Are you finding out?
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Pregnant
Forum Name: Pregnancy
Forum Description: Pregnant! Wanting to chat to other mums-to-be (or dads-to-be)? Share your thoughts, experiences, and ideas... This is that place!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=24913
Printed Date: 25 August 2025 at 8:51am
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Are you finding out?
Posted By: LenaJudson
Subject: Are you finding out?
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 11:44am
|
If you are having a boy or a girl?
Also reasons why you are / aren't finding (or found)out if you are having a boy or girl... I'll get the ball rolling, We are going to find out what we are having as we feel preperation for DD will be easier if she knows if she is getting a baby sister or brother... also makes it easier clothes shopping!! Can you tell I am bored? (And I'm at work too!!) Oops ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Replies:
Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 11:49am
|
We didn't find out this time and we didn't find out with Jack. I would rather have the surprise. I am generally a very organised person but I just bought unisex clothing and at least I can definately use it all this time round as well. ------------- Lindsey 
|
Posted By: HippyMama
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 12:01pm
|
We found out for a few reasons... although most could be considered 'selfish' I guess.
1. So we could bond better with the baby - I have felt a bit detached from this pregnancy after 2 m/c. 2. To help DD understand better and bond with the baby before it arrives. 3. So I could sort out clothes in advance as they will be the same season (born in the same month), and we have virtually all of DD's old things in storage. ------------- Mama to two earth walkers & two angels. Remember, you are not managing an inconvenience; You are raising a human being. ~ Kittie Franz Next Slingbabies! Meet - Friday 4th May !! |
Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 12:06pm
|
We are finding out.
We've had a lot of comments asking us "don't you want a surprise" - I just reply that I think I've had enough surprises so far this pregnancy. We want to find out mainly for practical purposes - I don't want to have to find two different neutral colours for everything, and besides, most important of all, both DF and I want to know! |
Posted By: coldfish
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 12:12pm
|
Hi I found out the gender, I was desperate to know in fact. I guess I'm a bit of a control freak and like to be able to prepare myself for everything. It makes name choosing and clothes so much easier.
This will be my first child so the whole concept of a new baby is going to be exciting enough for me without having the extra excitement of finding out the gender on the day! I think too that knowing the sex helped the pregnancy sink and and for me to feel closer to the baby, that she is a real little person instead of just an 'it'. ------------- 
|
Posted By: myfullhouse
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 12:28pm
I get the opposite, alot of people expect me to know whether we are having a boy or girl and are very surprised when I tell them that we aren't finding out ------------- Lindsey
|
minik8e wrote:Posted By: LadyLizard
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 12:49pm
|
As with many things to do with pregnancy, birth and children, its 100% a personal decision and whatever feels right for you is the right decision.
DH and I are definitely going to find out, we are both first time parents, very excited, and want to know as much as we can about the little person coming to live with us! I totally respect people who don't find out, I think the hardest situation is when one partner wants to know and the other doesn't. Peoples reactions are so funny- when people know we are going to find out, some people act like we shouldn't, and I can't see how its any of their business!!!!!! ------------- http://www.alterna-tickers.com"> 
|
Posted By: Mum_mum
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 12:52pm
|
We will be finding out, mainly cos i want to be able to shop and paint nursery in approriate colours. My Brother didnt find out with either of his and although it was exciting to get the phone call of what the baby was i felt i couldnt really buy the babies any presents until they were born.
Also i just feel i will bond more with baby when i can give them a name or just know if its my baby girl or baby boy in there  ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
 Angel baby - May 2008
|
Posted By: littlestar
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 1:13pm
|
I can't make up my mind - I really love the idea of a suprise but I know it will drive me mad not knowing. ARGGH! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: CuriousG
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 1:20pm
|
We are definitely finding out - we did last time too. I think it helped us bond with DD, we named her etc before she was born. Plus with this one it means that DD will know what the baby's name is before its born.
A friend of ours recently didn't find out and she regretted it, she said she felt she didn't bond well and didn't know what colours to buy etc. But its each to their own. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: Joscia
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 1:24pm
|
We didn't find out. I really didn't want to know but DH really did - made it a little tricky! I figure it's better to have it as a surprise - there aren't many cool surprises like that left in the world, and honestly, I don't care either way what flavour we end up with. I'm also not one to stick to prescribed gender colours etc either.
------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
|
But there's no way he could find out and me not - if that was the case ALL of our friends would know before me after he'd had a couple of beers... Posted By: M2K
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 2:02pm
|
I'm hoping to find out this week, reason being I am way too impatient to wait!!
We will be painting babys room but in fairly neutral colours, as I don't want all blue or pink furniture or gear so we can use if we have another baby... Although I think once I know the sex, theres a good chance I will want to blue or pink out the place haha. ------------- 
|
Posted By: mummyofprinces
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 3:30pm
|
We have decided to wait and see.
