Sleeping woes
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=13035
Printed Date: 14 September 2025 at 5:23pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Sleeping woes
Posted By: DJ
Subject: Sleeping woes
Date Posted: 17 December 2007 at 12:59pm
|
Hi all Anyssa is driving me up the wall with not sleeping. She's 6 weeks old today. I'm keeping her awake during feeding, and then putting her to be when she starts yawning and grizzling after her feed and a bit of play time (usually after an hourish of being awake). I swaddle her (in muslin since it's hot), and we go thru a little bed routine of talking thru the alphabet cards on her wall. I put her in bed at about "J" and keep talking to her until Z. Then I leave the room. She will either lie in her bed awake for 45mins/ hr with a bit of grizzling or scream the place down. But not sleep! I let her cry for varying lengths of time. She now stops crying as soon as I go in - like she has already worked out that crying summons Mum. Sometimes when i go in I pick her up to make sure she hasn't got wind, and other times I just pat her and talk to her and leave the room again. Sometimes she might finally go to sleep, but it's not for long because it's almost time for a feed again. Other times she stays awake so long, it's time for a feed. So I feed her and she is so tired she falls asleep on the boob - and it's tempting to just plonk her in bed at this stage, but then she hasn't fed properly or burped, so she wakes up soon with wind, or hungry... It doesn't make too much difference if I give her the dummy or not. Help! Any suggestions welcome... ------------- http://lilypie.com">  http://lilypie.com">
|
Replies:
Posted By: .Mel
Date Posted: 17 December 2007 at 1:47pm
|
I follow the babywise technique with Cooper and so far so good, we've been using if for around 4 weeks now... it's very similar to what you are doing with Anyssa. My only thought when reading your post was that maybe you need to cut down the awake time after the feed? I only keep Cooper up after his feed between 30-40mins.
Are you feeding her on a strict routine or are you flexible? If you are feeding her 3hrly then it will be say 7.30 feed - 8.00 - 8.15 play - 8.15 bed then feed again at 10.30. Don't let her go over that 3hrly - 3 1/2 hrly time period.. That's my only suggestion. The only other thing is, if she's falling asleep and you feel that she's had a good feed put her down for a sleep. And.. she is only 6 weeks, and from my own personal experience with my 3 kids they tend to "hit their straps" from the 6 week mark, and routines and things just seem to slowly fall into place. I hope that helps??? ------------- Mr Mellow (16) Miss Attitude (8) Destructa Kid (3) 
|
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 17 December 2007 at 2:12pm
| If you wanted a break and help go to your local plunket family centre for the day. They can watch what happens and how you deal with it and try a few things to see what works and they have helpful suggestions. Also it gives you a little break. We went there with Daniel a couple of times for similar reasons. |
Posted By: NikkiB
Date Posted: 17 December 2007 at 5:00pm
|
DJ, have you tried not talking to Anyssa or making eye contact when you go back into the room? I do this with Rex so he knows the difference between 'sleep time' and 'allowed to get up'. I always make a big fuss when its time to get him up.
Rex was very similar at the same stage and it turned out that he wasn't getting enough milk from me. Have you to good milk supply? Is Anyssa putting on a good weight gain every week? ------------- A very lucky mummy to two gorgeous boys: RB 3/10/2008 JB 29/12/2009 |
Posted By: DJ
Date Posted: 17 December 2007 at 7:35pm
|
Thanks guys. Mel, I've been trying to have her up for not much more than an hour including the feed - I watch the clock and her to see when she starts yawning before I attempt to put her to bed. Let's hope she does start to improve now she's 6 weeks! Stacey plunket are coming for the first time on Friday - I'll see what she has got to say. Nikki, I'll give the no eye contact thing a go. I'm pretty sure I've got enough milk - she put on 300g last week (she's 5.2kg, was 4.02 at birth). Thanks again. She has basically not slept for more than 15mins at a time since 10am. This evening she's had a bath and a massage, was wide awake and happy after than, so had more play time, then a good feed (she drifted off at the end, so I put her in bed at 7. She woke up, and is now screaming the place down... sigh... ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: kabe
Date Posted: 17 December 2007 at 8:07pm
|
Oh dear, I can totally relate to what you're going through DJ. Eva would go all day without a sleep. It's just in the past 3 weeks that her sleep has improved. Basically we did what you've been doing along with some tough love! In otherwords, leaving her to cry until she self settled. We found that going to check on her all the time, made things worse. If she was still crying after 40 mins I'd feed her, and then she would settle. Eventully she cried for less and less time and now it's usually just 10 minutes, if that. We found also found that putting her to sleep before she got too tired, made her settle much easier. ------------- http://alterna-tickers.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: 3boys
Date Posted: 17 December 2007 at 8:35pm
|
She is so young - she will grow up fast! Don't get hung up on what you think you should do - do what works for your baby.
