40ish and wannabe a mum?
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Name: Planning Pregnancy (trying for baby)
Forum Description: Trying to get pregnant? Going through fertility treatment? Just planning your first or second child? There are many people out there in the same boat to help and listen and share with
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=18998
Printed Date: 19 August 2025 at 6:56pm
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Topic: 40ish and wannabe a mum?
Posted By: bubbles
Subject: 40ish and wannabe a mum?
Date Posted: 09 July 2008 at 6:48pm
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Hi there,
My husband and I are are only now starting to try for a baby...its a long story as to why we havnt earlier, so I wont bore you with that. Im feeling the urgency as you can imagine - many of my friends have almost or actual teenagers! Just wondering if there are nay other older mums who might want to either chat on here, or email, or maybe even meet up (im in Wellington) - for mutual support and story swapping etc?? |
Replies:
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 09 July 2008 at 7:09pm
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Well I'm 35 and hubby and I are planning to start trying next year when I'll be 36. Not sure if that qualifies me as an older mum.
Feels it as everyone seems 10 years or more younger. I'm in Feilding and work in Palmy, we have family and friends in Wellington so try to get down there as often as we can. Not as often as we would like with the cost of petrol. For us, well I only met DH when I was 27 and took 7 years to get him down the aisle. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow">   [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 09 July 2008 at 11:54pm
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Hi Fleury,
I think you responded to me the only other time I posted on here - many months ago... back then I was mentioning how my Husband and I were having some questions about our relationship and therefore whether to have a baby....now we ready to go, are going to be a bit clinical and try the ovulation monitoring/stimulation drug clomiphene from my next period - in two weeks ish! And try to get the baby making happening. Its not so romantic but better than nothing at all, I have mixed feelings but mainly excited - most of the time. |
Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 12:10am
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Hi bubbles, I'm not a 1st time mum but I am almost 39 - sssshhhh I was 34 & 36 at the birth of my girls and we had another m/c last year. I'm down in christchurch. Karl & I met in Sydney just before my 29th birthday & I had to propose to him to get things underway so it had been a busy time since we got married in 2002. Good luck with your cycle monitoring, I was never very good with that & just planned our "cuddles" very carefully/luckily Hope to hear some good news from you soon ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 10:52am
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Hey I'm 41 and TTC number 3! And live in Wellington. Have two boys already (had them at 35 and 38). Had a MC in May. I have found that this time around it has taken longer! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: kezplanet
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 11:26am
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good luck linda ------------- Kerryn, Mum to Ashlyn(29/3/04), Anastasia(1/11/05) & Abigail (24/02/09) |
Posted By: ginger
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 11:34am
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*lurker in* I loooove your tinkerbell linda! *lurker out* ------------- Cuinn Lachlan 23.1.09 - 22:00 Antonia Helene 4.8.11 - 09:41 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 12:04pm
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HI Linda,
Someone my own age!! Can I ask - are you trying to get pregnant 'naturally' or with any type of assistance? Fertility wise I seem to be ok and so does my husb, but we have mucked around for lots of reasons and now to be business like about it, so Im going to try the monitored cycle. The fertility clinic suggested I go straight to the hard stuff: IVF (because of my age) but I know im fertile, havnt tried as hard as I could have(!), and my husb and I have some moral ehtical probs with IVF. Soooo for me, its all riding on this monitored cycle plan for now - Starting July 13th ish. |
Posted By: Redbedrock
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 12:27pm
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I guess i count as an older one too (although i still only feel 16 most days) I was nearly 37 when Fay was born (35 when we started TTC), we are heading to the question about no2 at the moment, Fay is nearly 2, the clock has stopped ticking now it's boinging away so I know we need to make some decisions sooner rather than later. Also in wellington.
I was also pointed in the direction of assisted fertility when we started trying, but at that time i felt my need for a baby was not that strong, a sort of wait and see if/what happens approach. Not sure how I will feel when/if there is a next time tho Hope you get some good news soon ------------- http://www.babysfirstsite.com"> 
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Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 4:45pm
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I 'stole' the ticker from another web site....presume thats ok!
We are trying to get pregnant naturally but that fact that I am 41 does add its own stresses. First thing is to get pregnant and then its getting to the 12 weeks. I got pregnant after I had been on a diet so not sure if it was losing 10kg that helped or eating well. Have they suggested Clomid? That was another thought but think you can only get that via a fertility clinic and figured that it would take a while to get an appointment. And that big question...when should you stop! When are you to old. Not ready to face that yet. Maybe you should give it a few cycles naturally and then go from there. ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 5:00pm
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Thanks Redbedrock and Linda,
Linda, I will try a few cycles (with Clomiphene) and see what happens... Id love to keep in touch with Wellington's late 30's - 40's (yet cool, funky, and young looking of course!) mums...I dont know a lot of ple here after having recently moved from AK, and certainly no one with baby making on their agenda! Im quite over-awed about the process, am realising that baby making - if successful, will change my life in so many ways and thats both terrifying me and is also very very exciting. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 7:02pm
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I moved from Auckland, down south and have found it vastly different living in the Manawatu, where everyone seems to have their babies young.
