Hardest Transition
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=31341
Printed Date: 29 August 2025 at 5:16pm
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Topic: Hardest Transition
Posted By: FionaS
Subject: Hardest Transition
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 9:29pm
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To those of you with mulitple kids - which transition did you find the most difficult to adjust to?
0 to 1 child 1 to 2 children 2 to 3 children 3 + Interested to hear different thoughts and experiences.  ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Replies:
Posted By: surfergirl
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 9:33pm
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Great question! (obviously I can't answer...) ------------- http://www.alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 9:43pm
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Well I only have two but will answer anyway...
Obviously to the first child as it was a major lifestyle change! But I have heard that going from 1 to 2 is harder than 2 to 3 and so on. Anyone care to agree/disagree or explain that? |
Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 9:47pm
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I've heard the same Emz hence the question ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 9:48pm
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having three young kids is hard. they all have such different needs and you have to slot them in with each other. for instance i have one at school, one at kindy and the other one at home with me. Neither of the boys have been at the same stage before, and at one point i had one in morning kindy and one in afternoons. when they are all older it may be different except if they all want to do different sports or other activities. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: MrsMojo
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 10:03pm
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I can't speak from personal experience but my mum and I were talking about this awhile ago and she said 2 is harder than 1, 3 is harder than 2, 4 is harder than 3 but by the time 5 & 6 come along it's no harder because you can only be busy for 24 hours per day. I guess it's different for each family and each baby but it doesn't get easier when you add a newborn (jmo) -------------  
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Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 10:07pm
5 & 6! Pass. That is a lot of kids  ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 10:32pm
0 to 2  I had no idea what to do with one baby, let alone two at the same time!! I imagine one baby will seem easy next time, even if it does take us to 3 kids....well, I hope that's the case anyway!!
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Posted By: mamanee
Date Posted: 02 February 2010 at 11:03pm
| 0-1 at first was very daunting and at the time I reckoned it was pretty hard, but looking back and with the knowledge and experience I have gained since then, I realise that 1-2 is SO much harder! I've only recently had #2, but so far it's been pretty full on as S doesn't sleep during the day anymore, J doesn't settle until well after 11PM each night and still wakes twice, and I am hating this hot, stuffy, muggy weather. Takes time to adjust, but we're getting there! |
Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 7:37am
| 0-1 felt hard. 1-2 was hard at the start but now just feels normal. When you have 2 you do think 1 is easy though. And I do admit to looking at my friends who only have one and think "wow, imagine the time you could spend, and the tantrums and behaviour you could avoid" |
Posted By: jaycee
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 7:50am
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I love that none of the Mums with 3+ kids have answered this question yet - they must be too busy
Great question though. I imagine that it is the logistics that change with 3+ (that whole 'more kids than hands' thing!) eta - typo -------------   
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Posted By: Cassie
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 8:01am
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0-1 was a big transition for me because she was 1yr old when she came into my full time family. 1-2 wasn't that difficult, but possibly because Ivy was a little bit older. 2-3 I worry about, and have heard that it's the hardest transition. Have also been told that 4 is way easier to handle (no-one is ever left out, where as with 3, that is often the case), and not a huge shift at all from 3. ------------- ~Cassie~   
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Posted By: HippyMama
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 8:04am
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0-1 for me, 1-2 was challenging but we have settled into our own rhythm quite well and it hasn't been nearly as bad as I feared. ------------- Mama to two earth walkers & two angels. Remember, you are not managing an inconvenience; You are raising a human being. ~ Kittie Franz Next Slingbabies! Meet - Friday 4th May !! |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 8:04am
i have 3 but not + someone else was right tho about the newborn with other kids, that is hard. you dont have the time to devote to just sit there cuddling and fussing over your baby cause there are others needs to be met as well. The biggest adjustment is from 0 to 1 (or in some cases 2 or more)... but you dont realise how cruisy one is until you have 2! (well some people cause i always thought 1 was easy and wonder why i thought 2 would be just as easy!) ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker">
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jaycee wrote:Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 8:15am
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I found going from 2 to 3 the hardest... probably because I'd had a few years without sleepless nights, bottles and nappies.
It was also hard for me because he came early and he was so much smaller than the other two and BFing was a real chore and I really struggled with not being able to do what I'd done with the other two, of course it didnt' help that I had no support from my MW or plunket etc.. (thats a whole different story). Now that he's older I'm finding it alot easier, he's such a socialable guy and loves his big bro and sis, and they are the same towards him, which is very rewarding. ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
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Posted By: Emmecat
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 9:48am
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I've heard that 1-2 is the most tricky transition....bugger lol However, from a Step-Mama point of view, 2 is MUCH easier than 3, 4 is easier than 3 and 5 is pretty full on but yeah after 4 you stop counting and just leave them to it lol It seems to be that odd number of 3 that is hard as potential always for someone to be left out...I'm one of 3 and it was definately that way growing up (for my brother lol). -------------   http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> 
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Posted By: xLUCKYx
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 10:07am
I second this :) I obviously can't talk from experience but I imagine when having a third, the other 2 will already be used to sharing your time whereas when number 2 came along number 1 had to learn about sharing Mummy's time so it was a harder transition in the beginning. |
Posted By: mumtooboys
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 10:12am
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I find going from 0-1 the hardest, 1-2 was easy. LOL
We are debating a 3rd, I am keen, DP isn't. 
Now maybe I found it easier because in many ways I only have 1 the majority of the time during the week because of the age gap. DS1 was really great and very understanding of the fact that the baby took priority and has always been keen to help. Because of how we choose to parent I think that has helped ease the transition from 1-2 as well because I can still spend time dealing with DS1's needs while still being able to tend to DS2's needs as well. Now they are both older they have to take turns about who has to wait when they both want something at the same time; but I am great at juggling anyway.  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Joscia
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 10:22am
Funny you should say this Kate - my friend has twin boys who are nearly 2, AND another 6 month old boy. She went out for coffee the other day because she had some time off from the kids, and turned up with her youngest because he 'doesn't count', as he's so easy in comparison!
Can't really comment on the original question as we've only got DS so I have nothing to compare it to, but I initially found the transition from 0-1 to be one of the most grueling things I've ever done - enough to swear off having any more EVER. But now, as is always the case, we're thinking about #2 Though no time soon. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
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Posted By: Febgirl
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 11:06am
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0-1 here, so far 1-2 has been so much easier than I was anticipating. When you have your second baby the sleep deprivation isn't as much a shock to the system as you've already gone through it with your first so know what you're in for! ------------- Two little girls under 2! 
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Posted By: mumtooboys
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 11:54am
I'll agree with that. LOL I actually found DS2 to be our 'better' sleeper, even though he slept less. The other thing I have personally found is that I don't sweat the small stuff and instead of wanting to do everything 'by the book' I am more inclined to do what needs doing/what works and not worry so much about the 'what ifs'. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: FionaS
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 1:17pm
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I found 0 to 1 fine in some ways. I didn't notice the big change in lifestyle at all BUT she was such a tricky and unsettled baby that it was the hardest year of my life. 1 to 2 has been fine in many ways. I found having a newborn really easy second time around but am finding it harder now that both need more play-type attention but are at totally different levels.
Most people I speak to seem to say 1 to 2 is the hardest as both are young and the younger they are the harder it is. I'm sure it depends on the family but that is the most common thing I hear. My neighbour has 7 and she said 1 to 2 was the hardest and each one has been easier to adjust to since. ------------- Mummy to Gabrielle and Ashley |
Posted By: Joscia
Date Posted: 03 February 2010 at 1:52pm
7!  ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com">
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