Why not breastfeed?
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Forum Description: Pregnant! Wanting to chat to other mums-to-be (or dads-to-be)? Share your thoughts, experiences, and ideas... This is that place!
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=23802
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Topic: Why not breastfeed?
Posted By: Spicy Chick
Subject: Why not breastfeed?
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:12pm
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Hey there, question from an ignorant new mum-to-be...
I'm aware that there are some negative feelings towards women who choose to bottle feed. Why? Also, why would some women choose not to breastfeed? I've heard a lot of good things about breastfeeding, nothing bad at all... so why wouldn't everyone want to bf? I hope this is not a sensitive question...? ------------- 1st baby!  
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Replies:
Posted By: skp
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:19pm
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maybe because they want to go straight back to work - I had a friend who got a nanny in within a couple of weeks and went back to work. I couldn't/wouldn't do it but hey everyones different ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:28pm
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Some friends have been on (essential) medication that would go through the breast milk. There are sometimes cultural issues where BF is not common.
BF can be really hard, esp at the start. I had no idea what I was doing and neither did my baby (even though we were in hospital for 5 days after the birth). My milk didn't come in till day 8 which was insanely uncomfortable, I got a breast infection the next day (and have had 6 since  ), and my MW only saw me for about 20 minutes a day if that, in the week after discharge so there wasn't much support with BF. I would have stopped, except a friend's mum is a lactation consultant - she came over for a few hours, and luckily my issue was reasonably easy to work on. Since then I'm lucky to have not had any problems (but everytime I get a breast infection I keep thinking "why the hell am I doing this").
------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: Spicy Chick
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:39pm
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Wow.. I didn't realize it's so hard to BF, Flissty. My neighbour's recently had her baby, and it's easy as for her. And so I thought it's easy for everyone too. ------------- 1st baby!
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Posted By: xox6Girls1Boyxox
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:40pm
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Hi
I think you really have to wait until you've had your baby and then you'll know what a BFing mother can go thru....Coz unless your gonna be one of the very small minority of people who have Zero pain or problems Bfing then you really wont know why a mum would'nt BF until you've experienced it yourself..Plus it would depend on your lifestyle also... My son is formula feed coz he was a tongue and lip sucka & it was very very hard and frustrating for him to latch on plus my nipples got a real battering from all the attemps to try to feed him so My DP & I decided to put him on the bottle, I use the tommie tippie closer to nature bottles and he still has minor problems latching onto the teat properly sometimes...So for me personally I didnt want my son to be frustrated and to upset to feed everytime he was wanting Boobies...Some people may say and or think I took the easy way out for my own benefit but I'd rather have a happy baby and not a frustrated unhappy bubba...
This is a very sensitive subject for some people, So it's each to their own I'd say & I would never judge anyone on how they decide to feed their baby...
A Happy Baby = A Happy Mum xox ------------- http://www.bump-and-beyond.com/"> 
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Posted By: FreeSpirit
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:43pm
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Reasons not too breast feed -
Medication which will cross over into milk Drug or alcohol dependency Physical problems with nipples Problems with milk supply Severe infection or mastitis Cultural issues If the act of breast feeding prevents bonding These are a few reasons I can think of off the top of my head - I've been breastfeeding for nearly 6months and still going strong, it can be hard but it is what nature intended. Always at the right temperature, no sterilizing required. If you can not, or choose not too, then it is your right to feed your baby however you want - as long as baby is fed, clean, gaining weight and happy you have to do what is best for both of you. Nobody has the right to pass judgement on how you feed your child, and I support my friends who for any reason cannot breastfeed. ------------- http://www.babysfirstsite.com"> 
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Posted By: TraceyA
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:48pm
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Basically Flissty's answer sums it up. Some women desperately want to bf and something happens that can't be sorted and the have to switch to bottle. Others don't have the info or the support to encourage them to bf so don't know any better.