We've (read me) decided to do one more round of BCP and will be going off in 6 months time for good. I don't have any fertility issues, (i've been pregnant before) not sure if that gives me false hope though, as fertility at 25 is a lot different to 35. DH he is younger than me 32 so hopefully his swimmers will be good and healthy. Good Luck with your journey, hopefully I wont be too far behind. DH has said he finds it a little scary, I think he's used to his life as it is, not a fan of change at all. He just doesn't realise what a great dad he will be. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 10 July 2008 at 8:45pm
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Hi Fleury,
keep me posted on how you go, as you and I are both currently childless and trying (I think you are childless?). Yes the move from AK is always going to be a contrast - to everywhere else. For me it was a great thing, im not a fan of AK at all, and I lived there most of my life...I much prefer Wgtn and the smaller community vibe here, and its more arty, bohemian, interesting, and wild (weather-wise) too which I like. All the best. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 11 July 2008 at 9:56pm
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I love Wellington lived there for 2 years, while I transitioned from Akl to the Manawatu, if only DH could get work there I'd move tomorrow.
However I am taking advantage of the low cost of living in Feilding to have a lovely home and be able to allow my children to walk and ride their bikes to kindy and school. I had a successful appointment with my Drs and yes he suggested not waiting until i'm 40. I do need to lose weight and get regular exercise. Got a prescription for folic acid through him as well $3 for 3 months worth, bargain. Good Luck for you too, hopefully we'll join the pregnancy threads sometime soon. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 12 July 2008 at 5:34pm
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Oh sorry Fleury I got confused - you ve got kids already...!
Re folic acid..... I take very high doses. I did some intensive research and apprarently theres some evidence that for older women, 5mgs of folic acid per day (the standard prescription is for 800mcgs) may help prevent downs syndrome as well as neural tube defects.... These things are always contentious though, and theres bound to be other research that says something different. I guess Im being super cautious because I havn't got any kids to prove that I work properly in the baby making department! Anyway, Good luck to you too. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 12 July 2008 at 6:30pm
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No you aren't mistaken, I don't have children already.
Should have clarified these are things I'd like to do. I don't know what the issues are re Folic acid, I know its to help with the development of the neural tube, and my Dr said to take 800mcgs each day for 3 months before and after conception, so as soon as I come off BCP as can't always be certain when conception takes place. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 12 July 2008 at 9:05pm
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Oh dear...I've only been taking 1 x 300mcg tablet a day. Just got some redseal ones that are 400mcg. So should I be taking two per day or more???? ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 13 July 2008 at 2:06pm
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Check with your Dr, 800mcg is what mine said, not sure what effect taking less will have. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 13 July 2008 at 4:12pm
| The research I did said that 800mcgs per day is considered enough, but if you take up to 5000mcgs / 5mgs - which I take, it may (I repeat may, the research is inconclusive as yet) help with prevention of downs syndrome as well as neural tube defects. It makes me feel better anyway. Some people get nauseated on high doses of folic acid so you have to do what suits your body as well. |
Posted By: mylilmosaic
Date Posted: 13 July 2008 at 7:09pm
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Hi bubbles & fleury
DH & I are 35 & 38 respectively and have been actively trying for our first together (I already have a 13 yr old from previous relationship) for about nine months now. I certainly thought it would be alot easier than it has been so far, but we are off to see a specialist at Fertility Assoc's in Hamilton in August so I will be pleased to get some answers and to see what they suggest. I wondered whether they might put me on clomid first, Im more keen to try that first rather than go straight onto IVF just because its alot less stress on the emotions etc and on the body, well hopefully it is. Some months I ovulate and others I don't seem to, so clomid might be useful for me. I also take 800 mcgs of folic acid, not sure if I should be taking more to be honest, will have to check that with the specialist. Anyhow just thought I'd introduce myself, as we are a small group us older mums (only in actual numbers I might add  )  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: mylilmosaic
Date Posted: 13 July 2008 at 7:11pm
Oh I nearly forgot hi to you too Linda  ------------- http://lilypie.com">
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Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 14 July 2008 at 6:00pm
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HI older mums trying to conceive, Im wondering about starting / suggesting a meet up group in Wellington (central?) for 35-40's women trying to conceive. Is anyone interested?
By the way my second religion is the 'only buy coffee (incl decaf and hot chocolate) in places that dont look like petrol stations' religion, so no Mc Cafe meet ups please!! I suppose I should put the idea in the groups thread... but seeing as there are older wannabe or actual mums in the approx Wgtn region here, I wondered if some of you might be keen - even if it was once a month or whatever suited people. |
Posted By: caliandjack
Date Posted: 14 July 2008 at 8:16pm
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Hi Jaxs and Linda, good luck to you both.
I hate to admit it but McCafe in Palmy makes the nicest mochaccino's, my favourite. It would have to be a weekend, I'd be interested, I'm planning on coming down to Wellington some time in the next month so name a date and I'll come. ------------- http://lilypie.com" rel="nofollow"> [/url] Angel June 2012 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 15 July 2008 at 8:37am
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Great, it would be nice to meet you Fleury. I'll put a notice in the groups thread too, to see if there is more interest.
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Posted By: linda
Date Posted: 15 July 2008 at 7:18pm
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Sounds good to me...I'm fine to have a coffee met up where ever. Bubbles, whats your first religion?
And hello to Jax and Fleury. I know what you mean about thinking it wouldn't be a problem to have a child esp as you already have one. I thought with having two boys already that the third one would be easy but so far its not to be ------------- http://lilypie.com">
Alex 6 and Harry 8 |
Posted By: bubbles
Date Posted: 15 July 2008 at 8:48pm
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Hi Linda and everyone, great that you are interested in starting a group. Ive put a message in the groups part of the forum too.
I'll be starting clomiphene (the monitored cycle) in three days time - yikes! Its come around very quickly... |