Why do I feel so guilty?

This is totally natural IMO. I felt the exact same way and still did right through to 9 months when I finally stopped for good. It's a really hard decision to make. I didn't find stopping had any effect on my bond and to be honest it was bloody great having my body back to myself (and wearing nice bras that made my boobs look good lol)

Hugs hun but I've come to the conclusion that as mums, once we've stopped feeling guilty about one thing then we'll just feel guilty about something else! Argh, these babies play havoc with our minds!!!

*HUG*

edited to fix typos

Edited by Brenna

I made the same decision and had the same guilt. But now my boy is so settled, life is easier and we are great!

The guilt is normal - I gather we never get away from it!

I think it's a natural reaction too...I gave up for various reasons after only a month but tried to relactate 6 months down the track becuase I was feeling so guilty and was in tears over stopping.

Big hugs babe...you have done amazing IMO going for 5 months and it sounds like you have made a logical decision for good reasons.

Thanks for your posts ladies. I guess if its not guilt for one thing, its guilt for another like you all say.

Doesn't help my decision though and with all these eczema triggers popping up for her (I am watching for what she reacts too but it seems to be EVERYTHING!!), I wonder what on earth is best

I am off to Plunket Family Centre today as they were going to try to help me get Lauren on the bottle, but now I have done that (yay), I am still going to go along cause I really think I need to talk to someone about all my worries.

Thanks again

As other's have said it doesn't matter what you do or when you do it - there's always the guilt. You just need to remember not to let the guilt define/influence who you are or what you do as a mother. You need to be happy 8in your decision, but you need to be happy in yourself too, and from the sounds of things, putting up with engorged breasts for 5 mths.. that would be kinda terrible really, well done for sticking it out as long as you have.

Remember, some time after baby comes along you need to start taking steps to regain yourself, or some part of it, and for you this means your sports etc, and with Bf not fitting in with it, and from the sounds you're in a fair amount of discomfort. Don't feel guilty, it's all too easy to loose who you are and make everything in life about the baby/kids. To be balanced you still need to keep part of you.

But as others have said - there's always the guilt, sometimes you just need to keep reminding yourself of the reasons and tell yourself to get over it.. i do this all the time.

Paris weaned herself by 6 mths, i was down to 1 feed, in the morning, from 1 side only,the rest were bottles and on the day she woke up and wouldn't even take that it was devastating, i still felt guilt even though it was her decision. I tried my hardest and made it work for 15mths with ayja and study and classes and pretty much made my life about making sure i could get to feed her in between classes and clinical practices. I felt immense guilt when, by 15mths, i was down to feeding her at night by BF, and day was bottles unless she was with me. I finally finished nursing, sat state finals, and went out that night with my classmates and celebrated. When i got home, I soooo could not be bothered expressing to get rid of any milk that was affected by the few glasses of wine i'd had. So that was it, she had bottles that night, and every night after cos i realised that i might as well take the opportunity. I'd finally finished 5 yrs of study, and all i was thinking about was the fact that i'd been too lazy to express, even though i knew she was getting a bit old for it.. but like you, it was my one last way to have that special bond i guess.

OMG - novel

Don't feel guilty. Sam self weaned at 8 months and I was devastated. I felt guilty and like a failure even though she would scream and fight it everytime I would try and feed her.
I think I was terrified of losing that bond as well, but guess what, they still snuggle in with bottle feeding and I have found that Sam is more cuddly with me now anyway.
I guess I am saying that Lauren will love you just as much without a booby

As an extra bonus, Sam's excema is a hundred times better since going onto formula. I guess even though I cut out tons in my diet to try and combat it, something was still reacting with her. She is a much happier and less itchy baby now

You feel guilty because once you become a Mum, 'guilty' becomes your middle name! I felt guilty when I stopped BF'ing, I feel guilty if I give Jaymie tinned food instead of homemade, I feel guilty for wanting time out, I feel guilty if she doesn't get 100% of my attention - guilty guilty guilty! But it gets easier!