What would you do?
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Category: General Chat
Forum Name: General Chat
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URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=34909
Printed Date: 23 August 2025 at 1:00am
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Topic: What would you do?
Posted By: _SMS_
Subject: What would you do?
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 6:37pm
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I really want another baby now, but if i were to go back to work instead we would be alot better off financially.
If i were to have a baby, we would have enough money to pay our bills, even that would be a struggle some weeks, id really need to cut down spending etc. I would have to BF & use cloth nappies which i have no problems with. But we would have no extra $$ for anything. If i were to go back to work for a few years we would have the extra money to spend but i would be putting off TTC for at least 3 years. What option would you choose? Although i want to choose the 1st and have a baby, i need to be practical about this -------------  
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Replies:
Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 6:43pm
I chose the first  It amazing how well you can adjust to a new budget. My kids are close in age, and the idea was that we get them out of the way and then move onto me going back to work, bigger house, etc etc etc. Lol instead I'm going back to work next year, DH is going to finish his other degree, and then we'll go back to kid making for the next too but it was good in theory!
I guess it depends on how close you guys want your kids to be in age, and how tight the budget would really be. -------------  http://lilypie.com"> |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 7:07pm
I would choose option 2 and work a bit first if you can, I saw your other post and judging by what you said it sounds like it would be a real struggle  ? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: HuntersMama
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 7:18pm
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If it were me Id work for a bit aswell and get more financially stable. Then you can stay off work for longer with bubs, rather than stressing about paying the bills. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: _SMS_
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 7:21pm
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Also going back to work would depend on me finding a job which really wont be easy & also getting DD into daycare which also wont be easy.
Im thinking of doing porse, i have a meeting with them on Wednesday. But i dont think i would get much money from doing it. -------------
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Posted By: _H_
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 7:30pm
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Sabrina, i would go with having another baby. DP doesnt earn much but if i get UTD we are going to make it work, even though im going to have work a couple of days a fortnight.
I have thought about working longer before TTC but both DP and i are in the same place and know that we really want a baby Edit- its helen BTW  ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 7:32pm
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I'll sit on the fence. I'd redo my budget, go over everything.. insurance, power, phone the works and shop around for those. I recently did this and have found an extra $50+ a month from those ones. Learning to cook in new ways saves loads of money.
Porse although may not make thousands for you, it will still be extra money that you can use for those unexpected bills and expenses. And there are other ways to make money while being a sahm, it just depends if you really wanna get out there and make it like junk mail runs etc. |
Posted By: High9
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 7:37pm
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I don't think you get much money doing it either.
I guess job hunt and DC hunt... If you don't find anything in x months maybe try for a baby? eta for spelling ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 7:43pm
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Why not Porse and TTC in unison? ------------- http://lilypie.com"> |
Posted By: Renee & Lauren
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 8:30pm
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Sabrina, my advice to you as a mum who has been in your situation is this:
A - Put your wee one on a few daycare waiting list - state that you want to have full time (as if you only work parttime you won't get called first over a full timer but they will offer you a place if you say you are full time and then when they call say you have changed your mind to part time). B - Apply for jobs that you are really interested in. I know that you want another baby but you are still young and 3 yrs is not that long really (it will fly past believe me). But I would go back to work to help the situation and so you can be more financially stable when you come to TTC. ------------- http://lilyslim.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 8:39pm
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Given how long it took us to TTC, I'd go back to work to help with the household finances, or find some source of income.
In 6 - 12 months time, you may have some savings and you'll qualify for PPL etc. You can continue to TTC if you like, or have a larger age gap between your children. Struggling with money isn't much fun, it takes away a lot of the joy of being with your children if you're always worried about making ends meet. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: BeLoved
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 8:42pm
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I would say option 2 thinking with my head and not my heart, and of course option 1 if I thought with my heart.
The one thing I think is financial pressures and babies can be very straining on a relationship and if you were a little further ahead financially even if it was just by another year or 2 then that would take a lot of the strain off, also if you are working you will qualify for the PPL that you don't get if you are not working, when you have no.2 We are thinking about TTC for number 2 and I am working (2 days a week) and will make sure I am up until as close as possible to when we have number 2 so that I can qualify for PPL and also save a bit of extra money for when I am not working, I know that this way I will be able to offer more of myself as a parent when we don't have extra financial pressures, which in turn cause other pressures of their own. And also when it comes to age gaps I believe that its more to do with your childrens different personalities as to whether they grow up close or not, not to do with the age gap itself. Not that you mentioned this but thought I would just add it in 
Whatever you decide, best of luck. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 9:26pm
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Maybe look at the longer term picture. If you went back to work now and had a baby in 3 years would you then be able not work for a few years and be able to spend some time with both kids or if you did option one, how long could you make it work before you had to go back to work.