DH wanted to know, for "practical" reasons... naming, buying clothes etc. I feel that its our first and we hope to have more which could be a different flavour anyway, neutral newborn stuff makes more economic sense. I have not had any problem bonding with baby and to DH's surprise he has enjoyed trying to guess with the old wives tales (FYI, they all lean towards girl, so we will see!). DH will be the one to tell me if its a boy or girl and I think this is another special way to include him in the birth. A bit of an old fashioned romantic me... -------------   
|
Posted By: kitechick
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 3:37pm
|
I found out but DH doesn’t know and didn’t want to know! I wanted to know so I could prepare mentally, practically and emotionally! I definitely think I am able to bond more with the wee thing!
I am really glad I did and no one else knows – I thought it would be hard keeping it quiet but its easy! Just makes it difficult for choosing baby names since I am now focusing on the one sex ... but of course DH knows me so well that I am trying to come up with a believable list for the other sex! I really think it’s a personal choice for Mum and Dad to be – I understand why people wish to have a surpise and also those that wish to know – both from a practical and emotional point of view! |
Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 3:40pm
|
We found out with Jack, and will with this one too. For us, we don't care about the 'surprise' factor - I mean hello you're either going to get a surprise at 19/20 weeks or you're going to get a surprise at the birth - it won't change the gender.
For us being on a very limited income, we would have had to buy all neutral clothes and seeing as we shopped around and bought everything on special/off TM before DS was born, that would've made it difficult. I just don't get what the big deal about having a surprise is, my grandma was all angry at me for finding out. As I said to her, it won't change the outcome. Also for us, DH was going to be deployed before the birth so we were going to find out and not tell anyone but he ended up staying home so we got to share the good news 
|
Posted By: minik8e
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 4:33pm
|
Emz - it does seem to be the older generation who think it should be more of a surprise - DF's Grandma was quite taken aback when we said we would find out, she couldn't quite understand it. Mind you, she is VERY old-fashioned in the way she thinks about children anyway. Back in her day, they didn't worry about what they ate etc etc and a lot of what happens today is rubbish and spoiling the children etc etc
DF and I have always agreed since day dot that we would find out the sex of any children we have. |
Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 5:07pm
|
We didn't find out for our first although I suspected very early on in my pregnancy that I was having a girl.
When I do get pregnant with #2 I would like to find out mainly because if we have a boy I will have to sell all my girl's clothes and buy boys clothes. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: skp
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 7:32pm
|
We are leaving it a surprise, I really like the idea of a big surprise on the day and DH is the same. We have brought unisex clothes and blue clothes (girls can wear blue to right!!) and picking out names for both sexes that we like.
I'm a bit of a control freak in my normal life so its kinda nice to be able to let nature take over and I don't have a say! We can't wait to find out either way its very exciting ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: WestiesGirl
Date Posted: 02 March 2009 at 10:01pm
|
Well we'll be finding out. Mainly because I am a bit of a control freak and want to have everything ready and organised for bubs arrival. I also want to be able to buy colours and theme our nursery in a more personalised way.
Before I was pg, I always thought I wouldnt want to know, but I agree with Emz, its a surprise either way at 20 weeks or birth ------------- Our Angel July 08 Gone but not forgotten
And to complete our family, our princess has arrived 
|
Posted By: mamazozo
Date Posted: 14 March 2009 at 11:26pm
|
I found out. I wanted to be prepared with stuff, and for me personally it made me feel closer to her knowing she was a girl and i could concentrate on girl names and all that sort of thing. also i agree its a suprise either way. The only difference is whether you get suprised at the scan, or at the birth. -------------    |
Posted By: Jessica
Date Posted: 15 March 2009 at 7:42am
|
We had always said we were not going to find out but after losing the boys and everything we went through I wanted as much control as I could the next time aorund, so we found out with Lachlan but this time around we are going for a surprise and while I have been very tempted at scans I think I am enjoying the 'unknown' more than knowing., DH thinks girl and I think boy (I think I am destined for all boys!), so we are having some fun 'what if' discussions.
Each to their own, it is totally a couples decision - like lots of things with kids  ------------- 
Our con-joined boys 20 wk |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 15 March 2009 at 10:24am
|
oh gosh yeah I found out, I found out with Caitlyn and with this one , Im too impatient, and I don't like feeling like my body is keeping secrets from me
I didn't care either way , i just wanted to KNOW . Mind you , since my son was so keen on showing the world his bits and it was the first thing we saw, I would have found out even if I hadn't wanted to , so lucky I did . I always said with my second id have a surprise, but since its been 7 years since my last pregnancy its just as exciting all over again . But now we have a boy and a girl , so the next one we really don't care what it is, perhaps we'll try and leave that one a surprise ------------- 
|