Tips for coping with 2 under 2!
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Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=22348
Printed Date: 11 September 2025 at 11:01pm
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Topic: Tips for coping with 2 under 2!
Posted By: xLUCKYx
Subject: Tips for coping with 2 under 2!
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 11:15am
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Hi There,
I was wondering if anyone who has had 2 under 2 has any useful tips for me? When my number 2 is born DD Gabrielle - a very spirited wee girl at that will be 15months old. I really havn't a clue how I am going to manage yet... just trying to be as prepared as possible! Any tips greatly appreciated! :) :) |
Replies:
Posted By: LittleBug
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 12:52pm
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I'm really interested in this thread as well... my wee girl will be 13 months old when #2 is due. It's kind of daunting, huh. ------------- Chloe (4 years) and Oliver (3 years). |
Posted By: xLUCKYx
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 1:02pm
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Yes very daunting!! I am really excited to have my two close together and I know we will get by somehow but I am still so scared lol!!
Congrats on your pregnancy and yay for a boy! We weren't able to find out what we are having at the scan... There are quite a few of us that I have seen who will be having 2 under 2. |
Posted By: Nefertiti
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 1:13pm
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I had a 17mth age gap between my first two....and all I can say is 'go with the flow'! Not much help, but thats all I did, and things went along smoothly.
Just make sure your older one knows that baby is coming and what he/she may expect. Explain in very simple terms. Also toddlers of that age just love to help...so involve them as much as possible. Just asking them to get a nappy or perhaps you choose two outfits, but ask the toddler to decide with one is 'best'. Involvement all the way! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: LeahandJoel
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 2:27pm
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My two are 22 months apart and Leah is very full on. I found that you just have to let things slide, don't worry if there are toys everywhere, or the dishes not done. Rest when they rest, I am normally able to get them both asleep at the same time during the day so I read my book or have a sleep, even if there are other things that need to be done take time for you, and lots of involvement is good, Leah likes to sit with me on the couch when I am feeding so I try to have snack for her to eat too. -------------  
 
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Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 3:02pm
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Mine are 17 months apart and the best thing I managed was getting them both to sleep at the same time during the day. They both still sleep at the same time now and its sooooo good.
Slow cookers are the best invention ever, you can get tea going in the morning when everyone is happy and then its ready when everyone starts to lose the plot. Take a pram everywhere, carrying two isn't fun. Have a great playcentre or playgroup so you can go when your tired and others can halp entertain number one or hold number two. Never turn away help. The bad bits go by so fast, before you know it they are playing with each other and you can relax 
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 3:15pm
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keep the hints coming...we will have a 17 month gap here too. I am trying to explain to Tom that there is a baby in mummy's tummy....which he has learnt....he also thinks there is one in his tummy and DH's |
Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 3:22pm
there is 18 mths between my boys and i never explained a baby was coming at all and he was fine with that. didnt act out or anything. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Nefertiti wrote:Posted By: My3Sons
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 3:42pm
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I had a 21mth gap, I second what Rach&Jack said, if you can get them down for a nap at the same time it is great!! ------------- Mum to Mr 10, Mr 6 and Mr 4 
 
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I used our crockpot heaps! And for those first few weeks, things will be chaos but it does get better, I didnt sweat the small stuff and only achieved what I had to. My 2 are just starting to interact more now and it is fantastic!!Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 5:56pm
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We have 15months between jake and taine. npw it's great. remember that. it WILL get better.
Things to watch for: toddlers are very curious creatures. Taine had his first taste of choclate at 3 weeks when jake "shared". taine was also poked and prodded a lot. we had to teach Jake how to be gentle. he just didn't know. Rubbing, not patting is good. baby einstein dvds were fabulous and I second playcentre. jake ran off and was supervised while I fed. I found breastfeeding a real chore as Jake would want things. Keep a bottle of water somewhere toddler height, and some books nearby when you feed. also was VERY easy to let myself go. i forgot to eat lunch a lot and got run-down and tired. |
Posted By: floss
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 7:06pm
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I had 3 under 2 when Noah and Lola were born Sienna was just under 18mths.
