Breastfeeding...
Printed From: OHbaby!
Category: Have A Baby?
Forum Name: First baby? Second or more?
Forum Description: Want help? Need support? Want tips? Men and women share advice and tips in this supportive community
URL: https://www.ohbaby.co.nz/forum/forum_posts.asp?TID=10454
Printed Date: 13 August 2025 at 9:41pm
Software Version: Web Wiz Forums 11.10 - http://www.webwizforums.com
Topic: Breastfeeding...
Posted By: MelanieAndBree
Subject: Breastfeeding...
Date Posted: 03 September 2007 at 9:07pm
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Should i feel bad that im not getting into this breastfeeding deal? I thought i would.. but im so sore and everyone is saying "you'll get it dont worry" and i know its only been like a week, but i dont think i can keep it up.
Everyone is saying "you have to breast feed" blah blah. And today i was in tears cause i cant do it. Everyone makes me feel guilty cause i want to stop and put her on formula. Help? ------------- Melanie. Mum to Briahna Robyn, 3yrs |
Replies:
Posted By: meow
Date Posted: 03 September 2007 at 9:13pm
If you look in the white pages under La Leche league, you can find a lactation consultant..your baby might have trouble latching on.. they can offer guidance too. I'm sorry you're having such a hard time with it 
The truth is though, that it isn't easy, you have to work at it. I remember being sore for a few weeks but it did get easier.. then it was pretty much a breeze. Have you got some nipple cream (can't remember the name, but you get it at the chemist). It really helps with the pain. Whatever you decide, I hope it works out for you  ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: MILF
Date Posted: 03 September 2007 at 9:35pm
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get some lansinoh, it is in a purple tube from the pharmacy, and it will help.
it really does come down to how much you want to feed, because you do have to persevere, you do have to work at it, and it is uncomfortable. set yourself goals, think you want to get to a month, then you want to get to 6 weeks, then 3 months etc etc. it does help. your milk has only just come in, and it is a really difficult time as you and briahna try to settle things down. your hormones are all up in the air too at the moment, and things that dont normally seem hard become impossible. there will be times you will want to cry at the sound of your baby waking up, you will dread having her anywhere near you, because you know you will have to feed her - and i dont mean because it will hurt, but because it is very hard to get your head around the level of dependance on YOU. noone else can feed her, and that is hard to come to terms with. be nice to yourself though, try to treat this time as the 4th trimester. keep her close, dont think you should be getting out and about, or doing too much. give yourself time to recover, and settle into your new job. persevere, if that is what you want to do. know that in 8 short weeks time it will become easier. but if you really dont want to carry on, then stop. i only offer this advice: you can always start formula, but you cannot start breastfeeding again. and when your hormones are back to normal and you are feeling less like you have been hit by a bus, how are you going to feel about stopping? ( i know its so annoying when people go on about the hormones and tiredness etc etc, it sucks being a cliche, but it is true unfortunately.) goodluck, i hope things get easier soon for you. briahna is a beautiful wee thing, you must be so proud of her! ------------- Lyla - mum to Xanthe -  my big 4 year old 
and Jordis - 1 year old 
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Posted By: Bizzy
Date Posted: 03 September 2007 at 9:52pm
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MILF said it really well i think. You are at a vulnerable place right now. it isnt easy to start with, it wont come naturally, but that doesnt mean you are doing it wrong or are a bad mummy. i agree too you should set yourself a target...tell yourself that you will give it your best shot for a certain number of weeks (4, 6 or even 2 if thats all you think you can handle) and then reassess how you honestly feel about it. if you decide to go formula get as much info as you can about it and make sure you are 100% comfortable with your decision.
take it easy on yourself. ------------- http://www.myfitnesspal.com/weight-loss-ticker"> 
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Posted By: Mazzy
Date Posted: 03 September 2007 at 10:20pm
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It's all been said so well above, but I wanted to add my support and tell you that I too found it really hard with breastfeeding to begin with. It took a long while to get confident and actually begin to enjoy it. There was a while there where I cringed everytime DD cried because I just couldn't face another feeding session.