Let her drift into sleep while feeding if this is what she naturally does and enjoy the beauty of being able to offer this comfort to your baby - nobody else can. 
Maybe her cry is telling you that she needs her mama to comfort her to sleep. I gave in, and I love it. Of course, if this doesn't suit you then just ignore my rambling.  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
|
Posted By: Mum2ET
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 8:42am
|
Have you tried using white noise? I find it works really well with Ella (even now) when she won't go to sleep- particularly when she gets overtired. ------------- Mum to Ella (5) and Tom (2) |
Posted By: Bel
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 9:38am
|
Hey Dj, I have had the same problem with Luke the last week or so - he just stopped sleeping so well during the day. I am trying to up for an hour thing too - he is asleep now, and seems to sleep alright in the morning, if I gethim down fast enough, but then the afternoon falls over and he won't settle. Luckily for me he still sleeps really well at night, and isn't really too grizzly when he is awake, so I am leaving it at the moment and seeing what happens. He really only gets upset when I try to put him to bed... If he does sleep he only does 1/2hr and then is up again - hard work aye?! ------------- Mum to two beautiful kids 
Luke (09.11.2007) Amy (01.04.2009) |
Posted By: Jennz
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 9:48am
|
I'm with 3 boys with this one- I cuddled both my babies to sleep! I got the 'rod for your own back' comments but they soon stopped when my girls started sleeping like angels. Don't want to get into the whole CIO debate but since its not working for you or Anyssa maybe you could try letting her fall asleep on you and then putting her down. You said that she stops crying when you walk in the room so she obviously just wants her Mummy- if you meet that need for a while maybe it will comfort her enough so she knows if she needs you, you'll be there and she'll be more confident being left on her own after a while. Its a process but it worked for us. ------------- Jen, Charlotte 7 & Kate 3 
|
Posted By: NikkiB
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 10:24am
|
I also leave the radio on in his room...I always have the radio on in the lounge. ------------- A very lucky mummy to two gorgeous boys: RB 3/10/2008 JB 29/12/2009 |
Posted By: lizzle
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 10:29am
| I went throught the same thing with both my boys - they would fall asleep on the boob and then after i put them down - wide awake. in my case I wasn't feeding them enough, so they were just snacking - and waking up hungry again. I ended up feeding them for an hour nealry, and then putting them down. For the first few weeks this was still a sleep battle, but after that they settled down. i hated letting them CIO though and would cuddle as well. |
Posted By: miss
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 12:15pm
|
I do think some babies just can't do CIO or CC - lily will not settle if she hasn't after 5 minutes (unless it is a winding down grizzle) and so I will go in to her rom and sort of shke her gently as she lies in her cot. 5 minutes, she is out like a light. Much better than trying to sit through an hour of screaming and eveyoen feeling bad!
And other times she happily puts herself to sleep. At 6 weeks I reckon do what feels right. Bubba is still so little then. -------------  
|
Posted By: DJ
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 1:57pm
|
Thanks so much guys. I think I might relax and go with the flow a bit more. This morning I spent 20-30 mins cuddling her and then rocking her in her bed until she went to sleep. She did drift off (sadly for only 10mins). Even though that takes time, it is way better than all the crying. I let her fall asleep on me after her feed at lunchtime, and she transferred to bed. She was really tired by then - had been up since 8am apart from her 10min snooze, and we had been at the dr for her 6wk check. We've got friends who have to lie in bed with their kids for about an hour every night to settle them - I really want to avoid that, but maybe she is a bit little at the moment, and I am expecting too much. Thanks for your advice - and BTW loving the christmas photos! ------------- http://lilypie.com"> http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: 3boys
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 9:23pm
|
Don't worry about having to lie with them, the routines and habits will be set over time as she grows and develops. If you don't want to end up lying with your kids for them to go to sleep, don't worry you won't.
My first two are great sleepers (despite having been rocked to sleep as babies) and have been for a long time - they don't need me to go to sleep. I am sure Cohen will be too - when I let him grow up!! ------------- http://lilypie.com">
|
Posted By: Alisa
Date Posted: 18 December 2007 at 11:23pm
|
Hey DJ - my plunket nurse said that Sam was too young to learn any bad habits when he was stressing me out at 6 weeks and he hasn't, have you tried the sshh sshh pat pat method ?? Check out baby whisperer website if interested.
Also agree with the no eye contact or talking to bubs when its time for sleep. Are you wrapping ? I was beside myself with Sam but slowly but surely after 7 weeks he started to show me what his routine was and now its just lovely, just take one day at a time and do whatever it takes to make things work for you and bubs, there is no right or wrong answer here !! good Luck !  ------------- http://www.bump-and-beyond.com/"> 
|