I don't really have any advice but cook some meals to put in the freezer, don't stop doing the things that you did before No2 came along like Sienna went to music and playgroup so make sure you keep doing that so its not such a big change for No1 ------------- My beautiful big girl Sienna 15.04.06 Double the trouble double the fun Noah & Lola 10/11/07 |
Posted By: ShellandBella
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 8:01pm
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Great thread!
Thats so funny Nikki! lol Bella hasn't got the concept that theres a baby in my tummy, but she points at it a lot. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 8:26pm
I never thought about explaining to Spencer that there was a baby in my tummy, I just assumed he would be too young to get it Oh well hopefully he won't be upset by his brothers arrival. He does hug and kiss my belly but I think that is just cos its huge and squidgy
My plan was to wing it  I have started freezering (if that is a word) some meals for Spencer so that I have stuff ready for him. I intend to continue with playgroup and coffee group and swimming. Luckily for me the timing is great as swimming won't start again till mid feb anyway which gives me a bit of time to get things sorted out. I'm also intending to take up all the offers from antenatal group to take Spencer for playdates etc.
What i'm worried about is what to do if they both wake up at the same time. Spencer is a bit of grumpy bum in the morning till he gets his bum change and bottle (99% of the time he wakes up with a poo in his pants) and I can just imagine being sat down feeding the newbie when Spencer starts howling the house down ------------- 
 
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Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 8:29pm
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I had three under two too but the other way around to Floss - gremlins were 20 mths when lil miss arrived.
I was like Bizzy, I didn't talk much with the gremlins about baby coming as they didn't really seem to understand. Once I told Mercedes there was a baby in my tummy and she replied "woof woof"
I had friends staying when she was born to help look after the girls while I was in hospital but I made sure DP was the first one to bring them up to visit her, I wanted it to be a special family time. And when they came to visit I spent some time in the day room with them while DP was in my room with baby - special bonding time for him and bub, and special time for me and the gremlins. I agree about not stopping the things you do with your older child after baby arrives, lil miss had her first outing to playgroup at 12 days old and Mainly Music at 15 days old. I also try to make those times about the gremlins, was easy when she was little as she'd sleep in the capsule so I could do the music, dancing etc. with them which made it their special time. Now I either put her in the Moby wrap or on a blanket on the floor in a safe spot as she's awake for most of it. I also agree with not trying to do too much. I get stressed when the house is a mess and there are toys everywhere but at the end of the day you can only do what you have the energy for and some days feeding baby and chasing a toddler or two is all you can manage. Freezer meals are the best idea ever, don't say no when people offer to bring meals etc. (I tried but they kept coming!), the crockpot is the best investment ever, closely followed by the electric frypan which means I can throw together a stirfry or bolognese in less than half an hour. Agree with Liz re: DVDs while feeding, altho I had a double problem as mine wouldn't just get bored while I was feeding, they'd fight coz the knew there was nothing I could do about it. Thankfully lil miss is a quick feeder and they've become more patient with time. Sleep when the kids are both asleep if you get the chance. Oh and the most useful piece of baby equipment I own - the Moby wrap. OK, I don't own it, I was lent it, but it enables me to be 100% hands free and lil miss loves it. I used it when we're out and I have both gremlins in the buggy, and when she was smaller I used it at home when she was unsettled in the evenings and I needed to be able to do gremlin baths etc. Wow, what a novel! It helps that I am right in the middle of it atm, but like everyone else has said, every day it gets easier. In the beginning it can seem like one foot in front of the other and the days all blur into one, but the hard part only lasts for such a short time and it's all worth it to see them interact with each other. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
 (02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: My3Sons
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 8:35pm
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winging it is a good plan I reckon!! ------------- Mum to Mr 10, Mr 6 and Mr 4
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For the first few weeks I had Leo on my knee as well every time I fed Drew, however he soon figured out it was quite boring and went and found something else to do. Didnt take him long to learn to "share"his mama, not that he had a choice mind you! Basically what I worked with with 3 in the house was whoever needed me the most, like when I needed to get the older 2 into bed Drew would sometimes have to wait, and vice versa. Cause no mama is an octopus!! One upside is that Drew is so used to noise and chaos he is so placid and doesnt bat an eyelid lol!Posted By: Maya
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 8:53pm
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Ha ha, lil miss is the same - the house could fall down around her ears and she would sleep thru it!
