It's definitely not an Auckland thing. I have lived here for 5 1/2 years. There is one good frined here, but she has 3 kids and a really busy life so we don't catch up that often, but chat weekly. After working long hours and travelling lots back to the other end of the island, there was never much time or opportunity for making friends. Am also really shy which doesn't help. When an opportunity does arise to meet new people and make friends, I seem to have lost the ability ... But our coffee group is great and there are girls in there who are potentials (iygwim), so there is hope!

[QUOTE=Chickoin]Friendless over here too Seriously, not a single one.
[QUOTE]

Me too

I had lots of friends while at school and uni and never had any problem meeting people, but they all moved away and our friendships fizzled. The ladies in my coffee group are fantastic and I get along with them really well, but like someone else said, I miss having that type of friendship where you can just rock up to their house uninvited and put the jug on IYKWIM

I actually wonder if I'll ever have this again

((hugs)) hun. It's really hard having a new bubba and no close friends. I haven't felt like I have many- or any- CLOSE friends but by nature I'm fairly introverted although some of the girls on here who know me IRL would debate that lol. But I DO now have a MUCH larger group of 'friends' or close aquantincies (sorry can't spell) IYKWIM?  and totally unlike how I used to be before I travelled overseas alone, I don't stop and think about it. I'm just glad to have them and I now know that close friendships can take years to build so I just dont dwell or it or worry about it IYKWIM? Not saying you do lol, just I feel glad to have a large circle of cool Mums who I can meet and have coffee with and there's enough of them to keep me busy if that's what I want.

I really REALLY enjoy my own company though- always have- so I have to sometimes force myself out to meet folk- and thats a reflection on me, not on them. Most of them probably don't even know that.

I havea  PIN group, who are cool but yeah no one connection there with anyone but its not been a year yet so that may develop. One or two OB friends who are developing into deeper friendships and the rest are cool ladies who if a closer friendship develops then great and if not thats great too cos I still enjoy their company

I say good on you for organising a coffee group for like minded Mums, also is there a hobby you used to enjoy adn maybe you could join a group like that? eventually you do build up a cirle of people you enjoy being with. Try not to dwell on whether it will last the years or anything..you sounds like a nice person so.just let things unravel as they do and before you know it you'll be inundated with loads of mates

I've found it really difficult to make friends down here, I feel like the oldest first time mum women are grandmother's by the time their my age down here.

I've also had close friends who have lost contact since they've had their children.

I think it does take a bit of effort to maintain friendships, I have a great friendship with a women I've known since I was 20, mostly cause we make an effort to see each other when we're in each others neighbourhood.

Having small children can make it difficult to get out of the house too. Dh isn't the most sociable person either, his work is mostly male and I don't have a huge connection with any of the other wives. They're friendly enough but not close.

For me I've had to really get out of my comfort zone and go along to meet ups etc, and get to know people, I feel incredibly nervous each time I go but rather that than be lonely.

Its weird as I meet more people and made some great friendships in my 2 years in the UK far easier than I have living in different parts of NZ.   Sometimes I get the feeling that if you didn't go to primary school together people aren't interesting in being friends with you. Bit sad really.

The people I went to school with were horrible, I went to an all girls catholic school and they're all bitchy and catty. I see some of them on FB and none of them have changed. They weren't nice to me then and can't see that much has changed.

I've made more friends through playing sport and work.  Havn't played sport much since I'm moved south though, too fricken cold!  Hoping to join an Akl team next season and hope that generates some friendships.

One thing I have found especially since getting married. Is before a lot of my friends were male and I never had a lot of female friends.  Dh doesn't have a lot of close friends and I havn't formed any close relationships with their partners etc.

Here is the poem that fattarts was probably referring too - hope it helps.

When someone is in your life for a REASON, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed outwardly or inwardly. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, or to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally, or even spiritually. They may seem like a godsend to you, and they are. They are there for a reason,you need them to be. Then, without any wrong doing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they die, Sometimes they just walk away. Sometimes they act up or out and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilleed; their work is done. The prayer you sent up has been answered and it is now time to move on.

When people come into your life for a SEASON, it is because your turn has come to share, grow, or learn. They may bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it! It is real! But, only for a season. And like Spring turns to Summer and Summer to Fall, the season eventually ends.

LIFETIME, relationships teach you a lifetime of lessons; those things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person/people (anyway);, and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas in your life. It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant. Thank you for being part of my life.....