There is some good http://www.fda.gov/fdac/reprints/breastfed.html - info here about why bfing is considered to be so beneficial, some of the reasons include: * lower rates of hospital admissions, ear infections, diarrhea, rashes, allergies, and other medical problems than bottle-fed babies * Breast-fed babies have fewer illnesses because human milk transfers to the infant a mother's antibodies to disease. About 80 percent of the cells in breast milk are macrophages, cells that kill bacteria, fungi and viruses. *Breast-fed babies are protected, in varying degrees, from a number of illnesses, including pneumonia, botulism, bronchitis, staphylococcal infections, influenza, ear infections, and German measles. Furthermore, mothers produce antibodies to whatever disease is present in their environment, making their milk custom-designed to fight the diseases their babies are exposed to as well. * A breast-fed baby's digestive tract contains large amounts of Lactobacillus bifidus, beneficial bacteria that prevent the growth of harmful organisms. Human milk straight from the breast is always sterile, never contaminated by polluted water or dirty bottles, which can also lead to diarrhea in the infant. * Human milk contains at least 100 ingredients not found in formula. No babies are allergic to their mother's milk, although they may have a reaction to something the mother eats. If she eliminates it from her diet, the problem resolves itself. * Sucking at the breast promotes good jaw development as well. It's harder work to get milk out of a breast than a bottle, and the exercise strengthens the jaws and encourages the growth of straight, healthy teeth. The baby at the breast also can control the flow of milk by sucking and stopping. With a bottle, the baby must constantly suck or react to the pressure of the nipple placed in the mouth. * Nursing may have psychological benefits for the infant as well, creating an early emotional attachment between mother and child. At birth, infants see only 12 to 15 inches, the distance between a nursing baby and its mother's face. Studies have found that infants as young as 1 week prefer the smell of their own mother's milk. When nursing pads soaked with breast milk are placed in their cribs, they turn their faces toward the one that smells familiar. * Many psychologists believe the nursing baby enjoys a sense of security from the warmth and presence of the mother, especially when there is skin-to-skin contact during feeding. Parents of bottle-fed babies may be tempted to prop bottles in the baby's mouth, with no human contact during feeding. But a nursing mother must cuddle her infant closely many times during the day. Nursing becomes more than a way to feed a baby; it's a source of warmth and comfort. ------------- TTC #2 |
Posted By: Spicy Chick
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:48pm
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Oh my,
I hope I haven't offended anyone with my question. Again, it was not a judgemental question at all, I just don't understand why... and thanks to some of you experienced moms out there, I now get a glimpse into the difficulty of BFing for some! So please, don't get defensive, or offended, as no offence was intended at all!  ------------- 1st baby!
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Posted By: lisa85
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:54pm
Haha this should be a fun topic 
I knew it was going to be hard the first time I went for a scan and plastered all over the walls of the hospital were numbers for breastfeeding support groups. I assumed very early on that something that requires that many support groups can't be a walk in the park. I have to admit I knew a women (before I had kids) that didn't brestfeed her babies and I just thought how terrible what a bad Mother. But you really can't ever understand untill you've been there now I'm just like her lol! I personally (I'm sure theres alot of people about to shake their heads at this) hated breastfeeding. I'm just not that person. I know its best and any future children I'll do it for the first month but thats it. I stopped after a month with my twins becasue I never produced enough milk but I felt awful. Mostly I was scared what peoples reactions would be. We push breastfeeding so hard in this country and for some women it just doesn't happen. The whole time I was breastfeeding I felt awful and it was taking 2 hours to feed both babies (i was 3hourly feeding) so towards the end I couldn't stand the sight of my own babies. (mind you I did have 2) I was a happier and better Mother once I switched to bottle and I never looked back. Myself and all 3 sisters were bottle babies and my children will be as well. Theres nothing wrong with formula my girls are thriving on it and getting my very best attention 
It just come down to if your able to hack it and personal choice. I have a massive respect for women that breastfeed its a hard road. -------------  
TTC #3 since Jan 2010 - PCOS MC April 2010 |
Posted By: xox6Girls1Boyxox
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 4:55pm
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Oh I hope my post did'nt come across as being Bitchi as it was'nt my intention, I think coz it's such a sensitive subject for some woman you'll definately get some replies that seem like they wana jump out of the page to bite you, LOL...And we all have to realise your just a curious 1st time mum that wants to gather as much info about BFing as possible... ------------- http://www.bump-and-beyond.com/">
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Posted By: xox6Girls1Boyxox
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 5:05pm
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Thats the problem is that Bfing is pushed so hard onto people especially 1st time mums and Practically every person I know thats gone from BFing to formula feeding have all said that they worried about what other people will think & there are a couple of ladies on my thread that are going thru those feelings at the moment and my heart really goes out to them because ontop of everything else going on with their Newborn baby they've got this extra pressure on them... It's quite sad really.... Everybody wants whats best for their babies.....