I think winging it is a good plan too. The odd time I've had to leave lil miss to cry for a few mins while I sort the gremlins but it's really only been a couple of times, the rest of the time she's either woken earlier so I've been able to feed her before they wake or vice versa, or I've been able to fend them off with a piece of toast or a banana while I tend to her. I love when I give lil miss her first morning feed and tuck her up in bed with me and one by one the girls come in and we all snuggle up together, it's so much fun. ------------- Maya Grace (28/02/03)
(02/01/06)
The Gremlins:Sienna Marie & Mercedes Kailah (14/10/06)
Lil miss:Chiara Louise Chloe (09/07/08)
Her ladyship:Rosalia Sophie Anais (18/06/12)
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Posted By: busymum
Date Posted: 10 November 2008 at 9:03pm
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Do babysitting swaps with your eldest child from time to time - just an hour off in an afternoon is enough to have a quiet break.
Balloons and nail polish are great sit-down things to do together. Put away some toys now to get out for when baby is born so that the toddler has some interesting things to keep occupied. There's a couple of older threads on this same topic, you could run a search and see if you can find all those tips... ------------- |
Posted By: LittleBug
Date Posted: 11 November 2008 at 9:29am
All this advice is awesome  and so useful.
I'm so scared about having two that I am making DH take 5 weeks off work when #2 arrives I'm especially paranoid about BF since it was such a battle with Chloe. I have no idea how I will BF and look after another baby.
I have no idea how I would try to explain another baby coming, to Chloe! I just don't think she would understand, she's so young. How do you cope with a mobile little toddler (Chloe isn't mobile yet but I'm assuming she will be by 13 months) when you are BF and stuff!? Does anyone use a playpen or anything? How do you manage it? ------------- Chloe (4 years) and Oliver (3 years). |
Posted By: Davochick
Date Posted: 11 November 2008 at 9:51am
| There are 17 months between my two girls. We pretty much wing it most of the time. I am having trouble with my new little girl sleeping during the day, so it is difficult to get them down at the same time for any length of time. I continued sending my first born to daycare twice a week because that is what she was doing before her sister arrived. It also gives me some one on one time with my new baby. Having snacks and water handy for the older one while BF is definately a life saver. |
Posted By: xLUCKYx
Date Posted: 11 November 2008 at 10:01am
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Thanks everyone - loving the tips!!
I am getting Gabrielle a lunch box and back pack for christmas. I am going to put lil snacks in her lunch box and different bits and pieces in her bag each day (well this is my wee plan anyway) to give her something to do while I'm feeding the new baby. We have set Gabrielle's room up as the nursery too as they will be sharing eventually - but I have my nursing chair in there so can sit back and watch Gabz play with her books and toys while feeding.... Gosh I feel a whole heap better though just hearing from some other Mums who have done it before and it sounds so worthwhile at the end of the day :) |
Posted By: LeahandJoel
Date Posted: 11 November 2008 at 11:27am
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Just remember it will take a little time for everyone to adjust, but once you are over that things tend to sort themselves out. Leah just adores Joel and can't wait for him to wake, she loves having a bath with him and playing on the floor with him. They learn pretty quickly and also at this age they can't remember what it was like before the baby came once its been here a few days! -------------
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Posted By: Rachael21
Date Posted: 11 November 2008 at 1:46pm
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I never explained things to Jack either but we had talked about babies and 'gentle hands' .
There will be times when you have to leave one of them crying while you deal with the other which can be hard but they get used to it. One of the hardest things for me was feeling like I was neglecting Jack when Caprece needed me and he wasn't interested in 'helping' so I would just go as fast as I could and then play with Jack. It is so worth it my two are best friends now I'm not even invited to their wee parties. |