I love it now, and will be really sad when DD weans. Can your midwife help? Not much help, but sending hugs your way and hoping you have a good night tonight. ------------- Mum to two gorgeous girls! |
Posted By: kebakat
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 8:34am
| I think that the first 10 days are the hardest. Once I got to 2 weeks things started to get easier to me. I thought of giving up several times but I just decided to be very stubborn and keep trying. It does get easier with time.. especially once your milk settles down completely. |
Posted By: cuppatea
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 8:47am
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Hi,
I found it really difficult too, I got engorged when my milk came in and ended up with mastitis and cracked nipples. You can buy nipple shields to help with the pain. Although my bub would not latch on when I tried to use them. I also expressed from the most painful side, I had more than enough milk so was able to feed him on one side for 24 hours which really helped and I put the extra in the freezer for later on. I have now put bub on formula because the mastitis kept coming back and gp was not happy about giving me antibiotics every other week plus was making me miserable. I think that it would be good to set yourself a time to try until and then if you're still not happy stop. If you end up still dreading each feed etc it will not help, it is far better that bub has a happy healthy mum than breastmilk. Just don't stop before giving it your best shot as you may regret it a few weeks later when things have settled down. Also do you have good support at home, it very important when breastfeeding to concentrate solely on that, and helps if someone else can take care of house work, and even bathing and changing bub so that you aren't trying to do everything and that you are able to sleep while bub is sleeping, the exhaustion compounds everything and blows it all out of proportion. 
And if you do decide to stop and anyone especially strangers make rude remarks, like the lady in countdown who told me I should be nursing when I picked up tub of formula, tell them you were born without any nipples!!!!  ------------- 
 
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Posted By: fattartsrock
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 9:06am
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The first 2 or 3 weeks are the hardest, but I promise that by the end of week 3, you will feel better about it. Its important to remember that you are both learningz, so take it easy on yourself. Big hugs to you, I know its hard. I found it easy to make a deal with myself to get though today, then when it gradually got better, a deal with myself to get to the end of the week. Ask your midwife for some help from a lactation consultant or ring La Leche. xxx ------------- The Honest Un PC Parent of 2, usually stuck in the naughty corner! :P |
Posted By: MelanieAndBree
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 9:30am
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Thank you so much for the advice everyone.
------------- Melanie. Mum to Briahna Robyn, 3yrs |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 11:37am
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Hope you manage to get some good support Mell... and I think Lyla was on the right track.
It's not that formula is a terrible thing at all, it's just that once you switch there is no turning back. And as horrible as it is that people feel guilty about doing that, it still happens  so you have to be really sure.
Anyway, it isn't easy... she's learning as much as you are. And definitely get onto the Purelan or Lansinoh cream. They are fabulous. |
Posted By: nikkitheknitter
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 11:38am
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P.S. I had a horrible time for the first couple of weeks... first no milk, then tonnes of it, then blood blisters and cracked nipples. Eeeek, I'm horrified at the thought! Eventually everything settled down and it was fine.
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Posted By: AN E
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 11:52am
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Melln - first off what a lovely little bundle she is! Well done
I had trouble too - cracked nipples and having to wake her to feed her. I have PM'd you a lactation consultant I used (not sure where you are located in AKL). She is really good, really understanding and quite reasonable in price. Everyone says breast feeding is natural - but it doesn't seem that way to start with. It's something you both need to learn, and you are both still recovering from the birth. Take it easy on yourself. Sending you and bubs lots of hugs ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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Posted By: peanut butter
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 12:19pm
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Hey Melln,
i am just coming through the other side of where you are. I was lucky (in some ways) that Tom and I had to stay in hosptial for a week as it meant I really started to get a handle on the feeding thing with HEAPS of support around me. But I am only just getting confident enough to do it in front of people or to change my positions! and last night for the first time I sat there at 4am with him latched onto my sore boob and thought..."this aint too bad after all". That said, if you choose not to BF, dont feel guilty. A happy mum = happy bub! |
Posted By: Mikaela
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 12:43pm
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I'm another one who found it really really hard for the first few weeks. I had cracked, blistered and grazed nipples, and I was taking nurofen before every feed and would still be in tears every time trying to latch him on. Latex nipple shields helped A LOT, a HUGE amount, so definitely give them a go. You can get a pair from the Baby Factory for about $17. By the end of week three I pretty much had it under control though, and now I love feeding him. It's nice not to dread hearing him get hungry. I can totally understand what you're going through
My post-natal midwife is also a lactation consultant, and she's really lovely and so approachable and helpful. She's based on the north shore in Auckland (not sure where you are) but PM me if you want her details. And take care of yourself ------------- http://www.bump-and-beyond.com"> 
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Posted By: jaz
Date Posted: 04 September 2007 at 12:44pm
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It does get easier in time. DS is now 9.5 weeks old and I like that I can feed him instantly anywhere without having to think about how many bottles to pack, mixing and heating bottles when you are out or getting up to make up a bottle in the middle of the night. What helped me was viewing feeding-changing-cuddling as my full time role and doing the bare minimum around the house. There is some great support around including la leche league, lactation consultants, family centres. Your midwife should be able to give you some advise and refer you to these networks if needed. ------------- http://lilypie.com"> 
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