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Renata85 
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 Topic: HT: Is technology ruining the surprise?
Posted: 15 September 2011 at 1:15pm |
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Do you think technology is ruining the surprise of having a baby? Being able to find out the gender of your baby and being able to actually see what your baby looks like (3D scans)... Is that a good thing or a bad thing?
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High9
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 1:20pm |
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Meh, each to their own! At the end of the day it's up to the individuals themselves to decide if it's for them or not.
I always wanted to find out gender, if I could have had a 3d scan I probably would have. DP wanted a surprise but had his heart set on a boy and I worried what would happen if it was a girl so we compromised if we could find out we would (as in if they could tell us at the scan) otherwise we'd wait. We found out and my partner was disappointed for about a couple of hours then came round and we both got really excited!
Next time he wants to find out and I don't so we'll make the same decision again.
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xtina23
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 1:24pm |
Definately not ruining it. Each mother makes the decision to know the gender. I think its great what they can see in scans and pick up on abnormalities that may otherwise get missed if they didnt have a scan at all.
We found out for this first but not finding out for the coming one 
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caliandjack
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 3:01pm |
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Not at all, what comes out at the end is nothing compared to what you see on a scan pic. Finding out didn't change much accept we went from calling baby it to her or she
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Bel
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 3:03pm |
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I think that the benefits of having scans far outweighs any chance of "ruining" the surprise!!
We found out with both of ours because DH wanted to know and I wasn't bothered either way.
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Mum to two beautiful kids 
Luke (09.11.2007)
Amy (01.04.2009)
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MamaT
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 3:29pm |
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I was glad we found out, it meant DH and I were able to bond earlier, especially DH, and like Nic said, he was really hoping for a girl, so it was great for him to process that info and get used to the idea of having a boy, if that'd happened in the delivery room it would have been really difficult.
When DS was born we were both so overcome with joy and emotion and both cried, so I really don't think that us knowing the sex serrated from the birth at all. Of course though, I don't have anything to compare it with.
This time around we will find out again, but we will keep it to ourselves until the birth
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CrazyCass
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 3:54pm |
I wanted a surprise but DH wanted to find out - The scanner told him, then because he knew I had my heart set on one gender he pressured me into sharing so we could bond better with bubs - which has been good, though we haven't shared with family - its nice to keep something to ourselves 
I've found both sides of our families rather rude when we initially said we'd have a surprise - almost like its expected for everyone to find out the gender, and peoples rights to know.... when in their day they couldn't find out! 
I haven't had a 4d scan - I think they are neat, but I want to keep something a surprise (seeing as we know the gender), cause my sister got them and their babies looked EXACTLY like the pictures 
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KH25
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 4:23pm |
The babies sex is a surprise whether you find out at the scan or at birth
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Kelly, mum to DD, 19Jun06 (26wks 1lb15oz) DS1, 24Oct10 (32wks 4lb11oz) and DS2, 31Dec11 (32wks, 4lb11)
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rorylex
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Posted: 15 September 2011 at 10:03pm |
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i have found out with all of my boys and I had a 3D scan with ds3, and the 3d scan pics looked exactly like him we saw straight away he looks a splitting image of our oldest son and 3yrs later he still does.
i had planned to have a 4d scan with ds4 but decided that i wanted to leave what he looked like til he was born and im glad i did as he looks just like me and that was a lovely surprise(that and the mop of hair the others never had lol)
next time we are not finding out gender or having a 3d or 4d scan. i want a complete surprise at birth, though after 4boys im not expecting gender to be a surprise wether i find out or not lol.
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Samuel - 18.6.05
Rory - 15.7.06
Mason - 13.06.08
Emmett - 24.01.10
Baby #5 - cooking
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Blankney94
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Posted: 16 September 2011 at 9:32pm |
First bub we had a 'surprise' - it didn't matter if she turned out to be a boy or a girl. We got neutral baby clothes to get us by initially. Everyone at the baby shower was a good sport and also got us neutral gender presents (although it wouldn't have been easy for them).
Second bub we are TTC - we will probably find out, because if we have a boy we will have bags and bags of girlie baby clothes to rehome, and we'll have to get boy's stuff. I think it pays to be somewhat organised before bubs turns up.
The benefit of the scan definitely outweighs the surprise though - it is more the health of the baby I am concerned with, and the scans can help with detection of and preparation for health/genetic problems.
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Hopes
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Posted: 17 September 2011 at 7:10am |
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If it is, then it's well worth it given all the things we can diagnose before birth now. And I don't think it is.
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My3Sons
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Posted: 17 September 2011 at 8:37am |
I don't think so, after all you have a choice whether to get them or not and the main purpose of a scan is to check bubs is ok and there are no problems, being able to find out gender is just an added bonus if you want to know! Personally I couldnt wait and found out all 3 times the gender
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Raspberryjam
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Posted: 17 September 2011 at 11:01am |
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I think the surprise is the baby - who they look like, how big they are , etc not what flavour they are.
I imagine it is exciting when you dont know, but I doubt its better than knowing
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TheKelly
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Posted: 17 September 2011 at 7:53pm |
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I found out all three times what my children's gender was,and with my last baby we got the 4d scan done,and seeing them for the first time is still the most special three moments of my life,technology didn't take anything away as far as I was concerned,and the lack of surprise was the last thing on my mind
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LJsmum
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Posted: 17 September 2011 at 9:01pm |
not at all, it's essential to have scans to check the well being of baby. Sadly someone i knew years ago didn't have a 20 week scan and her baby was very unwell at birth. He had severve brain problems
The 20 wekk scan can pick up a lot of things and treatment can start or the parents can come to terms with what the baby has.
We found out for both our DS, i wanted to bond and name the baby as they are already part of the family. I couldn't wait 9 months thinking what if it's a girl/boy e.t.c. Plus i was sick of EVERYBODY saying that number 2 would be a girl because we already had a boy. How annoying! I knew he was a boy, mothers know! much loved before he was born.
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susieq
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Posted: 18 September 2011 at 8:18am |
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I dont thinks so, but in saying that 29 years ago no such technology and it was nice having the surprise at the end all three times
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susie
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Chickoin
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Posted: 18 September 2011 at 1:51pm |
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It's up to the parent/s whether they choose to use that technology and what they use it for (checking for abnormalities/gender/just to see baby).
It does take the surprise out of having multiples which personally I think is a good thing!
We didn't find out the gender with both of our girls until the birth although I can see how it would help parents bond with their child before s/he is born. It's so nice to have the choice.
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HT: Is technology ruining the surprise?