For us, by going back to work after DS1 and DS2 help set us up a bit more financially. Now that DS3 and DS4 are here I can spend the new few years at home without the financial pressure. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: _SMS_
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 9:32pm
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Also when i say go back to work, it wouldnt be to earn alot of money, by the time i lost wwf etc & payed daycare & travel costs, i might only get $50-$100 each week, if that. So i would literally be working only to have a very small amount of extra income.
Thanks for all your help. I ahve an appointment set up with Porse, also applied for a few jobs this evening so i will see what comes of that -------------
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Posted By: GuestGuest
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 10:31pm
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Work. No question!
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Posted By: Babykatnz
Date Posted: 26 July 2010 at 10:49pm
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Hmm... I am in the baby camp. I was in that very position when Jae was a NB, and deciding whther to go back to work when my matenity leave ended or not. We worked out that after paying preschool, I wouldnt earn much more than if I stayed home and used the WFF money and accom supplement to help pay the bills. We get by each week, and DP still gets his sky tv, and we have broadband so I can do my computer course extramurally (We cut back on everything else and allow that one 'luxury' each). We decided that it worked out better for us to have baby now, and go back to work once s/he is old enough for daycare, rather than putting Jae in DC, then pulling her out when i go on PPL again, then putting her BACK in when I go back to work after THIS one. We cant afford DC without me working.
I also do some mystery shopping to allow myself a little extra spending money ------------- Brandon - 05/12/2003  
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Posted By: lilfatty
Date Posted: 27 July 2010 at 6:56am
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I would take work hands down ... stressing about money doesn't allow you the opportunity to REALLY enjoy your kids because you are always wondering how you are going to pay the bills!
And although $100 a week may not seem much to you at this point in time .. its a huge amount of money when you are trying to pay all your bills.
I dont know you very well, but ive seen some of your posts and it seems you are having a hard enough time of it now .. adding another child is only going to make it 1000 times harder. Just my 2c worth. ------------- Mummy to Issy (3) and Elias (18 months) I did it .. 41 kgs gone! From flab to fab in under a year  http://www.femininefitness.co.nz/category/blog - LFs weight blog
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Posted By: Nutella
Date Posted: 27 July 2010 at 2:54pm
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Yeah I tend to agree with lilfatty, $100 a week is a lot of money, that is $5200 a year...imagine what you could do with that?
Which really has nothing to do with the baby part...but that is really hard because I know I would go for number 2 but I am not in your shoes and can't even imagine being in your postion (being way older...) ------------- 
 Oct 11
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Posted By: blossombaby
Date Posted: 27 July 2010 at 7:00pm
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I personally will be doing the 2nd opition heading back to work - not so much for the $$ but to help us get ahead! We want to buy a house in the next 24 months and go on an overseas holiday. Number 2 is set to be about 5 years away .. I have a good job earn decent money and am lucky to have free child care ..
Have you thought about a parttime job and have a friend look after DD while your at work and you can do the same for her?? this will save the child care cost? Or how about heading back to work and TTC while working and then you end up doing both and should even get PPL!
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Posted By: monikah
Date Posted: 27 July 2010 at 10:01pm
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im biased but i say #1. we are skint as, live off veggies alot and i regularly skip lunch but i wouldnt trade it in for the world. me and DH werent willing to let things like money dictate what we do or we felt that we might get caught up in a whole bunch of things that would stop us getting on with life. its hard but we make it work and i actually really enjoy that we dont spend money on anything we dont need if that makes sense though it might just be that we are really odd. lol i think even if we had the money we would waste it and probably be in the same situation as we are in now. lmao! honestly though i would look at what is is you actually want to do in your heart and not what your situation dictates. just an opinion though, totally feel free to ignore :) ------------- 
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Posted By: Richie
Date Posted: 27 July 2010 at 10:42pm
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I'd say baby as well. We have been discussing this recently..... Originally we were going to buy a house etc then TTC #2 but then realised that when we have a mortgage etc, we will have way more bills to worry about so wont be able to afford to have me off work for long so figured it's better (for us) to do it tough for a few years, get the 'having kids' part of life out of the way then I can go back to work (part time only - and Mum will look after kiddies as I'm not a fan of daycare at such a young age) and that way I know that we will be finiancially secure for the more expensive years of the kiddies lives ie School etc
In my opinion, you can never truly afford to have kids but you just somehow make it work iykwim. Do what your heart says is the right thing to do -------------  
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Posted By: Babe
Date Posted: 29 July 2010 at 8:07pm
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I'd say baby. DPs hours got cut right down last year - we had enough to pay the mortgage plus about $30 p/wk for bills and food, sometimes not even that. I was pregnant and we had a toddler. We made do, it was definitely not easy but it wasn't terrible either.
Put in a small vege garden, make your own cleaners, eat simply - as an extra benefit you'll be healthier
Remember you get quite abit more WFF with a second baby plus that extra 8 week payment so you might actually end up better off financially than if you went to work. -------------   
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