Spicychick I bet your wishing you never started this topic now, LOL...Im gonna go abit Off Topic now, I started a topic a while ago for this scan pic site where if you've got a good toilet shot of bubs Sonographers take a look at your pic and tell you the gender & man I only had the best intentions at heart but I started getting shot down by some people that didnt agree with my topic & I was like WTF, No ones getting hurt and it was just abit of fun etc, but it didnt go down well with some, But anyway they got my scan right... LOL.. ------------- http://www.bump-and-beyond.com/">
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Posted By: fire_engine
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 5:11pm
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Feel free to ask questions - even though I had read heaps about it, including how hard it was, I went into BF thinking "nah, I'll be the 1:100ish woman who finds it really easy" - yeah right! You're also battling hormones. And when you're dealing with postnatal hormones, life is not good (well, that was my experience).
There was a really good article about BF in the OB mag (#2 I think) that gave some stories from women who are still BF, and others who stopped. I thought it was good and balanced. I agree that there is such strong pro-BF, it can be hard for women who can't/don't. I know even introduing one FF at 3 months made me feel like a failure. They say mother guilt never stops ... ------------- Mum to two wee boys |
Posted By: weegee
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 5:24pm
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Before I start, don't worry Spicy Chick, I know exactly what you meant by your question!
I have to say that breastfeeding is a lot harder than I thought it would be, even though I'm one of those women who finds the actual process easy (no problems latching, no breast infections, no sore nipples etc). There's a lot of nervous energy taken up in getting positioning right and worrying if your baby is getting enough milk etc - boobs don't come with a gauge like bottles do! Plus the simple fact that your body is constantly working to make the milk, not to mention the calories going directly into the milk, and it can be fairly exhausting. It uses up an average of 800 calories a day, that's the equivalent of an hour's aerobics, and on top of a bit of sleep deprivation you really feel it some days! Plus you do feel the weight of responsibility - it's not like the father can whip his boobs out to placate bubs (although apparently http://www.unassistedchildbirth.com/miscarticles/milkmen.html - 10% of men can lactate  )
Don't feel sorry you created this topic, I think it's worth pregnant women being prepared by knowing that it can be difficult! I know I used to think you just put your nipple in the baby's mouth and away you went - not so! ------------- 
Mum to JJ, 4 July 2008 & Addie, 28 July 2010 |
Posted By: weegee
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 5:26pm
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And also, sorry to threadjack, but I just wanted to say - Flutterby, I've seen you around, you should come and say hi in the July 2008 thread! -------------
Mum to JJ, 4 July 2008 & Addie, 28 July 2010 |
Posted By: Shezamumof3
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 5:29pm
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Sometimes it just doesnt happen how you planned it to.
For me, i really had my heart set on breastfeeding, I tried for 4 weeks but Caden wouldnt stay latched on, my nipples were bleeding and very sore and I was miserable and so was Caden. He wasnt gaining nearly enough weight and he wasnt happy, cried all the time. So we made the choice for my sanity and Cadens well being, that we would formula feed, and from the weekend we started I had a different baby and Caden had a happy mummy. Breastfeeding IS great but it isnt always THAT great. ------------- |
Posted By: Danaj
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 5:52pm
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My sister tried with all her three but they wouldn't latch. Even the consultant couldn't help so she used EBM for 3 months for each bub. No harm done but she was very disappointed.
