myself if I just don't feel comfortable risking a VB.
Were the midwives etc supportive in the end or were the trying to convince you to try VB? Did the leave the choice up to you? Glad you had such a good recovery 2nd time around ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MuppetsMama
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 2:44pm
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Exactly, and that was my deciding factor - it would be ME that had to suffer if it didn't work.
My midwife was great - she even came to the hospital and was with me throughout the CS, which she didn't have to do (she is an independant, and the hospital like to use their ones normally - Middlemore). She did want me to deliver naturally if I could, as she is big on being as natural as possible, and she mentioned it pretty much every time i saw her (along the lines of, "are you still wanting to go ahead with the elective?") but she still respected my decision and never pushed me. She's awesome 
Be firm on what you want, whatever you decide, and don't let ANYONE push you into doing something you don't want to do! It's your body, and you are the one that deals with the outcome, good or bad, so it is your decision. Yes it is true that VB is better for mum and baby, in general - but in cases like our first births, an emergency would have been better I think! My 9lb 6oz DD was black with not breathing when she was born. The hospital staff will potentially be pretty pushy for you to have a VB, they were constantly asking me why I was having an elective, even on the morning I was due to have one. So you do have to be sure in your mind, and perhaps even have it written down on paper. |
Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 3:04pm
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Oh no,you def don't want to be trying to look after a toddler/preschooler and a newborn while having THAT to deal with as well....I would opt for the elective too,and when you ring your MW,tell her straight off the bat,and if she has a problem with it,ring round till you find someone that wont push you in a direction you don't want to go ------------- 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: melopop
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 7:25pm
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Good advice TheKelly, and funnily enough Dr Oz said the same thing on TV yesterday ;) He said make sure you OB or midwife is on the same page as you and supports what you want, if not find one that will.
Part of me feels like "Oh suck it up, natural is best you will just have to deal with whatever happens" But then there is a lot of pressure to have a VB and elective CS seem to be looked down on unless absolutely unavoidable....Bloody society. The other part of me knows there is potential to do real damage and my health both physical/mental are imoprtant factors too! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: MuppetsMama
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 7:55pm
TOO RIGHT!! And that is far more important than what "society" says
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melopop wrote:Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 9:01pm
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I think you have every reason to have a Csect and if anyone says anything then I would mention what happened last time and then see what they say!
At the end of the day it is completely your choice and I agree that you need anyone who is going to be involved in the birth on the same page as you because you are the one who is going to have to go through it all, not them so it's your choice - not theirs. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 9:32pm
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I would go for elective too, in your position. I've had emergency and elective c sections, and seriously the recovery is not that bad (no where near as bad as what you've been thru anyway!)
You should NEVER have been left to push that long before intervention!! My doc (GP was my LMC) has seen so much of that sort of damage done (and worse!) because midwives will not call the obs (they don't get their final payment if the birth is via emergency c section) if something goes wrong. this really makes me mad, as its completely avoidable and they should be thinking about the mum/bubs health not their pay packet!! Definitely find another LMC. and one that understands from the start you will be having an elective. If a midwife won't take you on, shes not the right one for you hun! Good luck. ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 06 January 2011 at 9:52pm
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I thought they got paid if you were in labour but ended up with c/s but not if you had an elective?
I'll ask my mw on Tuesday what the deal is. -------------
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Posted By: MuppetsMama
Date Posted: 07 January 2011 at 7:54am
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I was left pushing for that long too, before they gave me 3 episiotomies; front to back (well, they call it 1 but they had to cut me 3 times) to whip babe out as she was not breathing, but it wasn't my midwife's fault - she tried to get the dr to come and help but he took one look and told them to leave me. independant midwifes don't have any say in a hospital once they have asked the drs. perhaps that is what happened in your case too...?
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Posted By: melopop
Date Posted: 07 January 2011 at 8:42am
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Thanks ladies.
I had hospital midwives not an independant one. So was under hospital care from induction. So not sure why they left it so long?? OMG MuppetsMama.....that sounds terrifying!!!!!!! You poor thing ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Nutella
Date Posted: 07 January 2011 at 1:20pm
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I think state of mind is an important thing to consider, I know I would be super nervous if I tried for a vbac, so not sure it would be good for me or baby. I wouldn't blame you at all for wanting a c sect!
I didn't find it hard recovery wise and while I would have liked to go all the way with labour all that matters is the health of baby and mum and stuff anyone who looks down on someone who choose an elective c sect! ------------- 
 Oct 11
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Posted By: Vanillabean
Date Posted: 07 January 2011 at 10:12pm
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What you went through sounds really bad. I would be surprised if you didn't get PND after that. Pain is a huge risk factor for depression.
I had an emergency c-section and I found the physical recovery pretty easy. I basically didn't feel anymore debilitated than I did when I was nine months pregnant and that just lasted a few weeks. I really wanted a natural birth but if I had your experience I would seriously be thinking about having an elective c-section next time around. And if that is what you decide you want I think that is entirely reasonable and I'm sure that you will be able to find an LMC who thinks so too. ------------- 5x mc, Jan 08, June 08, Nov 08, May 09, April 11 http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: TheKelly
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 11:37am
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Society? stuff society.
"society" doesn't have to live with the aftermath,you do,so society can bugger off,and if society is too closed minded or judgemental to see the reasons why you are opting for an elective,then society can take a running jump -------------
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 11:51am
I had the same MW both times, and she got paid both times. Caden was an emerg CS, and Bella was an elective, didnt effect how my MW got paid, I was chatting to her about this a little while ago. |
Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 08 January 2011 at 3:17pm
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Yeah if you labour the mw gets the full birth payment, if an elective but the mw goes they get a special circumstances payment. Not as much at the birth payment but way less work and time so I think it works our fair!
As soon as you get an epidural/induced/augmented or any other complication the medical team know what is going on and your mw is most likely talking with them even if they don't actually come in and see you. |