Controlled Crying

Mum2Ella wrote: The_Stuarts wrote: In the end I would stay in the room, with my hand across her stomach and my back to her. I made sure the room was dark and quiet. This first night she was upset about it (not as bad as with CC and CIO) and fell asleep within an hour, the night after took 40 mins and gradually over the next week the settling time got less and less so that within a week I could leave the room straight away without having to sit with her at all. I like the sound of this method. Ella wakes up several times in the night and will only go back to sleep if she is feed....have tried CC but 11/2 hrs later she is still crying off and on and won't go to sleep and I always end up giving in and feeding her.

Michaela used to be fed and rocked to sleep and also had a dummy, you name it she had it. At 10mo she also expected a couple of middle of the night feeds . This method worked for me as I felt like I was still providing comfort while being 'detached'.

The first 2 nights were hard but after that she settled into her new routine (yay). I've probably said it in my previous post but it's so important to choose something you're comfortable with and stick with it for at least a few nights.

Mum2Ella I also used a safety sleep because Michaela was standing in her cot and couldn't lie down again (part of the reason she was getting so upset when left alone). Safety sleep prevented her from standing up which meant she had little choice but to fall asleep.

Hi Topsy, I have been thinking about your post and have found something that I think you should look at. This has come from a Sleep Therapist that I have been working with. I think if you try this method you may have some luck.

Pantley’s gentle removal plan

Here is one way to help your baby to learn to fall asleep without nursing, or using a bottle or pacifier. When your baby wakes, go ahead and pop his pacifier or his bottle in his mouth, or nurse him. But, instead of leaving him there and going back to bed, or letting him fall asleep at the breast, let him suck for a few minutes until his sucking slows and he is relaxed and sleepy. Then break the seal with your finger and gently remove the pacifier or nipple.

Often, especially at first, your baby then will startle and root for the nipple. Try to very gently hold his mouth closed with your finger under his chin, or apply pressure to his chin, just under his lip, while at the same time rocking or swaying with him. If he struggles against this and fusses or roots for you or his bottle or pacifier, go ahead and replace the nipple, but repeat the removal process as often as necessary until he falls asleep.

How long between removals? Every baby is different, but about ten to sixty seconds between removals usually works. You also should watch your baby’s sucking action. If a baby is sucking strongly or swallowing regularly when feeding, wait a few minutes until he slows his pace. Usually, after the initial burst of activity, your baby will slow to a more relaxed “fluttery” pace; this is a good time to begin your removal attempts.

It may take two to five (or even more) attempts, but eventually your baby will fall asleep without the pacifier or nipple in her mouth. When she has done this a number of times over a period of days, you will notice the removals are much easier, and her awakenings are less frequent.

“We got to calling this the Big PPO (Pantley-Pull-Off). At first Joshua would see it coming and grab my nipple tighter in anticipation—ouch! But you said to stick with it, and I did. Now he anticipates the PPO and actually lets go and turns and rolls over on his side to go to sleep! I am truly amazed.” …Shannon, mother of 16-month-old Joshua

If your baby doesn’t nap well, don’t trouble yourself with trying to use the removal technique during the day for naps. Good naps mean better nighttime sleep—and better nighttime sleep means better naps. Once you get your baby sleeping better at night, you can then work on the naptime sleep.

The most important time to use Pantley’s gentle removal plan is the first falling asleep of the night. Often the way your baby falls asleep will affect the rest of his awakenings for the night. I suspect that this because of the sleep-association affect that I explained earlier. It seems that the way in which your baby falls asleep for the night is how he expects to remain all night long.

I am struggling with the dumb dummy and I am willing to give anything a go. There is a couple of suggestions that I like and will try. Thanks very much ladies.

Thanks also for cio definition!

Edited by Gabeden

I resorted to CC after I had missed tired signs and he was constantly overtired and crying. As single Mum I could not pass the baton and needed to break the cycle. My midwife told me 10 min, then pat and reassure, then repeat twice. If still crying, get him up and feed and repeat again for another half hour. The first time I tried it I got to the 60 minute mark while crying my eyes out to Mum on the phone and on the dot, he fell asleep.    I've never had to go that long again and now it is usually 10 minutes of grisling and he's asleep if that. I was open to using a dummy but he wasn't interested (am quite glad because I also thought I'd end up having to put it back in again all the time). I have introduced a muslin square as a comforter though and this is great. He pulls it to him and sucks his fist through it and it keeps him calm. I read this is a good thing to use because if he pulls it over his face he can still breathe and you can throw it in the wash and give him another one without hassle. Could be a transitional object for you?

ooo, i like the sound of the muslin comforter - nice and cheap to replace too (for those lost and left-behind comforters)!