lilfatty wrote:
I dont think id breastfeed in public .. Elias would pull off and I would create an indoor water fountain  |
My sister posted this last year, it still cracks me up.
On Sunday night DH and I were at the Ming Court at Sky City for a 12 course banquet to celebrate the wedding of the eldest son of close friends.
Now I don't know how many of you have been to Sky City, but as you can imagine it isn't exactly designed with children in mind. And while we had a babysitter for the older two, I had to bring my 3 month old baby with me as he is breastfeeding.
So around about the 4th course baby woke up and decided that he could use a snack. The restaurant was very busy and the whole place was extremely loud - so I decided to take a little wander and see if I could find a quiet corner with a comfy chair.
This was actually a lot harder than I expected. This is a casino, with umpteen bars. Quiet has not previously been included in the vocabulary of those describing it.
After being turned away from several parts of the casino because my infant is too young to drink hard spirits and gamble, I eventually managed to find a permissible route that bypassed all the perils to my young son's character and morals. This led me to the theatre end of the casino where I found a large and deserted foyer with seats.
So I sat down and proceeded to try and feed baby. By this time though he was so stimulated by the lights, noises and sights that we had passed that he wanted to party, not dine. Every time I tried to bring his head down for feeding he would press his feet against the side of the chair and his head would shoot past me.
Okay, I can sort this one out, cheeky monkey! Mummy has a few years and a lot of experience on you, sunshine!
So I got down onto the floor and sat with him across my lap where he would have nowhere to brace himself against. But do you think he would feed? NO! He was more interested in gurgling, chortling and shrieking - did I mention that there was a bit of an echo? Fun stuff!
Well, I thought, perhaps he is a little overheated. So I decided to strip him down to his nappy - this always got my middle son feeding well. In fact it works with most males - strip them off and put them in front of a breast and they immediately start paying attention.
But not this boy. He sucked enough only to start my letdown reflex. Which, for those of you who are still blissfully ignorant of the more bizzare aspects of breast feeding, this is when your breast fills up with milk which is then propelled at some force out the milk ducts forming a perfect arc up to several feet in distance.
So I am sitting there on the carpet in front of a row of seats, dressed up to the nines, with a semi naked child squirming and shrieking on my lap, one breast bare and milk gushing in a stunning arc out across the foyer.
And at that very moment three young people came charging round the corner, through the foyer until they laid eyes on the spectacle in front of them. At which point they stopped and gawped! Then continued rushing through the foyer - but now they were cracking up with laughter at the tops of their voices.
Unfortunately the ground refused to open up and swallow me so I was forced to admit defeat, cover myself and baby up again and slink back off to the dinner.
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