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Forum LockedSo..... how’s your perenium? (TMI)

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Chickoin View Drop Down
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    Posted: 04 February 2009 at 7:47pm
Because mine's not great.

It *still* stings like a bearch when I have a BM. And I can feel where I tore just inside my vjj and there is a stingy bit there too.

Went to the Dr today but it was a locem and he was really nervous (as in he couldn't even say 'vaginal birth') and only checked my bottom as he had to have the nurse in to watch if he checked my vjj and she was busy.

He prescribed me some lactulose (at my suggestion) and said my vjj is fine (yes, he must have been a psychic dr....)

Anyway, I have been to scared to try 'special cuddles' at all since the birth.

I just want to know if anyone else took this long to heal (it was a 2nd degree tear) and also whether I will ever be able to have relations with DH again???

I mean, I know my bits will never be the same, but does anyone else have a 'sore bit' and still manage relations without, y'know, breaking it?
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MrsMojo View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote MrsMojo Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 February 2009 at 8:53pm

I didn't tear at all so I can't really compare but 2 months does seem to be a long time.  I was 'saddle sore' for about a week after the birth but fine after that.  I'd definitely get a second opinion (this time from someone willing to actually give you a physical exam). 

One thing we were told at antenatal classes was that after the birth until we were comfortable doing BM to hold a wad of toilet paper over our pereniums to basically hold them up while we pushed.

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Chickoin View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Chickoin Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 February 2009 at 9:07pm
Yeah, I did hold paper on my perenium for quite a few weeks but now it makes no difference.

I will get a second opinion but I need to wait a few weeks until I have more money. Cost me $35 today, it's a lot for our tight budget.
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Kellz View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Kellz Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 February 2009 at 9:28pm
That does sound like a while for it still to be that sore,...I had 3 tears requiring tonnes of stitches,...tmi but one tear was to labia, one to perinium and one up my vagina,..all were stitched and we started having sex again after 3 weeks ( when the bleeding stopped). I would go see someone who is actually gonna look properly! I would also phone the drs surgery speak to the manager ( who might be your usual GP who was away) and say that u werent happy with the service of the locum- he so should have had a proper look, or made a time for you to be seen with the nurse, without you having to pay to go again.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote fire_engine Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 04 February 2009 at 9:54pm
Good idea Kellz.

6 months later, things don't feel back to normal - bit sensitive and sore inside on the rare occasions we have sex! Some positions are better than others. Lubricant helps. Condoms are horrible and I am sorer with them. (Might help if I didn't keep forgetting to take the pill).

I don't have a clue if I tore - I had a whopping episiotomy (done by registrar) - my MW's reaction when she saw it was "ouch, that's the worst I've seen in a long time" so am guessing it wasn't just a small nick!

So, in long, yes, you can have special relations! Do it at a time when you are relaxed and there isn't time pressure!
Mum to two wee boys
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote kebakat Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 February 2009 at 7:56am
Sex hurt for me for a good 6 months and was still hurting before we got preggers when we used condoms.

Mine was an episotomy not a tear but doc said it was likely it went through a nerve which is why it hurt.
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blondy View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote blondy Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 February 2009 at 8:41am
i also had a 2nd degree tear with lots of stitching. i know there is still scar tissue there, and i have numb areas down there too! lol i second the lots of lubricant, and fortunately i've been good at remembering to take my pill, as the thought of condoms is ouchie. i've been trying to keep up with my pelvic floor exercises, and think they have helped a bit.

tbh, alot of the issue for me was that i was expecting sex to hurt alot, so i was really tense, but it actually didn't hurt that much at all. lol
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Chickoin View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Chickoin Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 February 2009 at 9:24am
Alright, I will see how I go on the lactulose and when that part is healed I will 'jump back on the horse'. I mean the bit inside my vjj is just a teeny bit stingy when I press on it.
I don't really have a better plan than using condoms as the pill makes me depressed (yeap, all of them, damn hormones) and I don't want an IUD or whatever they are.
I will use a bucket of lube and try to be as relaxed as poss.
If it all fails I will phone the dr and tell on the locum. Then show my normal dr the damage.
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote cuppatea Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 February 2009 at 10:19am
I had an episiotomy and a 2nd degree tear inside and I feel completely normal, no pain with BM or wees. Nothing hurts when I move or sit etc. haven't tried sex yet as am still bleeding but I don't think it is gonna hurt, hope it doesn't anyway.
I would definitely go back and see the doc again, could you book in with a female doc at your surgery? The last time I needed an internal exam that is what I did, that way they don't need the nurse there and it's a little less embarrassing all around.

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Chickoin View Drop Down
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Post Options Post Options   Thanks (0) Thanks(0)   Quote Chickoin Quote  Post ReplyReply Direct Link To This Post Posted: 05 February 2009 at 11:18am
There is only two female nurses there, one that I don't like, the other is ok.
It just takes so much psyching up to go in in the first place, I was all ready to reveal all but now my confidence is all gone again.
In a few weeks I will be all amped up again and ready to barge in there, spread my legs and demand some gawking!
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