I want to do my best but i'm not putting too much pressure on myself if it doesn't start/work out 100%. My first choice will be to BF, second would be EBM and then formula but we'll just see how we go. I've heard so much about mental pressure being a cause for BF problems so i'm just trying to stay relaxed about the whole topic. Like Sheza said, it can be for sanity's sake. LOL, Men can lactate????? That would be too weird to watch. ------------- http://www.TickerFactory.com/weight-loss/wyI1oWn/"> 
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Posted By: Mummy_Bron
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 5:53pm
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First off - good question! If you don't know - ask! I BF my DD for nearly 11mths 'til I had a bad stomach bug and she weaned herself while I was out of action. I work part time and expressed and she had that in a bottle so the switch to formula was quite easy. BF was OK - I didn't love it but I did it and I'm glad I did. However since I have had my DD I have met several women who had awful experiences trying to BF and then guilt and shame over bottle feeding. There are proven advantages to BF but they don't necessarily out weigh other things for the mother and baby! The worst was a girl who really struggled and didn't ask for help and her son lost weight and they kept telling her that BF was important and she kept trying but in the end switched to formula. Her son is now three and has developmental delays they think are related to his poor nourishment in his first few weeks. Obviously it should never have happened and she should have had more support (i didn't know her then) but it is important to be honest with yourself and acknowledge if BF is not working. And not feel guilty! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: Mummy_Bron
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 6:18pm
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Just to clarify - the poor nourishment was when he was being BF not when he switched to formula! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: LeahandJoel
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 9:09pm
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So having just made the desicion to wean my 5 month old from breast to bottle (and am sitting here with cabbage leaves in my bra feeling like a right plonker) after having yet another bout of cracked and blistered nipples and what appears to be thrush again I wish it were so easy, that every mother ccould enjoy it but reality is that its only like that for a few, so don't be surprised if it ends up being harder than you thought it would be, and I hope for you that it goes really well and you have no issues -------------  
 
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Posted By: angel4
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 9:25pm
| i just thought i would share that i attended the breastfeeding classes at chch womans and found it really beneficial. I wonder if auckland has a similar thing that you could attend. I was four days of information but i had a ball and met other pregnant women too (BONUS!!) The other thing im interested in (for my own info) is what cultural issues prevent breastfeeding? Saw it mentioned a couple times -just curious. :S |
Posted By: Natalie_G
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 9:34pm
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I dont think anyone here will take offence to your question, it is perfectly fine to ask these sorts of questions.
I am only nearly 3 weeks into BF, in the first week I had cracked nipples, Arianne latched on fine, but the pain was unbareable I felt like I wanted to formula feed her cause at least I wouldnt be in pain at every feed. But as days went on, my nipples healed and now its not so bad. Babies are lucky they have their own personal feeding device with them all the time lol.
I am a very open person, if you find formula feeding better over BF thats your choice. Just like 6Girls&1Boy said Happy Baby = Happy Mummy. Hope the rest of your pregnancy goes smoothly and feel free to ask as many questions as you like. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
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Posted By: happymumma
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 9:54pm
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I agree - good question and this is the perfect forum to be asking so don't worry about stirring up emotions. I think the reality is that in NZ at the moment this is a hugely emotional topic for many women. I found breastfeeding so difficult for many reasons (and my little boy was getting increasingly dehydrated) so we swtiched to formula at two weeks. I still find it an incredibly difficult thing to think about and I have difficulty finding the positives in my memories of those first two weeks (which I find really sad given that it's meant to be such a happy experience).
There are fantastic benefits to breastfeeding but sometimes I think they are overpresented. For example, I believe my bond with Ollie would have been terribly affected had I continued with BF'ing so for us, switching actually strengthened our bond. I always assumed I would BF but I don't think you'll know until you get there. For some, it is a relatively easy thing to learn and for others it is torture. The bottom line is that both are effective and viable ways to feed your baby and both have their advantages. One of the huge advantages of bottle feeding for us has been that a devoted Daddy gets to enjoy feeding his son too. Sorry for the very long post. It's just a topic I feel passionately about because I think every woman deserves the right to choose how to feed her child. Keep asking...and I hope you have a great second half of your pregnancy. |
Posted By: weegee
Date Posted: 16 January 2009 at 10:27pm
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Just came back to say, http://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=6351&PN=1 - this sticky thread in the First Baby etc section would be a good read for you preggy ladies to prepare yourselves -------------
Mum to JJ, 4 July 2008 & Addie, 28 July 2010 |
Posted By: pomikiwi
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 2:51pm
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I loved BF'ing and cant wait to do it again. It's not easy and it's all down to mum, which means keeping healthy and making sure we get enough to eat and drink as well as getting up during the night.
I found a very supportive husband or partner was paramount in succesful breast feeding. Yes it hurts at first, but thats only normal as unless you're a sex maniac, lol, no-one has ever experienced sucking on a nipple 8 -12 times a day! It does get easier with the correct latch and time. I think at the end of the day you have to do whats best for yo and baby, if BF'ing is such a terrible experience then I don't see the point in baby and mum being so miserable. I guess we are lucky we have alternatives of food for our babies whenBF'ing doesnt go well. ------------- http://lilypie.com">  
DD-Carys Amelia 17.03.06 |
Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 3:12pm
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I hate breast feeding with a passion. I dunno how long we'll last. And I'm one of the lucky few with a great supply and bugger all pain!!
