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bopmum 
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Joined: 05 November 2008
Location: Tauranga
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 Topic: What would you do???
Posted: 16 July 2011 at 10:01am |
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Need some opinions please!!
So DH and I got married at the end of May this year. We rented a house in Napier and had my mum and dad and sister stay with us.... We asked my sister to pay us $100 for her to stay there. She said that was fine. It has now been 8 weeks, and we haven't seen any money from her, she said last week that I would get it on Thursday - saw her on Thursday at dinner at my parents place, she didn't say anything the whole time, then when we were leaving I asked her if she wanted our bank details and she got all sh!tty saying I would get my money! Everytime I ask for it she gets all sh!tty and we get the same story that she has no money yet last weekend went to gisborne and this weekend going to a concert in Hamilton and still has money for drink and smokes. I believe that I shouldn't have to be asking her for it!
Anyway, tomorrow DH and I are going to a lunch, we can take DS but it's around his sleep time so was going to get my mum and dad to sit with him but they are away and won't be back till later that afternoon. I have just spoken to them and they said that they are going to send my sister back to sit with him till they come back (she is away with them) but thinking about it - I don't want really want to see her unless she has some money for us. I know if I tell Mum and Dad this they will no doubt have something to say about it. But I just feel that I don't really want to see her as she is always in for the free ride and never takes responsibility for anything so why should I let her babysit? Do you know what I mean?? If she was going away with anyone else she would have had to pay in full before she went. Was it our fault that we didn't ask for it then or again should we not have to ask for it as she knew we were expecting some cash from her. She has really pi$$ed me off and now I get nasty txts from her saying that I'm so mean to her and i don't just txt her to see how she is but in truth I can't be bothered!! Am I being unreasonable????? Not too sure what to do!! I know DH won't want her here to watch DS!
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Hopes
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Joined: 06 August 2008
Location: Waikato
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Posted: 16 July 2011 at 10:13am |
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Ooh, I feel your pain. It's a tough one.
You're not being unreasonable at all. You made an agreement, and she's not sticking to it. I'd sit her down and explain clearly (or put it in a letter if you'd rather) that you love her, she's a great person, but she's made a commitment and has to start taking some responsibility - that you think you'd be doing her a disservice if you let her get away with this, because life doesnt work like that and it's best she learns now. So unless she pays up, she's going to have to miss out on some things. I don't think that's unfair at all.
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MissAngel
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Joined: 10 January 2008
Location: Rangiora
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Posted: 16 July 2011 at 10:15am |
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You know what i'd do? And I'm sorry it's harsh - kick her ass out. I had to do that with my sister not so long ago. I love her to bits, but I'm not supporting a nearly 30 year old who cant manage her money and has every excuse and promise under the sun.
Sometimes you just have to treat it like she's a flatmate and not family.
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bopmum
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Joined: 05 November 2008
Location: Tauranga
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Posted: 16 July 2011 at 10:24am |
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Thanks Ladies! Oh she doesn't live with us Miss Angel - couldn't handle that!! It was a holiday house in Napier that we rented for the week of our wedding. Anyway we have never had a really great relationship mainly because she just needs to grow up and stop blugging (sp) off other people. She moved out of her place and went to live back with mum and dad where she paid NOTHING and my dad wasn't working then so was tough with them. Mum was livid with that!! She is 25 years old and just seems to think nothing of it. I'm just sick of it and then she expects things to be all fine and dandy with us and be like best friends - when quite frankly I can't stand her at the moment!! God I sound so mean!!
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Bizzy
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Joined: 01 January 1900
Location: New Zealand
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Posted: 16 July 2011 at 10:58am |
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im sorry to say this but it sounds like you might never get the money, so you may as well get something out of her and let her babysit! If you are lucky she will be gone by the time you get back anyway.
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jazzy
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Posted: 16 July 2011 at 1:35pm |
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Tell her in front of your parents that you want to set up an auto payment for the $100...but I would not expect anything else form her like babysitting or she may charge you...
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What would you do???