I do it because I feel under pressure to, and because I know at this age it is best for Hollie. I am so self concious, my A - boobs are D all of a sudden and everybody has noticed it. There is no way in hell I can feed in public, and I feel awful if I have to around family. I won't in front of males. DH and I will leave if we are somewhere out, and she needs feeding. People have looked down on me for not feeding around them, but these are my boobs on my body! I'm so unco as well, I can't do it discretely. The one thing that has kept me going is the one thing that people say no to, and thats the bottle before 6 weeks. One night a week since Hollie was a week old, Mum has stayed at my place or I have stayed there, and she has given Hollie EBM. It seems stupid and selfish, but thats why I'm not fond of it :) -------------  http://lilypie.com"> |
Posted By: Spirals
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 4:07pm
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Flake - it doesn't seem stupid and selfish at all. Like the others have said happy mum = happy baby. You need to do what's best for you both, and where's the fun in being confined to the house because you're not comfortable bfing in public?
I have made the decision NOT to breastfeed when bubs arrives - and so far I have been amazed at the reaction from the hospital staff and my midwife. They have been great - haven't judged me at all (well not out loud!!) or even asked me to justify my decision, which is great, cos I don't want to and don't feel I should have to. However, I am very wary about engaging in conversation with anyone about it as I still feel I will face opposition from most people and a lot of unwanted, unsolicited opinions. I'm even nervous about posting this on here. 
It makes me desperately sad when I hear of women who 'feel like a failure' because they haven't managed to breastfeed, or simply don't enjoy it and switch to the bottle. What is so wrong with our society that we put that much pressure on new mums to do things a certain way and then make them feel like crap when it doesn't work out. We should be celebrating our new mums for keeping their gorgeous babies warm, loved and well fed - however they choose to do it. (Sorry if that sounded like a rant in places - it wasn't meant to) |
Posted By: Febgirl
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 5:25pm
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I decided that I wasn't going to breastfeed before I had DD - being complete blunt and un-pc, the idea completed grossed me out, having something feeding off my bodily fluids! And no, I was never sexually assaulted, I didn't want to preserve my boobs for fun times only or any other cliche you might think. Please note though that I never felt disgusted seeing anyone else breastfeed - it was more that I couldn't ever imagine doing it myself.
Low and behold I changed my mind after DD was born and discovered to my surprise that I actually liked breastfeeding and it didn't revolt me like I thought I would, and I ended up breastfeeding DD without a problem for over 6 months. To be honest, the 'breast is best' message didn't particularly bother me as I was confident in my decision not to breastfeed while I was pregnant and honestly didn't care what anyone else thought, only thing that really annoyed me was lack of formula feeding info (i.e. none) given at antenatal classes. Oh, and although I think I'm the only person so far to say that they didn't or don't like the idea of breastfeeding - it's actually more common than you might think, just that most women who feel like this will never admit it as it makes you a horrendous mother
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Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 5:35pm
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I didn't have a supply or pain issue but Daniel had loads of issues with feeding.
From his first feed he didn't want to latch so I expressed into his mouth. He lost 500g of his birth weight in the first week from lack of feeding. I have massive boobs (I was a G) and like flake hated BF with a passion, not just because of the latching issues, but because I found it sooo uncomfy with such massive boobs, I never wanted to feed in public. I could only feed if I had a pillow to support Daniel cause I needed both hands to make sure he didn't suffocate from all the boob! The only position that I could get to work hurt my back like hell. Then we would have a week maybe of going good and then he wouldn't want to latch again. After 3 months I gave up |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 6:24pm
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wow Stace, your'e 11 weeks already !
Ahhh, breastfeeding , I breastfed C til she was 13 months , but man I hated it at first, I didn't realise that it actually hurts, and tbh the only reason why I perservered for the 1st 2 weeks was because at Bethany (where I lived) they made it really hard to formula feed . My friend was determined to BF but baby wasn't gaining weight, and she was miserable (my friend I mean ) so she started baby on formula , which was much better for both of them . For some women , it works for others, it doesnt, as a mum, your job is to provide food for the baby . I know its a big deal to some people, but honestly , you want something to worry about? worry when you walk past your bathroom and your 6 year old is making odd noises because she is having a "water birth" .  ------------- 
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Posted By: flakesitchyfeet
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 7:13pm
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LOL!!! Oh that is brilliant. You will have to remind her of that when she is older :)
EDIT: I said you are instead of she is ------------- http://lilypie.com"> |
Posted By: Spirals
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 7:51pm
Then let me be the 2nd one to say it - your reasons are the same as mine for deciding not to. A few people have said to me that I might change my mind once baby is born - I can't see it - but hey if you did...there's still a chance for me too I suppose. Something else recently that put me off though was when I went to a very good friend's wedding, and another friend had not turned up because she had mastitis - I would have been devastated to have missed the wedding. Might sound superficial again - but to me that was another reason not to bf. |
Febgirl wrote:Posted By: LJsmum
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 7:58pm
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I brestfeed Luke till 15 months old and Loved it...
But had heaps of support and help in the early days. Also a super fanastic DH who would line up mugs of milo for me when i was up all hours in the night feeding. He was also very supportive of BF and the time it takes. Aslo had support from a group called B4baby a breastfeeding "expert" came to vivist me as soon as i arrived home and every week in the early weeks for help support and they have an 0800 number i could call too if i had any questions or problems. This was excellent and so valuable as i had no idea what i was doing in the early days!! Ask your midwife about B4baby they sign you up. Really worthwhile.! -------------  
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Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 8:59pm
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Decided before DS1 was born that I was not going to BF. Was never questioned about it. Did do a bit of expressing in the beginning but it didn't last long. I have never felt guilty about my decision and I guess because I was quite adamant about my decision that it was never questioned.
I do believe that breast is best...thats why they are there but each to there own. You do get so much advice from well meaning people. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 17 January 2009 at 11:23pm
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Ack Leahand Joel, I feel your pain! I put up with a cracked and bleeding nipple that was agony to feed off, and recurrent thrush, from when lil miss was 6 weeks until last week and she's now 6 months! I had pretty much resigned myself to the fact that I'd never be able to feed on that side without pain but after a weeks holiday at the beach the salt water seems to have done wonders for the crack, and taking an internal thrush treatment nailed the thrush as well so I am finally pain free feeding! A lactation consultant told me at 18 weeks that lil miss was 'lucky to still be being breastfed' given the state of my nipples.
Sorry, a bit OT. Oh and I wrote the article in issue two of OHbaby! Magazine on breast/bottle feeding . I breastfed Maya till 10 months, bottle fed the gremlins EBM coz of huge feeding issues till 3 mths then weaned them onto formula and am still breastfeeding lil miss at 6 months + so I've pretty much seen both sides of the feeding debate and I can honestly say it doesn't matter which way you go as long as you and bub are both happy and thriving.
I did feel guilty that the gremlins get sick so much and blamed myself for not feeding them long enough, but then lil miss, my exclusively breastfed, never touched a drop of formula baby had pneumonia, repeated bronchiolitis episodes and chickenpox all before 6 months so I've realised even breastfed babies can get sick. -------------  Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: LeahandJoel
Date Posted: 18 January 2009 at 10:20am
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Oh I really wanted to BF for longer and as I am expressing to wean he is still getting it, but now of course it seems I have mastitis as well and even though he hasn't fed for 4 days from me my nipples are still cracked and sore I said to DH this morning that I do feel bad for not continuing but Joel isn't the only person in the family and I have to do whats best to keep me sane too. He is now on 2 solids meals a day as well (about 3/4of a tin of fruit at a time) so maybe its growth spurt time? Having done both with both kids I can see both sides and I don't get offended by questions or comments, as far as i'm concerned what I do in my family its my business and if i'm happy and comfortable about my choices others should respect that. -------------
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Posted By: NovemberMum
Date Posted: 18 January 2009 at 3:58pm
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I found the first 6 weeks the hardest especially when my girl was wanting to feed nearly every hour and all I wanted to do was sleep....1 4months (next Saturday) we are still going strong and no plans on stopping even when I do get pregnant (unless my girl decide she wants to stop herself) ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: SpecialK
Date Posted: 19 January 2009 at 9:21am
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Spirals - like you I find the amount of judging out there of mums unbelievable! And it's not just confined to BF - going back to work, day care, nappies all seem to generate huge debates. I do wish people would realise that what mums need is people to be supportive of them and their decicion rather than judge them - after all, mums just want the best for their babies, no one would deliberately set out to harm or disadvantage their child.
Personally, I intend to BF and will give it my best shot . However, if I find it painful, stressful or the baby is just not feeding properly - bring on the bottle. Oh, and I totally relate to feeling funny about BF in front of males - just the thought of doing it in front of my dad, brother or brothers in law... ick!!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: Nikki
Date Posted: 19 January 2009 at 12:41pm
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I'd just like to add - don't be worried by all the people who do have trouble - cos not everyone finds it hard. I had no pain, no latching issues, no supply issues, no infections etc ... and actually quite enjoyed it. I also found it more conveinient than having to take bottles out and make them up. But I do know lots of people who had some very real problems (or just hated it!) and I can't say I would have continued through that much pain, and if Jake hadn't latched properly etc I was willing to bottle feed if need be. You have to ignore all the pressure. And also ignore all the midwives in the hospital who tell you completely different things and confuse you!!!! Just listen to the advice that seems to work (it is a learned art!) and ignore the rest.
But even though I had no issues --- I didn't lose any of my 10kgs of baby weight til I stopped (10.5 months when I went back to work) and was SOOO hungry in the first few months (couldn't exercise or my milk supply dropped), I was the only one up in the night to feed in the early days (if I had a bad sleeper I may not have lasted so long), and I too didn't like feeding in front of men either. ------------- DS (5yrs) and DD (3yrs) |
Posted By: happymumma
Date Posted: 19 January 2009 at 5:05pm
| That's true Nikki - I have friends who've had no difficulties whatsoever BF'ing and did so happily for as long as they wished. |
Posted By: LeahandJoel
Date Posted: 19 January 2009 at 6:27pm
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My sister had no problems with both her boys............but everyone is different -------------
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Posted By: BuzzyBee
Date Posted: 20 January 2009 at 12:11am
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It does come down to personal choice and we all know that 'breast is best' for bubs because it is specifically designed for baby, with mums antibodies etc etc
BUT things never go to plan. Baby and Mums health, happines and well being are whats most important. Completely agree with what has been said above Happy Baby = Happy Mum and vice versa. We are still breastfeeding, my boy is 22 months now and yes I do have my down days about breastfeeding, but tbh I have loved the journey! It creates an amazing bond between mother and baby, something that no one else can share with my son. Whereas with bottle feeding, it can be a shared job iykwim. We have had several breast infections and took a good 3 months to get started and get past latching problems etc (we were in second OB magazine issue in breastfeeding article too). It wasn't a walk in the park for us but we made it and I'm so proud! (although wishing my boobs had of stayed nice and perky, but alas that's not the case. But totally worth it). Whatever decision you make Spicy chick, only you know what is best for your baby. Best of luck hun! |
Posted By: caitlynsmygirl
Date Posted: 20 January 2009 at 10:53pm
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Hmm bottle feeding can be a shared job , but that can be a very good thing at times. for eg, when my friend died 3 weeks after her daughter was born , it was a relief that she had bottle fed from day one (she found it too sore to bf, course she did, she had a bloodclot, poor thing just didnt know it ) and we didn't have to deal with a baby we couldn't feed, on top of our grief . Of course thats an extreme case, but still I bf and formula fed cos Caitlyn's dad was having her from an early age , and I wanted him to feed her too, and despite him living in Australia, they've always had a great bond . My mum bf me the shortest amount of time, but Im probably the one of her kids that is closest to her , certainly not my brother who she bf longer . BF certainly has its benefits, its convenient, its always there, you don't have to heat it up , or wash and sterilise (tho do wash yourself please, smelly people aren't nice haha) but it certainly isnt for everyone . Just go with the flow, the one that works best for you -------------
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Posted By: emz
Date Posted: 20 January 2009 at 11:05pm
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For me? I didn't breastfeed past 3 weeks (all that time was EBM) due to PND, bonding issues (due to latching issues which noone could fix no matter how many people shoved him on my boob) and pain from previous breast problems. It took me ages to come to terms with it as I always thought it was just the done thing and always thought my MIL was a bit off cos she never attempted to breastfeed (I don't blame the woman - she's got gigantic boobs and was on meds that the babies couldn't have - but I didn't know that at the time).
This time - I will not attempt breastfeeding at all. It's not worth my mental health, plus I've had a breast reduction. Like others have said, the thought of breastfeeding freaks me out. Never did before I tried it, but it does now. However, I am totally comfy being around my friends when they are b/fing, its just not for me. Good question though - I think as a mum to be you need to be fully informed. If you intend to breastfeed, I suggest going to as many classes as you can and possibly even contacting LLL before you give birth to book an appointment for the early days. The thing that annoyed me is I intended to breastfeed so that was the end of it - no help, no advice, no classes were offered. I only found out about all of this about 4 weeks after DS was born - too late for us. |